Today's Gift for Families - May 2014

[MajestyJo]

Thursday, May 1, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

Hold fast to dreams,
For if dreams die,
Life is a broken-winged bird
That cannot fly
—Langston Hughes

Watching birds spread their wings and soar can remind us of the best in ourselves. In joyful moments we all feel our own desire to fly, to reach toward what we dream of doing.

Our dreams give us a direction to fly. Birds fly toward the light for joy, toward green leaves for shelter, to water and berries for food. In the same way, our dreams direct us to the course of our own joy, shelter, and nourishment.

Sometimes as we fly, we bump into disappointments. They may temporarily stun us or slow us down. But just like birds that are occasionally wounded, we can heal ourselves and fly again. We can choose to not let the hardships of life break our spirited wings. Rather, we can keep spreading our wings, soaring in the spirit of joy.

Am I flying today, or must I heal a wound first?

We sometimes wonder why we can't get off the ground and we wonder why. Perhaps that broken wing needs healing, sometimes it is a rest and a time out to top ourselves up, and we forget that we have to have in order to give 'it' away, instead of using others to make ourselves feel good. I have to do my part.

[MajestyJo]

Friday, May 2, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

A bird came down the walk: He did not know I saw; He bit an angle-worm in halves And ate the fellow, raw.
—Emily Dickinson

We must look very different to the birds than we do to each other. Likewise, birds seem different to us than they do to each other. Neither the way we see birds or the way they see us is the "right" way. They are simply different ways of seeing.

If we could turn birds into people so they would see things the way we do, eat the way we do, and think the way we do, we would lose the idea of flying. The knowledge that flight is possible is a gift birds have given us.

We do well to remember this when we get upset at others for not doing things the way we would. Varieties of styles, appetites, and ideas are gifts that enrich the world and bring more possibilities into our lives.

When others disagree with me today, will I accept their gift?

That is a gift of recovery. I had to have a change in attitude in order to grow and recover.

Very seldom do the words come back to me in thought, "Flock you and the horse you rode in on." I don't want to be that kind of person in today.

Let it begin with me, it is about me and my attitude, not the "A" in my life. Many have shown me the way, many did my research for me, many showed me how to not work my program, and for that I am grateful.

[MajestyJo]

Saturday, May 3, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

Everyone has talent. What is rare is the courage to follow the talent.
—Erica Jong

How easy it is to look at others with envy, certain that everyone we know is better in every way: school, sports, games, and appearance. What we may not know is that each of us is exactly right the way we are. And what's more, no one of us is without talent. Perhaps we simply have not discovered it yet, or maybe we've been certain we knew what the talent should be, rather than letting the talent within us emerge.

It's reassuring to know that we are talented, that we are special just as we are, that no one else is able to bring to this life exactly the same ingredients that we're able to bring.

What special talent shall I exercise today?

Just trying to be the best me I can be in today. Don't try to be something I am not. Share what and who you are with others, pay it forward, it was freely given to you. Recognize your talent as a gift.

[MajestyJo]

Sunday, May 4, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

A person can grow only as much as his horizon allows.
—John Powell

Should you become a doctor or perhaps an astronaut? Maybe being a writer or an athlete appeals to you. Dreaming of what to be can be useful. It helps us set our goals and learn our values. Also, using our imagination lets us "try on" a future role. We learn about our life's direction through our dreams of where to go and what to do.

Not all dreams are helpful, however. Sometimes we daydream about other things when we really do need to listen. Learning how to use our imagination to guide our plans for growing up takes practice.

Imagining ourselves happy and brave will help us feel both. Imagining ourselves as failures can be just as powerful. Let's respect the power of the imagination and use it to form good images of our future.

How can I build goodness and success into my future today?

Open my mind and widen my vision, and look for my God's message in all areas of my life. Don't overlook or reject the messenger, know that God utilizes people, places, and things to show me a better way of living.

[MajestyJo]

Monday, May 5, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

I have spread my dreams under your feet;
Tread softly because you tread on my dreams.
—William Butler Yeats

When we hold a piece of crystal to the light, it paints rainbows on the wall. When we tap it lightly with a spoon, it sings like a bell. But when we drop it, it shatters in colorless, silent pieces on the floor.

