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August 16
Step by Step "I came to AA simply because there were no other doors of help open to me. In AA, I have had to be torn down and then put back together differently. No one could live such an irresponsible, immature life as I had without consequences. AA made it possible for me to face the consequences of my past actions. After I came to AA, I was divorced by my wife; I lost my practice; I was legally restrained from seeing my children; I went broke ...Only AA kept me from running away." - Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, "They Stopped in Time," Ch 14 ("Growing Up All Over Again"), p 420. Today, taking up an AA recovery program in and of itself does not excuse me from responsibility to the consequences of my drinking - nor should it. In facing those consequences, my life in early recovery may become even more difficult than it was when I was drinking because recovery may require complete reconstruction of my entire being. Part of that rebuilding may be to answer for my misconduct of my drinking days. If I am in the position of accountability although I am not drinking, the purpose of my AA program in part is to give me the tools to accept responsibility and consequences without a slip or relapse. And in taking responsibility and paying whatever dues I owe, I may be able to see myself grow into sobriety by clearing away the garbage of my drinking days. If today should be one of judgment for me, I will embrace it as an opportunity to be done with the bad once and for all and move forward by accepting whatever may be my just due. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M. ************************************************** ~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~ TRUST Our entire Program rests upon the principle of mutual trust. We trust our Higher Power, we trust the Program, and we trust each other. ~ Anonymous ~ When we were using, we trusted no one. We lied about everything, even the smallest thing, so how could we trust what anyone else told us? Cheating was a way of life. Finding reasons for our actions kept us busy rationalizing away our lives. So how could we trust anyone? How could we trust ourselves? We couldn't even trust ourselves to keep track of our lies. They were so big and so many and so confusing that we just drowned bur denial in chemicals. They it didn't matter anymore. The only thing we thought we could trust was our addiction. When we discovered it was the biggest lie of all, we lost trust in everything. We had nowhere to go. And that was the greatest day of our lives. I have put my trust in the Program, the Steps, my sponsor, my group, and my Higher Power, and, little by little, day by day, I am learning to trust again. ************************************************** ~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~ The great man is he who does not lose his child-heart. ~ Mencius ~ No matter what we have done or what has happened to us, no matter how guilty, worried, or fearful we feel, there was a time when we were small, innocent, and open-hearted toward the world. That happy and playful boy still lives within us. Sometimes he seems like a distant memory, but we would do well to bring him close to us, give him a place in our awareness, and honor and protect him. Some of us remembered that little boy being treated too harshly or shamed too deeply, and we adopted false attitudes of disgust toward him. But we can go back still further to a time when he was innocent and we could love him. A strong and healthy man carries that boy close to his heart and lets him come forth to be playful and lighthearted. That boy can be the source of eagerness to learn and hope for the future. He can put himself in the shoes of the small and the weak and treat them with gentleness. Today my child-heart beats within me as strongly as it ever did. ************************************************** ~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~ Life is a process of learning to unlearn untruths someone else believes. ~ Laurel Lewis ~ The truth for each of us is unique. We may share values and opinions on many matters, but our perception is colored by our personal history. Many of us grew up in or still live in families that demand our allegience to beliefs we don’t honestly share. Pretending doesn’t fit us anymore. Perhaps it never did, but we lacked the strength to stand up for our beliefs. We wanted desperately to fit in and be loved. We still do, but we want to respect ourselves too. We can do that only when we’re true to what we believe, regardless of the beliefs of our family members or friends. At first it’s painful to break away from the beliefs that other people want us to share: we feel isolated and vulnerable. Let’s look to the women who are striving to grow in this same way to support us in our struggle. Knowing they understand our fear to be “us” makes knowing our personal truth all the more possible. I will agree with the beliefs of some on my path today and disagree with others. I’ll ask my Higher Power for the courage to speak my own truth. ************************************************** ~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~ I want courage and honesty Sometimes I don’t want to go to my meeting. I especially didn’t want to when I'd had a slip and would have to admit that I wasn’t clean or sober. I felt I'd let myself down (or somehow had let down the group). I felt guilty, ashamed. I've since learned that they will still accept me and help me—if I ask. What I have been learning in the program is how important honesty is to recovery. (I have lied to myself long enough.) To get help, I need to be open about my problems and my behavior with the people who can help me. It's the only way I can handle my addiction (as well as my emotional illness). When things are going well, it's easy for me to go to meetings. When I'm unsure about my sobriety or my recovery it takes courage. I will pray for courage and use my daily Step Ten inventory to stay honest with myself. ************************************************* ~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~ I sold the memoirs of my love life to Parker Brothers and they’re going to make a game out of it. ~ Woody Allen ~ Sexuality is a combination of our past experiences and our expectations for the future. Our sexuality is also influenced by social factors: advertisements, talk shows, movies, songs, etc. With all these influences, it’s not surprising that most of us are somewhat confused and often disappointed in our own sexuality. If we’re newly-recovering, Easy Does It is the best thing to remember. When we were drinking/ drugging, we may have abused our sexuality. We may have used it as a weapon or threat. We may have allowed others to abuse it. We may have acted in ways we never would have sober. Recognizing this, we must now forgive ourselves and make a serious commitment to respect our bodies. Our Higher Power can help us let go of our past mistakes. He forgives us — and we can, too. Making peace with our sexuality can help us value and enjoy ourselves again. Slowly, in time, positive feelings about our bodies and ourselves as sexual beings will develop. Today I pray that my sexual self will emerge healthy and proud. ************************************************** ~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~ We have two ears and one mouth so that we can listen twice as much as we speak. ~ Epictetus ~ A Zen story tells of four monks who had made a vow to meditate for two weeks without speaking. They decided that each night they would gather in a dark room, light a candle, and meditate in silence. One night the candle flickered, and then went out. The first monk immediately cried out, “Oh, no, the candle has gone out.” The second monk said, “You have just spoken!” The third monk pointed out, “You two have just broken our vow of silence.” The fourth monk arose, began a little dance, and said, “I win! I am the only one who did not speak.” It is through listening that you are able to develop a greater understanding for what others are going through. Your listening enables you to stop the urge to control others, to overcome prejudice and judgment, and to gain greater awareness of what is going on around you. While it takes courage to stand up and speak at a meeting or to admit your shortcomings to others, it also takes courage to sit down and truly listen. I will listen to the words of others, the guidance of my Higher Power, and the sounds of silence. In doing so, I will gain greater wisdom. ************************************************** ~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~ If a ship has been sunk, I can't bring it up. If it is going to be sunk, I can't stop it. I can use my time much better working on tomorrow's problem than by fretting about yesterday's. ~ Admiral Ernest J. King ~ Have we ever really thought about the things we cannot change? We may know we can't change things, but we need to personalize that list. What people can't we change? What places? What things? Until we make a list, we may spin our wheels trying to change the actions or thoughts of others. We may try to control the lives of our children, relatives, or friends. We may attempt to force attitude changes in the boss, teachers, or co-workers. We may even go so far as to believe we can change traffic patterns, the weather, or the past! Saying we cannot change things is not enough. We need to recognize what people, places, and things we have been trying to change. By listing them, we will recognize there is only one thing in our lives that we can change—ourselves. Who are the people and what are the things I cannot change? After I list these things, I can begin working on who I can change—myself. ************************************************** ~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~ Persuading others This is a program of attraction, not promotion. It’s not necessary to persuade people to see things our way. If our new lives—clean, sober, and serene—are not enough to attract others, then they have not yet suffered enough to want help. We are instructed simply to carry the message. Our Higher Power will put us in position to help others and put others in position to be helped. It then becomes their choice—to reach out for help or turn away. Have I let go of helping others until they want help from me? Higher Power, help me to remember that my job is only to carry the message. Today I mil be available with the message for God help me to stay clean and sober today! ************************************************** ~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~ The more I learn of others' problems, the more my own problems automatically dissolve. ~ TARTHANG TULKU RINPOCHE ~ Newcomer The second part of Step Eight says, "became willing to make amends to them all." I have to admit that this is a lot harder for me than simply recognizing that I've caused harm. I don't know if I'm ready to talk to certain people. Sponsor The willingness to make amends to everyone we've harmed, even those who may have harmed us, is something that we don't have to force or strive for. We become willing as part of yet another gradual process in recovery. We have begun to recognize that everything is interrelated, that whatever we've done to others, we've also done in some measure to ourselves. This is true not only of any harm that we've dong but also of the compassion that we've begun to feel. As we come to understand the impact of addiction on our lives, as we release our secrets and are met with gentleness and understanding, as we participate in the healing laughter at meetings, we replace old feelings of shame with compassion. Our new capacity to feel compassion for ourselves restores and revitalizes our understanding and care for others. We become willing to make amends when we realize that in doing so we are healing ourselves. Today, I cultivate openness and compassion toward others. ************************************************** ~ THE EYE OPENER ~ The older some of us get in AA the more we notice a tendency on our part to become a little bit less tolerant, a little less understanding in our relationship with the man still having trouble. We have been so long removed from the actual suffering that we are losing some of our understanding. This is a good time to pick out the messiest case we can find and get back in the groove again. We can't afford to forget that we too are alcoholics and but for the Grace of God we would be in just as bad shape. We may be years away from our last drunk but we are only one drink away from our next one. Don't lose the common touch. ************************************************** ~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~ We Are Students Dear God, once again, we are students. In recovery we are learning the secrets of living completely. In recovery we have cleared our thinking of obsessions, dependencies, denials, fears, resentments, and other destructive habits that have ruled us. Dear God, through Your wisdom we have opened our minds to accept and our hearts to understand. Dear God, in my troubled years I remembered my school days as perhaps the happiest of my life. I thought they were gone. But I've found them again through You, the Program, and my many teachers. I love being back in school. Thank You, God. ************************************************* ~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~ OUR DELIVERANCE Read Psalm 91. And now the Word of Truth is represented as addressing you with an authoritative assurance that your prayer will be answered, that in some way or other—not necessarily in the way that you expect—you will be rescued from your difficulty. Surely He shall deliver thee from the snare of the fowler, and from the noisome pestilence. He shall covet thee with His feathers, and under His wings shalt thou trust: His Truth shall be thy shield and buckler. You are to have no apprehension, for your protection is now assured in one of those illustrations from everyday life in which the Bible abounds. The motherly hen, at the slightest threat of danger, gathers the little chicks under her wings, covering them "with her feathers"; thus does God shield you from all danger once you have elected to trust Him. His truth shall be thy shield and buckler. It is the knowledge of the Truth about God and man that makes the demonstration. Thou shalt not be afraid for the tenor by night; nor for the arrow that flieth by day; nor for the pestilence that walketh in darkness; nor for the destruction that wasteth at noonday. The arrow that flieth by day and the destruction that wasteth at noon refer to any difficulty of which you are consciously aware. It is, so to say, a daytime problem. The terror by night and the pestilence that walketh in darkness, on the contrary, imply something that, unknown to you, is working in your subconscious mind. Modem psychology has shown that most of our difficulties have their roots in the depth of the subconscious. These are indeed terrors of the mental night and pestilences of the darkness. ************************************************** ~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~ Breaker Breaker Stop!—in the name of love… ~ from the song of the same name, by Eddie Holland ~ When the circuit breaker in my laundry room flipped off, I switched it back on. The dryer ran for a while, and again the breaker switched itself off. I turned it on again and did a few more laundry loads like this, discovering that I could get about 15 minutes of use before the circuit breaker would shut itself down. Finally, I called in an electrician, who told me that he could come after the weekend. During that time, I did more laundry, working the system at 15-minute intervals. When the electrician arrived, he opened up the electrical panel and showed me a charred wire going into the laundry circuit breaker. “You came this close to having a house fire," he informed me soberly. "These breakers are designed to be turned off and on maybe 15 or 20 times in their lifetime; after that they're useless—the resistance backs up into the wiring system and voila, Kentucky Fried household.” I shuddered to think that my home was so close to danger, and felt very grateful that he had caught the problem in time. When something in our life is malfunctioning, we receive signs, warnings, hints, and tripped breakers. In an emergency, we can override the breaker and keep going for a bit, but before long we must take action. If I had been more tuned in, I would have realized that something was wrong with the system and that it was not wise to keep overriding the breaker. In life, too, we cannot afford to keep overriding the breakers. We must heed the breaker's warning and go to the source of the problem rather than simply treating the symptom. Instead of depending on aspirin to take away a headache, we need to face who or what is giving us a headache and deal with the problem at its source. Keep your antennae up for signals: Take the grace and then take the action. Show me what I need to do to live in integrity and wholeness. I accept God’s guidance through the messages of my life. |
August 17
Step by Step "A lot of lost dreams, empty futures and crazy things of the past went through my mind. One night, I was struck with the memory of a line Alan Ladd used in 'Shane,' a movie that I'd worked on. He told a villain, 'The trouble is, old man, you've lived too long.' How that line echoed through my mind! I knew why I identified. It was MY line, the story of MY life. I'd lived too long and become a loser, dependent on booze. Well, at least I could drink myself to death. Real soon. Then everyone would be sorry for me." - Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, "They Stopped in Time," Ch 3 ("Those Golden Years"), p 333. Today, no asking if I have lived too long or too briefly and if I am predestined to "drink myself to death," exiting the world with everyone feeling "sorry" for me. Is this the legacy for which I have lived my life? If I want and expect better, and whether I am sober or drinking today, AA has given me the tools to build the legacy that will remain after I am gone. And the program promises better than being remembered as the "poor soul" who wasted a lifetime and died an alcoholic's death. Through AA, I can craft my legacy to be someone who rose from an alcoholic's gutter and re-crafted himself as a person who sobered up and sought to help the person who became helpless and hopeless. But I cannot think in terms of my final legacy. It is built 24 Hours at a time. Today, I focus on what my legacy is now. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M. ************************************************** ~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~ PRAYER The only way to pray is to pray, and the way to pray well is to pray often. ~ Anonymous ~ To us in recovery, prayer is always the one great move on our part that leads to spiritual progress. The need for prayer and meditation is a big part of our Program. Step Eleven is centered on the necessity for us to seek through prayer and meditation our own awareness of what God's will is for us. We now know that prayer is best when it takes the form of a conversation with our Higher Power. Surely it can never be a span of time during which we are engaged only in asking, demanding, bargaining, or borrowing. A large part of all prayer and meditation should be devoted to our listening for answers. And answers do always come to those who are patient, tolerant, and trusting. When I began to pray in recovery, the only prayer I said was "Thank You, God." Now I have many other prayers and I pray often. Now I know that my prayers are answered. ************************************************** ~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~ Marriage is our last best chance to grow up. ~ Joseph Barth ~ Most of us think of marriage in romantic terms. We imagine finding the “right one” and we form a vision of the ideal mate. Others of us have given up on ever finding a lifelong partner. The romance of a relationship naturally plays a less important role as we deal with practical matters like house cleaning, earning a living, and child care. When problems develop, we think about how we want our partner to change. If only they would listen to us more. If only they would spend money more responsibly. If only... If only — Most of our ideas about improving our marriage are left over from childhood ideas about how we would like to be taken care of. We want more attention. We want more love. We want to change our partners to satisfy our needs better. But when we give up on changing our partners, we grow up ourselves. When we accept that our partners are also on a life path, which is not identical to our own, we can accept them as friends, and the good things we share grow in importance. Today I will be a full-grown man, responsible for my part in my intimate relationship, and let the rest go. ************************************************** ~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~ Shut up and listen! ~ Anne Arthur ~ Sometimes we need to do ourselves a favor and "shut up and listen.” Depending on our family, we may have heard the words “Shut up!” many times daily. To counter the verbal abuse, we might have learned to carry on an inner dialogue to drown out these words. That way of coping served us well. However, it became our habit to shut others out, regardless of their words, and now we need to break that habit. It serves us no more. In fact, it harms us. We have learned that our Higher Power often tries to reach us through the words of a friend. If we have an inner dialogue going on, we will not hear the guidance we seek. We have heard many times in Twelve Step meetings the saying “When the student is ready the teacher appears.” Being quiet is being ready. I will be ready for my lesson today. I will listen intently to the words of my friends. ************************************************** ~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~ I gain strength and serenity in the program Of late my life is troubled. My mind is plagued, my body abused, my spirit downcast. My addiction ignites the depression which fans the addiction. The cycle is strong. But the cycle is weakening. As I continue to practice my Twelve Step program, devote time to it each day, I feel stronger and less troubled. By attending meetings each week and listening carefully to fellow members—my strong and humble teachers—I am coming to accept myself as I am, with all my problems. To help myself by helping others, I will offer to do service for my group. ************************************************* ~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~ The longer you’re in recovery, the more you appreciate humor. ~ Julie K. ~ Humor has long been recognized as an aid to recovery. Humor is part of most Twelve Step meetings in one form or another. It could be a story shared, a comment or an aside, or something that just pops out. We appreciate humor because it shows our common bond. It brings our spirits closer together. It relieves tension, and helps us banish worry. We laugh as a group, never “at” someone, but with someone. Humor also gives us a way to share an experience we all know only too well. When we smile or laugh, we own our pain, forgive ourselves, and share understanding. We may have lost our sense of humor from years of seriousness, neglect, inner pain, and rigidity. Regaining it can be a sign that we are making real progress in our recovery after years of pain, hurt, and isolation. The smiles humor generates remind us that we are getting better every day. Today help me see the beauty of a flower, a smile, a sober lifestyle, one moment at a time. ************************************************** ~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~ Those that are most slow in making a promise are the most faithful in the performance of it. ~ Jean-Jacques Rousseau ~ Each day you may hear hundreds of promises. Advertisers promise that your clothes will be cleaner, your hair will be thicker and fuller, or you will shed excess weight in a short amount of time. Similarly, politicians make campaign promises to end war, lower taxes, increase employment, and unite the two parties of government. The sad truth is, you have probably developed a thick skin to such promises. You know that the product you buy will most likely not deliver the promised results. You know that when the politician is elected, the promises made will most likely not be fulfilled. Just as you do not trust the advertisers or politicians or the promises they make and do not keep, so too may others have lost trust and faith in the promises you made when you were using. In the beginning, they wanted to believe what you were saying. But, over time, you simply became an advertiser or politician making promises just to get buy-in. In your recovery it is important for you to make promises and to deliver upon those promises. Make promises that you can and will fulfill, and you will be building a lusting foundation of trust. Today I will deliver on any promise I make. ************************************************** ~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~ . . . there are hundreds of tasks we feel we must accomplish in the day, but if we do not take them one at a time and let them pass through the day slowly and evenly, as do the grains of sand passing through the narrow neck of the hourglass, then we are bound to break our own physical or mental structure. ~ Ted Bengermino ~ Our mental and physical states at bedtime are important. If we are tense, edgy, and feel a sense of failure and defeat, our sleep will probably be restless and unpeaceful. But if we go to sleep tonight feeling we have put the day to rest in peace and acceptance, our sleep will likely be restorative and refreshing. What difference does it make if things are left undone tonight? Will it matter ten years from now? Nothing is so important that we should carry tension and worry into our relaxation time. What is important is our ability to accept the day's events by the time we're ready to sleep. The most important thing right now is to get the rest we need to be in good shape for tomorrow. The day is done, and so is the day's work I am ready to relax in a peaceful, restful sleep. I can loosen the day's tension from my shoulders and meditate on acceptance. ************************************************** ~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~ Pausing for HALT The acronym HALT reminds us to avoid getting too hungry, angry, lonely, or tired. When we feel this way for a while, we are much more likely to have a slip or to relapse. When we feel especially hungry, angry, lonely, or tired, it helps to pause and attend to what our bodies and spirits are telling us they need. We will be happier and more serene when we can avoid their extremes. Do I pause when I feel too H?A?L?T? Higher Power, help me to become more aware of the needs of my body and spirit. If I feel especially hungry, angry, lonely, or tired today, I will God help me to stay clean and sober today! ************************************************** ~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~ Duty is what one expects from others—it is not what one does oneself. ~ OSCAR WILDE ~ Newcomer I do intend to make amends to everyone I've harmed, but I still feel scared when I start to think about it. Sponsor The prospect of facing someone whom we owe amends may bring up unnecessary fear if we cling to our old notion that we do everything alone. We can plan to telephone a sponsor or program friend both before and after making the amend. We can ask for help from our Higher power; praying for the willingness to make the amend, for the ability to speak our truth simply and clearly, and for the serenity that comes from understanding that another person’s response is not in the realm of things we can control. Tools work, when we’re willing to use them. As always, faith is the antidote to fear. If we feel that our faith is insufficient, we can listen to others in recovery sharing about their experience of the loving presence of a Higher Power—we can borrow from others, reserves of faith, when our own are low Today, I'm not alone. I allow myself to ask for and accept the support I need and deserve. ************************************************** ~ THE EYE OPENER ~ As startling as this may sound to some members, AA has no first, second or third class memberships. A sober member is in good standing if he has been dry for twenty-four hours or twenty-four months. Of course, no one means to discriminate, but some of us just naturally gravitate to a certain person or group of persons within the group. The “low-bottoms” are just as guilty as the “high-bottoms” in this respect. After all, we were all drunks and all of us smelled the same when we came in. ************************************************** ~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~ Blessing from Lao Tzu Follow diligently the Way in your own heart, but make no display of it to the world. Keep behind, and you shall be put in front. Keep out, and you shall be kept in. He who humbles himself shall be preserved entire. He who bends shall be made straight. He who is empty shall be filled. He who is worn out shall be renewed. ************************************************* ~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~ OUR PROMISE Read Psalm 91 A thousand shall fall at thy side, and ten thousand at thy right hand; but it shall not come nigh thee. Only with thine eyes shalt thou behold and see the reward of the wicked. This clause has been taken to indicate some kind of favoritism on the part of God, whereas, of course, such a thing is impossible. It means simply that those who pray are saved from trouble that would otherwise overtake them, and that does, in fact, overtake those who do not pray. Because thou hast made the Lord, which is my refuge, even the most High, thy habitation; There shall no evil befall thee, neither shall any plague come nigh thy dwelling. In the Bible, the word promise is the name given to a statement of some spiritual law. So, a "Bible promise" is a statement of the consequences that naturally follow from certain states of consciousness. If Boyle's law were written in the Bible idiom, it would read something like this: "As I live, saith the Lord, whenever thou shalt double the pressure of a gas, thou shalt halve the volume, temperature remaining constant." In the language of natural science, our Bible promise would run: "By meditating regularly on the Presence of God with you, and directing your life in accordance with that fact, you become immune from any kind of danger." ************************************************** ~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~ Honor the Angel Allow children to be happy their own way; for what better way will they ever find? ~ Samuel Johnson ~ When a child is born in Bali, its feet are not allowed to touch the earth for the first 105 days of life. The Balinese regard their children as angels from heaven, and they do not want them to be shocked by contact with the heaviness of the world. Every Balinese child is constantly held until almost four months of age. Then, a colorful ceremony is held at which the child's feet are placed upon the earth, with prayers and blessings. In our culture, we need to remember to honor our children as spiritual beings. We all come from heaven, and the transition to earth is not easy for anyone. We must give our children the opportunity to retain their spiritual identity for as long as possible. Many children are extremely psychic and spiritual, as you may have been. They voice the wisdom of old and wise souls; some report memories of past lives, talk to invisible friends, play with nature spirits, have premonitions, and recount contact with departed relatives. Many are quite sensitive to the energies in their environment, feeling touched and healed by loving people and events, and jarred by violence in thought or deed. We must give our children the best possible atmosphere in which to start their journey. Let them be spiritual beings for as long as they choose; do not force them to trade their heritage for our cultural idea of education. The best gift we can give our children is to draw forth that which they already are. Help me to respect children as whole and wise beings. Through them I will remember my own innocence. I come from heaven to bestow the gifts of God. |
August 18
Step by Step "I had to hide, as a great many people in AA have had to do. I did my hiding in the hampers and in my dresser drawers. When we begin to do things like that with alcohol, something's gone wrong. I needed it, and I knew I was drinking too much, but I wasn't conscious of the fact that I should stop. I kept on. My home ...was a place to mill around in. I wandered from room to room, thinking, drinking, drinking, thinking. ...(A)nd after supper, I'd finish the job up and knock myself out." - Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, "They Stopped In Time," Ch 4 ("The Housewife Who Drank at Home"), pp 336-7. Today, remembering what it was like, hiding full and half-empty whiskey bottles under the mattress, in a suitcase that hadn't been used in years, in seldom opened dresser drawers and, as I discovered later when I stopped drinking, in places I didn't know existed. All the hiding - even though I lived alone. It wasn't until I quit drinking and found bottles I forgot I had hidden that I realized that "something's gone wrong." There is no humor in the craziness of hiding booze in a house where no one but me lives, only a statement of the pathetic drunk I had become. Today I have nothing to hide, and it's only by the grace of God and AA that I no longer have a reason to hide. Today, I will not do anything that has to be hidden. Hiding just takes too much time and energy. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M. ************************************************** ~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~ LYING What a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive. ~ Shakespeare ~ When we set out to lie, the person always most painfully hurt is ourself. Trying to fool people is always done with arrogance. “You can’t fool all the people all the time." This deprives us of the ability to be willing and open minded. These lost qualities are necessary for us to have within ourselves if we are to find a comfortable recovery. Big and even white lies seldom go undetected by the people in contact with the liar. Dishonesty always leads to the knowledge that the dishonest one is a cheat. This results in a return of painful shame, guilt, and regret. The Program reminds us that those who cannot or will not recover are incapable of being honest with themselves. I know when I lie I'm not being honest. The Program suggests to me that absolute honesty is impossible for humans but I have the capacity to grow in honesty. ************************************************** ~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~ Facing our pain, seeing the enemy as a potential ally, learning to wait, giving inner events time to ripen and mature—are methods we can use... for transformation. ~ Harry R. Moody and David Carroll ~ Sometimes we need to break out of our established ways of thinking. We need to do what is counterintuitive in order to solve a problem. This program is a path of personal transformation. We lay the footings for this transformation by trying something different. Instead of forcing change, we get out of the way for change to happen. We are not being passive and doing nothing. We are actively engaging in a new way of understanding. Who or what are my enemies? What am I battling? What if I look at enemies as potential allies who could teach me something? What if I didn’t work so hard at fixing a loved one’s problems? What if I decide to let a process evolve and see where it leads? These transforming ideas create a whole different set of outcomes. As we try them on, perhaps not only will the problem be resolved, maybe we ourselves will be transformed. Today I will be open to seeing things in a new way. I will assume that I don’t understand things completely and I can still learn more. ************************************************** ~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~ I like to look at perfection as continual expansion. It’s only when I stagnate and am afraid of change that I am imperfect. ~ Carlotta Posz ~ Perfection is a coat of many colors. Some people think we are perfect just as we are, simply because we are children of God. Others think that perfection is an unattainable goal because we must release all shortcomings and strengthen all assets to attain it. From sponsors we learn that any effort to live more peace-filled lives heightens our sense of a more perfect existence. Perfection, like beauty, is in the eye of the beholder. Luckily, we are surrounded by loving friends who can help us see our progress when we are blind to all but our failed attempts. Our attempts to grow, learn, change, and love others more fully will satisfy our Higher Power completely. These acts, repeatedly made, will cultivate in us the only perfection that truly counts. I will do the best I can today toward my loved ones and all others I meet. If I do that, God will view my actions as “perfect.” ************************************************** ~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~ I am not a bad person When I think about making an Eighth Step list of people I have harmed, I feel guilty and shameful. I get a knot in my stomach and start to feel down. But there is that hopeful, spiritual part of me that knows I'm not a bad person even though I've hurt people. What is true is that I have two no-fault illnesses, and that particularly when using, I did some things I feel bad about and would not do again. What's also true is that this is just a list (no actions are needed yet), it is my list (no one need see it), and I can take my time. It helps when I keep in mind that I am a different person today, one with awareness, strength, and purpose. Today I will make a list of the people I care about and do an act of kindness for one of them. ************************************************* ~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~ We must be willing to begin to learn to love ourselves. ~ Louise L. Hay ~ What a joy, what a relief to find a new friend in recovery — ourselves. Long hidden, perhaps to the point of non-existence, we buried ourselves in years of drinking or using and denied our own presence in the scenario of life. Rediscovering ourselves doesn’t happen overnight, however, just because we stop drinking. It’s a gradual getting-to-know-you process. It takes time and patience and tender loving care to establish a relationship with ourselves, and to come to believe in ourselves. And it takes loving and discipline. Our bodies need nourishment, sleep, and exercise. Our minds crave nourishment, too. And our spiritual peace requires daily prayer and meditation to flourish. But the rewards are great: now we can look forward to spending a lifetime with someone we love: ourselves. Today help me see myself as a whole person, worthy of love and care and respect as I grow in sobriety. Help me accept who I am, and to become the best I can be. ************************************************** ~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~ Addictive behaviors come in many forms and packages and they can all put us into slavery where we are no longer free to walk in what God has given us. ~ Rodney Johnson ~ Those with addictive tendencies may not only be addicted to alcohol, chemical substances, gambling, cigarettes, or an excess of food, but also to a multitude of other things. You may use technology so much that if you cannot get a signal for your cell phone or log on to your computer, your only focus becomes reconnection. You may be a daily exerciser who feels miserable when you have to skip a workout, so you end up creating misery all around you. You may focus solely on your work and not give time or attention to the needs of others—or even to your own needs. Sometimes the most harmless or helpful habits can grow into addictions. If being without them—even for a short period of time—causes you discomfort, makes you lash out in anger and frustration at others, escalates your levels of stress or anxiety, or absorbs most if not all of your focus and attention, then your good habit may have developed into an addiction. Today I will be aware of how being without a particular activity affects me. ************************************************** ~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~ For every ailment under the sun, There is a remedy, or there is none; If there be one, try to find it; If there is none, never mind it. ~ Mother Goose ~ Long ago peddlers sold instant remedies for everything from illness to baldness. "Miracle" cures did a brisk business because people always wanted to try the next instant solution to persistent ailments and problems. Are we still looking for a miracle cure, one that will make us that person we always wanted to be? Although those peddlers sold a lot of cures, none beat the time-tested methods of assured success for curing worry and woes: plenty of time, a good deal of effort, and an acceptance of things that can't be changed. There are miracle cures in the program, but they are not instant. In fact, sometimes we can't even feel the restorative powers until months later. But if we continue to take them, the cures we get in the program are guaranteed for life. Our lives can be free from worries and woes with the program. Tonight I can plan to get a good, healthy dose of the cure by attending a meeting tomorrow, reading literature, or talking with my sponsor. ************************************************** ~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~ Adjusting and coping Many of us in recovery do not like the idea of having to adjust and cope. We have “controlled” our lives for so many years, it’s hard to believe that the world does not revolve around us. But it doesn’t. And we can see now that forcing situations to suit ourselves inevitably leaves other people “unsuited” and unhappy. The good news may not seem to make sense at first. If we find ways to adjust and cope, our lives will actually get easier. Things will go our way more often. We will experience less stress, both externally and internally. We will experience harmony. Am I learning to adjust and cope? Higher Power, help me to want what I have. Today I will adjust to, or cope with, others’ wants or needs by God help me to stay clean and sober today! ************************************************** ~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~ Pray for the bastard. ~ SAYING HEARD AT MEETINGS ~ Newcomer You've told me I should pray for someone who's been causing me all sorts of problems. But that’s not going to change him, is it? Sponsor I've heard various descriptions of how prayer works. Some say God listens; some say our thoughts affect the energy of the universe and create change; some say that we're conditioning ourselves to transform our own attitudes, and those attitudes, good and bad, are contagious. It's a mystery—but it does work. Someone I worked with seemed so disrespectful and unpleasant that I dreaded encounters with her. I began saying a daily prayer for her health and complete happiness. Before gatherings that included her, I prayed that communication between us would be easy and smooth and that each person's highest good in that situation would be realized. The effects were dramatic. I experienced relief from my fear of facing her and began to see her as a whole human being. I genuinely began to want her well-being. My body language and facial expressions probably changed; perhaps I stopped sending messages of dislike and rejection when I saw her. For whatever reason, she stopped turning her back on me and sometimes actually smiled. I'm not suggesting that we try to manipulate others to behave as we wish. Specific results and timetables aren't in our hands. But I do know that our prayers are always effective in furthering our own and others' processes of healing. Today, I pray for others, placing them in my Higher Power's hands. ************************************************** ~ THE EYE OPENER ~ Filth and dirt were the things we were trying to avoid when we climbed out of the gutter. To get physically out of the slime and still leave your mind wallowing in it will inevitably lead to trouble. You have only succeeded in getting your body on the sidewalk if your head is still in the gutter. You should get your feet with your head in God's clean air to insure sobriety. To do something about your habits without cleaning up your thinking is like taking a bath and neglecting to wash your dirty feet. ************************************************** ~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~ Grant Me to Walk in Beauty I come before You as one of Your Children. See, I am small and weak; I pray for Your strength and wisdom. Grant me to walk in beauty and that my eyes may ever behold the crimson sunset. May my hands treat with respect the things that You have created; May my ears hear Your voice. Make me wise, that I may understand the things that You have taught others in our Program. I long for strength, not that I may outreach others, but to fight my greatest enemy—myself. Make me ever ready to come to You with clear thinking and candid eyes, so that my spirit, when life disappears like the setting sun, may stand unashamed before You. ~ Adapted from a prayer by Chief Yellow Lark ~ ************************************************* ~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~ OUR ASSURANCE Read Psalm91. Far He shall give His angels charge over thee, to keep thee in all thy ways. They shall bear thee up in their hands, lest thou dash thy foot against a stone. This is one of the loveliest of all the promises in the Bible. For tender beauty it stands alone. He shall give His angel charge over thee, to keep thee in all thy ways—and it is meant for you and for me. It might have seemed appropriate enough that some exalted Being should be given an escort of angels to surround him, to support him, to keep him in all his ways. But the Bible is the book of Everyman, and this promise is given to you and to me. ************************************************** ~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~ Because I Say So The choice is yours to make between a sleeping death…or a happy waking and joy of life. ~ A Course in Miracles ~ Walking out of the movie theater after seeing Mr. Holland's Opus, I felt exhilarated. In the midst of the parking lot, I stretched out my arms, looked up at the stars, and exclaimed, "Life is good!" I laughed and turned to my friend and asked her, "Do you know why? Because I say so." I recognized with perfect surety that I can live any life I choose. If I want to be happy, that's my choice. If others want to be miserable, that’s up to them. l do not have to justify, explain, rationalize, apologize, or compromise my choice for joy. I create my own reality, just as you do. The universe is big enough to have all kinds of reality happening simultaneously, and none of us needs agreement from anyone to verify the world we choose to live in. Do you remember when, as a child, your father laid down a rule, and when you asked him, "Why?" he answered, "Because I said so.” He was affirming that he had the power to establish your reality, and you didn't get to question it. Now you have the power to establish your own reality, and no one else gets to question it. When I worked with profoundly mentally handicapped people, most observers pitied them, but I respected them. They were some of the happiest and most loving people I have ever met. Their intellects were minimally developed, which allowed them to retain their childlike innocence throughout their lives. Perhaps on some cosmic dimension their souls decided they could learn a great deal about joy by living an entire life without thinking too much. Are they better or worse off than most people? That depends on the side of the telescope you're looking through. What reality would you like to live in? Do you choose a world of love, abundance, and celebration, or one of fear, lack, and doom? The choice is yours—because you say so. Bless me with the choice to live in a world that reflects Your loving presence. I choose a reality of ever-expanding good. |
August 19
Step by Step "There are many things worse than dying, but is there any death worse than the progressive, self-induced slow suicide of the practicing alcoholic? The alcoholic suffers death many times over. Alcohol wrings the guts out of life, eats into the brain in such a way as to make the alcoholic blind to the truth. I served 12 years in prison, never suspecting that without alcohol I would not have been in prison at all. Had it not been for AA in prison ...I'll never know, but my educated guess is that I would not be alive today." - Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, "They Lost Nearly All," Ch 1 ("A Five-Time Loser Wins"), p 457. Today, like a prison inmate, we all experienced the multiple deaths of a drinking alcoholic in the form of losses of family, friends, jobs and milestone experiences like a child's birth or wedding, people and experiences that cannot be reclaimed. And, like an inmate, we may not even yet realize that we may never have suffered those losses because of alcohol. But, today, we are sober and in recovery, and the program has taught us to think now in terms of life because, in surrendering in Step One, we choose life over death. Now we must surrender the regrets and pain from those losses and anticipate the new life to come. And whatever life has planned for us, we can do it now because we are sober - because we chose life. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M. ************************************************** ~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~ ASKING FOR HELP The smartest thing a 12 Step member can say is, "Help me." ~ Anonymous ~ The weight of carrying the world on our backs has been removed from us in recovery. It is good to remember the world was never ours to carry in the first place. Our Program prevents us from setting ourselves up for failure. Most of us are used to being the Lone Ranger. Instead of silver bullets, we left empty lives. Our solitude taught us never to ask for help, always to go it alone. Our isolation produced a pitiful figure we would dress up in toughness. This, of course, was phony, because inside we were anything but tough. When we operate alone, pretending to be strong and in control, we set ourselves in motion to experience depression and pain. Stinking thinking flourishes in isolation. The key to unlocking the many gifts of the Fellowship is asking for help. There is strength, wisdom, hope, all waiting for us if we ask for help. I have learned to ask for help and to help when I am asked. ************************************************** ~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~ Strength and tolerance are partners. ~ Kahlil Gibran ~ We admire strength. As boys we looked up to the raw strength and power we saw in the biceps of big men and older boys. We tested our muscles and those of our pals. We worked at our own physical power to gain the respect of others. As grown men our admiration has grown up with us. Now we have a much bigger understanding of strength. We know that most strength can’t be measured in the size of our muscles. The strongest men are often the kindest and gentlest toward those around them. And often those who are most unsure of their strength try to steal power from others by intimidation, ridicule, and displays of force. A man stands tallest when he shows tolerance toward those who are different from him and those who are not popular with others. Some say that it builds strength to stand up for others who are vulnerable. Today I will show tolerance for those who are different or more vulnerable than I am. ************************************************** ~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~ Coming to trust our own judgment in volatile matters such as sex, intimacy . . . and the right values to pursue is... a demanding process. ~ Gail Sheehy ~ The people around us influence what we believe. Sometimes that’s okay, but what happens when we are with a group of friends who don’t all think alike? What do we believe then? Self-assessment, as suggested in the Fourth Step, helps us define ourselves. It helps us understand who we are and what we believe, separate from the others in our lives. We discover we are who we are! We aren’t who our friends want us to be, unless, of course, that fits us. Having values that we understand and feel comfortable with makes a difference in how we perceive ourselves in our relationships. We are empowered every time we speak from our own center. I will share with others who I really am today. My personal judgment in all matters will be lovingly revealed. ************************************************** ~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~ I can accept how I feel right now I can't change my mood just because I don t like feeling angry sad, or fatigued. It's not comfortable, but this is just the way I feel right now. True, at times there are some things I can do about my mood, but for the most part, I just have to go with it. Sometimes, it changes on its own. Sometimes it lingers painfully. My job, however, is to accept my emotion or mood (even when others around me don’t). I need to be with it, let it be, not act out. Once I accept it, then I'll know what to do about it (if anything). I will call a friend to talk about what I am feeling. ************************************************* ~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~ Peace and joy. ~ Bill Maloney ~ One Twelve Step friend closes a visit or conversation by wishing us “peace and joy.” It’s a simple blessing, but what more could anyone want than peace and joy? Peace comes from knowing we’ve tried our best to love and care about ourselves and others, that we’ve tried our best to make the world a better place, that we have our relationships, including the one with our Higher Power. Being perfect is not a prerequisite to finding peace. In fact, perfectionism usually destroys any chance of peace. When we are at peace with ourselves, our Higher Power, and the world, joy follows. There is joy in welcoming another sunrise or sunset. There is joy in a phone call from a friend, in going to a meeting, in telling someone “I love you.” Nothing fancy, elaborate, or grand; just simple “peace and joy.” How wonderful to have them, even if only for a few minutes, hours, or days. Sobriety has a wonderful way of helping these things happen. Today may I find peace and joy in my recovery, and may 1 share them and wish them for others. ************************************************** ~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~ No matter what accomplishments you make, somebody helped you. ~ Althea Gibson ~ Once two people were lost in a desert. Hours passed into clays. One morning, using their last reserves of strength, they made their way to a mountaintop so they could find shelter from the heat and die with some level of comfort. But when they got to the top, what they saw on the other side was astounding. It was a magnificent oasis of trees with ripened fruit and a crystal-clear waterfall. They raced to the oasis and drank their fill of water and ate fruit until their bellies were full. Then one lay down on the lush ground and sighed with contentment. But the other began to make vessels in which to carry water and gather fruit. “What are you doing?” asked the one who was relaxing. “I am returning to the desert so I can help others who are lost find their way here.” Recovery is based upon a fellowship that offers a mutually supportive alliance. It thrives upon the interdependency of its members and through a cooperative spirit I hat provides unity for achieving shared and personal goals. This, in turn, builds strength—both individually, and within the group as a whole. Today I will help others, and they will help me. ************************************************** ~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~ When we hate our enemies, we give them power over us—power over our sleep, our appetites, and our unhappiness. Our hate is not hurting them at all, but it is turning our days and nights into hellish turmoil. ~ Dale Carnegie ~ Hate is such a strong feeling, and it may be part of our black-and-white way of looking at things: right or wrong, yes or no, now or never, love or hate. Spending our precious nights nurturing a strong dislike for a co-worker, boss, teacher, parent, former lover, or even a stranger is a waste of time and energy. It becomes an obsession, and we know how easy it is for us to find an obsession and hold on to it dearly. Instead of making one pe6on our focus, we can think of all the people who are near and dear to us. We can visualize the faces of those who give us strength and hope and comfort and let their images stay in our minds and hearts. Instead of seeing one face in the crowd, I will see many. ************************************************** ~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~ Feeling self-important After being in the program for a while, some of us feel we know much more than the average member (and perhaps we do). But self- importance helps no one. What is important is working hard to stay clean and sober. By taking care of ourselves, we quietly set a good example. We need to carry the message and offer help, but it does not help to set ourselves above or apart. Am I letting go of any self-importance? Higher Power, help me to learn my weaknesses and be humble. I will practice humility today by God help me to stay clean and sober today! ************************************************** ~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~ Thank God, guilt was never a rational thing. ~ EDMUND BURKE ~ Newcomer Several days ago, I sent a check through the mail to pay my rent, but the landlord still hasn't received it. I spoke to him on the phone, and he said he'd be willing to wait and see if it reached him in the coming week. He didn't even hint that he didn't believe me, but that's what I imagined. Sponsor I once heard this story from a friend: Before Atlas (one of the gods in early Greek mythology) got the job of holding the world on his shoulders, someone else was supporting it. He said to Atlas, "There's something I have to do; please hold this for a moment," and walked away. For a moment, no one at all was holding up the world. Atlas stepped underneath and took the burden; he's been carrying the world ever since. But in that moment when no one at all had the world on his or her shoulders, nothing happened. It takes a lot of energy to assume responsibility for something we can't control. A situation like the one you're describing is valuable; it can show us how willing we are to shoulder the burden of guilt, even when no harm has been done. Having an alternative plan-such as stopping payment on the first check, sending a replacement, or finding another way to get it to its destination—is helpful; it can short-circuit the cycle of unnecessary guilt. Today, if things don't work out as expected, I make alternate plans. I don't take on the weight of the world. ************************************************** ~ THE EYE OPENER ~ The newspapers announced that Doctor Bob died on November 19th, 1950, but we of AA know different. He lives today in the grateful hearts of three hundred and fifty thousand alcoholics and probably three times that number of dependents of alcoholics. He will live forever for he was the founder of something Good and Good is eternal. His name would be out of place in cold, hard stone, but it is engraved forever in the hearts of a grateful and growing multitude. ************************************************** ~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~ Unselfishness Dear Lord, I must continually work toward unselfishness. To be unselfish is to be useful. When I am selfish, I am useless to myself, You, and others. Help me to stop thinking of only me and to stop hoarding not only material things but also my thoughts and feelings from others. Dear Lord, grant that I may practice what the Program teaches me. My life has been saved by what others have given me. I must, in turn, give it away to keep it. ************************************************* ~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~ TRIUMPH OVER DANGER Read Psalm 91. Thou shalt tread upon the lion and adder: the young lion and the dragon shalt thou trample under feet. Here the lion stands for a difficulty of which we are so afraid that it seems to us a very lion in our path, rushing at us in the open. How different, on the other hand, is the attack of the adder, or snake; for it creeps upon us in the dark. And here we are promised that our complexes, dragons though they be, shall be dissolved by the realization of God. There is nothing that can be done by any form of psychotherapy that cannot be better done by the Practice of the Presence of God. The last three verses are in themselves a glorious psalm of ringing joy and triumph. Because he hath set his love upon me, therefore will I deliver him. There is nothing hypothetical or contingent here. The statement indicates the fixed decision—I will deliver him. And why?—because he has set his love upon me. I will set him on high, because he hath known my name. In the Bible the "name" of anything means the nature or character of that thing. Now the nature of God is perfect, omnipresent, all-powerful good, boundless love; and to "know" this is to be set on hand above all our difficulties. The last two verses gather up all the implications and promises of this wonderful poem, and present them to the fearful or doubting heart as a song of triumph. He shall call upon me, and I will answer him: I will be with him in trouble; I will deliver him, and honor him. With long life will I satisfy him, and show him my salvation. ************************************************** ~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~ Too Far to Turn Back Now The march to freedom is irreversible. ~ Nelson Mandela ~ When the new nation of Hebrews was liberated from slavery in Egypt, they found themselves dead-ended against the Red Sea with Pharaoh's army in hot pursuit. Facing the prospect of drowning, some of the Hebrews shouted, "Let's go back to Egypt; there we will be slaves, but at least we'll have homes and food." Others argued that anything would be better than slavery, and they would rather take their chances than return to a condition that they had fought so hard to relieve. The rabbinical commentary on the Old Testament tells that some of the Jews walked into the Red Sea up to their necks before the water's parted. It was on their faith, the rabbis asserted, that the seas opened. Like the newborn Jewish nation, there is a part of us that is tempted to return to the old when we are frightened. As we face uncharted territory, our sense of insecurity bids us to take refuge in our past. But at such a moment of anxiety, we forget that the past did not work for us; that is precisely why we left it. It is but the voice of doubt and fear that urges us to be what we were rather than what we are growing to become. There is more to life than material security, and more to safety than the known. The only true security is in Spirit, and the only real safety in freedom. We may have all kinds of material comforts, but if our spirit is not at peace, we are homeless. And we may have nothing in the outer world, but if our inner world is lit by love, we are unshakably secure. Do not let fear tempt you to return to a condition you have outgrown. You have come too far to turn back now. Keep moving, step by step, day by day, and miracles will meet you to take you to the other side. Give me the strength to keep moving ahead until I realize my goal. I trust God to guide me to my new life and care for me always. |
