March 16

Connection is not just about making time for family and friends. It's about a sense of caring for other people. It's about connecting with the human spirit even when there is no national crisis. The other day I was walking down the street when a woman ahead of me tripped and fell on the sidewalk. Two people walked by her as if she weren't there. Others just stared without offering help; I stopped to help, as did another person. We both waited for an ambulance to arrive and then we left. I couldn't believe what I had just witnessed: a human being was in need of assistance and most people walked on by.

If we give lip service to love, how can we not be kind to the individuals we meet along our journey, regardless of their race, gender, religion, or sexual orientation? What happened to the connection?

This week is about making the connection. It's about making the time to connect with others.

You are reading from the book:

52 Weeks of Esteemable Acts by Francine Ward

March 17

Reflection for the Day

"Vision is, I think, the ability to make good estimates," wrote Bill W., the co-founder of Alcoholics Anonymous. "Some might feel this sort of striving to be heresy against 'One Day At A Time.' But that valuable principle really refers to our mental and emotional lives, and means chiefly that we are not foolishly to repine over the past nor wishfully daydream about the future." Can I believe that "A day has a hundred pockets when one has much to put in them... "?

Today I Pray

I pray that the bright colors of this day may not be blurred by muted vagaries of the future or dulled by storm-gray remnants from the past. I pray that my Higher Power will help me to choose my actions and concerns out of the wealth of busyness that each day offers.

Today I Will Remember

I will not lose for today, if I choose for today.

You are reading from the book:

A Day at a Time (Softcover) by Anonymous

March 18

Complacency breeds old behavior and unnecessary problems.

"The Promises," as suggested in the Big Book, clearly indicate that we have work to do if we want the rewards that are guaranteed in this program of recovery. Getting complacent, not using the tools that the program has taught us, opens the door to backsliding. Before long we are caught in the old game of manipulation: tension fills our lives again.

There are simple antidotes to complacency. Gratitude is one of them. Every morning we can take a few movements to appreciate all the goodness in our lives. Another powerful antidote is taking the time to consciously contact our Higher Power. God is always available to help us: we simply have to open the door. Sharing hope with others is perhaps the most powerful of the antidotes because it helps at least two people – ourselves and the listener who hears our story.

The Twelve Step program has made each of us a messenger for God. When we isolate, forgetting our role in this picture that's unfolding, the old attitudes and behaviors return. We are told to be "painstaking" about our efforts. The benefits will match them.

I will be present to the others in my life today and will acknowledge God in all that I do. My conscientiousness won't allow me to be complacent.

You are reading from the book:

A Life of My Own by Karen Casey

March 19

Celebrate your life and hear your spirit sing.
-- Elisabeth L.

"What's to celebrate?" some people ask. We all get our fill of the cynics. Their negativity can weigh down our spirits. But we don't have to let them control how we see our lives or theirs. To keep our own perceptions positive, it helps to detach from the naysayers. We will improve our chances if we consciously focus on gratitude for even the tiny blessings rather than on whatever might be wrong.

Becoming grateful is the strongest, safest means of feeling good now that we are abstinent. Not only does it readily alter our mood, but it changes our perspective on every detail of our lives. To be thankful rather than "thankless" is a small price to pay for unqualified happiness coupled with serenity.

We've all known people who radiate a singing spirit. They love life, themselves, and others. We seek out their company. We can be like those people for the travelers sharing our journey. Let's do it!

I will practice gratitude today and be a blessing in everyone's life.

You are reading from the book:

A Woman's Spirit by Karen Casey

March 20
When one door closes, fortune will usually open another.
-- Fernando De Rojas

Sometimes, especially in early recovery, we concentrate on our losses instead of our gains. We see a chapter in our life closing, and we mourn. We must leave some friends behind, or say good-bye to a social life we enjoyed. We must give up active addiction, which had become our best friend and only comfort. We may even have to leave our families, at least for a time, in order to concentrate on our own needs.

We need to grieve all these losses. Then we can see more clearly what recovery has brought us. For every loss, we've gained blessings. For every friend gone, we have the chance to make many more. A whole new sober life awaits us when we're ready to be part of it.

When we gave up the fake comforts of addiction, we found genuine comfort in sound sleep and healthy bodies, in peaceful days and serene nights. When we were ready to give up anger and resentment, we found generosity and forgiveness toward other people, and toward ourselves, too. In recovery, it's true, one door has closed. But another, better door has finally opened.

Today help me be grateful for my new life. Help me grieve my losses so I can appreciate all that awaits me.