Human beings, sometimes to our amazement, can be as fragile as glass. It's especially easy to forget what makes people we live with or have known for a long time shine or sing. We take for granted the very qualities that made us love them in the first place.

When we forget how to see and hear the people we love, how to appreciate them, we grow careless. Too often, from sheer neglect, the relationship between us grows dull and silent, then slips, falls, and shatters. Paying attention to other people's needs and feelings can prevent this.

Whose presence can I appreciate today?

The presence I need to feel and appreciate He is there, is my God.
I appreciate that I know is is there and I can go to Him and I don`t have to go searching for Him, He is there. All I have to do is surrender to the moment, accept, and ask for help and give thanks.

[MajestyJo]

Tuesday, May 6, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

"Take it away at once," stormed the Princess, stamping her tiny foot in its embroidered slipper. "I hate real flowers; their petals fall off and they die."
—Hans Christian Andersen

If love is reserved for things that never die, love is doomed to die. If flowers fade in a minute or two, will not stones wear to sand in time? Even this earth, this garden of life, one day will be like the dust of stars. We must walk gratefully, carefully on it now. Now is the lifetime that passes here, now is the best of all days; now is the flower's eternity in the sun, our chance of a lifetime.

This is all we have, this moment. Within it, anything can be done, any dream fulfilled, if we only use it well. Why hold back? There is nothing to stop us.

What can I do to use this moment well?

Enjoy it, accept it, be aware of it, and give thanks for it.

[MajestyJo]

Wednesday, May 7, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

Our deeds will travel with us from afar, and what we have been makes us what we are.
—George Eliot

We grow within, the way a tree does. We've all seen the rings representing the years of a tree's life. We carry our histories with us, too. Our actions, our attitudes, our goals, and our dreams all gather together inside us to make us what we are today. We're probably ashamed of some of our past, but our behavior each day adds to our history, and we control it.

We can't escape our mistakes, but we don't have to repeat them; and every day that is lived well gives us a history to be proud of.

How can I add goodness to my past - and my future - by my actions today?

For me, it was about not bringing the past into today, unless it was to bring it out and allow it to heal. As they say, unless you acknowledge it and feel the feelings, you can't let it go.

It was important for me to recognize that the future doesn't have to include the past, if I take my God with me. I try not to live my day thinking that things will be the same in today as it was prior to recovery, if I am working a program and living the Steps.

[MajestyJo]

Thursday, May 8, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

Talking little, and with the low, tender part of our voices, as in nodding to one who already knows what you mean.
—Tess Gallagher

Once there was a small child whose only word was no. When she wanted to indicate yes, she nodded her head emphatically. What she liked to do instead of talk was play. She liked to play outside in the meadow with the bugs and rocks and plants.

The mullein was her favorite plant. She rubbed the soft, furry leaves across her cheek. Her mother told her that in the old days, American Indians used these leaves as bandages. Several years later, Lucy picked a mullein leaf and took it in the house to her mother. "Look, Mama. Indian owee."

We, too, can remember some surprising things from the dim past, before we could talk or understand all that went on around us. Communication does not always depend on words alone but on the tenderness with which they are spoken. Walking through the world in a tender, loving way is a form of communication that goes beyond words to our deepest feelings.

What are some of the ways we show our love without words?

Pass on a smile. Our body language speaks volumes. Learn to listen, and listen to learn, acknowledge and affirm someone else. Did you ever think to see someone in passing and say, "I really like your suit," or "I really like your shoes, they really go with your outfit," or "Thank you for your smile, you cheered me up."

[MajestyJo]

Friday, May 9, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

Planning is deciding what to change today so tomorrow will be different from yesterday.
—Ichak Adizes

A house is like a lump of clay that can be molded and changed. It can be fixed and shaped, torn down and added to, painted, papered, carpeted, and panelled. We can think about how to change it, find pictures in books, and order plans. We can stock up on supplies, take fix-it classes, and get advice from others. But the house will remain unchanged until we pick up a brush, grab a bucket of paint, and get to work. Only then will we see tomorrow the results of what we did today.

