Daily Practice - June
 

June 1

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 64-65-
Ch 5- How It Works:
Resentment is the "number one" offender. It destroys more alcoholics than anything else. From it stem all forms of spiritual disease, for we have been not only mentally and physically ill, we have been spiritually sick. When the spiritual malady is overcome, we straighten out mentally and physically. In dealing with resentments, we set them on paper. We listed people, institutions or principles with whom we were angry. We asked ourselves why we were angry. In most cases it was found that our self-esteem, our pocketbooks, our ambitions, our personal relationships
(including sex) were hurt or threatened. So we were sore. We were "burned up."
On our grudge list we set opposite each name our injuries. Was it our self-esteem, our security, our ambitions, our personal, or sex relations, which had been interfered with?

-Tom- doing my 4th Step under the guidance of my sponsor and the format of the directions in the BB, was one of the greatest things I had ever done in my life.
Many times on many occasions in my life, I had said to myself “why did I do that?” or “why did I act that way? Most of the time I did not really know why.
My information that I plugged into the 4th Step format, gave me all my “why’s” and that was critical for me.
For most of my life I just thought I was a rotten, damaged, mean, no good, son of a *****. While some of my actions said that was true, inside, it was not. I was just sick; spiritually, mentally and physically.
Today I pray that I remember to focus my efforts on my spiritual malady first, then mental and physical.

June 2

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 103-
Ch 7- Working With Others:
We are careful never to show intolerance or hatred of drinking as an institution. Experience shows that such an attitude is not helpful to anyone. Every new alcoholic looks for this spirit among us and is immensely relieved when he finds we are not witch burners. A spirit of intolerance might repel alcoholics whose lives could have been saved, had it not been for such stupidity. We would not even do the cause of temperate drinking any good, for not one drinker in a thousand likes to be told anything about alcohol by one who hates it.
Some day we hope that Alcoholics Anonymous will help the public to a better realization of the gravity of the alcoholic problem, but we shall be of little use if our attitude is one of bitterness or hostility. Drinkers will not stand for it.
After all, our problems were of our own making. Bottles were only a symbol. Besides, we have stopped fighting anybody or anything. We have to!

-Tom- My sponsor would always say “it’s easy to be Sober in an AA meeting. The real question is what is my attitude and how do I behave outside of the meetings? Am I a good example of a member of Alcoholics Anonymous when no other AA member is around?”
I can ask myself, have I stopped fighting everybody and everything?
If your answer is yes, then Continue to enjoy the the Fruits of doing Steps 10,11,12.
If your answer is no, then stop what you are doing, write a Gratitude list and get with your sponsor and revisit steps 10 and 11.
I pray that today I am Given the ability to be a solid member of Alcoholics Anonymous, in attitude, word and deed.

June 3

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 31-
Ch 3- More About Alcoholism:
Here are some of the methods we have tried: Drinking beer only, limiting the number of drinks, never drinking alone, never drinking in the morning, drinking only at home, never having it in the house, never drinking during business hours, drinking only at parties, switching from scotch to brandy, drinking only natural wines, agreeing to resign if ever drunk on the job, taking a trip, not taking a trip, swearing off forever (with and without a solemn oath), taking more physical exercise, reading inspirational books, going to health farms and sanitariums, accepting voluntary commitment to asylums-we could increase the list ad infinitum.

-Tom- My sponsor asked me if I had ever tried any of these methods? I said yes, most of them and some that were not on that particular list.
He asked me does your drinking cause problems for you in your life? I said yes, pretty much any major problems going on in my life are because of what happens when I drink?
He asked, then why don’t you just stop drinking?
I said at first I didn’t stop because I didn’t want to, now it’s because I can’t stop.
He said, that’s because alcohol is not your problem, it’s your only solution, so when you stop drinking you are stopping your solution and are only left with your problem.
Made logical sense to me.
Today I pray for the ability to seek the Solution for my problem, which is found in The Program and The Fellowship of A.A.

June 4

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 66-
Ch 5- How It Works:
It is plain that a life which includes deep resentment leads only to futility and unhappiness. To the precise extent that we permit these, do we squander the hours that might have been worth while. But with the alcoholic, whose hope is the maintenance and growth of a spiritual experience, this business of resentment is infinitely grave. We found that it is fatal. For when harboring such feelings we shut ourselves off from the sunlight of the Spirit. The insanity of alcohol returns and we drink again. And with us, to drink is to die.
If we were to live, we had to be free of anger. The grouch and the brainstorm were not for us. They may be the dubious luxury of normal men, but for alcoholics these things are poison.

-Tom- my sponsor asked me “is it plain to you that a life which includes deep resentment leads only to futility and unhappiness?”
I said “what does futility mean? He said it means pointless or useless.
I said well my driving force for the majority of my success was based off of anger, rage, resentment and revenge. Those were things that worked for me and gave me purpose, Power and control.
He said “yes that was true and worked for you in the past, but is it working for you now?”
I said, no, I am just mad all the time, have to get drunk, and then hurt people that I Love, then have to get drunk again.
So he asked me the question again “is it plain to you that your life which includes deep resentment leads only to futility and unhappiness?”
Then I said “yes, it is plain to me, that is True.
But I don’t know what else to do or how to live any other way”
He said, “that’s ok. The reason we are reading this book and following the Directions is so that you will have a different way to Live, without drinking”
I can ask myself “ am I following the Directions in the BB and attempting to Live differently?”
If your answer is yes, then Continue walking down the Broad Highway.
If your answer is no, then understand that there is no mystery in why it won’t work. If we want something different, we have to do something different.

