Today's Thought - January

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January 1

Living today

The beginning of the New Year will often bring back sad memories. This has been the big day for hangovers, coming down, remorse, guilt, and shame. But if we stay with our new purpose - staying clean and staying close to our Higher Power - we don't have to fear the New Year. God has forgiven our past mistakes and tomorrow is not yet here. If we do what we know is right today, all else will be taken care of.

It's not always easy to do what is necessary today, but it's impossible to change yesterday or to guarantee what tomorrow will bring. Our year will unfold better by living each day as it comes instead of regretting the past or anticipating the future.

Am I learning to live one day at a time?

I pray for the willingness to deal with today, instead of being obsessed with the past or the future.

You are reading from the book:

Day by Day - Second Edition by Anonymous

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January 2

I will radiate love and good will to others that I may open a channel for God's love to come to all.
--Paramahansa Yogananda

Our spiritual well-being is hindered whenever we isolate ourselves, whenever we withhold our care and attention from the group or a friend. During these moments, our self-centeredness cuts off our connection to our Higher Power, causing peace to elude us and fear to set in.

The converse is also true. Whenever we selflessly express love and genuine concern for others, we can know the presence of God and can be exhilarated by that knowledge.

In this, we have freedom. No one else controls our thoughts or our decisions to give unconditional love and genuine attention to others. We are in charge. It is up to us to keep the channel to our Higher Power always open, always freely flowing. Our spiritual health is our responsibility and it's an easy one to handle. The only requirement is that we offer love and good will to others.

I will enhance my spiritual health today by focusing my love on the women and men on my path so that I may feel God's presence.

You are reading from the book:

In God's Care by Karen Casey

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January 3

A Year To Grow

This new year can be a time of growth in sobriety. While we have no crystal ball that tells us what luck and fortune the year will bring, we do have a program that gives us the power to make the best of this year, to grow in sobriety. We can make progress in overcoming resentment and selfishness, we can help others in their search for happy sobriety, and we can make better use of our talents and opportunities.

We can live sober, and we also can find happiness and true self-esteem in sobriety. In our drinking, a desperate search for happiness and self-esteem compelled us to drink, but we could never find our happy destiny in the bottle. No matter what came to us, things had a way of turning sour as we continued to drink and to take other harmful substances.

In our new life, we have good reason to feel confident and optimistic. We have friends who understand us; we have sponsors who will share with us their own experience and hope. We have a Higher Power who is, as the poet Tennyson said, ". . .closer to us than breathing, and nearer than hands and feet." We face nothing alone, and in the new year all experiences can help us grow.

I face this day with confidence, courage, and optimism. I will know that my Higher Power is present in every person and situation.

You are reading from the book:

Walk in Dry Places by Mel B.

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January 4

Later is now.
--Roseanne Barr

Newcomer

I guess I do have some addiction problems, but right now is a terrible time for me. I know you'd like me to be more involved, use the program more, but I need time - there's something else I have to deal with first. I've tried talking about it at meetings, but no one really has much understanding of my particular problem.

Sponsor

I do respect the fact that there are pressing problems in your life and that you are going to have to face them. Addiction is, in one sense, a response to underlying issues we all have to deal with. And in addition to our inner problems, many of us enter recovery in the midst of some crisis - serious illness, separation, overdue taxes, even homelessness - are situations some of us have had to face while newly recovering. I agree that your problems are real ones. But putting off recovery is not likely to help you with them. It may make things worse.

While I may not be able to help with the specifics of your situation, I can be here to share my experience, strength, and hope as a person in recovery. Recovery is the foundation of my life today. I make it my highest priority, and as time goes on I find the help and strength I need to resolve everything else I have to deal with. If you, too, have the willingness to face your addiction and show up for your recovery, I'm willing to be here.

Today, I will let go of all obstacles to recovery.

You are reading from the book:

If You Want What We Have by Joan Larkin

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January 5

Relying on God has to begin all over again every day as if nothing had yet been done.
--C. S. Lewis

We often try to turn our will and our life over to the care of God, as we understand God, but we're not always successful. We are human. We change our mind. We talk ourselves out of our good resolutions. We forget. We fall back into old, destructive habits of mind and mood.