Our plans help us construct a vision of how we'd like the future to be, but only actions will bring these things about. With confidence in the rightness of our desires, we can be assured that God never gives us a dream we can't reach.

What action can I take today to make tomorrow's changes?

Apply the program to all areas of my disease. Food, rest, exercise, etc. for the body, mind, and spirit.

I was just talking to my sponsor about this tonight. Greater acceptance and lower expectations, living in today instead of comparing it to the past, especially as we age.

[MajestyJo]

Saturday, May 10, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

To apologize: to lay the foundation for a future offense.
—Ambrose Bierce

"I'm sorry," said the blind man as he whipped the mare. "I'm sorry," said the mare, as she kicked the blind man in return.

"We're sorry," they assured themselves, as they pushed each other around again and again. Often, we push our troubles with other people around, creeping along in the old rough way, refusing to change because we're too involved to see another choice.

There's little sorrow in being sorry all the time. A true apology doesn't try to explain. Sometimes a true apology just breaks down and cries. Then maybe we're ready to go on - take someone by the hand, tell the whole sad truth, and work to find a better way.

Are my apologies excuses, or requests to be forgiven?

A sorry isn't an amend. An apology doesn't cut it, unless you work to not doing the same thing again. We have lots of excuses, but once we come into recovery, we don't have a reason to continue living the way we were. We will know a new freedom and a new happiness. We will be given new tools to handle life on life's terms.

[MajestyJo]

Sunday, May 11, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

I'm delighted that the future is unsure. That's the way it should be.
—William Sloane Coffin

Some of life's richest moments are the most unexpected: the old friend met by chance, or the new one discovered when neither of us were really looking; the toy at the bottom of the toy box, rediscovered and loved anew; the book, the flower, the shaft of light we were in the right place at the right time to notice and embrace.

It is important to dream and plan, to work toward goals, to mark the milestones we pass on life's journey. No less important, though, is to open ourselves to the unexpected joys awaiting us every day.

Am I ready, today, to expect the unexpected?

This reminds me of the many times I have asked myself, "Why me!" Why not me? What makes me different? Do we ask ourselves this when good things come? Why do we think we are the only one? Are we being judgmental and think we are exempt from life? Do we thing that because we are loved by God that we free from sad, sorrow, pain and hurt? He sees us through it, but life does happen. When we put expectations on the day, we make ourselves more vulnerable to pain. What I put out, I get back. So if I go around with negative thoughts, they will often come back in kind.

[MajestyJo]

Monday, May 12, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

I would be honest, for there are those who trust me.
—Howard Arnold Walter

Some of those around us seem to see only the good in us. They trust and respect us, even when we ourselves may not feel we deserve it.

A young girl once talked about her grandfather. She said, "He was the only person in my life who saw the good in me." She mentioned that she sought to please her grandfather and not disappoint the trust, which he placed in her. He brought out the best in her because of the way that he looked at her. Each of us can be like this grandfather by focusing on the good in other people. We can use our spiritual eyes to see love, honesty, trustworthiness, and unselfishness in the heart of another. As we look for the good, we are doing our part to help create it.

Do I see the good in those around me right now?

Had to recognize that others had their dis-ease too, whether it was recognized or not. It wasn't my job to tell them and take their inventory. All I could do was pray for them.

As my son use to say, "Look at me your son, not my disease."

[MajestyJo]

Tuesday, May 13, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

Talent--I don't know what that is. It's will. You dream a dream and then you build it.
—Philippe Petit

Even the most accomplished pianists begin at some point by playing simple scales and exercises. With daily practice, their hands learn to find the correct notes and become limber enough to play well. They learn each new piece of music very slowly at first, until, with study and practice, they can play almost without effort.

In the beginning, the pianist only dreams of being an accomplished musician. This dream helps the artist through many hours of practice and study.

Talent is really the combination of a dream and the time spent building it. We develop our ability by devoting time to the skills that interest us. Like the musician, we become talented through daily practice - the daily building of a dream. By developing our talents, we develop who we are.