June 5

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 153-
Ch- A Vision For You:
It may seem incredible that these men are to become happy, respected, and useful once more. How can they rise out of such misery, bad repute and hopelessness? The practical answer is that since these things have happened among us, they can happen with you. Should you wish them above all else, and be willing to make use of our experience, we are sure they will come. The age of miracles is still with us. Our own recovery proves that!
Our hope is that when this chip of a book is launched on the world tide of alcoholism, defeated drinkers will seize upon it, to follow its suggestions. Many, we are sure, will rise to their feet and march on. They will approach still other sick ones and fellowships of Alcoholics Anonymous may spring up in each city and hamlet, havens for those who must find a way out.

-Tom- As my sponsor and I read through these important paragraphs, a few items stood out
1- Should you wish them above ALL else, and be Willing to make use of our Experience, we are Sure they will come.
2. Defeated drinkers will seize upon it, to follow its suggestions.
So I have to be defeated by Alcoholism and then put my sobriety above everything else in my Life, if I want to obtain and maintain my sobriety.
That’s The Deal. Anything short of that will not work for me and I suspect it will not work for you either, if you are like me.
I pray that today I have the Courage to put my sobriety first, above everything else in my Life.

June 6

Practice for the day-
BB pg 62-63,
Ch 5- How it Works:
(some of the 3rd step promises)
“This is the how and why of it. First of all, we had to quit playing God. It didn’t work. Next, we decided that hereafter in this drama of life, God was going to be our Director. He is the Principal; we are His agents. He is the Father, and we are His children. Most good ideas are simple, and this concept was the keystone of the new and triumphant arch through which we passed to freedom.
When we sincerely took such a position, all sorts of remarkable things followed. We had a new Employer. Being all powerful, He provided what we needed, if we kept close to Him and performed His work well. Established on such a footing we became less interested in ourselves, our little plans and designs. More and more we became interested in seeing what we could contribute to life. As we felt new power flow in, as we enjoyed peace of mind, as we discovered we could face life successfully, as we became conscious of His presence, we began to lose our fear of today, tomorrow or the hereafter.
We were reborn.”

Tom- I can look at these promises and ask myself “are these occurring in my Life, right now?” If the answer is yes, then I Continue. If the answer is no, then I must stop and
re-position myself, do some work on me and my attitude, then Continue.
Salvation is Free, Sobriety is not- it must be worked for on a daily basis.
Today I pray for the Strength to Do my work in AA

June 8

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 154-155-
Ch 11-A Vision For You
Of course he couldn’t drink, but why not sit hopefully at a side table, a bottle of ginger ale before him? After all, had he not been sober for six months now? Perhaps he could handle, say, three drinks—no more! Fear gripped him. He was on thin ice. Again it was that old, insidious, insanity—that first drink. With a shiver he turned away and walked down the lobby to the church directory. Music and gay chatter still floated to him from the bar.
But what about his responsibilities—his family and the men who would die because they would not know how to get well, ah—yes, those other alcoholics? There must be many such in this town. He would phone a clergyman. His sanity returned and he thanked God. Selecting a church at random from the directory, he stepped into a booth and lifted the receiver.

-Tom- Remember there was no AA in this part of the story. Bill searched the churches for drunks, then helped them. The one he found ended up being Dr Bob.
I remember wanting to stay sober so so bad, and then got drunk. So wanting to didn’t work.
I remember Needing to stay sober for an event, deadline, job or special family occasion, but got drunk. So Needing to stay sober didn’t work.
So wanting and needing to stay sober didn’t keep me sober.
What keeps me sober is DOING the things that sober alcoholics in AA do, no matter how I feel. It was a relief to me to know I didn’t have to feel like doing it or wanting to do it, I just had to do it and as a byproduct, I would stay sober.
Today I pray that I have the Courage to Trust in my God, clean my house and help others.

June 8

Practice of the day-
BB pg 164
Ch-A Vision For You:
Still you may say: “But I will not have the benefit of contact with you who write this book.” We cannot be sure. God will determine that, so you must remember that your real reliance is always upon Him. He will show you how to create the fellowship you crave.*
Our book is meant to be suggestive only. We realize we know only a little. God will constantly disclose more to you and to us. Ask Him in your morning meditation what you can do each day for the man who is still sick. The answers will come, if your own house is in order. But obviously you cannot transmit something you haven’t got. See to it that your relationship with Him is right, and great events will come to pass for you and countless others. This is the Great Fact for us.

-Tom- at certain times in my Path of Sobriety, they were very lonely and the fear of not being able to stay sober long term hovered in the corners of my mind. I held the words in these paragraphs close to my Heart and Continued to Trudge and chose blind faith that they were true. Through TIME ;
T- things
I- I
M- must
E- earn
I experienced that every word was true.
I have experienced great events for me and countless others, that brought me Joy. All I have to do is make sure my Relationship with My Higher Power is in order and follow Directions.
I can ask myself, “is my relationship Right between me and my Higher Power?”
If the answer is yes, then I Continue moving down my Path.
If the answer is no, or I don’t know, then I need to stop, write a Gratitude list, talk with my sponsor and get it right.
I pray that just for today, I keep it Simple and do The Deal.