August 20
Step by Step "We watch the alcoholic performing in a position of responsibility and we know that because he is drinking heavily and daily he has cut his capacities by 50 percent, and still he seems able to do a satisfactory job. And we wonder how much further this man could go if his alcoholic problem could be removed and he could throw 100 percent of his abilities into action. But, of course ...eventually the alcoholic loses all of his capacities as his disease gets progressively worse, and this is a tragedy that is painful to watch; the disintegration of a sound mind and body." - Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, Alcoholics Anonymous Number Three, Ch 12 ("The Keys of the Kingdom"), p 308. Today, can I remember or even acknowledge the gradual and steady disintegration of myself as a drinking alcoholic? If I cannot, I must remember to appreciate and even treasure that AA has moved me forward and beyond that abyss of irrevocable physical, emotional and spiritual hopelessness and self-destruction. And in comparing then to now, I can rely on my higher power to strengthen me should temptation arise. Today, despite or in spite of any problems I face, I must be grateful that I am not making them worse by drinking or using. I prefer whatever challenges I face sober instead of those I had drunk. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M. ************************************************** ~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~ COMMON SENSE We are what we think. All that we are arises with our thoughts. With our thoughts we make our world. ~ Buddha ~ Common sense is a good approach to living in our recovery program. The Tenth Step of our Program states that it is wise to pause often to analyze all our choices. Hurried remarks or actions can lead to errors. We learn that when we are wrong we promptly admit it. That admission, of course, reflects honesty and humility at their very best. We grow in understanding and effectiveness. A hasty remark or behavior can injure or anger the person at whom it is directed. All too often, this results in embarrassment and hurt. Our responsibility to carry the message does not entitle us to ram it down the throats of even those who badly need our advice. I should always think before I act or speak. Common sense reminds me, “to know what I know and to know what I don’t know is knowing what it's all about.” ************************************************** ~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~ To be tested is good. The challenged life may be the best therapist. ~ Gail Sheehy ~ We don’t learn anything new from successfully doing things that we have already mastered. We learn from our mistakes and the obstacles that appear in our path. They call on us to come up with new skills. We have certainly come to this path after facing plenty of challenges. And we know that a problem doesn’t guarantee that growth will be the outcome. A problem or a challenge can simply be a net loss until we turn it into an opportunity for growth. If we make a mistake and simply feel stuck in shame and regret, it leads to nothing more. But if we have an element of faith, we can look for its message. That is the path to greater strength and maturity. Today I will notice my mistakes and use them to grow. ************************************************** ~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~ There is no healing without forgiveness. I love the peace I feel with forgiveness. ~ Helen Casey ~ The program is helping us understand that when we feel resentful or angry, we are hindering our own recovery as well as our Higher Power’s plan for us. We cannot receive God’s full message if we are trapped by our hateful feelings. Why would we want to continue our agitation toward someone else, particularly when it means we can feel no peace? The answer lies in our struggle to be “right” in every situation. Being right rather than peaceful remains too important to us. But observing women who are serene will enlighten us about the possibilities for change the program promises. These possibilities can be ours if we change our attitude, develop the willingness to let go of past hurts, and live in a forgiving present. It may sound difficult to live in a forgiving present, but it’s not. We make the decision and then ask God to help us. Our hearts will heal and our resentments will be gone. Peace can become our permanent companion. Serenity is my goal today; forgiveness of others is the way I can achieve my goal. ************************************************** ~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~ I am finding forgiveness Now that I'm in dual recovery I am looking at my life more closely—and I can see more of the mistakes I've made. There are lots of smaller ones and some big ones, too. At times, it feels overwhelming. At times, I feel deeply discouraged. But it usually helps when I take the time to settle down and remember some points I've learned in the program. In recovery it is not uncommon to feel bad about past behavior. Everybody makes mistakes; I am beginning to learn from mine (and go on to explore who I am and what I want). Finally, even with my faults, I am accepted. I will write out an affirmation that says, "I accept myself—faults and all." ************************************************* ~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~ When I lose my Higher Power, I always find Him in the garden. ~ Jill H. ~ During active addiction, our spiritual lives were bankrupt. We knew just our own tiny comer of the universe, and it was usually a grim one. We were alone and lost. Now, in recovery, we find a great gift: a chance to develop a whole new relationship with a Higher Power. This can strengthen and sustain us during the worst of times, and fill our lives with love every day. Once, we doubted the existence of anything so positive, so loving. We felt if there was a Higher Power, it must be a cruel and vindictive force. Now, everywhere we look, we see evidence that a Higher Power exists, and can bring us hope and joy. For many of us doubters, prayer and meditation have become the most important and satisfying parts of our recovery program. Prayer in the morning helps us start the day with calm confidence, instead of confusion and anxiety. Prayer during the day helps us re-contact our spiritual selves, get back in touch with the important issues of our lives, and leave petty concerns. And prayer before sleep brings us peace to end our day, and communion with our Higher Power through the night. These are all parts of our newfound spirituality. Today let me be grateful to my Higher Power for bringing light and joy to my life. ************************************************** ~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~ Every survival kit should include a sense of humor. ~ Author unknown ~ It may be hard for you to find anything humorous as you work on your recovery. After all, addiction is quite serious, and how it affected you and impacted your life may be far from comedic. So when you hear others laugh at a meeting or listen as someone tells a lighthearted story of how she came to AA, you may feel as if these people are not taking their recovery seriously. You may think that your problems must be much worse than theirs because you cannot find the humor in them. Or you may believe that you must have lost much more in your life than others have. After all, how could they laugh if they had experienced devastations similar to yours? And yet without being able to approach your recovery with some sense of humor, it may be harder to rise above your difficulties. Humor has a way of diffusing conflict, lightening burdens, and easing resentment and anger. Humor can also provide a useful defense against difficulties, challenges, and hardships so that you are better able to rise above them, rather than let them defeat you. Humor helps to part the dark clouds in my life so the sun may shine. I will find humor in my recovery so I can approach it with a lighter heart. ************************************************** ~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~ You can observe a lot just by watchin’. ~ Yogi Berra ~ Our sight is one of our most valuable senses. We can lose our hearing and have our senses of smell, taste, and touch eliminated, yet our eyes will provide us with all the information we need for hearing, smelling, tasting, and feeling. We can picture in our minds a person we admire greatly. We can even visualize that person's expressions. We may be able to see that person's confidence, strength, and unity just in those expressions. We can imagine the person's lips moving and, without hearing a voice, we can see by the body movements how the person presents a being full of confidence and hope. Can we picture ourselves and how we come across to others just by what they see? Are our words trying to mask the sad expression on our faces? Are we honest with how we feel and show this? We can let people observe us and let them see openness and honesty through all their senses. Can the words I speak reflect who I am? Let me observe others and myself to truly feel he real person within. ************************************************** ~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~ Growing slowly Our Higher Power has a divine plan for each of us. It may take awhile for us to understand our place in it, however. We may not know what we are supposed to do; we only know what we’re not to do. We may feel empty at times. If during these painfully slow times, we can have faith that things will change, we can learn to endure the uncertainty with less fear. During such times it may seem to us that nothing is happening. But just as mountains finally emerged from the restless terrain, so will growth emerge in our lives after a period of stress. Growth can emerge only if we are patient. Is my faith strong enough for slow and steady growth? Higher Power, help me to be patient and faithful in this time of unsteady change and steady growth. Today I will strengthen my faith by God help me to stay clean and sober today! ************************************************** ~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~ It is hard to be good. ~ DIOGENES LAERTIUS ~ Newcomer I chair a meeting once a week now. It involves opening up, closing, getting a speaker, setting out literature and chairs, and making sure everything gets put away. Last night there were two or three people I'd have liked to talk with after the meeting, but they were already involved in conversations. By the time I finished the cleanup, they were gone. Sponsor One of the reasons that service is so strongly recommended to us in early recovery is that it gets us to a meeting and helps us connect with other recovering people. It sounds as if this service commitment has somehow backfired for you: you're feeling isolated at the meeting, perhaps a bit resentful. I have a few practical suggestions: you can ask at the break for volunteers to clean up and put things away, and you can postpone supervising or participating in the cleanup while you reach out to some people for conversation after the meeting. You might even consider letting the speaker know that you hope he or she will call on you; sharing is another way to combat feelings of invisibility. If we're taking care of ourselves, making sure that our own needs are being met, we can serve with ease and pleasure. Today, I take my need for sharing and connection seriously and place it high on my list of priorities. I seek opportunities to connect with others, rather than waiting for them to come to me. ************************************************** ~ THE EYE OPENER ~ Some time ago, I felt it necessary to make a record of the various sums of money owed me for my occasional handouts for a flop, or to get clothes out of hock, or to replace the false teeth lost or broken on the last binge. The total amount began to grow to staggering proportions and I became very unhappy—so unhappy, in fact, I tore the record up and now I am happy again. ************************************************** (NEW) ~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~ 1) The trouble with many of us is that in trying times, we stop trying. 2) AIDS: Addicts Injecting Dirty Syringes 3) People who say you can’t talk about drugs in an AA meeting are usually on them ************************************************** ~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~ Gentle and Soothing Higher Power, what have I cried out for since my first breath, if not serenity and tranquility’ Only when I made a decision of surrendering to Your will did my life change. I then made myself open. To the gentle serenity of Your peace, To the soothing tranquility of Your love ************************************************* ~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~ BLUEBEARD DRAWS THE LINE We make spiritual progress by putting God into every corner of our lives. Most people on the spiritual path are willing to give God a generous portion of their lives, but there is often one little comer where they do not wish the divine Light to shine. Bluebeard, you remember, kept open house, with the exception of one little room—and there he drew the line. His current wife, or any of the neighbors could go all over the premises and welcome, until they came to that one little room, the Bluebeard chamber, that was forbidden. Yet that one little locked-up room contained the tragedy of the house. The contents of the Bluebeard room need not be anything that we usually call horrible. There may just be selfishness, laziness, spiritual pride, or any of the more "respectable" but very deadly sins. There may be an old grudge or bitter remorse. Open every door of your soul to God. Have no place where the light of His presence does not shine. The secret things belong unto the Lord our God. . . (Deuteronomy 29:29). ************************************************** ~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~ Let’s Do Lunch When a needy person stands at your door God Himself stands at his side. ~ Hebrew Proverb ~ "I had the most wonderful day today," DeAnn told me. "I took a beggar to lunch. As I was about to enter a restaurant, he stood at the door and asked me for a handout. I felt inspired to ask him, "Would you care to join me for lunch?" His eyes nearly popped out of his head! Eagerly he answered, ‘Sure.' We had a good talk, and I gained some insight into his life. He told me he didn't look forward to sleeping on the street in the middle of winter, so on my way home I dropped him at a motel and paid for his room. I can't remember the last time I felt so much peace." While we may be prone to shy away from desperate or troubled people, a great treasure lies in serving them. Jesus said, "Whatever you do for the least of your brothers, you do for me." Many of us have high ideals for human service, but how many of us reach beyond our comfort zone to practice them? To care for the careless and house the homeless is to put love into action. My teacher Hilda once asked me, “What would you like to stand for in this life?" Immediately I answered, "Love." "Can you love those who are unkind to you or different from you?" she asked. I had to be honest. "Not always." "Then you have not yet mastered love," she told me "When you can love all equally, only then can you say you know how to love." I was inspired by DeAnn's example. The next day, I tried to connect more with the people I met in public. I smiled and said "Hi" to the policeman directing traffic in a construction zone; I tried to catch the eyes of the man taking my order for tires; and I chatted with a cook about his vacation plans. Funny, in the midst of a busy day of errands, those moments are the ones I remember. Give me the strength to go beyond judgment, that I may meet everyone in the domain of the heart. I behold the God in everyone and serve everyone as I would be loved. |
August 21
Step by Step "AA is not a plan for recovery that can be finished and done with. It is a way of life, and the challenge contained in its principles is great enough to keep any human being striving for as long as he lives. We do not, cannot, out-grow this plan. As arrested alcoholics, we must have a program for living that allows for limitless expansion." - Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, "Alcoholics Anonymous Number Three," Ch 12 ("The Keys of the Kingdom"), p 311. Today, I will not and cannot expect that being an "arrested alcoholic" will assure continued recovery and sobriety. We hear often but never too much that our program is not applied solely to sobering up but to daily living to maintain and enhance the quality of sobriety. If a day comes when I tinker with the dangerous folly that I have gone as far as I can with the program or have outgrown it, I am probably teetering on the edge of a slip or, more likely, a relapse. Today, AA becomes not only a program of recovery, but a daily way of life. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M. ************************************************** ~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~ READING Reading makes a complete person. ~ Anonymous ~ When early man first found a way to turn spoken words into symbols, knowledge became available to untold numbers. Through carvings on stone and scribblings on parchment, a method of communication became available to all who truly cared to learn. The simplest of words were used in the first efforts to teach mankind. Simplicity is still the recommended way of working a recovery program. We both read and hear that “the Program is simple but not always easy." Reading, study, and meditation can give us the basis of wisdom. The knowledge we gain from reading helps us understand ourselves and our world better. The wisdom we gather from books helps us on our journey of recovery. The fogginess and lack of concentration I had when I first started recovery has faded away. Reading has become an important part of my program. ************************************************** ~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~ Good thoughts bear good fruit, bad thoughts bear bad fruit—and man is his own gardener. ~ James Allen ~ Before we entered our program of healing and recovery, we didn’t recognize our thinking patterns as addictive and codependent. We simply thought our thoughts. Our attitudes seemed natural to us. Now we have learned from looking back that we had many self- serving and distorted ways of seeing life. Because of our need for control and our dependence on addictive ways, we had very nearsighted vision. Many of us indulged in a cynical and dark view of life. We used and controlled others to achieve our needs, and we were often ruled by fear. Now we are learning that we can cultivate a healthier and happier state of mind. We need not be constantly vigilant about our safety and comfort. We have friends who are genuine and trustworthy. We can rest assured that our Higher Power will always be with us. We are created to be on this earth, and we have a right to take a place among the rest of humankind. Today I am grateful for a healthy state of mind. ************************************************** ~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~ The deeper our roots, the farther from home we can safely travel. ~ Molly McDonald ~ When we think of our roots, we think of our family of origin, our birthplace, our youth. Who we are today, how we think about our opportunities, how we handle stress and pain—all are colored by the experiences of our past. But we are tak- lng several steps to develop new roots too. Learning from one another in this program helps establish the new root system. Understanding God’s role in our lives strengthens the root system. Adhering to the Steps and the principles of this program nourishes the root system. All three keep us grounded in the healthy, serene life we have chosen. These new roots will give us the strength we need to handle any situation. They will lighten our burdens. They will comfort us like the arms of a loving parent. They will make our steps certain and our vision hopeful. Venturing away from our home, whether it’s our home group or our place of residence, is easier when we acknowledge the importance of taking our new way of life with us. My life here today and in all my tomorrows will give me as much joy as my heart can contain. ************************************************** ~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~ I have a new perspective I have been working on my emotional and chemical health for a while now. I have insight into where I've come from, where I want to go, and what I need to do to get there. In brief, I have some perspective. To me, "perspective" means I don't have to fix everything right now. I don’t finish working the Twelve Steps in twelve weeks. There are no grades and no graduating classes in recovery. Perspective also suggests balance. For example, although I experience a dual illness, the illnesses do not define me. I am, first of all, a human being. To help me help my perspective, I will read the comics in today’s paper. ************************************************* ~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~ Give us the tools and tee will finish the job. ~ Winston Churchill ~ Chemical dependency is a disease without prejudice; no