Who am I becoming today?

The best me I can be in today!

[MajestyJo]

Wednesday, May 14, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

Every tomorrow has two handles. We can take hold of it with the handle of anxiety or the handle of faith.
—Henry Ward Beecher

Once there was a boy who always looked on the bright side and always expected the best. He expected to like brussels sprouts before he had ever tasted them, for instance, and to like his teacher on the first day of school. Because he had such a sunny outlook on things, he was rarely disappointed.

But the boy's father thought he wasn't realistic, so one Christmas he decided to test him. On Christmas morning there were many presents, all but one small one were for the boy's brother. The brother opened his gifts with glee - a train set, a toy robot, a cowboy outfit, even his own TV.

Through all this, the boy smiled expectantly, confident the contents of his small box would equal the splendor of his brother's gifts. When it was his turn he ripped the box open to find only a pile of hay and some very smelly animal droppings.

To his father's astonishment, the boy clapped his hands with joy and ran immediately to the backyard. "Yippee!" he cried. "There must be a pony here somewhere!"

If I expect the best, just for today, what wondrous things might happen?

My day is as good as my attitude toward it. I try not to put high expectations on a day, just accept it as it comes and give thanks. That way I am not disappointed and hurt, but blessed and grateful.

[MajestyJo]

Thursday, May 15, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

What is moral is what you feel good after.
—Ernest Hemingway

Each of us has a little voice inside us that tells us what is good and what is bad. For instance, if our friends are making fun of someone who is different than we are, how do we feel if we join in the laughter? Do we feel more comfortable if we refuse to join in, or if we tell them their jokes are not funny?

As we grow, we learn more and more to trust the inner voice. Sometimes, in times of dark confusion, we have to listen very hard, but it is there to guide us. It is a beacon showing us the way out of the darkness of uncertainty. It is our guide to goodness.

Will I have the courage to listen to my inner voice today?

Had to distinguish if the inner voice was my Lower or Higher Power. Was it my God's Will or my own.

http://www.animated-gifs.eu/mammals-pigs-18/0048.gif

[MajestyJo]

Friday, May 16, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

More majestic than a cardinal, as shining as a pyx.
—Gustave Flaubert

What in the world is a pyx? If we don't have an expert nearby, we'll have to look in a book. There we'll find it defined, explained, fixed. Now what in the world is love? It doesn't live in a tree or a book, so where in the world do we look? Can we find love in the house, maybe swept under the rug? Can we know the feel of it in our hands, see it written on the lines of faces we know? Does it make a sound - maybe laugh and cry? Does it know how to speak, form words carefully, write letters? Is it only written on the heart?

We find love inside us, and our love seeks itself out in others. We find it in the familiar footfall of a brother or sister, the sound of a parent's voice in the next room, and yet, too often we don't express it directly. When we do, our love thrives in all we do together.

What does love have to do with the ordinary facts of life?

For me it is a desire to live; much better than my desire to stop the world and get off, which is how I felt before recovery.

[MajestyJo]

Saturday, May 17, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

Growth is the only evidence of life.
—John, Cardinal Newman

We should be thankful we can never reach complete serenity. If we could, we would never have the need to improve ourselves. We would stop growing, because there would be no reason to learn any more than we already know, and we would become bored. Even the things, which seem so serene in nature usually contain a struggle within. A lake, with a swan gliding slowly across it, seems a perfect picture of serenity. But, unseen below the surface, fish, turtles, and frogs struggle each day for survival.

The important thing is to accept the struggles as a part of the beauty of life, not as blemishes on it.

What struggles shall help me grow better today?

Learning to say "No!" Doing first things first, which is my sobriety (soundness of mind). Without me, I have nothing. My family and friends don't have me either, they can't do it for me, they can be a support, but I need to be honest with myself, open my mind to new ideas and concepts, and be willing to go to any length to maintain that sobriety. No just putting down the drug, but applying the Steps to myself and remember recovery begins with me. We may not think we are addicts, but we live our life through others, we pick up people to fix and take care of. I am powerless over people, places, and things.

I can't stop my son from using, but I can pray for him and not enable him.

[MajestyJo]

Sunday, May 18, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

He that cannot forgive others breaks the bridge over which he must pass himself; for every man has need to be forgiven.
—Thomas Fuller

We have all seen adventure movies in which the heroes or villains are caught on a bridge that collapses. As they fall to whatever lies below, they are perhaps able to climb to one side or the other. But for the time being, their ability to cross between the two sides is gone.

When we have been hurt by people in our lives, or when we have hurt others, mutual forgiveness is needed in order to rebuild the trust between us. It is very much like rebuilding a bridge - one piece at a time. We take cautious steps at first - testing the safety and strength of our bridge.

When two people have become separated by loss or anger, it is forgiveness that can rebuild the bridge between them. Forgiveness needs time and so does the rebuilding of trust.

Can I begin to rebuild a friendship today?

This reminded me of the question, "How do you start a new meeting?"
With a resentment and a coffee pot!

For me it is about seeing where they are going and what direction they are taking. I have a couple of friends who are heavy smokers and I just can't go into their home. When they came to me, they would smoke on my balcony, but they would bring the smoke back in with them.

I can pick up the phone and call, but I can't jeopardize my sobriety. If I picked up a cigarette, I would die faster than if I picked up a drink or another drug. First things first, my sobriety. Hopefully the lung specialist will have some answers for me on the 28th. It is one of the reasons that I can't always go to a meeting, I can't get through all the smoke without having chronic pain and major coughing fits.

The forgiveness is there although I do have to admit, that I have problems with people, who keep doing and saying the same things over and over again, and have not made the steps to change and help themselves. I can't do it for them. All I can do is pray.

[MajestyJo]

Monday, May 19, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

As we learn we always change, and so our perception. This changed perception then becomes a new Teacher inside each of us.
—Hyemeyohsts Storm

Hyemeyohsts Storm's book, Seven Arrows, tells the stories of one of the Indian tribes in this country before most of its members were killed. They believed that change was important for growth. Change is sometimes frightening. We usually prefer the familiar, no matter how uncomfortable, over taking a chance on the unknown.

When fear gets in the way of making healthy changes, we talk to fear, inviting it along with us on our course of action. Getting to know fear allows us to ask it for a gift: the courage to walk with fear by our side and learn from it as we go. It allows us to learn which fear is blocking our progress and which fear is healthy - cautioning us against actions that might be harmful.

What fear might I make a friend of today?

One of my long time running fears has been hungry and running out of food. I know my God provides and He has many times. I will have to process this and do some praying and have a little talk with my God.

[MajestyJo]

Tuesday, May 20, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

For nothing can be sole or whole that has not been rent.
—W. B. Yeats

The maple out front is young and healthy, but it grows in the shape of a Y. Neighborhood tree experts have warned that as it grows, it will split in half as the weight of the two main branches pull down against each other. One of these two beautiful branches, already lush with new leaves, must be cut. But once pruned, the remaining branch will straighten as it reaches for the sun. It will grow faster, and the whole tree will live many years longer - all by cutting it back today.

Sometimes we are like this tree. We go in too many directions, and can't seem to do any one thing well. When this happens, we need to give something up, to choose which direction we want and stick with it. The results will be well worth the price.

What is holding me back from growth?

The slogan "First Things First." Don't question the program, it works when I work for it. Without my recovery, I have nothing, and my family and friends don't have me either.

When I have growing pains, I try to get back to basics. Look at what I have allowed to get in my way and take up my time and steered me in a different path. Will it take me where I need to be, or do I have to turn around, check at the Steps I took or didn't take, and talk to my sponsor. If you don't have one, I suggest you get one.

[MajestyJo]

Wednesday, May 21, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

Who will tell whether one happy moment of love or the joy of breathing or walking on a bright morning and smelling the fresh air, is not worth all the suffering and effort which life implies. . . .
—Erich Fromm

A robin comes alive by breaking out of its shell. The small bird struggles to break out of the safety of the blue egg. Once out, it struggles to grow, slowly learning how to eat, walk, and fly.

We, too, struggle as we grow. There is brokenness in all of our lives - broken hearts and broken dreams. Yet these experiences open our way to a world of growing. We find comfort in the presence of a Power greater than ourselves in the same way a baby bird finds warmth near the body of its mother. We, too, can grow stronger every day, learning to take in nourishment and trying out our new wings.

What struggles have made me as strong as I am today?

For me it has been learning to live with five different types of arthritis, and not abuse my medication, and not go back into narcotics that would make the pain go away. Several doctors over the years, have told me that in order to get rid of my tremon disorder in my left hand was to pick up a glass of alcohol. Now it is in both hands, using is not an option. As I was told in treatment, the body manufactures the pain to tell you that you need more.

[MajestyJo]

Thursday, May 22, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

If it's sanity you're after, there's no recipe like laughter.
—Henry Rutherford Elliot

A smile is the earliest form of communication. A human infant smiles in the first few weeks of life. As the child grows, it learns how to turn the smile into a laugh - a joyous response reflecting pleasure.

A sense of humor, a feeling of fun, and an ability to laugh are all signs of emotional maturity. Healthy laughter frees us; it is the sunshine that makes life's shadows interesting. When we develop the ability to see the humor in a situation, we gain the ability to handle it.

We were born with smiles. They are as much a part of us as our teeth and hair. Polished and cared for, our smiles can grow into a sense of humor that will help us through the painful times.

How can I turn troubles into smiles today?

I had to learn to laugh at myself and look at my actions and decisions I took to get me to where I am in today. Most times I am my own worst enemy.

[MajestyJo]

Friday, May 23, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

The prayer of the chicken hawk does not get him the chicken.
—Swahili Proverb

Imagine flying high over the grassy plains searching with piercing eyes for dinner down below. The sun is warm on our backs as we catch the heated updrafts and rest, always watching, always praying, that dinner will be provided for the little ones back in the nest.

Dinner will be provided, of that the hawk is sure. It has faith. But the faith and the prayer will not put the chicken in its talons. It is going to have to keep looking, and, when it spots the prey, its wings will fold back, and its sleek body will plummet out of the sky. It will brake quickly with broad wings and clasp the unsuspecting supper on the fly.

Like the hawk, once we have prayed, we must get to work. Our goal isn't going to be done for us. We can pray for the strength and wisdom we will need to get it done, and that prayer will be answered. But, as the hawk knows, it's up to us to do the work.

What is my goal today, and my first step toward it?

Invite my God into my day and ask for what I need to stay clean and sober in today. First things first, my recovery, without it I don't have me.

It mentions the "Hawk" and Jamie Sams says it is the Messenger. I ask for 'Hawk Medicine' to help me carry the message to the Alcoholic/Addict who still suffers.

D. J. Conway says:

Clear-sightedness, being observant. Far memory or calling for a spiritual message of omens and dreams. Overcoming problems, taking advantage of an opportunity. Courage, defense, wisdom, illumination, new life, creativity, truth, experience. Getting a larger over-view so you can make better decisions.

[MajestyJo]

Saturday, May 24, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

Spring does not ask an audience, but shapes each blossom perfectly, indifferent to applause.
—Joan Walsh Anglund

In the spring each blossom brings its own shape, color, and fragrance. The lilacs come early to spread their lavender splash. Apple trees burst into white, cherry blossoms into pink, and each weaves its unique and pleasant perfume.

They don't bloom because someone told them to, or because they will receive anything in return. They bloom for the pure joy of blooming. They bloom because that is what they are here to do.

Each one of us blooms in our own time, with our own color and fragrance. Every one of us is a special and important blossom, and we are all part of the tree of life.

How will my day today help me grow?

Keep my committments, and for me, if I cannot make it, then I phone to postpone or cancel. Respecting others, I am NOT the only one. I feel like being late, I am disrespectful. One of my pet peeves because of this is going to my doctors and waiting an hour to get into see him. It took a little more work on the issue, when I went in and it said if you were 10 min. late for your appointment, it would be cancelled and you would have to rebook.