You are reading from the book:

Body, Mind, and Spirit by Anonymous

March 21

Everything's got a moral, if only you can find it.
--Lewis Carroll

We must make many choices in our recovery. Some of these will strengthen our character, for they will be hard to make and sometimes even harder to accept. One of the most meaningful sayings in our program is Let go and let God. We understand its true meaning when we are faced with adversity and we feel needlessly hurt.

If we are to let go of a problem, we must feel in our hearts that no matter what the outcome, our Higher Power has a special purpose for us. We may not be able to see that purpose now, but if we let our Higher Power guide us, we will be guided down the right path. If we do our best to detach from our pain and try to see a more peaceful future, we will feel secure in God's hands. Given this security, we'll be free to direct our energy toward positive, healthy choices that will bring us more of the happiness we deserve.

Today help me let go and let God, even when it hurts.

You are reading from the book:

Body, Mind, and Spirit by Anonymous

March 22

Sharing our sobriety

We cannot give away something we don't have. And since the people closest to us forced us to see our inadequacies, our inability to love, most of us resented them. Although aware of the problem, we hated having it shown to us regularly. We were empty and scared. And there was no hope in sight, so we blamed our problems on those around us.

But by coming into the program things change: First we get hope; then we get strength and experience to share with other alcoholics and nonalcoholics. We learn that in order to keep what we've been given so freely, we must give it away.

Do I share my sobriety with others?

Higher Power, help me be ever aware of the source of all the good things I've been given, and show me each day how to share them with others.

You are reading from the book:

Day by Day - Second Edition by Anonymous

March 23

Only those means of security are good, are certain, are lasting that depend on yourself and your own vigor.
--Machiavelli

What is our security based upon? This is a vital, bottom-line question.

Security is a basic need of all humans. But as with all quests, if we look for the object of our search in an area where it cannot be found, we court certain frustration and failure.

Many would base their security on outside conditions. That is building our house on sand. Beauty passes, fame is fleeting, wealth can quickly evaporate, and health is fragile at best. What then is safe to count upon?

Only one security cannot be taken away, and it resides within. Security based on our own belief in ourselves, in our ability not only to cope and survive, but to celebrate life is the only security that lasts. As hard as it may be for adult children to learn they can trust themselves, it still is the only lasting security.

My security rests on the gains I've made in the program I've never had a stronger sense of self.

You are reading from the book:

Days of Healing, Days of Joy by Earnie Larsen and Carol Larsen Hegarty

March 24

There are many ways of breaking a heart. Stories were full of hearts broken by love, but what really broke a heart was taking away its dream - whatever that dream might be.
--Pearl S. Buck

No new door is opened without the inner urge for growth. Dreams guide us, encourage us, stretch us to new heights - and leave us momentarily empty when they are dashed.

Recovery has given us resilience and a multitude of reasons for living. We have come to understand that when one dream serves us no longer, it is making way for an even better one. Our dreams are our teachers. When the student is ready, a new one comes into focus.

Dreams in our earlier years often came to naught. They couldn't compete for our attention as effectively as the self-pity. The direction they offered was lost. Each day that we look forward with positive anticipation, we put the wreckage of the past farther from our minds.

Our dreams are like the rest areas on a cross-country trip. They refresh us, help us to gauge the distance we've come, and give us a chance to consider our destination.

Today's dreams and experiences are points on the road map of my life. I won't let them pass unnoticed.

You are reading from the book:

Each Day a New Beginning by Karen Casey

March 25

If you go around thinking you are being cheated,
life becomes very unpleasant.
--Felix Salten

Sometimes we feel cheated that we have been given this darn disease to cope with. Why us? Why can't we just be like normal people? Why did we have to get into so much trouble and pain as a result of a disease that hit us and skipped over other people?

Another way to look at it is: Hey, I'm really lucky. I have a killer disease, and I'm beating the odds. I'm getting healthier every day. I got my life back.

Another way to look at it is: At least this is a disease I can recover from.

The Big Book Promises (on pages 83 and 84) say that any feeling of self-pity will disappear by the time we are working Step Nine. We may even be grateful for the path that led us to recovery. Do we believe it? There's one way to find out: We need to try it.

Prayer for the Day

Higher Power, help me to remember that there are a lot worse things in life than being in recovery.

Today's Action

What are five good things that I have gotten from recovery? Ten? I will write these down and refer to them when I'm tempted to feel sorry for myself.