June 9

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 21
Ch 2-There is a Solution:
Here is the fellow that has been puzzling you, especially in his lack of control. He does absurd, incredible, tragic things while drinking. He is a real Dr Jekyll and Mr Hide. He is seldom mildly intoxicated. He is always more or less insanely drunk. His disposition while drinking resembles his normal nature but little. He may be one of the finest fellows in the world. Yet let him drink for a day, and he frequently becomes disgustingly, and even dangerously
anti-social. He has a positive genius for getting tight at exactly the wrong moment, particularly when some important decision must be made or engagement kept. He is often perfectly sensible and well balanced concerning everything except liquor, but in that respect he is incredibly dishonest and selfish. He often possesses special abilities, skills and aptitudes, and has a promising career ahead of him. He uses his gifts to build up a bright outlook for his family and himself, and then pulls the structure down on his head by a senseless series of sprees........

-Tom- my sponsor would often stop and ask me if I could relate to the what we read. He said it was very important because if I could not relate to what we were reading and talking about, why would I continue?
Another reason why it is important for me to relate is because I suffer from
Terminal Uniqueness.
Terminal Uniqueness requires that I cannot relate to anyone and no one or nothing can relate to me. It sounds like this “you don’t know me, you don’t understand what I’ve been through, this will never work, you just don’t get it, I am different, my issues are different than yours, I’m just too damaged.......etc”
All my life, I had looked for the “differences”, and I found them.
Sobriety taught me to discard the differences and look for the “similarities”, and I found them.
Whatever I am “looking for”, I will find.
I pray that today I look for similarities and not just pick out the differences.

June 10

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 94-
Ch 7- Working With Others:
Outline the program of action, explaining how you made a self-appraisal, how you straightened out your past and why you are now endeavoring to be helpful to him. It is important for him to realize that your attempt to pass this on to him plays a vital part in your own recovery. Actually he may be helping you more than you are helping him. Make it plain he is under no obligation to you, that you hope only that he will try to help other alcoholics when he escapes his own difficulties. Suggest how important it is that he place the welfare of other people ahead of his own. Make it clear that he is not under any pressure, that he needn’t see you again if he doesn’t want to. You should not be offended if he wants to call it off, for he has helped you more than you have helped him. If your talk has been sane, quiet and full of human understanding,
you have perhaps made a friend. Maybe you have disturbed him about the question of alcoholism. This is all to the good. The more hopeless he feels, the better. He will be more likely to follow your suggestions.

-Tom- One of the first questions my sponsor asked was “Do you want to feel better or do better?” Before I could answer him he said “your answer better be, you want to do better. Because you have been trying to feel better your whole life and look where that has gotten you.”
Ultimately, doing better is the Path to feeling better, not the other way around.
I can ask myself, am I really carrying the Message of AA to the new man, one on one?
If your answer is yes, then Continue to give that which was freely given to you and reap the rewards of those actions.
If your answer is no, then start today by taking the time and talking to a newcomer after the meeting.
I pray that today I remember what my sponsor said to me when I asked him
“ how could I ever repay you for all you have done for me?” He said,
“Give what I gave to you, to the next man in need”

June 11

Practice of the Day-
BB pg-xiii
Forward To The First Edition:
This is the Foreword as it appeared in the first printing of the first edition in 1939.
WE, OF Alcoholics Anonymous, are more than one hundred men and women who have recovered from a seemingly hopeless state of mind and body. To show other alcoholics precisely how we have recovered is the main purpose of this book. For them, we hope these pages will prove so convincing that no further authentication will be necessary. We think this account of our experiences will help everyone to better understand the alcoholic. Many do not comprehend that the alcoholic is a very sick person. And besides, we are sure that our way of living has its advantages for all.

-Tom- a few things that jump out at me:
WE- this not a me or you program, it is a We program. I have had many people and doctors say “you should.....” in AA it is about “We should....” together.
They recovered from a seemingly hopeless state of mind and body. I could absolutely relate to that and it begged the question “do I want to recover from my hopeless state of mind and body?”
If I do, then they say “to show other alcoholics PRECISELY HOW WE HAVE RECOVERED is the main purpose of this book.
So then what you are telling me is, if I choose to follow the directions in this book, precisely, I will recover from my hopeless state of mind and body?
The answer is yes, and it comes with a Life time Guarantee.
I pray that today I remember what happened to me when I tried to manage my own Life.

June 12

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 17-
Ch-2- There Is A Solution:
WE, OF ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, know thousands of men and women who were once just as hopeless as Bill. Nearly all have recovered. They have solved the drink problem.
We are average Americans. All sections of this country and many of its occupations are represented, as well as many political, economic, social, and religious backgrounds. We are people who normally would not mix. But there exists among us a fellowship, a friendliness, and an understanding which is indescribably wonderful. We are like the passengers of a great liner the moment after rescue from shipwreck when camaraderie, joyousness and democracy pervade the vessel from steerage to Captain's table. Unlike the feelings of the ship's passengers, however, our joy in escape from disaster does not subside as we go our individual ways. The feeling of having shared in a common peril is one element in the powerful cement which binds us. But that in itself would never have held us together as we are now joined.
The tremendous fact for every one of us is that we have discovered a common solution. We have a way out on which we can absolutely agree, and upon which we can join in brotherly and harmonious action. This is the great news this book carries to those who suffer from alcoholism.