When I look at where I was and where I am in today, I see growth. That does not mean that I do not have to pull some weeds, add a little fertizer, and nurture myself, by giving my body, mind, and spirit the food it needs and a little watering, to get rid of the old to make room for the new.

[MajestyJo]

Sunday, May 25, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

Do we really know anybody? Who does not wear one face to hide another?
—Francis Marion

A woman in her fifties watched her mother in her eighties struggle against the wrinkles in her face and neck, trying to hide them, pretend they weren't there. She wanted her mother to accept that she was getting older but found her unwilling to listen.

Haven't we all run into this situation? We can learn so much just by remembering that what is right for one person may not be right for another, and others are entitled to decide how they want to behave. Often, we are just worried about ourselves, concerned, for instance, with our own ability to age gracefully. We don't need someone else to do it for us. We can take care of ourselves.

What do I worry about in another that I can take care of in myself?

The nice thing about recovery, we don't have to hide behind masks. With me what you see is what you get. If you met me in person, you would see the person you read about on the site. As I said to my friend Bert today, "We aren't too bad for a couple of 72 year olds.
:D

As they say, "If you find yourself pointing a finger at someone, you have three coming back at you." I try not to do this any more, got tired of doing so much work on myself. I learned whatI saw in others, was a reflection from with in me, be it positive or negative.

My worry in today is that my son will not choose recovery. He has no connection to God, and I pray that he finds the way. All I can do is pray, for him and for me.

[MajestyJo]

Monday, May 26, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

An oak and a reed were arguing about their strength. When a strong wind came up, the reed avoided being uprooted by bending and leaning with the gusts of wind. But the oak stood firm and was torn up by the roots.
—Aesop

Within each of us, as in the reed and the oak, is a single characteristic, which is both our strongest and weakest trait. The bending which keeps the reed alive makes it weak, we might think. Some of us see both sides of every argument and are good team players, fair judges, and compassionate friends. But like the reed - always bending to the needs of others - we may never know what we want or who we are.

Some of us believe we are like the oak: strong and tough and successful in the face of most difficulty. But we may never learn to accept flaws in ourselves.

We are wise to remember that no trait is strong or weak, but we make it so by how we use it. We can use our strength to stand straight in the face of hardship, and we can use our strength to bend.

What is my strongest and weakest trait?

Foregiveness and letting go the weakest and my strongest would be empathy, knowing and accepting where others and myself are coming from. I have been told over the years that I am a strong woman. The strength doesn't come from me, it is only through my God that all things are possible.

[MajestyJo]

Tuesday, May 27, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

If your life is ever going to get better, you'll have to take risks. There is simply no way you can grow without taking chances.
—David Viscott

One sunny day a caterpillar who was afraid of the dark came to a tunnel, which lay squarely in its path. It had a choice of going back where it started, or summoning the courage to crawl into the darkness. "What shall I do?" wondered the caterpillar. "If I go back home, I won't get where I want to go, but I'm so afraid!"

Just then, a voice called out from the tunnel. "I can hear you, Mr. Caterpillar. I am Mr. Beetle. I am here in the tunnel and I can see the other end. If you come through, you won't lose your fear of the dark, but you will get where you want to go."

We are all like the caterpillar once in a while. But if we let our fear stop us from doing things, which are necessary to our growth, we will never realize what courage we really have.

Is my fear a necessary part of new experiences?

I know there are healthy fears. I don't walk in from of a bus and expect that my God will put His Hand down and grab me by the scruff of the neck and say, "Don't go there."

What kept me sober for the first few months, until I could detox enough to understand and work the program, was fear of going back to where I came from. I didn't want to detox again. I didn't want to stand in the way of my son's addiction, I had to let go and let His God lead and guide him. I had to realize I was not his Higher Power, and live and let live.

Every once in a while, I have trouble grasping onto hope, and fear he will dies as a result of his disease. I had to realize it was his choice, and I didn't have the power to change him. All I could do was work my own program and lead by example.

It was a real risk to ask him to leave and he ended up in shelters and was homeless. I feared that I was a bad mom, but I needed to practice tough love. It is not easy to be a good member of Al-Anon and a mother too.

[MajestyJo]

Wednesday, May 28, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

Though we travel the world over to find the beautiful, we must carry it with us or we find it not.
—Ralph Waldo Emerson

The little rabbit stood alone, watching her family and friends hop and skip about her in the forest, playing her favorite rabbit game. Try as she might, each time she attempted to join in, she tripped about awkwardly. When this happened, the other rabbits laughed uproariously at her and called her "Grace." Soon even she forgot her real name. But in the moments when Grace was alone, she danced around the trees with ease. She was as smooth and graceful as any ballerina. An old owl sat high above her one night, watching her intently. The moonlight streamed through the treetops like a soft spotlight and he sat and watched as little Grace moved in and out of the moonbeams. Finally he said, "Grace, you are more graceful than any creature I've ever seen." Grace was startled that someone had been watching her, but listened carefully to the wise owl's words as he continued. "You have carried this beauty within you all the time, but locked it inside when you tried too hard." If we remember to relax and trust in ourselves, we, too, will discover that we are able.

What hidden ability can I set loose today?

Some days I think they are all hiding or I lost them along the way.

What I need is to be strong, in my faith and my beliefs.

[MajestyJo]

Thursday, May 29, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

The only people who never fail are those who never try.
—Ilka Chase

A boy once asked his grandfather how he had become so happy and successful in his life. "Right decisions," replied his grandfather. The boy thought for a while and then asked a second question, "But how do you learn to make right decisions?" The grandfather answered quickly with a twinkle in his eye, "Wrong decisions!"

We, too, will learn from our "wrong decisions," our mistakes. Whenever we try anything, there is always the possibility of failure. We must learn to not let this keep us from trying. When we are willing to try, we have already conquered our fear. We can grow no matter what the outcome is.

What failure have I turned into success?

Getting involved in service. I had a lot of self-esteem issues, and as they say in the program, the best way to overcome it is to do esteem-able acts.

[MajestyJo]

Friday, May 30, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

The cut worm forgives the plow.
—William Blake

Would anyone believe that rain abuses grass, or accuse roots, hungry for a better hold on life, of digging too far into earth's flesh? And if the earth should have to quake, would anyone blame it for cracking here and there? Look closely at the small world of busy life overturned in the garden each spring. No ant there curses another bug, and no worm curses itself. Though they can neither speak nor think, even small creatures know enough to accept their pain as a natural part of life.

Why, then, should we waste time blaming others, or ourselves, for the natural sensations of life?

In the process of new growth, can we expect no pain?

Heard it first at AA, "No pain, no gain." I think we have growing pains, as we go through change. It is a process not a quick fix.

As I have said many times, "Today thanks to the 12 Steps and the Fellowship(s), and because I changed and have a choice about picking up the tools of recovery, which helps me to deal with life on life's terms.

Our emotional, mental, and spiritual pain can come out physically, and visa versa.

[MajestyJo]

Saturday, May 31, 2014

You are reading from the book Today's Gift

It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye.
--Antoine de St. Exupery

A tuning fork is a small tool that is used to tune musical instruments. It is tapped softly and then set down. As it vibrates, it gives off a musical tone. When its vibrations perfectly match the vibrations of the note played on the instrument, the instrument is in tune. When the note matches the tuning fork, this can be both felt and heard.

Our hearts work like a tuning fork. When the heart feels completely in tune with a decision or thought or action in our lives, then we know it is the right one for us. We can actually feel the harmony inside our bodies.

Sometimes what we know deep in our hearts gets clouded over by doubts and questions and other people's opinions and judgments. We need to clear away such clouds and listen to our hearts, for our hearts carry the wisdom of God.

Am I in tune with my heart today?

Like to think I am coming from my heart not my head. They say the longest journey in recovery is from the head to the heart.

When they were putting monitors on my at the sleep disorder clinic last night, the technician said, "We will listen and test your heart." For once, I didn't say it, just thought it, "I'm not sure I have one." :(