You are reading from the book:

God Grant Me... by Anonymous

March 26

The more I learn of others' problems, the more my own problems automatically dissolve.
--Tarthang Tulku Rinpoche

Newcomer

The second part of Step Eight says, "became willing to make amends to them all." I have to admit that this is a lot harder for me than simply recognizing that I've caused harm. I don't know if I'm ready to talk to certain people.

Sponsor

The willingness to make amends to everyone we've harmed, even those who may have harmed us, is something that we don't have to force or strive for. We become willing as part of yet another gradual process in recovery. We have begun to recognize that everything is interrelated, that whatever we've done to others, we've also done in some measure to ourselves. This is true not only of any harm that we've done, but also of the compassion that we've begun to feel. As we come to understand the impact of addiction on our lives, as we release our secrets and are met with gentleness and understanding, as we participate in the healing laughter at meetings, we replace old feelings of shame with compassion. Our new capacity to feel compassion for ourselves restores and revitalizes our understanding and care for others.

We become willing to make amends when we realize that in doing so, we are healing ourselves.

Today, I cultivate openness and compassion toward others.

You are reading from the book:

If You Want What We Have by Joan Larkin

March 27

Gratitude is a way of life.

Saying thank you from the heart makes us feel full. Perhaps we don't really know we have something until we express our thanks for it.

There are different levels of gratitude. There is the polite, automatic response when someone opens a door for us or the bank teller tells us to have a nice day. Simple, almost perfunctory, these acts of courtesy nevertheless add an element of grace to our daily transactions.

On a more personal level, saying thank you often and sincerely to those we love keeps us from taking each other for granted. We all like to feel appreciated - how many relationships dry up because the people involved don't realize what they have?

Then there is the gratitude we feel toward the God of our understanding, the source of all the blessings we enjoy but do not create for ourselves. This thankfulness can be a part of every breath we take. As often as we remember the many gifts of every day, our emptiness is filled.

Today, I will replenish my supply of gratitude.

You are reading from the book:

Inner Harvest by Elisabeth L.

March 28

He who is swift to believe is swift to forget.
-- Abraham Joshua Herschel

Life is full of questions. Many people tell us they have the answers. We have to be careful of who and what we believe. Other people's ideas may not fit us.

The program doesn't tell us much about what to believe. It teaches us how to believe. How well the program works for us depends on what we believe and how well we live it.

When we face all the facts, we can really believe. We believe we are powerless over our addiction. We believe we must and can change some things in our lives. We believe we can trust a Higher Power to care for us. When we choose to believe, we want to choose the best beliefs we can. And once we believe, we must not forget.

Prayer for the Day

Higher Power, help me know You, and help me know the truth.

Today's Action

Today I'll think about my First Step. Do I truly believe I'm powerless over my disease?

You are reading from the book:

Keep It Simple by Anonymous

March 29

I just pictured in my mind what I wanted to do. You can use that same formula in accomplishing anything in life.
--Ida Bellegarde

The imagination is a powerful tool. With practice we can perfect our use of it and the results will astound us. Research has shown that athletes who visualize a practice session on the field or mountain or course hone their skills as effectively as those who practice "in the flesh." This may be hard to believe, but it's nonetheless true.

If this formula has worked for others, it can work for you too. But how do you begin? First, consider what you would like to do. The next step is to sit quietly, close your eyes and imagine, in detail, the activity you want to pursue. Stay quiet with this image until it feels natural. Take special note of the sensations you feel throughout your body, the colors you see around you, your inner voice's message. Absorb the experience fully before coming back to reality.

Repeated "journeys" with your mind will make any activity feel familiar, and enough familiarity makes success possible.

I am not prevented from doing anything I really want to do. Using my imagination to experience it the first time will get me started.

You are reading from the book:

Keepers of the Wisdom by Karen Casey

March 30

It's good for your heart.

"I know I've got some emotions up, just brewing right beneath the surface," Jake said one day. "I'm edgy, irritable, and definitely not centered. But I don't want to look. I don't want to go into the emotions. I don't like feelings. Whenever I give into them, I end up feeling like a piece of cooked spaghetti for days."

Emotions can take a lot out of us. Feeling them, whether it's anger, fear, or sadness, can leave us exhausted and drained.

Not feeling our emotions, however, can keep us edgy, irritable, and off-balance. Not feeling our feelings for an extended time can drive us to acting out, whether that means overeating, obsessing, staying in bed and hiding from the world, or staring at the television every night until we pass out.

Be gentle with yourself. Don't force it. But don't run away from your feelings, either. You might feel like cooked spaghetti for a while, but what's really softening up is your heart.

God, help me face and feel any feelings.

You are reading from the book:

More Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie