Thought For Today - October

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Get What You Give

What you give is what you get.

The quality of energy that ripples out from us is likely to return in a similar form. It might not be from the same place or the same person but you get back what you give out from somewhere. So if you don't like what you're getting, check what you're giving. Check your attitude, intentions, and feelings. Now get prepared to change the quality of the energy you give.

Give. The more you give, the more you get.

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Can't Hear Yourself Think?

Can you hear yourself think? We're thinking thousands of thoughts throughout the day. But our world is noisy, our life is loud, and when we do get a quiet moment, we're watching, listening, reading, scanning.... it's no wonder we can't hear ourselves think.

We don't need noise-cancelling devices. We don't need to get away from the noise. We just need to talk less and be a little more quiet. Then no matter where we are, we’ll hear ourselves think.

Hear yourself think and you'll make better choices about which thoughts to listen to.

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The Dextify Response

When you’re in the middle of a difficult conversation and you’re being challenged, it’s so easy to dextify, Defend, EXplain and jusTIFY!

Of course, there’s a time to defend, explain and justify. But most often, dextifying is not the best response. It almost always sounds like you’re making excuses and it just digs you into a deeper hole.

So before you dextify, pause to consider a) if there is some truth to what the other person is saying, b) the most appropriate response. Maybe give a little explanation or say, “Thank you. I'll look into it.”

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The Happiness Decision

Happiness is not a dependency. You don’t actually need anything to be happy. It’s not something that comes from outside. Happiness is a decision. Decide to be happy now.

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Making It Easy

Where there is love, even a task as difficult and as big as a mountain becomes as easy and light as cotton wool. Love makes work easier and lighter because you’ll always want to give your best.

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Interesting or Interested?

We want people to find us interesting. But what you’ll most probably find is that the more interested you are in others, the more interesting you are to others.

Approach your interactions and conversations with more interest in what others have to say; their stories, viewpoints, experiences, hobbies, travels…. Be interested and you’ll be more interesting.

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The Conscience Bites

We all know that moment when our conscience 'bites'. There's a sense that we haven't done the 'right' thing. The conscience 'bites' not to make us feel guilty but to nudge us to put things 'right'.

The next time your conscience 'bites', avoid the guilt trip. Instead let your conscience nudge you to make amends and do the 'right' thing.

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Are You Sending Too Many Emails?

Do you send too many emails to too many people? How about, think first, email second.

Think before you hit the ‘Reply All’ or the ‘Forward’ button, or send a group email. Do I really need to send this email? Is it going to the right people? Would it be easier or better to pick up the phone, speak face to face or arrange a meeting?

Try not to clog up other people’s inbox with too many emails. Send emails mindfully.

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Detachment, Understood

Detachment is often misunderstood. It's often seen as being disconnected or disengaged.

Detachment means to not allow the negativity of a relationship, an event or even myself to overwhelm me. Detachment means that I am separate from the relationship, the event and even my own negativities. Detachment enables me to attach myself to who I am - I am love.

Detach with love and you'll connect and engage more positively.

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Saying Yes or No

Are you quick to say ‘yes’ to everyone and everything? Yes. No wonder you’re feeling frazzled and fried!

Try slowing down the quick ‘yes’ response. Slow down to choose wisely when to say 'yes' or 'no'. Make the choice and then say it and mean it.

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Soul at Work

The soul is the deepest aspect of the self from which creativity, intuition, caring, compassion, meaning and purpose flow. Bring all of you to work – your body, heart and soul. Integrate and align who you are, what you do and what you value.

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THINK

Are you able to think short-term and long-term at the same time?

Manage short-term pressures and create space for thinking about the long-term.

Thinking ahead is about being prepared for the opportunities that might await and the challenges that might emerge.

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Slow Your Impatience

The person walking or driving in front of you is slow..... The person you're working with is slow..... Are you impatient with people who are slow? Does your impatience move people faster? Actually, impatience creates more stress and sometimes it slows the other person even more.

The next time you encounter people who are slow, slow your impatience. Make allowances for the fact that other people have different rhythms to you. Slow your stress and take this opportunity to move more slowly.

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Wrapped Up in the Stories

All too often we get wrapped up in all the different stories going on in our lives, and easily loose perspective.

Every now and then, unwrap yourself from the stories. Close the book. Take a deep breath and let a bit of quiet calm wrap around your mind.

Then, whenever you're ready, feel free to pick up the book and carry on. Who knows, you may even have a different perspective on the stories going on in your life.

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What Are You Avoiding?

What are you avoiding right now? Some feedback you have been given, an early night, eating more healthily. Sometimes, we avoid what’s best for us.

Ask yourself: 1) If I keep avoiding, how will this affect my life in the weeks, months and years ahead? 2) If I stop avoiding and do what’s best for me, how will my life improve?

If you're going to avoid something, avoid avoidance! Do what you are avoiding and put yourself on the right track to be your best.

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Is Excitement Happiness?

Is excitement the same thing as happiness? Excitement is a positive emotion that makes us feel alive, but excitement doesn’t always last, it tends to wear off. Enjoy the happiness that comes from excitement, but understand that true happiness is not the same thing as excitement.

Happiness is constant and ever-lasting; it doesn't come from a stimulation or a thrill. Happiness is more than a positive emotion; it's a state of being.

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Team Together

When we're working in a team, it's easy to put all the responsibility on the team leader. But we're all responsible!

If we all take responsibility for not just the task, but also for working better together and creating a positive team environment, we'd have greater success.

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Cool Anger

When there’s a fire, the most urgent thing to do is to try to put the flames out, not worry about how the fire started. In the same way, when someone’s angry, instead of adding fuel to the fire and making things worse or heating up and getting angry yourself – put out the fire. Become cool and create ‘cooling thoughts.’ ‘Cool’ the other person down by sending them good vibrations and good feelings.

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How to Use Your Ears?

An ant is tiny. An elephant is huge. But if an ant enters the ear of an elephant, the tiny ant makes the elephant go crazy. In the same way, if we allow negativity to enter our ears, our behavior is affected. Be very, very selective in what you allow to enter your ears. Don’t forget, you have 2 ears, so listen with one ear and let negativity out of the other.

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Tip for Disruptive Thoughts

When disruptive thoughts disturb you or interfere with your focus, try this simple tip: interrupt.

Interrupt your disruptive thoughts. Interrupt with calm, constructive thoughts. Interrupt to create smarter better results.

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Making Your Own Decisions

Do you make your own decisions? Think again, because you may be surprised just how much we look to others to make our decisions.

Of course it’s useful to look to others for advice, perspective, insight… but look to yourself to make the final decision. At the end of the day it’s your life and only you know the most about you and your situation. So trust yourself to make your own decisions.

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Life’s Musical Chairs

Life often feels like a game of musical chairs.

Just when you get comfortable with where you live, work or the people in your life, things change.

You know the rules, when the music starts, you have to get off your chair and move. No point lingering in front of a chair! No point worrying about what happens next. You may as well, keep moving till you hear the music stop, and enjoy the anticipation and the excitement of finding the next chair.

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Peace Takeaway

Sometimes it seems as if someone or something can so easily take away our peace. But actually no one and nothing can take away our peace, because peace is our natural state of being.

So when it feels like someone or something has taken away your peace, understand that you just got pulled away from your peace. Then pull your attention away from everything else and return back to your natural state of peace.

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36 Hour Weekend

Between 6pm Friday and 6am Monday there’s 60 hours. Let’s say you sleep for 24 of those hours, even then you have 36 hours. What do you do in those 36 hours? How will you make the most of your 36 hours?

Here are a few suggestions: Do something relaxing to recover from the week. Do something fun and different to rejuvenate yourself. Make time for people who matter. Make time for solitude and introspection. And most importantly, avoid doing too many chores over the weekend; maybe get some chores done on one or two weekday evenings.

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The Present Moment

When the mind continuously dwells on the past, we miss out on the opportunities of the present. So, if you’re still thinking about something you don’t need to be thinking about – stop! Remind yourself: time is too precious to waste on time-wasting thoughts. Become present and take the opportunity to use the present moment well.

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Respectful Assertiveness

When a conversation becomes heated, can you respond warmly? When giving your opinion, can you express yourself without anxiety? Assertiveness is our ability to convey thoughts and feelings in ways that can be clearly heard; whilst maintaining our personal integrity, as well as respect for others.

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Like the Autumn Leaves

Autumn is the season of letting go. As the wind begins to blow, the leaves on the trees begin to turn, twist, fall and float to the ground.

Like the autumn leaves, we too need to let go of all that is no longer relevant.

This autumn, what will you let go of?

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The Problem behind the Problem

When a problem arises, it’s essential to fix the immediate problem, but, as soon as you can, solve the problem behind the problem. If we don’t, we’re likely to end up with the same or a similar problem, again and again.

Make the time to look for the underlying issues that led to the problem. Then work out how you can fix the problem behind the problem.

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Face on Auto-Response

Are your facial expressions on auto response?

When surprised, do you automatically raise your eyebrows; when worried, does your forehead crunch up; when upset, do your lips fall into a frown? Maybe your auto response is on smile or on neutral – no facial expression at all?

Not only do your facial expressions inform others of what you are feeling but they also impact people’s perception of you. So recognize your automatic facial responses and choose what you express and inform.

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Small Achievements

Big achievements get all the attention; it’s the small ones that go unnoticed.

Honor other people’s achievements, no matter how small. This adds fuel to their motivation and also communicates that they, and what they do matters.

Put a congratulations note on the fridge door, acknowledge the achievement in a meeting, or celebrate the small success with chocolates, ice cream, cakes…. How will you honor the small accomplishments of those around you?

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Be Here

Are you here, or is your mind somewhere else? We all know the feeling of being here, in the moment. You may have experienced it when gardening, playing sports, fixing something....

If your mind is somewhere else, bring it back. Be here, in the moment, and you’re more likely to experience calm, respond to life thoughtfully and take delight in everyday activities.