-Tom- In AA we say that everything we do are just suggestions. The funny thing is, they are the only suggestions we offer.
And why is that? Because for 86 years, all over the globe, Millions of people have recovered using this prescription for sobriety:
1-the planned program of recovery with precise clear cut directions to follow.
2-the Power of The Fellowship.
This prescription for untreated alcoholism and drug addiction is guaranteed to work, if Practiced on a daily basis.
If you are a Alcoholic/addict like me, it’s a good deal.
Give it a shot, hell, try and prove it wrong.
I dare you.
I pray that today I am Given the Strength to Live my Life to the fullest.

June 13

Practice of the Day-
BB pg-62-
Ch-5- How It Works:
Selfishness-self-centeredness! That, we think, is the root of our troubles. Driven by a hundred forms of fear, self-delusion, self-seeking, and self-pity, we step on the toes of our fellows and they retaliate. Sometimes they hurt us, seemingly without provocation, but we invariably find that at some time in the past we have made decisions based on self which later placed us in a position to be hurt.
So our troubles, we think, are basically of our own making. They arise out of ourselves, and the alcoholic is an extreme example of self-will run riot, though he usually doesn't think so. Above everything, we alcoholics must be rid of this selfishness. We must, or it kills us! God makes that possible. And there often seems no way of entirely getting rid of self without His aid. Many of us had moral and philosophical convictions galore, but we could not live up to them even though we would have liked to. Neither could we reduce our self-centeredness much by wishing or trying on our own power. We had to have God's help.

-Tom- I can relate to the Truth of those paragraphs, completely.
However, at the beginning I had to have my sponsor point it out for me because of that one line “though he usually doesn’t think so.”
We talked about it, wrote about it and talked about it some more. When I finally realized how selfish and self-centered I truly was, especially when I was pretending to be generous just to get what I wanted, it was very overwhelming and hurt a lot.
My sponsor said “all of that is too big for us to deal with, that is why we go to our Higher Power with it all and just keep moving through the Steps.”
If my problem is with other people, places and things, I’m pretty screwed.
If my problem is me, then that’s something we can work on.
I pray that today I remember to keep my finger pointed at my problem, which is me, and then get to work on the Solution.

June 14

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 50-
Ch 4- We Agnostics:
In our personal stories you will find a wide variation in the way each teller approaches and conceives of the Power which is greater than himself. Wether we agree with a particular approach or conception seems to make little difference. Experience has taught us that these are matters about which, for our purpose, we need not be worried.
On one proposition, however, these men and women are strikingly agreed. Everyone of them has gained access to, and believes in, a Power greater than himself. This Power has in each case accomplished the miraculous, the humanly impossible. As a celebrated American statesman put it “let’s look at the record.”

-Tom- it was relieving to know that I did not have to solve my alcoholism. I just had to find My own Higher Power, and He solved the problem. All I had to do was the Step work and follow the directions of my Sponsor.
The Process of doing and practicing all 12 Steps, removes the parts of my self concept that no longer serve me or support the Life I am attempting to live today.
I pray that today I have the Willingness to do the work that is necessary to acquire a conscious contact with my Higher Power, and allow Him to solve my problem.

June 15

Practice of the Day-
BB pg -132-
Ch 9- The Family Afterwards:
We have been speaking to you of serious, sometimes tragic things. We have been dealing with alcohol in its worst aspect. But we aren't a glum lot. If newcomers could see no joy or fun in our existence, they wouldn't want it. We absolutely insist on enjoying life. We try not to indulge in cynicism over the state of the nations, nor do we carry the world's troubles on our shoulders. When we see a man sinking into the mire that is alcoholism, we give him first aid and place what we have at his disposal. For his sake, we do recount and almost relive the horrors of our past. But those of us who have tried to shoulder the entire burden and trouble of others find we are soon overcome by them.
So we think cheerfulness and laughter make for usefulness. Outsiders are sometimes shocked when we burst into merriment over a seemingly tragic experience out of the past. But why shouldn't we laugh? We have recovered, and have been given the power to help others.

-Tom- it is an important reminder to know that this chapter is after doing Steps 1-12 and adopting our Design for Living, on a daily basis.
It also reminds me that when I am helping others, I am only giving them first aid. I am not a savior, surgeon or saint. I am there to place what I have at their disposal. Which is my experience, my strength and my hope. It is up to them to pick up the simple kit of tools, laid at their feet, and use them.
It is also a reminder that if I try shoulder their entire burden and troubles, I will soon be overcome by them.
Which defeats the entire Purpose of staying sober and helping others to achieve sobriety.
I pray that today the Light of my Freedom from bondage of self, shines into the Hearts of others.

June 16

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 132-133-
Ch-9- The Family Afterward:
Everybody knows that those in bad health, and those who seldom play, do not laugh much. So let
each family play together or separately, as much as their circumstances warrant. We are sure God wants us to be happy, joyous, and free. We cannot subscribe to the belief that this life is a vale of tears, though it once was just that for many of us. But it is clear that we made our own misery. God didn't do it. Avoid then, the deliberate manufacture of misery, but if trouble comes, cheerfully capitalize it as an opportunity to demonstrate His omnipotence.