But all we have to do is make a decision. We don't have to do the actual turning over. We are, in fact, incapable of sustaining this action. But we can, very simply, make the decision. Surprisingly, when we do, turning over our will often gets taken care of for us. We find that we are indeed enjoying what seems to be God's will for us. The secret lies in making the decision as often as needed. We can decide daily or even hourly. We can, in fact, rely on God every time we need help.

This day and every day, I will decide to rely on God all over again.

You are reading from the book:

In God's Care by Karen Casey

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January 6

Without discipline, there's no life at all.
--Katharine Hepburn

We all have deadlines we must meet. We have bills to pay, responsibilities at work, children with school projects - all the innumerable small markers that push life forward.

When we realize we're procrastinating, we need to be committed to not shaming ourselves. Procrastination is not an indication that we have failed. How realistic would it be if we looked forward to doing unpleasant things? It's human to avoid what we'd rather not do.

As we free ourselves from the burden of perfectionism, we're free to better accept our responsibilities. Meeting deadlines as well as we can, one at a time, pays off in serenity and a manageable life. When we are crisis ridden, we are forced to live by other peoples' demands, rather than by our choices. In the face of procrastination, resentment, or perfectionism, we can turn to Step Ten for an inventory. We can forgive ourselves, try to laugh at ourselves, live in the present, and keep going. Today can be better than yesterday.

I may as well admit it - there's probably something I'm avoiding. Is today the day to do it?

You are reading from the book:

Answers in the Heart by Anonymous

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January 7

I shall tell you a great secret, my friend. Do not wait for the last judgment, it takes place every day.
--Albert Camus

"Later." How often have we said this? This trick helps us avoid the tasks of the day. Life is full of tasks - many fun, some boring, and others hard. Can I accept the tasks my Higher Power gives me, easy or hard?

When we used alcohol or other drugs, we'd avoid tasks if they became hard for us. We believed we had more control than we really did. We started to believe we could control outcomes. What we really were doing was setting ourselves up for a great fall. We had to face the fact that when our Higher Power had given us a task, we said no, and turned away. Thus, we turned away from the guiding hand of our Higher Power.

Prayer for the Day

God, help me face You and the tasks You give me. Make me a grateful student of life.

Today's Action

Today I will talk with friends. I will tell them what tasks I'm working on.

You are reading from the book:

Keep It Simple by Anonymous

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January 8

When we really understand the fact of separate realities, we will stop spending so much time and energy trying to change the reality of others.
--Jane Nelsen

What makes us want to control others, not just their actions but their opinions too? Do our personal views need the validation of everyone for us to feel adequate?

Coming to believe that we all have valid perspectives on every experience is akin to coming to believe that there is a Higher Power in charge of our lives. It takes willingness to suspend our assumptions and adopt the principles of this program.

It's liberating, even exhilarating, to realize that we all see situations a bit differently. It's like going from a black-and-white picture to Technicolor. Our experiences are enriched as we view them with new attitudes.

How I see my experiences today is up to me; how my friends see theirs is up to them. My view may complement theirs, but it's mine, solely.

You are reading from the book:

A Woman's Spirit by Karen Casey

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January 9

The man who treasures his friends is usually solid gold himself.
-- Marjorie Holmes

We are the masters of our own fate! We carry all of the equipment necessary to meet each new challenge but there is also a long rope trailing behind us.

We are the masters of our fate, but we aren't on a solitary journey. The only way we can climb our own mountains is by doing it with others. We learn to be alone by learning to love and trust others. We carry our own lifeline connected to the love and caring of our friends.

Today let me be grateful for my individuality and also for the ties that link me to others.

You are reading from the book:

Our Best Days by Nancy Hull-Mast

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January 10

Whatever you can do or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power and magic in it. Begin it now.
--Goethe

Here is a simple way to get in touch with your priorities. Imagine that you have an incurable illness and are given six months to live. As the doctors inform you of their findings, see yourself accepting your imminent mortality with the resolve, "I am going to spend the last months of my life living to the fullest, doing those things that are truly important to me." Then imagine yourself living out those six months in the manner in which you have decided.

Afterwards, note your experience. During your remaining days, what did you do, who did you see, and where did you go? What do these choices say about what is really important to you - your values and priorities? Are you living them today? If you are not, you may want to learn from Tony's story.