-Tom- The one sentence that stands out the most to me is:
“We are sure God wants us to be happy, joyous, and free.”
Notice we are talking about what God wants us to “Be” not “do”.
Being Happy is an inside job. If my happiness is dependent on you, then I will only be happy when you want me to be. That is called Co-dependency.
Being Joyous is an inside job. I can choose to be joyous. The fact that I am alive and didn’t wake up with the obsession to drink today is a joyous occasion.
Being Free. I can choose to be Free today because I have the working tools of the 12 Steps, my Higher Power, Sponsor, Purpose and the Fellowship.
I pray that today I have the Willingness to continue to trudge the Road of Happy Destiny.

June 17

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 152,153-
Ch 11- A Vision For You:
We have shown how we got out from under. You say, "Yes, I'm willing. But am I to be consigned to a life where I shall be stupid, boring and glum, like some righteous people I see? I know I must get along without liquor, but how can I? Have you a sufficient substitute?"
Yes, there is a substitute and it is vastly more than that. It is a fellowship in Alcoholics Anonymous. There you will find release from care, boredom and worry. Your imagination will be fired. Life will mean something at last. The most satisfactory years of your existence lie ahead. Thus we find the fellowship, and so will you.
"How is that to come about?" you ask. "Where am I to find these people?"
You are going to meet these new friends in your own community. Near you, alcoholics are dying helplessly like people in a sinking ship. If you live in a large place, there are hundreds. High and low, rich and poor, these are future fellows of Alcoholics Anonymous. Among them you will make lifelong friends. You will be bound to them with new and wonderful ties, for you will escape disaster together and you will
commence shoulder to shoulder your common journey. Then you will know what it means to give of yourself that others may survive and rediscover life. You will learn the full meaning of "Love thy neighbor as thyself."

-Tom- Unity, Recovery and Service are the 3 pillars of our Sobriety and what keeps everything moving forward.
Service to others is the one thing that all of us can and must, participate in.
Gracing others with my presence in a meeting is not service.
Making coffee, sweeping the floor, cleaning the bathroom, greeting people at the door, giving of your time to another for the sole benefit only to them, cutting lawns, chairing meetings, carrying water, chopping wood, starting new meetings, being a sponsor;
these are some examples of Service to Others.
Do not be confused.
Am I being of Service to others and of Service to the organization that Loved me when no one else would or could?
I pray that today I remember my Primary Purpose: to stay sober and help another alcoholic to achieve Sobriety.

June 18

Big Book pg 84-85-
Ch 6- Into Action:
(Some of the 10th Step Promises)
And we have ceased fighting anything or anyone-even alcohol. For by this time sanity will have returned. We will seldom be interested in liquor. If tempted, we recoil from it as from a hot flame. We react sanely and normally, and we will find that this has happened automatically. We will see that our new attitude toward liquor has been given us without any thought or effort on our part. It just comes! That is the miracle of it. We are not fighting it, neither are we avoiding temptation. We feel as though we had been placed in a position of neutrality-safe and protected. We have not even sworn off. Instead, the problem has been removed. It does not exist for us. We are neither cocky nor are we afraid. That is our experience. That is how we react so long as we keep in fit spiritual condition.

-Tom- After Doing Steps 1 through 8 and all the amends I could in my 9th Step, my Sponsor and I read this paragraph together. As we read, he kept stopping and asking me, “is this true in your Life, Yes or no?” To my surprise, my answer was and is , yes.
In the 2nd Step I owned my insanity: “Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity”
After fully doing Steps 1-10, to the best of my ability, I received The Miracle of Alcoholics Anonymous in the 10th Step Promise: “For by this time sanity will have returned.”
This was a Gift given to me by focusing on doing the work of each step. However there is a hook at the end: “That is how we react so long as we keep in fit spiritual condition.”
My job is to do the Work and leave the outcome of the Work to my Higher Power.
Today I pray that I remember that I can’t stay sober today, off of yesterday’s work.

June 19

Practice of the Day-
BB-pg 11-
Ch-1- Bill’s Story:
The wars which had been fought, the burnings and chicanery that religious dispute had facilitated, made me sick. I honestly doubted whether, on balance, the religions of mankind had done any good. Judging from what I had seen in Europe and since, the power of God in human affairs was negligible, the Brotherhood of Man a grim jest. If there was a Devil, he seemed the Boss Universal, and he certainly had me.
But my friend sat before me, and he made the point-blank declaration that God had done for him what he could not do for himself. His human will had failed. Doctors had pronounced him incurable. Society was about to lock him up. Like myself, he had admitted complete defeat. Then he had, in effect, been raised from the dead, suddenly taken from the scrap heap to a level of life better than the best he had ever known!
Had this power originated in him? Obviously it had not. There had been no more power in him than there was in me at the minute; and this was none at all.

-Tom- I still remember the first time I ever read those paragraphs. It had such an impact on me because I could completely relate mentally and emotionally, with experiences I had in combat and just horrible living.
Then I could also relate to the other part because I had pipe hitting WWII, Korea and Vietnam vets sitting in front of me who had been sober for years.
I listened when they shared what it was like, what happened and what it was like now. It was real and they were real and I could not evade the fact that if they could do it, I could to.
I only had to be Willing to do The Work and follow directions. Then, I might have what they had, Sobriety.
I pray that today I remember what it was like when I was hopeless and Grateful I am not there anymore.

June 20

Practice of the Day-
-AA Responsibility Statement:
I am responsible...When anyone, anywhere, reaches out for help, I want the hand of A.A. always to be there. And for that:
I am Responsible.