After being diagnosed with AIDS, Tony decided to embrace life. He bought a house, planted a garden, and nurtured his important relationships. As a result, he lived the remaining three years of his life in pure joy.

The tragedy is that his life ended just as he was beginning to live. Why wait for a life threatening experience to motivate you to take action? Confront your fears and pursue what brings you happiness and joy.

There is no better time than now.

You are reading from the book:

Listening to Your Inner Voice by Douglas Bloch

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January 11

The gift of love means this: I want to share with you whatever I have that is good.
--John Powell, S.J.

How loving are we, really? Do we keep score when we do favors for a friend, keeping in mind that we're owed one? Do we hoard rather than share a favorite treat, hoping to prolong our own feast? And the good mood, when it's ours, do we use it to help another raise her spirits or do we secretly gloat because we're "in a better place"?

The opportunity to respond with love visits us throughout each day. A smile, a kind gesture, including someone in a conversation, noticing a job well done, are acts of love, acts that connect our hearts, at least for a moment.

When someone has shared love with us in some form, we notice it and are moved.

You are reading from the book:

Worthy of Love by Karen Casey

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January 12

Next year I'm going to be better than I am now, but today I'm the best I can be.

It is quite possible to waste a lot of time and energy trying to make impossible changes. Many of us, inspired by the dynamics of the program and driven more by enthusiasm than prudence, strike out on missions that cannot be accomplished - missions we cannot win and should never undertake.

Turning back the clock is one of these. It can't be done. Controlling someone else's behavior is another. We can set the stage for the desired behavior, encourage it, and improve the odds by getting out of the way, but we don't have it in our bag of tricks to make people think, feel, or do any one thing.

The program addresses the art of the possible. The only options we have are the options that are available to us. If our former partners don't want to reconcile with us, that's not an available option. A happily-ever-after marriage is not possible if we haven't yet learned how to have a healthy relationship. Instead, we can focus on acquiring these people skills by building to our own possibilities.

Today, I will examine my range of available choices.

You are reading from the book:

Days of Healing, Days of Joy by Earnie Larsen and Carol Larsen Hegarty

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January 13

Our problem is that we expect to feel secure.

Many of us have had past crises and problems, yet our worries and anxieties continue in the present. We believe that our situation causes our fears and we say, "If only things were different, I could relax." Yet even when everything is going well, we still get anxious that something unseen is amiss. When we are immersed in our fears, unable to let go and live life joyfully, we may become emotionally absent from our loved ones.

Our problem is not that life is insecure. Of course it is. Our problem is that we expect to feel secure. We put great energy into achieving control and having everything "just right," but quite naturally we end up without control. Then we think something is wrong. Instead, we can choose to turn our fears over to our Higher Power. We do that by talking about our fears, taking the steps we can, and trusting our Higher Power for the outcomes. Then we return to emotional contact in our relationship.

Tell your partner something you fear and turn it over to your Higher Power.

You are reading from the book:

The More We Find In Each Other by Merle Fossum and Mavis Fossum

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January 14

Step Two: Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.
-- Step Two of Al-Anon

We come to believe in a better life through the powerful gift of other people - hearing them, seeing them, and watching the gift of recovery at work in their lives. There is a Power greater than us. There is real hope now that things can and will be different and better for our life and us.

We are not in a "do it ourselves" program. We do not have to exert willpower to change. We do not have to force our recovery to happen. We do not have to pull ourselves up by our bootstraps just so we believe that there is a Power greater than ourselves - one who will get the job done in our life. This Power will do for us what our greatest and most diligent efforts could not accomplish.

Our Higher Power will restore us to a sane and beneficial life. All we do is believe.

Look. Watch. See the people around you. See the healing they have found. Then discover your own faith, your own belief, your own healing.

Today, regardless of my circumstances, I will believe to the best of my ability that a Power greater than myself can and will restore me to a peaceful, sane way of living.

You are reading from the book:

The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie

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January 15

Be patient with the faults of others; they have to be patient with yours. --Our Daily Bread

How do we feel when someone we know makes a mistake? What happens when the boss makes an error and we have to work overtime to straighten it out? How do we feel when a cashier overcharges us, the post office loses our package, or the mechanic doesn't fix a problem?

Most of us become angry. Since we have been brought up from childhood to believe we are victims, it seems only natural in adult life to feel the same way. We imagine all those people had it in for us; they were all in league somehow to make us suffer.