-Tom- After I had been working with my sponsor for a week or so, one day he said “tell me what you are Grateful for” I said I had nothing to be grateful for, all I ever cared about in my life is gone. He said, well that’s a problem. I said, I agree. He said well there is always one thing you can be grateful for Tom. I said, oh really, so what is that? He said “ you can always be forever Grateful for Alcoholics Anonymous, because no one else would have your sorry ass”
I wanted to punch him in the face, but I didn’t because it was True.
Before AA, there was only a Living Hell, jails, Institutions and Death if you were an alcoholic/addict. That was it. There was no recovery option.
I often think about, what if there was no one ready and willing to grab my hand when I finally reached out for help? I know the answer, jails, institutions, death and a living Hell.
My Higher Power and my Willingness to Do AA saved my Life, but I couldn’t have done it without my sponsor, I know that. I asked him one day, “how can I ever repay you for all you have taught me and all you have done for me?” He smiled and said “give to the next man, what I gave to you. That is the only way you can repay me”
If you are attempting to grab the hands that are reaching for help in AA, then you are on track for what was done for you. Continue.
If you are not, I suggest you re read the section above.
Today I pray that I Remember what was Freely Given to me, so that I will do same for another.

June 21

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 101-102
Ch- Working With Others:
So our rule is not to avoid a place where there is drinking, if we have a legitimate reason for being there. That includes bars, nightclubs, dances, receptions, weddings and plain ordinary whoopee parties. To a person who has had experience with an alcoholic, this may seem like tempting Providence, but it isn’t.
You will note that we made an important qualification. Therefore ask yourself on each occasion, “Have I any good social, business, or personal reason for going to this place? Or am I expecting to steal a little vicarious pleasure from the atmosphere of such places?” If you answer these questions satisfactorily, you need have no apprehension. Go or stay away, whichever seems best. But be sure you are on solid spiritual ground before you start and that your motive in going is thoroughly good. Do not think of what you will get out of the occasion. Think of what you can bring to it. But if you are shaky, you had better work with another alcoholic instead!

-Tom- it is most important to note where this information is contained in the process. These are part of the directions for the 12th step, which means that I have completed my 9th step and attempting to live 10,11, 12, on a daily basis.
In early sobriety I was too afraid to walk into the gas station to buy Copenhagen because I had never walked by a beer cooler without getting some. Later in my sobriety I would find myself sitting in crack house that had drugs, booze and guns, reading the BB with a sponsee in a rough spot. Following the directions in the above paragraphs and double checking with my sponsor.
The point is that if I follow the directions of the 12 steps and information in the BB, I can walk this earth a Free man. That is what I always wanted and still desire most, Freedom. That is why I got Sober, to Live Free.
Today I pray that I live the Life my God wants me to Live: Happy, Joyous and Free

June 23

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 86-
Ch- Into Action:
On awakening let us think about the 24 hours ahead. We consider our plans for the day. Before we begin, we ask God to direct our thinking, especially asking that it be divorced from self-pity, dishonest or self-seeking motives. Under these conditions we can employ or mental faculties with assurance, for after all God gave us brains to use. Our thought-life will be placed on a much higher plane when our thinking is cleared of wrong motives.

-Tom- this is some of the morning directions for the 11th step. It is important to actually have done all the Work in steps 1-10 to receive and obtain the full benefits of this step.
It is only here, in the 11th that I am actually given permission to think again.
Steps 1-10 just give me precise clear cut instructions on what actions to take.
Many members, especially those that have been sober a bit, just start doing what they think is best now that they have been sober a while.
When the Gift of Desperation is gone, Discipline must show up, or Desperation will return.
I am Grateful that there is no scorecard, test to take, or deep understandings to decipher. I just have to continue to follow the Good Orderly Directions of the step I am on.
I can ask myself “am I following the directions for the 11th step out of the BB?”
If the answer is yes, then I can Continue.
If the answer is no, then stop and do it. Unless you are unwilling, that’s a 1st Step issue.
(Upon awakening only takes 6 minutes in case you were wondering how to fit this practice into your busy schedule)
I pray that today I just follow the directions and don’t buy into how smart I think I am.

June 23

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 93-
Ch-7- Working With Others:
..........Stress the spiritual feature freely. If the man be agnostic or atheist, make it emphatic that he does not have to agree with your conception of God. He can choose any conception he likes, provided it makes sense to him. The main thing is that he be willing to believe in a Power greater than himself and that he live by spiritual principles.
When dealing with such a person, you had better use everyday language to describe spiritual principles. There is no use arousing any prejudice he may have against certain theological terms and conceptions about which he may already be confused. Don't raise such issues, no matter what your own convictions are.

-Tom- For me, I will be Forever Grateful that my Sponsor followed these 2 paragraphs in “working with others” when he was working with me. He was following the directions in the BB and so was I. It’s called the dumb guy approach, just do what the book says to do, when it says to do it.
My sponsor was/is a Christian. He follows the teachings of Jesus Christ and went to church. However he Never imparted his beliefs onto me, he said, like the book said, I had to find my own God. The God of the Hopeless alcoholic that would help me personally.
The reason why that was important was my head was full of all kinds of prejudice, false information and failed attempts of connecting with God. For me, just mentioning theological terms brought up an emotional fury and I would shut down without even trying to.
My sponsor said let’s approach this from a practical sense: don’t talk about AA in church and don’t talk about church in AA. Practice being where you are not bringing one into the other. Keep it simple and enjoy both.
I pray that today I have the ability to keep it simple, be where I am, allow others to be where they are and enjoy all that Sobriety has Given me.