But everybody makes mistakes. Who among us is perfect? We have made many mistakes in our lives that have probably brought inconveniences to others. If we can learn to treat the faults of others with patience and understanding instead of anger and resentment, we may find others treating us accordingly.

I can overlook the mistakes of others as I would want them to over look mine.

You are reading from the book:

Night Light by Amy E. Dean

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January 16

Sobriety is a big gift box with a hundred little packages inside to unwrap.
--Oscar Morris

Sobriety is its own reward and then some. Sobriety is a condition of openness and receptivity to the treasure of life. It is the ability to view the world through gentler glasses and hear our fellows with kinder ears. It is the ability to see things as they really are, instead of how we'd like them to be. It is a condition of honesty and willingness to be true to ourselves and others.

On this day we can look out the window when we get up in the morning. No matter what we see - another building, a yard, even an airshaft - it can remind us that we're not the same people we used to be. We can look at this world without fear. It won't bite back anymore.

Sobriety is seeing the world with open eyes. It is the gift of learning how to view the world as a friendly and loving place to be. Sobriety is crying without shame and laughing with abandon. It is a gift that wakes us up with hope and puts us to sleep with peace.

Today let me cherish my gift of sobriety and not take it for granted.

You are reading from the book:

Body, Mind, and Spirit by Anonymous

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January 17

I came to understand that it was all right to do things for people as long as I did it for the sake of doing it... the value being more in the act than in the result.
--Joanna Field

We've all heard the sentiment that it is better to give than to receive. Yet we may find it difficult to give to others, whether that giving involves an actual gift or an act of giving of ourselves: caring for someone who is ill, running an errand for someone, giving a backrub, or extending an invitation to someone who is alone.

We may feel afraid to do for others without any expectations of receiving something in return. To give unselfishly exposes our feelings and shows we care. Yet if we can look beyond our fears to the selflessness of our giving actions, there is a great reward -- knowing we had the courage to risk giving to someone.

The risks we take in giving to others are lessons for ourselves as well as for those whose lives we touch.

The gift of giving opens doors to the homes of our souls.

You are reading from the book:

Night Light by Amy E. Dean

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January 18

Life is not always what one wants it to be, but to make the best of it as it is, is the only way of being happy.
--Jennie Jerome Churchill

We are generally so certain that we know what's best for ourselves. And we are just as often certain that what we think is best will guarantee happiness. Perhaps we should reflect on all the times in the past when our wishes didn't come true - fortunately.

Did any one of us expect to be doing today, what we each are doing? We may have expected children, a particular kind of home, a certain career, but did we really anticipate all that life has wrought? Addiction, and then recovery from it, was probably not in our pictures. But it does fit into the big picture. The happiness we experience today probably doesn't visit us in the way we anticipated a few years back. But it is measured out according to our needs. The choice to be happy with what is, is ours to make, every moment.

I can take life as it is, and trust that it is just right, just what it needs to be. The big picture guarantees me lasting happiness. Today's experiences will move me a step closer.

You are reading from the book:

Each Day a New Beginning by Karen Casey

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January 19

"I can't help it" . . . that's what we all say when we don't want to exert ourselves.
--Eva Lathbury

Irresponsible behavior is not unfamiliar to us. Passivity is equally familiar. In the past, excusing ourselves of all responsibility prevented us from being blamed. We have learned that it also prevented us from feeling worthy, from fulfilling our potential, from feeling the excitement that comes with achievement.

Our fear of failure helped us to be irresponsible. We may still fear failure, but the program offers us an antidote. We can't fail if we have turned our lives over to our higher power. We will be shown the way to proceed. Our fellow travelers have messages for us that will smooth our path.

I have chosen recovery. I have already said, "I can help it." I will celebrate that I am taking responsibility for my life today.

You are reading from the book:

Each Day a New Beginning by Karen Casey

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January 20

A bird came down the walk: He did not know I saw; He bit an angle-worm in halves and ate the fellow, raw.
--Emily Dickinson

We must look very different to the birds than we do to each other. Likewise, birds seem different to us than they do to each other. Neither the way we see birds nor the way they see us is the "right" way. They are simply different ways of seeing.

If we could turn birds into people so they would see things the way we do, eat the way we do, and think the way we do, we would lose the idea of flying. The knowledge that flight is possible is a gift birds have given us.

We do well to remember this when we get upset at others for not doing things the way we would. Varieties of styles, appetites, and ideas are gifts that enrich the world and bring more possibilities into our lives.

When others disagree with me today, will I accept their gift?

You are reading from the book:

Today's Gift by Anonymous

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January 21

Let every man be occupied in the highest employment of which he is capable and die conscious that he has done his best.
--Sidney Smith

Doing something that we feel good about never loses its importance to our lives. And it need not be a prestigious occupation for our work to be important. In fact, who are we to decide what kind of job is truly important? The most menial of tasks may have a profound impact on a particular man or woman today, and that's what really counts in God's grand scheme.

It is said by some that the highest order of employment is the offering of love and acceptance to the people on our paths today. For us to define employment solely in terms of career is shortsighted. Every minute we're awake we're busy with something, and that means we're employed.

A broader definition of employment gives every one of us a chance to put in a productive day. Knowing that our presence, our words, our willingness to listen to someone else has made life better for them makes it better for us, too.

I will go to bed fulfilled if I have shown love and respect for others today.

You are reading from the book:

Keepers of the Wisdom by Karen Casey

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January 22

A crisis is an opportunity to rely on our Higher Power.

When we came to this program, we were told right away that a Higher Power is watching out for us and that we can look to that Power whenever we want guidance or peacefulness. Let's not resist this invitation.

Most of us had daily crises before turning to this program for help. Our attempts to control other people caused many of these crises. So did our reactions to the natural ebb and flow of human existence. Now we have to take the plunge and begin to rely on our God, however we understand God, to show us the way to handle every experience that's part of our Divine unfolding.

I will look to God today, and every experience will make sense in the whole of my existence.

You are reading from the book:

A Life of My Own by Karen Casey

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January 23

Focusing on Solutions

If we are to learn to cope with our illness and our life, we must begin focusing on solutions, not just on our problems.

But this means we must change our attitude and outlook. We can no longer live as if there are only problems in our lives. We can no longer consider ourselves victims and hold on to the attitude that our life will never change. Nor can we continue to be consumed by self-pity. If so, we will fail to take responsibility for finding solutions. We will continue to live within what we have grown to know so well: our problems.

Do I let my problems define me today or do I seek solutions?

Thought for the Day

For every problem there is a solution.

You are reading from the book:

A Restful Mind by Mark Allen Zabawa

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January 24

Example is the lesson that all men can read.
-- Gilbert West

Patterning our lives after others is familiar. Maybe as kids we emulated "toughies" or the teacher's pet. As we grew, the criteria changed, but we sought role models, nonetheless. The career we chose and the family relationships we developed may have been inspired by the example of another. Today may be no different. Seeing our friends and acquaintances pursue paths unlike our own gives us ideas to explore. How lucky we are that teaching is never done and learning is merely a decision.

The only thing that has actually changed is our age. The opportunities for growth continue to flow. Our purpose for being here remains the same. Our responsibility to ourselves never abates. It's comforting to count on these things. It makes our choices simpler.

There's always the right step to take, the right response to make, the right attitude to foster. But if ever we're in doubt, the impulse to forgive and to love will never be wrong.

My action today may be an important example for a friend. I pray to choose my steps and words wisely.

You are reading from the book:

Keepers of the Wisdom by Karen Casey

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January 25

Being true

We believe we can become beautiful people, free of addiction. With belief in a Power greater than ourselves, our Twelve Step program, and the fellowship, we don't have to stay where we were. Our purpose in life is to stay sober and clean.

Our Higher Power knows our true purpose in life and will help us. Our Higher Power knows what we are capable of becoming, although others may misjudge us.

Am I staying true to my purpose?

I pray that I may see the good within me and remain true to my purpose.

You are reading from the book:

Day by Day - Second Edition by Anonymous

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January 26

Being able to be wrong

We had to compete with everyone, sometimes subtly, sometimes less subtly. We always had to be right, to be wrong seemed unbearable. We could never seem to bring ourselves to say simply, "I was wrong." We were afraid of what would happen to us if we did. Our egos were very fragile; we were never as strong as we had led ourselves to believe.

We came to discover, however, that real strength comes from being able to be wrong and from being willing to change our ways of thinking and living.

Can I face being wrong and learn from it?

Higher Power, help me realize each day that it is okay to be wrong, that real communication with other people depends on my being willing to see other points of view, and that being teachable is a divine quality.

You are reading from the book:

Day by Day - Second Edition by Anonymous

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January 27

In three words I can sum up everything
I've learned about life:
It goes on.
--Robert Frost

Most of us are afraid of anything we can't control. Life is one of these things. During our drinking and drugging days, we had checked out of life. We were sitting on the sidelines, pretending we could get back into it whenever we wanted. But life went on without us. Friends built careers and loving families, and we fell behind. Friends built deeper intimate relationships. They became skillful at living a life of values and communicating with their Higher Power. We fell behind.

Working the Steps requires us to get working. Ours is a program of action. At times we will want to stop and sit on the side of the road again. But we must go on! Go and be of service. Go talk to a friend. Go to an extra meeting. We got sober to have a life, not to sit on the sidelines. We must be recovery in motion, living a program of action.

Prayer for the Day

Place me in the middle of life, Higher Power.
Help me be a person of action. When fear says, "Stop!"
Please whisper in my ear, "Go on, go on!"

Today's Action

Today I will be active and involved in my program and in life. I will be a doer not a watcher.

You are reading from the book:

God Grant Me... by Anonymous

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January 28

A spiritual life is natural

Conscious Contact. Coming into what is clearly a spiritual program, we may have been fearful that our own unworthiness would hold us back. We may have believed that a spiritual life and a "conscious contact" with God are reserved for a few people with saintly qualities.

What we must know is that the spiritual life is every person's right. It includes the human qualities that have brought our greatest progress. "The spirit of the thing" is an ordinary phrase, but it expresses the presence of a Higher Power in our lives.

What's most useful to know is that we can contact our Higher Power at any time, in any place. This can be extremely important when we are in very bad situations. We always have a Higher Power to pull us through and to set things right in our lives. That's our birthright as human beings.

I'll turn to my Higher Power frequently throughout the day, if only for a few moments each time. This will keep me on the right path.

You are reading from the book:

Walk in Dry Places by Mel B.

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January 29

Although the act of nurturing another's spiritual growth has the effect of nurturing one's own, a major characteristic of genuine love is that the distinction between oneself and the other is always maintained and preserved.
--M. Scott Peck. M.D.

Those we love must be free to love us in return, or leave us. The honest evidence of our love is our commitment to encouraging another's full development. We are interdependent personalities who need one another's presence in order to fulfill our destiny. And yet, we are also separate individuals. We must come to terms with our struggles alone.

One gift of life available to each of us is security, the sense that accompanies the recognition of our spiritual center. Helping someone else discover their spiritual gifts strengthens our own. Nothing is too difficult when we act in unison as separate entities, relying on the spiritual core that strengthens us to meet any situation.

My own spiritual center will be strengthened if I help someone.

You are reading from the book:

The Promise of a New Day by Karen Casey and Martha Vanceburg

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January 30

Expectations

Higher Power, help me stop expecting so much from myself.

I set unrealistic standards, and when they are not met, unhappiness follows.

Help me be true to myself and only expect what I am capable of doing. As I grow in recovery and do my assignments every day, I am able to do more.

Your will provides realistic goals. Your will provides what I need to succeed.

You are reading from the book:

The 12 Step Prayer Book Volume 2 by Bill P. and Lisa D.

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January 31

Perfection is expressing God's will enthusiastically.

Sponsors tell us that this is a simple program we are prone to complicate. Reflecting on our lives, we probably would agree. Because we doubt that God will tell us how to handle the circumstances facing us, we aggressively move ahead, making decisions that are often not in sync with God's will and certainly not in our long-term best interests. We complicate our lives unnecessarily.

Before we came into the Twelve Step program, most of us wanted to be perfect. We worked hard and oftentimes were overachievers because we needed the praises of others. Sadly, because we too often relied solely on ourselves, we missed the mark. Now we are learning to let God direct us. Each time we fulfill God's will, we'll experience the perfection and the praises we'd sought for so long. This is a much simpler way to live.

Today I will use the Third Step every time I have a question about my life.

You are reading from the book:

A Life of My Own by Karen Casey