June 24

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 50-
Ch 4- We Agnostics:
In our personal stories you will find a wide variation in the way each teller approaches and conceives of the Power which is greater than himself. Wether we agree with a particular approach or conception seems to make little difference. Experience has taught us that these are matters about which, for our purpose, we need not be worried.
On one proposition, however, these men and women are strikingly agreed. Everyone of them has gained access to, and believes in, a Power greater than himself. This Power has in each case accomplished the miraculous, the humanly impossible. As a celebrated American statesman put it “let’s look at the record.”

-Tom- it was relieving to know that I did not have to solve my alcoholism. I just had to find My own Higher Power, and He solved the problem. All I had to do was the Step work and follow the directions of my Sponsor.
The Process of doing and practicing all 12 Steps, removes the parts of my self concept that no longer serve me or support the Life I am attempting to live today.
I pray that today I have the Willingness to do the work that is necessary to acquire a conscious contact with my Higher Power, and allow Him to solve my problem.

June 25

Practice of the Day-
-AA Responsibility Statement:
I am responsible...When anyone, anywhere, reaches out for help, I want the hand of A.A. always to be there. And for that:
I am Responsible.

-Tom- After I had been working with my sponsor for a week or so, one day he said “tell me what you are Grateful for” I said I had nothing to be grateful for, all I ever cared about in my life is gone. He said, well that’s a problem. I said, I agree. He said well there is always one thing you can be grateful for Tom. I said, oh really, so what is that?
He said “ you can always be forever Grateful for Alcoholics Anonymous, because no one else would have your sorry ass”
I wanted to punch him in the face, but I didn’t because it was True.
Before AA, there was only a Living Hell, jails, Institutions and Death if you were an alcoholic/addict. That was it. There was no recovery option.
I often think about, what if there was no one ready and willing to grab my hand when I finally reached out for help?
My Higher Power and my Willingness to Do AA saved my Life, but I couldn’t have done it without my sponsor, I know that.
I asked him one day, “how can I ever repay you for all you have taught me and all you have done for me?” He smiled and said “give to the next man, what I gave to you. That is the only way you can repay me”
If you are attempting to grab the hands that are reaching for help in AA, then you are on track for what was done for you. Continue.
If you are not, I suggest you re read the section above.
Today I pray that I Remember what was Freely Given to me, so that I will do same for another.

June 26

Practice of the day-
BB pg 46-
Ch- We Agnostics:
Much to our relief, we discovered we did not need to consider another’s conception of God. Our own conception, however inadequate, was sufficient to make the approach and to effect a contact with Him. As soon as we admitted the possible existence of a Creative Intelligence, a Spirit of the Universe underlying the totality of things, we began to be possessed of a new sense of power and direction, provided we took other simple steps. We found that God does not make too hard terms with those that seek Him. To us, the Realm of the Spirit is Broad, roomy, all inclusive; never exclusive or forbidding to those who earnestly seek. It is open, we believe, to all men.

-Tom- when I first read that paragraph, it blew my mind. I had never heard anything like that before. Broad roomy, all inclusive, not hard terms, open to all. Never had I heard or thought that. I only heard/thought the opposite: narrow is the gate, if you think about it you may have well as done it, etc.
My sponsor told me to make contact with my Higher power, this is what my first approach sounded like:
“ God, I ****ing hate you and you know it. I know you don’t think much of me either, with all I have done and your people I have hurt, but I’m needing to stay sober for sure, can’t do it on my own. Don’t know how we are going to work this out, pretty sure you don’t want to help me and if you don’t , well **** you too. Amen.”
As you can see with my Experience “God does not make to hard terms with those that seek Him”.
He met me where I was; alone, afraid, angry, ashamed and hopeless.
I can ask myself “does my conception of my Higher Power fit with what I need to be Sober, Happy, Joyous and Free?” If the answer is yes, then Continue onto the 3rd step prayer.
If the answer is no, then stop and write down your own conception of your Higher Power.
AA is a place where a plumber can teach a priest, how to live.
I pray that today I remember how far I have come in my understanding and in conscious contact with My Higher Power.

June 27

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 151-152-
Ch 11- A Vision For You:
Now and then a serious drinker, being dry at the moment says, "I don't miss it at all. Feel better. Work better. Having a better time." As ex-problem drinkers, we smile at such a sally. We know our friend is like a boy whistling in the dark to keep up his spirits. He fools himself. Inwardly he would give anything to take half a dozen drinks and get away with them. He will presently try the old game again, for he isn't happy about his sobriety. He cannot picture life without alcohol. Some day he will be unable to imagine life either with alcohol or without it. Then he will know loneliness such as few do. He will be at the jumping-off place. He will wish for the end.

-Tom- My sponsor explained to me that Sobriety, AA and the 12 Steps were serious business. If I was not serious about getting sober, don’t waist my time or his with some half ass effort. He asked me if I could relate to that paragraph? I said yes.
At 62 days without drinking, only going to meetings and reading the BB by myself, I made it to my jumping-off place.
I truly did not want to drink anymore and I wanted a drink so bad I couldn’t stand it, so I jumped. I jumped 100% and then some, into The Program and Fellowship of AA.
That is the Only reason why, I am Sober today.
I can ask myself “am I happy about my sobriety?”
If your answer is yes, then Continue and help another Alcoholic to achieve sobriety.
If your answer is no, then realize you are in a dangerous spot. Write a Gratitude list, pray to your Higher Power, meet with your sponsor, do some Steps, go to a meeting and help another alcoholic to achieve sobriety. At the end of that, I guarantee you will be happy about your sobriety.
Today I pray for the Strength to practice these Principles in all of my affairs.

June 28

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 97-
Ch 7-Working With Others:
(More 12th Step Promises)
Never avoid these responsibilities, but be sure you are doing the right thing if you assume them. Helping others is the foundation stone of your recovery. A kindly act once in a while isn't enough. You have to act the Good Samaritan every day, if need be. It may mean the loss of many nights' sleep, great interference with your pleasures, interruptions to your business. It may mean sharing your money and your home, counseling frantic wives and relatives, innumerable trips to police courts, sanitariums, hospitals, jails and asylums. Your telephone may jangle at any time of the day or night. Your wife may sometimes say she is neglected. A drunk may smash the furniture in your home, or burn a mattress. You may have to fight with him if he is violent. Sometimes you will have to call a doctor and administer sedatives under his direction. Another time you may have to send for the police or an ambulance. Occasionally you will have to meet such conditions.

-Tom-When my sponsor and I read this he said that if I am doing what I am supposed to be doing in AA, these Promises will come true like all the others. It’s a package Deal.
We talked a lot about one sentence “Helping others is the foundation stone of your recovery.”
He said “do you understand what that means, it means that if you are not helping others you do not have a Foundation in Recovery. If you want a solid Foundation in recovery, then you will help others. It’s your choice and both results are Guaranteed.
Today I pray that I remember that helping others is the Foundation of my recovery and I am Given the Strength to be helpful.

June 29

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 60-61-
Ch 5- How It Works:
Being convinced, we were at Step Three, which is that we decided to turn our will and our life over to God as we understood Him. Just what do we mean by that, and just what do we do?
The first requirement is that we be convinced that any life run on self-will can hardly be a success. On that basis we are almost always in collision with something or somebody, even though our motives are good. Most people try to live by self-propulsion. Each person is like an actor who wants to run the whole show; is forever trying to arrange the lights, the ballet, the scenery and the rest of the players in his own way. If
his arrangements would only stay put, if only people would do as he wished, the show would be great. Everybody, including himself, would be pleased. Life would be wonderful. In trying to make these arrangements our actor may sometimes be quite virtuous. He may be kind, considerate, patient, generous; even modest and self-sacrificing. On the other hand, he may be mean, egotistical, selfish and dishonest. But, as with most humans, he is more likely to have varied traits.

-Tom- my sponsor and I talked a lot about this example given here.
He said, “here is the funny thing, imagine this, this actor was hired to play a part, a role in the production. He is probably pretty good at what he does because he got hired to do it. Which is great, but then he walks over to the camera guy and starts telling him how to improve his shots. Then he goes to the writer and starts giving him ideas on how to make the story better. Then he strong arms some of the lesser actors to say their part a little different. Then he sweet talks the director into changing a few scenes, because they also play golf together. Etc, etc
Eventually everything goes sideways, people get pissed and a lot of confusion ensues. Then the producer finds out who has disrupted his flow, then fires the actor.
The actor gets hurt and angry, then asks the Producer “why did you fire me? I was only trying to make the show better!”
Then the Producer says “ that’s my job, you were hired to play a part, not run the show.”
It’s important for me to remember

June 30

Practice of the Day-
BB pg 75,76
Ch- Into Action
Step 6-
Returning home we find a place where we can be quiet for an hour, carefully reviewing what we have done. We thank God from the bottom of our heart that we know Him better. Taking this book down from the shelf we turn to the page which contains the 12 steps. Carefully reading the first five proposals we ask if we have omitted anything, for we are building an arch through which we will walk a free man at last. Is our work solid so far? Are the stones properly in place? Have we skimped on the cement put into the foundation? Have we tried to make mortar without sand?
If we can answer to our satisfaction, we then look at Step Six. We have emphasized willingness as being indispensable. Are we now ready to let God remove from us all the things which we have admitted are objectionable? Can He now take them all—every one? If we still cling to something we will not let go, we ask God to help us be willing.

-Tom- some steps take a lot of time to do, like 4,5,9,12.
Steps 6 and 7 take one hour and a prayer.
One day in early sobriety (I had been through all the steps and was practicing 10,11,12 about 6 months sober)I sat in an A.A. meeting house writing; identifying and coming up with ways i was going to work on my character defects.
For about 2 hours.
An old
timer/friend, Pete N, came up and asked me what I was working on. I proudly showed him all my work and my plans. He said wow that’s a lot of work, I smiled and said thank you.
Then he said, “now Tom what I want you to do is throw all that waist of time in the garbage on your way to your truck.
Miss Mary still needs her grass cut, 5th steps need to be received out at the Colony and you need to speak at the prison tonight. Why don’t you try trusting in God, cleaning house and helping others first.
Now get out of there and Live sober instead of sitting here pretending to be.”
I told him he was such an asshole, slammed the door on my way out, did what he said to do, and learned a lesson of a Lifetime, doing sober actions is what makes me sober.
I pray that today I have the Willingness to do sober actions.