one is denied. But the tools of recovery are available for anyone, too. Anyone with a desire to remain sober and live a healthy life can be part of the miracle of recovery. Praying that our dreams will be realized is an important part of recovery. This conscious contact with God brings peace to our spirits and helps us overcome the struggles ahead. Accepting that God will show us the way, even when we are tempted to stray, brings us serenity as we face the hard work of recovery. As we build a relationship with God and use our prayers to help our dreams come alive, the miracle of recovery is always within our grasp. The common bond we share with our sponsor and Twelve Step fellowship, a bond of friendship, faith, and experience, can help support us and give us the help we need to face each new day. All of us have the tools we need to find serenity: honesty to help defeat denial, faith to conquer fear and uncertainty, sponsorship to end our isolation, and communion with our Higher Power to grant us peace. Today help me use all the tools available to me to make real progress in my recovery. ************************************************** ~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~ I used to love night best but the older I get the more treasures and hope and joy I find in mornings. ~ Terri Guillemets ~ No matter how challenging your day, when it draws to an end you can trust that a new day will dawn. With each dawn comes a clean slate. What has gone on before is in the past. What lies before you is the unknown. You have the opportunity to turn this unknown into something positive. Rather than see the new day as no different from any other day, you have the ability to make it into something magnificent, something beautiful, and something unlike no other. You do not need to spend money or invest a great deal of energy into facilitating such a change. All you need to do is approach the day with a different attitude. Make one small change in your morning routine or replace dread with excited anticipation, and such changes can make a world of difference. In the day that lies before you, if you trust that absolutely anything can happen, it will. Dawn ignites a flame of possibility that can enlighten and invigorate your entire day. I awaken to this day filled with hope and anticipation. ************************************************** ~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~ Fear less, hope more, eat less, chew more, whine less, breathe more, talk less, say more, love more, and all good things will be yours. ~ Swedish proverb ~ What do we have to do to get better in the program? Our first response may be to list all the healthy things we need to do: detach, meditate, pray, share, make phone calls, go to meetings, do the Steps, use the slogans, change behaviors. We soon have constructed an incredible list of dos and don'ts. But we can Keep It Simple. All we need to do is live One Day at a Time in a different way than before. There are many positive things we can do, but we don't need to do them all at once. Tonight we can just be ourselves. We don't need to make drastic changes or have dramatic mood swings or create radical resolutions. All that is asked of us is just to Keep It Simple. Tonight I don't need to make radical changes. Help me Keep It Simple in all the changes I want to make. ************************************************** ~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~ Practicing tolerance Everyone has a different opinion. No two people look the same. We all are different. Differences can cause us fear and set us apart from others, and we have no idea why. If addiction closes us down, recovery opens us up. In the program, we learn that we are all more alike than we are different. We learn to look for what we share. We learn that we know so little about ourselves (let alone others) and that judgments are not helpful. Can I live and let live? Higher Power, help me to see myself in others. I will practice tolerance today by God help me to stay clean and sober today! ************************************************** ~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~ The advantage of the emotions is that they lead us astray. ~ OSCAR WILDE ~ Newcomer I don't understand the slogan "Feelings aren't facts." I thought that we were supposed to pay more attention to our feelings in recovery. This slogan makes it sound like our feelings will lead us astray. Sponsor Acknowledging our feelings and letting them pass through us is different from clinging to them, assuming they'll never change, taking self-destructive actions based on them, or letting them lead us into self-pity, resentment, or despair. An amazing thing about feelings is that they change. If we're aware of having feelings that we dislike or that might lead us back to our addictions—such as angel fear, or sadness—we can safely discharge anger through physical activity or sharing; we can cry when we're moved to cry. In recovery our feelings aren't so frightening. We've seen them come and go. Many of us have the habit of reacting to present circumstances with an array of negative feelings we're still carrying from the past. In recovery, we recognize that there is more than one way to respond. Today, my repertoire of possible responses is large, as I go through my day with lightness. ************************************************** ~ THE EYE OPENER ~ There is no man alive who is a bigger fool than he who knows everything—even God can't teach such a one. This characteristic is common among alcoholics, and constitutes one of the greatest barriers to recovery. Our Program is best received by the humble heart and the attentive ear. We must do a lot of “un-learning” before we are ready to start learning this new way of living. ************************************************** ~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~ Surround Me With Your Love, God Surround me with Your love and guidance, O God; I am not safe without You. I am constantly exposed to this stressful world. I am in danger sometimes of losing the battle to the very shortcomings of my own nature. I can only surrender myself to You and believe that You will fulfill Your purpose in me. I surrender to Your will, O God, even when I am beaten down by depression and caught up by my defects and my own appetites threaten my recovery. You are my God, and You will not let me go. Your love , O God, is an answered promise. Your wisdom is an answered prayer. ************************************************* ~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~ GOD SAYS NOW God's, time for your demonstration is now. The time God wants you to be healed is now. The time God wants you to be in your true place is now. The Bible says that the day of salvation is now. God is ready the moment you are. There is nothing to wait for except the changing of your own consciousness. People often make the mistake of saying, "I know my demonstration will come at the right time.” But the only time to be harmonious and satisfied is now. The time to be happy is now and the place is here. Did not Jesus say, The kingdom of heaven is at hand, and by this he meant close by. Do not keep yourself out of the Kingdom of Heaven by inventing postponements, but change your consciousness now, for it can all happen in a moment. . . . that now it is high time to awake out of sleep: for now is our salvation nearer than when we believed (Romans 13:11). ************************************************** ~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~ Out of the Fishbowl It’s not trespassing when you cross your own boundaries. ~ Anonymous ~ While cleaning out her fishbowl, Mildred drew a few inches of water into her bathtub and placed her two fish in the tub. When she returned, Mildred found the fish swimming in a little circle the size of the bowl. Just as these fish had a huge bathtub to swim in, so do we live in an unlimited universe. Yet, like the fish, if we have accepted limits from our past, when we have the opportunity to expand our horizons, we may not challenge our limits, so we stay confined to an old pattern. We must constantly test our limits to see if they are real. If we have the courage to venture into uncharted territory, we will find treasures and freedom we would never have known if we didn't try. Buddha said, "To see what few have seen, you must go where few have gone." The "laws" and limits of the world exist by agreement only. When we release small thinking, we inherit the kingdom founded on the laws of love. Which laws do you choose to agree with? Jesus challenged us, "Choose ye this day whom you will serve." The world you live in will be as grand as the thoughts upon which you found it. Let me not rest content with a life less than the one You offer me. I pray to live in the grandest universe possible. I move beyond my past and claim a glorious future. I manifest magnificent results because I think unlimited thoughts. |
August 22
Step by Step " ...I never got into jail. I didn't get into a sanitarium, either. I wanted to die, and often I would think of ways. ...Once, when I called my analyst and told her I was contemplating death, she came over and tried to get me into a sanitarium. Frightened and shamed, I refused and sobered up temporarily. I was not mugged or manhandled. I did not resort to semi-prostitution for the price of a drink. But all these things could have happened. The sanitarium should have happened. I was not fit to be on the loose, and there was no one to commit me." - Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, "They Stopped in Time," Ch 13 ("Stars Don't Fall"), pp 411-12. Today, what came with my drinking: jail, psychiatric hospitals, electroshock, getting mugged, whoring myself for booze, a botched suicide attempt with whiskey and anti-depressants. These are things that can happen again, and such is the life that looms if I cave into temptation to drink again. Do I really want to risk going back there? No, and I don't have to! I'm in AA now, and it's given me the choice not to drink. If temptation or whatever weak moment catches me off guard, God grant me the wisdom to remember what active alcoholism is really about and not to romanticize those drinking days with any so-called good times. If those times had really been good, I would have had no reason to reach out to AA. But I did have a reason; pray I never forget it. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M. ************************************************** ~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~ RESPONSIBILITY I am responsible for myself; my recovery, my well-being, my happiness, all these things are, ultimately, my own responsibility. ~ Anonymous ~ Our Higher Power does not lay claim to our free will. We can choose not to be responsible and make ourselves more miserable by going to new levels of despair and depression. Or we can seize every opportunity for a better life. We are responsible. When we were newcomers and just getting started, we were generally very confused. We welcomed the support. Many of us were fed up with our lives and would have freely turned them in for a different model. But we learned to put into action what we were learning. We are responsible. Our sponsors give us good advice and sound instructions. We can choose to listen to the advice or not. We are responsible. Although we will always be dependent on God for our strength, it is up to us to ask God for that strength and do the necessary work to receive it. We are responsible. Today, I'll remember my Higher Power has given me free will to accept or reject responsibility. My life is better when I act responsibly. ************************************************** ~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~ Experience is not what happens to a man. It is what a man does with what happens to him. ~ Aldous Huxley ~ What does it take for a man to be called experienced? Who do we turn to when we look for someone who knows the ropes? We aren’t likely to seek out someone who has lived a chaotic life and still remains in the midst of his chaos. But if a man has been there and learned from his experience, he stands taller than everyone else. He is a kind of hero with much to teach us. Most of us have plenty of experience. But how can we learn from our experience? We need to stop, take time to reflect, and be honest with ourselves. When we are immersed in busy lives, never taking time to slow down, we cannot learn from our wealth of experience. We only pile one event upon another and run from one demand to another. We can change that by adding time for reflection and contemplation to our schedule. A day off with no demands is valuable for the soul. A retreat to a quiet place, time for fishing, or golf, or hiking is not self-indulgence when we understand that we are on a spiritual path. Twenty minutes of quiet every day for solitude and reflection makes us wiser, stronger men for the lives we are leading. Today I will take time to reflect, to be honest with myself, and to absorb the lessons of my experiences. ************************************************** ~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~ In a storm, the tree that bends with the wind is the one that survives to grow tall. ~ Brenda Schaeffer ~ Sometimes we don’t pick our battles rationally. Resistance from anyone, about anything, can make us miss the splendor of the moment. There is another way to live. We may not have observed it often in our own families, but we can learn the pattern nonetheless. It’s called nonresistance. Nonresistance means we stop trying to make something happen in only one way—our way. Nonresistance is refreshing. Suddenly we have more energy for fun activities, and we discover our presence is sought more often by the people we care about. Giving up trying to force situations and people to follow our life plan is like doubling the possibilities for our own life. What a gift letting the rest of the world alone proves to be. I won’t do battle with anyone today. I am in charge of only myself. ************************************************** ~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~ I want to be supportive I work Step Twelve to the best of my ability. But sometimes when a friend from group calls me for support, I don't feel like talking. Sometimes I'm simply tired. At other times, my friend may not seem to understand his problem or how to help himself; or perhaps he doesn't seem to listen or appreciate what I have to offer; and then again, maybe he expects too much of me. I know my reactions are valid and honest, but I need to step back from them a bit. It will help if I remember that (a) being asked for help is a gift; (b) at times, I am difficult to help too; (c) it’s OK to set boundaries; and (d) simply being present to another's pain is a loving, transforming experience. I will ask my higher power for strength to carry the message with patience and love. ************************************************* ~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~ My relationships depend on being honest with other people. My life depends on being honest with myself. ~ Angela L. ~ Before our recovery from alcoholism or drug addiction, we didn’t know what honesty was. We thought honesty meant not getting caught. We used honesty like money, spending just enough to get through the day. But in recovery, we can regain our integrity. Now we can think clearly and know it’s important to be straight with other people, but even more important to be straight with ourselves. Once, we could kid ourselves that our lives were in great shape, and keep using. We could pretend our problems were somebody else’s fault, and keep using. But we don’t deny our problems with chemicals any more. And we know that when we lie to ourselves, we die a little. We don’t like ourselves very much, then, and need to escape — back to our drug of choice. Before, being dishonest didn’t matter; we had nothing to lose. Now we’ve regained our health — physically, mentally, and spiritually. Dishonesty could cost us everything, even our lives. But now we also have our program, we have each other, and we have our Higher Power to remind us every day of the freedom honesty can bring. Today let me look in a mirror and see an honest person looking back. ************************************************** ~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~ Pick battles big enough to matter, small enough to win. ~ Jonathan Kozol ~ Have you ever thought that you could be much stronger if only you did not have so many weaknesses? Everyone faces challenges in their lives and embarks on journeys into the unknown. But it is not just those who consider themselves to be strong who are able to succeed. It is also those who are well aware of their weaknesses and who can convert these weaknesses into strengths who also are able to succeed. Perhaps you are intimidated by large projects or ones that come to fruition after a long period of time. First, create a plan to break down the project into several smaller projects. Or you can formulate a schedule that allows you to measure your progress at the end of each week. By making these simple changes, you can ignore your weaknesses, overcome a negative mind-set, and focus on your strengths. You can apply this exercise for every challenge you face in life. To convert your weaknesses into strengths, first view what it is you need to do. Next, consider how to meet the challenge by developing a step-by-step plan that works to your strengths. Then use your strengths to carry through with your plan. I can worry about my shortcomings, or I can work toward my strengths. Which do I choose? ************************************************** ~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~ Never measure the height of a mountain until you have reached the top. Then you'll see how low it is. ~ Dag Hammarskjold ~ What happens when we try to pick up a shell or pretty rock that’s under water? We may have a difficult time with the play of sunlight and the rippling of water. Because we're outside the water looking in, once our hands enter the water our perspective changes. Many times the overreacting side of our personalities may blow things out of proportion. Mountains become molehills, and vice versa. Because of our sensitivities, we may find it difficult to be objective during certain situations. Because we're taking risks and feeling more vulnerable, we may blindly build unneeded defenses. We can try to keep our perspectives in line by pausing before reacting. We can ask ourselves to identify what's happening and what action we need to take, if any. Instead of feeling threatened, subjective, or sensitive, we can use the extra time to get the proper perspective on a situation. Have I blown anything out of proportion today? I can review the situation in order to get the proper perspective. ************************************************** ~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~ Letting go If addiction is about control, recovery is about letting go. If addiction is about denial, recovery is about accepting what is. As we spend time in the program, we learn something unexpected and amazing: Life is so full of twists and turns, it’s easier to follow along than to try to straighten them out. It’s easier to have fewer expectations because, after all, we have no control over the future or the present. Can I practice letting go? Higher Power, help me to be open, flexible, and accepting in my recovery. Today I will let others make decisions and let go of God help me to stay clean and sober today! ************************************************** ~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~ Every day is a god, each day is a god, and holiness holds forth in time. ~ ANNIE DILLARD ~ Newcomer I still don't seem to have much control over certain feelings. I woke up this morning feeling afraid of things I have to do today. I know I just have to show up and do my part—the results are out of my hands—but I still have that old sinking feeling. Sponsor Old feelings and thoughts may continue for some time in recovery, but we don't have to give them the power they used to have. We're blessed with alternatives to our old addictive habits of thinking and behaving. When we wake in fearful anticipation of what the day will bring, it's time once again to take actions that have worked for us so far in recovery. We begin by expressing gratitude for the new day and for all the days that have led us to it. We can read some literature that comforts and lifts our spirits. We can make a program call. We can take time to nourish our bodies with food. These morning rituals help us put the day into perspective: we've survived, and we're not alone. This day will not be exactly like any othe4 before it or after it. What lies ahead is certain to hold surprises. I greet this day with celebration. I am alive. ************************************************** ~ THE EYE OPENER ~ Had Doctor Bob died in May 1935 he would have died a failure—a man who had wasted years of training and exceptional ability, a despair and a disappointment to his family, his profession and himself. But Doctor Bob lived for fifteen more years, and accomplished more in that short span than the combined efforts of his entire profession in the treatment of the baffling disease of Alcoholism. Medicine had treated the drunk like a guinea pig. Dr. Bob looked into the heart and soul of the man. He soon learned that the physical aspect of the case was the least and most temporary of the causes. ************************************************** ~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~ May I Be Happy I will sit down, quiet my mind, and connect with that which is greater than my small self and pray: May I be free from fear. May I be free from suffering. May I be free from my ego. May I be filled with loving kindness. May I be happy ************************************************* ~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~ YOU ARE ALWAYS TREATING You are continually "treating" your conditions with the thoughts that you hold concerning them. What you really think about anything, is your "treatment" of that thing. Many people have the idea that they are only "treating" when they call it "treating," but no matter what you call it, your thought concerning any subject is a treatment. This is the reason visible conditions are always the expression of invisible thought. If you will begin systematically to treat every side of your life with a series of positive, correct thoughts, and keep to this practice for even a few weeks, you will be amazed to find how much everything will change for the better. . . . be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind . . . (Romans 12:2). ************************************************** ~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~ The Power to Heal The art of medicine consists of amusing the patient while nature cures the disease. ~ Voltaire ~ A Band-Aid television ad suggests that the healing energy we need is already within is. Our job, the ad implies, is simply to cooperate with the universal healing force. All we need to do is protect ourselves while nature effects the cure. “Cuts and wounds,” manufacturer Johnson & Johnson reminds us, “heal twice as quickly when they are covered with a Band-Aid.” Their new slogan is “The Power to Heal." What a delight to see the world of pharmaceuticals coming closer to the truth! A Course in Miracles asks: Who is the physician? Only the mind of the patient himself. The outcome is what he decides that it is. Special agents seem to be ministering to him, yet they but give form to his own choice...They are not actually needed at all. The patient could merely rise up without their aid and say, "l have no use for this." There is no form of sickness that would not be cured at once. While doctors can facilitate the healing process, the only true healer is God. Even the mending of a small cut is a miracle! What human being has the power to recreate it? To be healed, we do not need to add anything to who we are or what we have. We simply need to become still and allow nature to reinstate us to our rightful condition of well-being. I open myself to be touched by Your heating power. I lay aside all idols and invite the presence of love to restore my true nature of wholeness. Health is my natural state, I accept it now. |
August 23
Step by Step "Until I could accept my alcoholism, I could not stay sober; unless I accept life completely on life's terms, I cannot be happy. I need to concentrate not so much on what needs to be changed in the world as on what needs to be changed in me and in my attitude." - Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, "They Stopped in Time," Ch 17 ("Doctor, Alcoholic, Addict"), p 449. Today, grant me understanding and accept that my alcoholism and recovery depend on ME to make fundamental changes internally - and that those changes will not come by the world changing to accommodate me. If I have not yet accepted that I must live life on life's terms or if I have not accepted or surrendered to the basic truth that I am powerless over alcohol, I am undoubtedly going to stumble not too far out of the starting gate. I cannot expect the realities of life to change any more than I would change myself to comply with someone else's expectations of me. Thus, for the basic changes that I must make for a quality sobriety, I have to look inward to begin making those changes. Today, I scrap my expectations of the world and everyone to meet MY standards; instead, I ask if maybe the problem isn't ME. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M. ************************************************** ~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~ QUIET TIMES Listen to the sounds of silence. ~ Paul Simon ~ Sharing experiences, strengths, and hopes, and reading during recovery is very important. But just as important are the times of silence we allow ourselves to think over the information we're receiving during times of sharing and reading. Before recovery, being quiet may have meant having to face our problems alone. We avoided being by ourselves. We may think we don't have time for silence in our busy lives. But quiet moments in the morning or evening for meditation, moments going to and from work, moments spent doing household chores, moments during exercise-all of these moments add up to the precious times of silence we need to absorb all we are learning, feeling and experiencing. I now look forward to my quiet times. I am learning how to relax and be with my Higher Power in prayer, meditation and reflection. ************************************************** ~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~ When I found out I thought God was white, and a man, I lost interest. ~ Alice Walker ~ On our path, spiritual development and renewal is constant. We make time for conscious contact with God as we understand God, and our understanding keeps forming. Our childhood images of God may be too limited. That doesn’t mean we have to toss out the whole concept, but our understanding has to grow up with us. To some, God is the spirit and the feeling of camaraderie in group. To some, God is the God expressed in their traditional religion. Others say that God is simply beyond all definition, an ultimate that exceeds our rational mind. Others say God is the sense we have that we are never alone. And to some, God is found in the beauty of nature. This program of healing and recovery guides us to make a decision to turn our life and our will over to the God of our understanding. And we can expect that as the relationship grows so will our understanding. Today I am grateful for the presence of God as I carry on with my life. ************************************************** ~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~ Advice from others applies to them. ~ Georgette Vickstrom ~ Those of us who share this program are learning liow to care about others, and it is natural that we want to help one another. Of course, that means we may suggest, sometimes too strongly, what we think a friend ought to do. We are frequently on the receiving end of similar suggestions. We can be glad that others want to help. We suffered alone with our problems for far too long. However, no one’s advice can exactly fit our situation. Nor can ours fit theirs. The perspective that guides each of us is unique to our experiences. It is never wrong to offer our support. Nor is it wrong, if asked, to share what we would do if the problem were ours. But to say to anyone, “Here is what you should do,” is harmful. Let God play God. I will not give unwanted suggestions or advice to any-one today. God is the best guide for each of us. ************************************************** ~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~ I can put up with some side effects I knew I didn't want to take psychiatric medication. I knew there would be problems. That's why I hesitated at first-and I was right. Now I feel edgy and tired out much of the time. I'm often thirsty And to top it off, my sex drive is diminished. I don't like trading in one sort of problem for another. On the other hand, the medication is helping to reduce my symptoms. I don't feel as sad and I'm sleeping better. Most of the day I can function pretty well. I guess relief from my major symptoms is worth putting up with some side effects. I will follow my medication regimen carefully and call my doctor with any questions. ************************************************* ~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~ Every day is a holiday. ~ P. Gustavson ~ The janitor in a school was an extremely positive, spiritual person. When asked how his day was going, he said in a loud, cheerful voice, “Every day is a holiday.” When overloaded by work or family schedules, what a great thought to remember. Every day is a holiday! The original meaning of “holiday” was simply a happy or festive day, a day to celebrate, to rejoice, to give thanks. In recovery, every day is a holiday, a holy day, something special. Each day is a gift, given by a Power greater than ourselves, to use as we choose. What a change from active addiction, when every day was misery. Thinking of each day as special helps us be grateful, and to give thanks for every day in our new lives. As we grow in recovery, we look forward to every day with joy and excitement. Thanks for today. Let me live it as a holiday, a day to celebrate recovery and sobriety. ************************************************** ~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~ Worrying is like a rocking chair. It gives you something to do, but it gets you nowhere. ~ Glenn Turner ~ You may be someone who is in a constant state of worry. But where has all of your worrying gotten you? Worry prevents you from living in the present. It does not rob your time from yesterday—that is already over and done with—and it cannot take anything from tomorrow, because that has not yet arrived. What worry does is sap the life of the day you have before you. While many people worry about a lot of things, worry is based predominantly on self-doubt. Worry is the voice in your head that prevents you from believing in yourself. Even though you have friends and family who truly think you are special, worry strives to convince you that you are not as good as others think you are. Worry is the “but” that butts into praise you receive, achievements you make, and the time you have before you. Today ease your worry by replacing some of worry’s buts with positive thoughts of your own. Whenever the voice of worry tells me I am not good enough, I will answer, “But I am good enough, and here are some things that prove that.” ************************************************** ~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~ You want me to succeed so much. Could you understand if I failed? . . . Could you love me if I failed? ~ Sister Mary Paul ~ What is it we fear the most about success? Sometimes we fear we'll fail. But failure isn't as scary as losing the admiration, respect, or even the love of those we're trying to impress. We sometimes look outside of ourselves too much for the love, rewards, and approval for our actions. We may feel we're not good enough, so we set nearly impossible feats in which we strive to succeed. Tonight, we're a success. No matter what we've done or what we'll do, we are a success. If we've set out to do something today and fallen short of our goals, we haven't lost the admiration, respect, or love of those around us. There are those who will love us whether we fail or succeed, for they are the ones who love us for ourselves and believe in us. Their love will always be there. Who loves me and believes in me? Tonight I can be grateful for their love and belief and know that is the greatest success I can achieve. ************************************************** ~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~ Treasuring our triumph It is said that the tougher the problem, the greater the triumph. Some of us feel that we would gladly have forgone the conflict and the triumph. If that is how we’re thinking, we have not fully experienced the triumph. Our lives have ultimate value. Getting clean and sober after years of addictive living is an amazing and wonderful achievement. It is also said that heaven knows the proper price of its goods. Can I realize the full value of what I have done? Higher Power, help me to love and respect myself for the life-saving work I have done. I will express my gratitude for my being clean and sober today by God help me to stay clean and sober today! ************************************************** ~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~ I am my own universe, I my own professor. ~ SYLVIA ASHTON-WARNER ~ Newcomer I've been trying to meditate every day this week, closing my eyes and concentrating on my breathing. I was hoping that it would help me with the depression I've been feeling on and off, A strange thing has been happening, though. Instead of feeling relaxed and refreshed, I become oddly disconnected and I start to panic. Sponsor Obviously, something that causes panic isn't a good choice for us, no matter how highly it's been recommended. Anyone experiencing depression is not advised to meditate with the eyes closed for more than fifteen minutes at a time. If meditating with eyes closed feels disorienting and upsetting, we can try another method; there are numerous alternatives. Meditating with open eyes, focusing our vision on a natural object such as a shell, flame, or flowe4 can bring a sense of inner peace. Meditating while walking or chanting a mantra aloud can also be good choices for those suffering from depression. I'm glad that you're alert to the instinct that's telling you not to force situations. Today, I trust my intuitive sense of what I need. ************************************************** ~ THE EYE OPENER ~ Alcoholism is now recognized as a disease, and this recognition brought about countless studies and experimentations on the part of the physicians, scientists, educators, employers, etc. Clinics are being set up, new medicines, new cures, new therapeutics are being experimented with. There are almost as many theories as there are alcoholics. There are almost as many failures as there are theories. Alcoholics Anonymous is no theory, it is a proven fact. ************************************************** ~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~ Expectations Higher Power, help me stop expecting so much from myself. I set unrealistic standards, and when they are not met, unhappiness follows. Help me be true to myself and only expect what I am capable of doing. As I grow in recovery and do my assignments every day, I am able to do more. Your will provides realistic goals. Your will provides what I need to succeed. ************************************************* ~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~ YOUR INVISIBLE DICTAPHONE Your destiny depends entirely upon your own mental conduct. You may think that you know this already, but if you do not act upon it, it is certain that you do not really know it. Most people would be amazed to discover how much negative thinking they indulge in. Thought is so swift and habit is so strong that unless you are very careful you will constantly transgress. Suppose that, quite without your knowledge, an invisible dictaphone were strapped on your shoulders the first thing tomorrow morning, and that you carried it about all day until the last thing tomorrow night. Then suppose that this record were played over to you so that every word you had uttered for a whole day was repeated to you. Well, if you are an average human being you would probably be embarrassed, yet it really does happen that everything we say, and think, and do, is recorded—in the subconscious mind—and our daily experience is simply that record being played over to us by the Law of Being. Never forget that the circumstances of your life tomorrow are molded by your mental conduct of today. I have chosen the way of truth . . . (Psalm 119:30). ************************************************** ~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~ Don’t Drop the Baby The peace of God is my one goal. ~ A Course in Miracles ~ Author Hugh Prather likens the peace of God to a tender infant. "If you were carrying a little baby," Hugh suggests, "you would make that child your first priority. If someone bumped into you on the street, you wouldn't just drop the baby to follow the person and yell at him. And if your car broke down, you wouldn't abandon the child as you walked to get help. In the same way, we cannot afford to put the peace of God aside for any worldly distraction. The peace of God is more valuable than anything the world has to offer, and we must protect it as consistently as a tender infant." What have you placed before the peace of God? Money? Anger? Fear? Time? Possessions? Drama? Romance? Guilt? Sex? Work? If you've traded joy for any passing entity or experience, you've struck a poor bargain indeed. Make an inner commitment to hold peace above all else for one day. It will be the most beautiful day of your life. Beloved God, I want to know Your love fully. Help me to remember You above all else. The peace of God is my one goal. Any priorities are in order. |
August 24
Step by Step "At last, acceptance proved to be the key to my drinking problem. ...When I stopped living in the problem and began living in the answer, the problem went away. From that moment on, I have not had a single compulsion to drink." - Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, "They Stopped in Time," Ch 17 ("Doctor, Alcoholic, Addict"), pp 448-49. Today, after living so long in the problem of drinking, let me understand that now, as an alcoholic who does not drink, I am free to live in the answer - sobriety. By living in sobriety, I am free of fighting the temptation to drink again, free of the fear of being caught and of shame, anger, resentment, loneliness and hopelessness. The problem of drinking offers no freedom; the answer of sobriety does. Let me think and re-think until I understand the fine line between living in the problem of resisting temptation to drink and living in the answer of sobriety and, in understanding, I can begin to loosen the problem's grip on me and embrace the answer. And the answer is AA and the principles it suggests. Today, I no longer have to fight or live with the problem; I have an answer. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M. ************************************************** ~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~ MEETINGS Seven days without a meeting makes one weak ~ Anonymous ~ The amount of time we invested in our addiction over the years was considerable. We spent countless hours feeding our addiction, thinking about feeding it, and trying to recover from the episode. A great investment of time was made. We need to consider the idea that a tremendous amount of time invested in recovery is a wise choice. This disease of ours has caused deep wounds. Healing will take time. Just because we put the chemical or behavior down does not mean they will put us down. Our Program describes them as cunning, baffling, and powerful. Some old-timers add patient, too. The point is made in many cases that those that don't spend the time, don't make it. Ours is not a solitary Fellowship. We don't work our Program alone. The meetings we attend are very important to us. I will put as much energy into my meeting attendance as I once put into my active addiction. ************************************************** ~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~ Storytelling is giving shape to the amorphous chaos of life. ~ Anonymous ~ When we put words to what has happened to us, we can begin to learn from our experience. We carry images within us that are the building blocks of our stories, but we only begin to make sense of them when we put them into words. Talking with a trusted friend, or speaking in a meeting, or telling a therapist about our experiences gives them a shape. The words give us a way to understand, and they build a bridge to others. We may feel deeply alone if we keep our memories and images to ourselves. When we begin to talk, as we tell our story, we learn from our own words, and they take us deeper into our truth. We don’t tell our story only once. We do it over and over again. It brings relief from the traumas and releases us from the prison of our past. Each time we talk, even recounting the same events, we are somewhat different because we have grown, and we see our own story from a new perspective. Listening to other men’s stories and telling our own is one of the special tools for spiritual growth that we use on this recovery path. Today I will talk to someone about an experience or a feeling. ************************************************** ~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~ The subconscious can be programmed to procure the results you desire. ~ Susan Smith Jones ~ The subconscious absorbs events in the external world as well as our internal world. It’s never al rest. Yet we do have power over what we cultivate in the recesses of our subconscious. There are some tools we can use to weed out unhealthy messages from our subconscious. One is to replace negative thoughts with thoughts that nurture us. Another is to develop affirmations that boost our self-esteem, and to practice saying them while in a meditative state or standing before a mirror. Maybe the most effective of all tools is visualization. Do it this way: Carefully paint the portrait of the woman you want to be in your mind. See her in myriad situations, always performing superbly. Dwell on her strengths, her capabilities in every experience. Believe in her and she will become real. I am who I think I can be today. My imagination will shape the person I desire to be. I am in charge. ************************************************** ~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~ My life isn't easy, but it's mine and it’s real For quite some time, my life consisted of fighting my psychiatric illness, mainly by getting high. But in trying to control the emotional—almost physical—pain, I was losing control of my life. I was caught in a web. These days it can still be a struggle—stress, setbacks, holding down a job—but now I have the right tools and I know where I am: I'm abstinent and stable in dual recovery I am doing the work I need to do—counseling, Step meetings—and I'm on the right path. Today I will pray for continued strength and the willingness to trust my higher power with my future. ************************************************* ~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~ The only real mistake is the one from which we learn nothing. ~ John Powell ~ A sense of humor is one part of us that is rescued by recovery from the dulled life of addiction. Laughter heals us and separates us from suffocating false pride. As we mend emotions, we gladly let go of our need to be right all the time. We move away from that old, fearful defensiveness, and come to accept our mistakes. It is endearing when we relate to one another as a result of our human imperfections. This is the spiritual path we have chosen over self-centered preoccupation. When we laugh we are truly living in the moment, and freeing ourselves, if only for a moment, from our worries. Only humans have the ability to recognize and appreciate humor. Of all animals, only humans laugh. Laughter relieves the pressure of a closed mind and in that moment, when we are most teachable, we learn that our mistakes are not disasters, but simply by-products of our growth. Today let me share laughter over my mistakes with another person. ************************************************** ~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~ It wasn’t mining when Noah built the ark. ~ Howard Ruff ~ To stay dean and sober, it is vital to create a foundation of support that will help you to strengthen your commitment and resist the temptation to use or abuse. Become active in your group by helping before or after meetings and make new friends. Together you can enjoy activities that are free from drugs or alcohol. Those who are clean and sober have experience and wisdom that support your recovery. Use a daily book of meditations for guidance each day. Read materials available at meetings so you can stay focused on your recovery. Read—or reread—the Big Book, From time to time you may need to attend events where alcohol is served or where your former drinking buddies will be. If you can invite someone from the program, you will have a supportive guest to be with you. If you cannot, arrange to get together with your sponsor immediately after the event. Connect with your Higher Power through prayer and meditation. Share your feelings at meetings. Spend regular, quality time with your sponsor. Accept the support and guidance you are given, but remember that your recovery is your responsibility. I will use tools of support for my recovery. ************************************************** ~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~ The message is, "It's okay if you mess up. You should give yourself a break.” ~ Billy Joel ~ The song "You're Only Human” was written to help teens eliminate suicide as an option to life's problems. It tells them it's okay to make mistakes. In fact, because we're human, we're supposed to make mistakes. Mistakes don't last forever. They are small events in the larger master plan of life. While a mistake may hurt another or affect the outcome of a situation, a mistake is not so earth-shattering and catastrophic that we can't learn something from it, forgive ourselves, and let it go. There's no reason to feel we need to punish ourselves if we do something wrong. It’s the mature person who can look at a mistake and shrug it off easily. It's the perfectionistic, people-pleasing person that demands retribution for mistakes and never wants to forget them. Which is easier for us to be? Tonight I can look at my mistakes and know they are signs of my humanness. It is healthy to make a mistake every once in a while and be able to accept it as a normal part of living. ************************************************** ~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~ Seeking a Higher Power In the Twelve Step program, Step Two sug-gests that we seek a Higher Power (whom some of us choose to call God) to help us with the problems that we can’t handle alone. And here some of us—for very old and deep reasons—get stuck. God need not be male, nor old and bearded. God need not be judgmental or punishing. The fact is, in the Twelve Step program we can let go of our old notions about God. The fact is, we can decide what we want our Higher Power to be to get the help we need. Can I begin seeking a Higher Power? I now realize I have a serious problem. I see that I cannot recover on my own. I need help. Today I will begin to explore my spiritual beliefs by God help me to stay clean and sober today! ************************************************** ~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~ Use what language you will, you can never say anything but what you are. ~ RALPH WALDO EMERSON ~ Newcomer Since so many of us are cross-addicted, why are some meetings closed? Sponsor Though a meeting may be listed as "closed," it's open to anyone who has a desire to stop using the substance or compulsive behavior that is the focus of the meeting. For example, if I'm a recovering compulsive overeater who has begun to explore my relationship with alcohol or drugs, I may attend closed meetings of AA or NA. However, observers, journalists, spouses, and interested friends, all of whom are welcome at "open" meetings, may not attend closed meetings. The existence of closed meetings offers a greater sense of security to those who are especially concerned about their anonymity and to those who prefer to keep discussions focused on a specific addiction. Rather than engage in controversy about this issue, we need to respect the collective conscience and guidelines of the particular groups we attend. We can make an effort to find meetings where we feel comfortable telling the truth about how we got here. If we're attending an open meeting merely as a visitor, we listen, but refrain from sharing. We respect the anonymity of those present and don't carry news of what we've heard or seen, even to members of another anonymous fellowship. Today, there's a place that's right for me; I go there and know that I'm at home. ************************************************** ~ THE EYE OPENER ~ When a member of AA can take his first inventory and compare it with his last and then truthfully say, “I am not now that which I have been,” he has arrived at a definite stage of improvement. When the next one shows still more improvement, then he is definitely on the Program. When this improvement continues until there is no more room for improvement—look out below. ************************************************** ~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~ Facing Indecision Dear God, help me during the day when I face indecision. Help me when I do not know which course to take. I ask You for inspiration, an intuitive thought, or a decision. You have instructed me during these times of indecision not to struggle, to relax and take it easy. You will provide the right answers. This I pray. ~ Adapted from material in Alcoholics Anonymous, Fourth Edition, page 86 ~ ************************************************* ~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~ ALTER YOUR LIFE There is no need to be unhappy. There is no need to be disappointed, or oppressed, or aggrieved. There is no need for illness or failure or discouragement. There is no necessity for anything but an abounding interest and joy in life. As long as you accept a negative condition at its own valuation, so long will you remain in bondage to it; but you have only to assert your birthright as a free man or woman and you will be free. Success and happiness are the natural conditions of mankind. It is actually easier to demonstrate these things than the reverse. Bad habits of thinking and acting may obscure this fact for a time, just as a wrong way of walking or sitting, or holding a pen or a musical instrument may seem to be easier than the proper way, because we have accustomed ourselves to it; but the proper way is the easier nevertheless. Unhappiness, frustration, poverty, loneliness are really bad habits that their victims have become accustomed to bear, believing that there is no way out, whereas there is a way; and that way is simply to acquire good habits of working with the Law instead of against it. Open thou mine eyes, that I may behold wondrous things out of thy Law (Psalm 119:18). ************************************************** ~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~ Whose Birthday? Give to every other human being every right you claim for yourself. ~ Robert G. Ingersoll ~ I took my eight-year-old goddaughter to the toy store to buy her a birthday present. When I told her, "Pick out anything you like,” she ran to the display of Barbie dolls. "But you already have 32 Barbie Dolls!" I reminded her. "You have a blonde Barbie, a black Barbie, a cheerleader Barbie, and a beach Barbie, not to mention a Barbie house, a Barbie hot rod, and a Barbie executive office. Why don't you get something different?" She clutched a new Barbie and answered, “But I want a Barbie.” My first instinct was to tell her to put the doll back on the shelf, but then I realized something important: It was her birthday, not mine l had told her to pick out whatever she wanted, and this was her choice. It was not my place to judge what made her happy. Even if she had 300 Barbies and this was her idea of a great birthday present. I had to honor her choice. True service means surrendering our idea of what someone else should want, and supporting them in their vision of happiness. With the exception of helping someone do something that will hurt them, we love most genuinely by standing behind, not between, others and the choices they make. We must not impose our visions over theirs, but support them in manifesting their dreams. Help me love and support my brothers and sisters for who and what they are rather than what I would have them be. I delight in affirming others on their path of joy. |
August 25
Step by Step "And acceptance is the answer to all my problems today. When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, thing or situation - some fact of my life - unacceptable to me, and I can find no serenity until I accept that person, place, thing or situation as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment." - Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, "They Stopped in Time," Ch 17 ("Doctor, Alcoholic, Addict"), p 449. Today, accept as a requirement of my recovery that I am absolutely powerless over alcohol and I can never drink again, accept the consequences of my drinking and that I alone am responsible to them, and accept that recovery is more than physical and includes a massive rebuilding of my emotional and spiritual character. If I am simply IN recovery but not WITH it and carry even a hidden resentment that I cannot drink safely or a sense of being wronged because I have to clean up the mess I allowed alcohol to make of my life, the program's promise of serenity with myself and the world around me will be elusive. Today, I seek the humility to ask for absolute - and unconditional - acceptance that my alcoholism is MY responsibility, and so it is with my recovery. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M. ************************************************** ~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~ SELF-CENTEREDNESS Self-love is the greatest of all flatterers. ~ La Rouchefoucauld ~ Those who follow the principles of the Program have learned that self-centeredness is possibly one of their biggest problems. Since we come to believe that we cannot succeed in staying abstinent by our own efforts alone, we realize that self-idolizing is the worst possible tool to make vital friendships. There is little doubt that thinking "me above all" will make us inhabitants of glass houses that are always in danger of being shattered. Selfishness and loneliness are created by an oversupply of concern for who we are and what we will be. Selfishness and self-centeredness leads to a complete failure in working the Program. We are encouraged in recovery to become other-centered, thus getting our minds off ourselves. When my ego causes me to indulge in self-flattery, let me remember that when I fall in love with myself, I won't have any rivals for my affection. ************************************************** ~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~ Noble deeds and hot baths are the best cures for depression. ~ Dodie Smith ~ When we change our lives, we give up old patterns. Some of these old patterns, as harmful as they may have been, were like our best friends. We could turn to them for comfort and escape. After giving them up, and after the first elated feelings of liberation, we may also have to deal with the depression and grief of loss. What should we remember at these times? First of all, depression has a beginning, and it has an end. In the midst of it, we may feel that nothing will ever look good again. That is not so. The loss of energy, the dark mood, the hopelessness—all will pass and we will regain our vitality and joy of life. Second, it helps to stay active. Physical activity is one of the best medicines for a depressed mood: vigorous walks, physical labor, or a good workout at the gym. Another kind of activity is helping others, reaching out to those in need of companionship and a helping hand. It is surprising how good it feels to make a difference in another person’s life. The third thing we can do is stop our negative thoughts. We can simply interrupt a train of thought in the same way we might interrupt a conversation and change the subject. Finally, we can take comfort in the faith that our Higher Power will provide what we need in the long run. Today I will take good care of my mental well-being. ************************************************** ~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~ When my heart is overflowing with gratitude, there is no room for fear. ~ Kathy Kendall ~ Feelings can consume us. Sometimes we have positive feelings; other times we have negative feelings. The truth is, we can’t harbor opposing emotions at the same time. If we are fearful, we can’t be Joyful and enthusiastic about what lies ahead. Conversely, if we are joyful and enthusiastic, we can’t be fearful about what lies ahead. The good news is that our feelings don’t control us. It’s quite the opposite. While it may seem that feelings overcome us, the truth is, they follow our thoughts. In other words, what we manufacture in our minds gives rise to our feelings. That means, of course, that we don’t have to harbor any feeling one minute longer than we choose. Deciding to feel grateful is just as easy as it is to feel hurt or resentful or fearful. We may not have all we desire, but we do have multiple blessings, each one of us. The more we give thanks to this program and our Higher Power, the more our blessings will multiply. I will feel at one with my Higher Power today. I am safe, clean and sober, and in caring hands. There is nothing to fear. ************************************************** ~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~ I need to eat right to stay in recovery I used to eat whatever was easy to get—especially junk food—as long as I got full (sometimes too full). Other times I'd lose my appetite and skip meals. It all depended on my mood and on whether I was intoxicated. Now that I'm in dual recovery I feel differently about what and how I eat. I now recognize how important it is to eat a healthy diet to stay strong, both physically and emotionally (these are not separate). Moreover, instead of abusing my body or ignoring it like I did before, in recovery I want to help it. I will list three healthy foods I want to eat more of these days. ************************************************* ~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~ Not my will, but Thine, be done. ~ Luke 22:42 ~ To surrender our own will may at first seem like giving up life itself. It seems so risky to relinquish control! We may resist at first, and desperately look for an easier, softer way, before we realize we must simply surrender. In time we come to believe our Higher Power can be trusted to comfort and support us, to bring order into our lives on a day-to- day, minute-by-minute basis. Before, we lived in chaos and felt terribly alone. In recovery, we can find calm and safety when we surrender our wills and our lives to our Higher Power. We can witness the powerfully positive results every day. Now the real healing begins. Today Lord, help me be aware of Your will in my life each day. Give me the courage to risk letting go of my own will and the strength to follow Your will in recovery. ************************************************** ~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~ One must marry one’s feelings to one’s beliefs and ideas. That is probably the only way to achieve a measure of harmony in one’s life. ~ Napoleon Hill ~ Imagine that the four tires on your car symbolize your spirit, your knowledge, your dreams, and your feelings. If even one of these is out of balance, your car will not run smoothly. It will need more guidance to stay on the road. It will use up more gasoline. And, over time, each of the other tires will wear unevenly. In your recovery you may have three tires that are usually in balance with one another, and one that is not. If you are holding onto feelings of resentment, anger, or sad-ness, it can be difficult to embrace the present. If you are suppressing your feelings rather than expressing them, it can be harder for you to stay focused. And if you believe that the feelings of others are more important than your own, you may have a difficult time accepting and gaining better understanding of what it is that you need. Your tire of feelings is out of balance. Even if it is hard for you to express your feelings, write down how you feel. The more you can feel, the greater the balance you can achieve in your life. I will not ignore my feelings. I will let them out so I can feel them. ************************************************** ~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~ To get peace, if you want it, make for yourselves nests of pleasant thoughts. ~ John Ruskin ~ A bird builds its nest by first searching for the perfect twigs, string, and papers. Then it patiently interweaves these materials until its nest achieves the right shape, size, depth, and warmth. Once completed, the bird ceases its work and spends its time nestled comfortably in its home. To be at peace with ourselves, we have to construct our own nest. This nest doesn't always have to be a place. It can also be found in freedom from negative thinking. Or it can be a time we set aside solely for our enjoyment and relaxation. Without this time or space, peace will be difficult to achieve. We may see evidence of this in our schedules that allow plenty of time to do but not enough time to just be. Tonight we can start to set aside moments, rearrange schedules, and give ourselves the chance to make our own nest of pleasant thoughts. Tonight I can find pleasure in today and relax. What pleasant thoughts can I use to build my nest? ************************************************** ~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~ Being in trouble Many of us have experienced failure in school, loss of jobs, quarrels with families and friends, and encounters with police and jails. In the beginning it is hard to realize that trouble is not simply a part of our personality. We may feel jinxed. But through the program we realize that we don’t have to live that way. We don’t have to feel jinxed. We can finally see what “peace of mind” means. Am I leaving my troubles behind me? Higher Power, help me to realize all the choices I now have in my life. I will enhance my peace of mind today by God help me to stay clean and sober today! ************************************************** ~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~ It's a day like any other. ~ JAMES SCHUYLER ~ Newcomer Over these last several months, I've done a number of things sober for the first time since I can remember. I’ve survived my first New Year's Eve, family reunion, birthday, and Fourth of July without acting out my addiction. I love having gotten through these days, but it wasn't easy. I'm not sure I can say I celebrated, or that I'm looking forward to next year. Sponsor Holidays may pose a challenge to those of us in early recovery. They may raise questions about our relationships with loved ones, put us in close proximity to people who are acting out our addictions, and confront us with memories of our own past behavior. We still need to avoid people, places, and things that might lead us back to addiction: we can make decisions about where we want to be and with whom, based on our own most pressing needs in recovery. We can volunteer to help others: sending holiday dinners in a homeless shelter, speaking at a correctional facility, or leading a meeting are some techniques for strengthening our own recovery and cultivating gratitude. As holidays in recovery return, they'll be opportunities for us to notice and appreciate how far we've come. I avoid dramatic highs and lows as I celebrate another day in recovery. ************************************************** ~ THE EYE OPENER ~ If we think—truly think—our lives will become manageable, and if we thank God who made this thinking possible for us, then our lives are almost sure to remain manageable. We alcoholics can contain our entire philosophy in these two words—THINK and THANK. Think before you take that first drink, then thank your God that you didn't. ************************************************** ~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~ 1) ANGER: Any No Good Energy Rising 2) Soak up AA the way you used to soak up alcohol. 3) Day By Day. ************************************************** ~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~ What I Ought to Know Grant me, O Lord, to know what I ought to know, to love what I ought to love, to praise what pleases You most, to value what is important in Your eyes. Do not allow me to judge others according to the sight of my eyes only, or to pass judgment according to gossip, but to know what is true and spiritual, and above all to always pray for what is good according to Your will. ************************************************* ~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~ ACCEPT NO SECOND-BESTS In the depths of his being man always feels intuitively that there is a way out of his difficulties if only he can find it. The infant, as yet uncontaminated by the defeatism of his elders, simply refuses to tolerate inharmony on any terms, and therefore he demonstrates over it. When he is hungry he tells the world while many a sophisticated adult goes without. Does he find a pin sticking in some part of his anatomy? Not for him a sigh of resignation to the supposed "will of God" or a whine about never having any luck, or a sigh that what cannot be cured must be endured. His instincts tell him that life and harmony are inseparable. Refuse to tolerate anything less than harmony. You can have a happy and joyous life. But to do so you must seize the rudder of your own destiny and steer boldly for the port that you intend to make. What are you doing about your future? For not the hearers of the law are just before God, but the doers of the law shall be justified (Romans 2:13). ************************************************** ~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~ A Few More Phone Calls Everything he wanted to do was impossible. Everything he did had never been done before. ~ Said about Muppets creator Jim Henson ~ In the film For Love or Money, Michael J. Fox plays a conniving hotel concierge who wheels and deals to get his guests whatever they want. When he calls one of his sources to obtain some hard-to-get sports tickets, his contact tells him, "They are impossible to get." "Nothing is impossible," Fox comes back, "'Impossible' just takes a few more phone calls." If you're persistent enough, you can accomplish anything you choose. One morning I showed up at the airport at 8:00 A.M. to catch a 9 o'clock plane. When I handed the agent my frequent flyer award coupons to purchase the ticket, I was stunned to hear her tell me, "I'm sorry, sir, today is a blackout day for frequent flyer awards." Well, that wouldn't quite do. I walked across the lobby to a telephone and called the airline reservation office. "No can do," I was told. I called again. "Not today." I called again. "Sorry, I can't help you." I kept calling until finally I got an agent who told me, "I'll get you onto that flight." I knew that if I just kept asking, eventually someone would say yes. My intention to get on the flight was stronger than the airline's intention for me not to be on it. Soon after 9 o'clock, I sat back and enjoyed the view from the sky. Every great invention or world transformation was once considered impossible. "Impossible" is a momentary and illusory belief in limitation. Expand your vision to see the big picture, and you will live in an infinite universe. Help me to remember Your ability to manifest my good. I say yes to love and welcome Your answer of yes to me. All of God’s power lives within me. I am unlimited. |
August 26
Step by Step " ...(M)y life has had a purpose, not in great things accomplished but in daily living. Courage to face each day has replaced the fears and uncertainties of earlier years. Acceptance of things as they are has replaced the old impatient chomping at the bit to conquer the world. I have stopped tilting at windmills, and instead have tried to accomplish little daily tasks, unimportant in themselves, but tasks that are an integral part of living fully." - Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, "Alcoholics Anonymous Number Three," Ch 10 ("He Sold Himself Short"), p 295. Today, may I not be self-critical or deflated if something I hope to achieve isn't realized because, if I have worked toward it without drinking, I have achieved one of those "little daily tasks" that might be "unimportant in themselves" but "are an integral part of living fully." If I have gone through the last 24 Hours without drinking, that in itself is an accomplishment of gratitude and inspiration for the next 24 Hours. And if doing today without drinking seems like something not to be fully appreciated, a comparison to what I DIDN'T accomplish on a day of drinking should provide a measure of the magnitude of not drinking today. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M. ************************************************** ~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~ TODAY IS THE NOW I've shut the door on yesterday And thrown the key away. Tomorrow holds no fears for me Since I have found today. ~ Vivian Y. Laramore ~ Living in the now is one of the most important ways of finding lasting recovery. One of the favorite slogans to be followed is “One Day at a Time." We willingly accept the fact that yesterday is gone forever and tomorrow is only an expectation. When we have finished with yesterday and have no fear of tomorrow we can be assured that we can truly be content with each new today. Living in the now is an acceptance of life's realities. Honesty is the keynote to being happy throughout each day as it comes. Today surely is the "first day of the rest of our lives." It can be, if lived with gratitude, love, and honesty, the best day yet in our newly found today. Today truly can be that wonderful exciting day that on yesterday I eagerly called "tomorrow.” I can greet every today by exclaiming, "This day can be the start of the best years of my life." ************************************************** ~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~ Smooth seas do not make skillful sailors. ~ African proverb ~ Only by meeting many different conditions and being challenged by problems do we develop great skill in dealing with life. We say a man is soft who has always had everything handed to him. We admire a man who has met great challenges and come through them. However, while we are struggling and when the challenges are really on top of us, we may not feel that we are in the midst of some admirable battle. We are more likely to simply feel burdened and stressed, not knowing what the outcome will be. When the sailor is in the midst of the storm, he focuses intently upon what he has to do right now. He learns to read the wind and the waves in these extreme conditions by being there and by learning from others who are more experienced. That is a model for developing our skills on this sea of life. Today I will focus on what I need to do just for today, and I will learn from those who are more experienced than I am. ************************************************** ~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~ Whatever the mind pictures and expects, that it will also build and produce for you! ~ Catherine Ponder ~ Our addiction fed our belief that others were responsible for how we acted. That has made it hard to accept that we are in charge and have been all along. Our personal power is nearly beyond comprehension. The images we carry in our minds become our reality. This program and its principles can guide our thoughts and so give us hope that we can have more positive lives. We can quiet our minds and deliberately decide what to dwell on. We usher in the reality we deserve when we picture joy and loving interactions with people, when we create the positive details we long for in our relationships, our jobs, our personal attitudes. I am in control of how I see and experience my life today. My mind is always at work, but I’m its boss! ************************************************** ~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~ I need, to be gentle with myself As I am seeing my emotional illness and addiction more and more clearly, as I am coming to see just how they have affected my life. Some- times I feel afraid and ashamed and guilty and overwhelmed. Sometimes I don't like the way I am or what I've done. At times like these, it usually helps when I promptly share my struggle with my support person. He reassures me that my feelings are not unusual. Then he reminds me to keep thinking about three things: (a) being gentle with myself as my awareness deepens; (b) respecting myself for the courage and strength I have already shown; and (c) forgiving myself. When I think of his helpful words and his acceptance of me, I can better accept myself and move through this difficult stage. I will write down one positive thing I have done today and then add one reason I like myself. ************************************************* ~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~ God is in the details. ~ Mies Van Der Rohe ~ The Swiss psychoanalyst C. G. Jung had inscribed on his front door, “Whether invoked or not, God will be present.” It may be difficult for us to believe that God is closest to us when we are farthest from God. Do we think God comes to us only through virtue and goodness? Do we continue to view God as judge and stem parent? Loving ourselves and others unconditionally is impossible if we feel we have to prove, and reprove, our worth to our Higher Power. Accepting that God never leaves our side is our security blanket. If God doesn’t keep score, why are we so hard on ourselves? How would we act today if we believed that we were perfectly protected? What difference would our acceptance of God’s ongoing presence and love make in our daily lives? Today let me accept God’s presence and unconditional love in every moment of my life. ************************************************** ~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~ Courage is only an accumulation of small steps. ~ George Konrad ~ In a Sioux Indian story about courage, the Great Creator gathers all living things together and presents them with a challenge. “I gave each of you courage,” the Creator says. “But it is something I want humans to work hard to dis-cover. Where can I hide it?” The eagle spoke. “I am not afraid to soar high into the sky. I will place it among the stars ” But the Creator said, “No. One day humans will fly into the skies and easily find this.” The dolphin said, “I am not afraid to dive deep into the ocean. I will deposit it on the ocean floor.” But the Creator said, “No. One day humans will go far below the surface of the ocean and find it.” Then a tiny gnat spoke up. “I cannot soar into the sky or dive deep into the ocean or dig into the ground. Even so, I have courage. Why not place it inside of humans? Then it will be up to them to discover it themselves.” And so it was. Until you discover your courage, you will not be able to see how high you can soar and all of the things that you can accomplish. I will seek the courage within me and use it to guide me in all that I do. ************************************************** ~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~ The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes but in having new eyes. ~ Marcel Proust ~ How have we felt when we return to our home-towns, childhood homes, old playgrounds, or high schools after years of absence? Suddenly each place isn't as it once seemed because we're looking through the eyes of someone older and changed. Where we once saw our high school through the eyes of students, we now look at it through the eyes of adults—in a much different way. So it is with all areas of our lives: our jobs, homes, families, friends, or partners. Many of these people and places haven't changed for a long time. Yet, we change every day. Instead of seeing our job as the same old job or our home as the same old home, we can start to look at them differently. Tonight we don't need to change things on the outside to feel better on the inside. We can change how we look at things from the inside out. We can start to see who and what are outside of us as if we were looking at them for the first time. Tonight the ho-hums in our lives can turn into ah-has just by changing the way we see them. There may be many things in my life that haven't changed, but I'm not one of them. Tonight I can see them all with new eyes. ************************************************** ~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~ Letting go of fear Some people talk about the Four Horsemen of chemical dependency: Terror, Bewilderment, Frustration, and Despair. The Four Horsemen have a leader, Fear, and there are a thousand forms of fear for the horsemen to command. The way to combat the horsemen and their leader is with abstinence, honesty, and faith (fear cannot exist where there is faith). Am I finding the faith to let go of my fear? Higher Power, help me find the faith I need to let go of fear. Should I feel afraid about anything today, I will pray that God help me to stay clean and sober today! ************************************************** ~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~ In search of my mother's garden l found my own. ~ ALICE WALKER ~ Newcomer I heard someone say that no one is in our lives by mistake. But am I supposed to believe that my boss is the best of all possible bosses? That people who've hurt me somehow did the right thing? Should I avoid people who threaten my recovery or shouldn't I? Sponsor When we say, "No one comes into our lives by mistake," we don't mean that we're at the mercy of whomever we happen to encounter, but rather that every situation involving another human being offers us an opportunity for getting to know ourselves better and for growing spiritually. We can choose our friends and associates. We're not required to like or trust everyone. But as we look at those we spend time with and those we avoid, those we embrace and those we fear, we learn a great deal about who we are. What part of ourselves are we intolerant of when we encounter it in someone else? What part of ourselves are we willing to face and deal with? What part of ourselves are we prepared to love unconditionally? People in our lives can become our teachers, if we let them. Today, I take the opportunity for growth that the presence of someone in my life offers me. ************************************************** ~ THE EYE OPENER ~ With fiery zeal we devote much energy to going through the motions of living AA. We speak on every occasion we are invited, we rush ourselves dizzy carrying the message to all who call on us, but in the process we sometimes neglect the one man we are most interested in—ourselves. Our AA has become muscular. To reach ourselves requires quiet meditation, daily use of prayer and a comprehensive study of the Program and of ourselves. ************************************************** ~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~ Thank You for My Friends I give You thanks, O God, for those who mean so much to me. For those friends in the Program I can go to anytime. For those with whom I can talk and keep nothing back, knowing that they will not laugh at my defects or dreams. For those whose fellowship makes it easier to be good. For those who, by their warning, have held me back from making mistakes I might have made. Above all, I thank You, God, for giving me all of my recovery friends who are bound to me by a common problem; together we find a common solution. ************************************************* ~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~ THE FOUR HORSEMEN Read Revelation 6. The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse give the key to the nature of man as we know him. When you understand these symbols thoroughly you will understand your own makeup, and you will be able to begin the work of getting dominion over yourself and your surroundings. The Bible is not written in the style of a modem book. It has a method of its own of conveying knowledge through picturesque symbols, the reason being that this is the only possible way in which knowledge could be given to people in all ages in different parts of the world and of different degrees of spiritual development. A symbol appeals to any audience, each individual getting just what he is ready for. The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse stand for the four parts or elements of our human nature. There is, first of all, the physical body—the thing that you see when you look into the glass. Then there is your feeling nature or emotions, and although you cannot "see" your feelings, you are tremendously conscious of them. Third, there is your intellect, which contains every bit of knowledge that you possess. Finally, there is your spiritual nature, your real eternal self; the true you, the I AM, the Indwelling Christ. This is your real identity, which is eternal. Almost everyone believes in its existence, but most people are very little conscious of it as an actuality. Ultimately the time will come when the first three will be merged in the fourth, and then we shall all know instead of only believing that the spiritual nature is all. And ye shall seek me, and find me, when ye shall search for me with all your heart (Jeremiah 29:13). ************************************************** ~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~ See Perfection It is done unto You as You believe. ~ Jesus Christ ~ Helen was very nearsighted for many years. The moment she woke up each day, she would reach for her eyeglasses; she would take them off only when she closed her eyes to sleep, and she became very uncomfortable when she was required to be without them for even a short time. Then Helen read a book on metaphysics in which she learned that physical challenges stem from inner decisions we make. Vision, Helen read, is related to our willingness (or resistance) to see what is happening in our life. Helen decided she would test the theory and shift her attitude to see all things as perfect. Whenever she was tempted to see a situation as faulty or victimizing, she reminded herself, ''I see perfection, and l see perfectly.'' Before long, Helen’s vision began to improve, and eventually she threw away her glasses. The vision of perfection manifested in perfect vision. If you wear glasses, a powerful question to ask yourself is, “When I first began to need eyeglasses, what was happening in my life that l did not want to see?” When I ask this in my seminars, I hear some profound answers. Many people began to wear glasses when their parents were getting divorced, or they were feeling abused by family or friends, or they faced a life trauma. I began to wear eyeglasses when I was bullied by several boys in elementary school, and I felt unprotected. Our physical body is always sending us messages about what is happening with our spirit. Just as we shut down on seeing or hearing when we don’t want to see or hear what's happening in our physical world, we can restore our health by making a new decision to see and hear through God's eyes and ears. Your will for me is perfect health and happiness. I accept your gifts and magnify Your love. I see perfection as it is. |
August 27
Step by Step "I will never know all the people I hurt, all the friends I abused, the humiliation of my family, the worry of my business associates or how far-reaching it was. I continue to be surprised by the people I meet who say, 'You haven't had a drink for a long time, have you?' The surprise to me is the fact that I didn't know that they knew my drinking had gotten out of control. That is where we are really fooled. We think we can drink to excess without anyone knowing it. Everyone knows it. The only one we are fooling is ourselves. We rationalize and excuse our conduct beyond all reason." - Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, "They Stopped in Time," Ch 10 ("It Might Have Been Worse"), p 376. Today, may my experience with "hiding" serve as a hint that I'm hiding nothing and fooling no one but myself about my drinking. If I am drinking today, let me give up the illusion that no one is paying attention and turn my energies that I expend on "hiding" to sobering up. And if I am not drinking, let me consider that I may have missed in my Eighth Step people to whom I owe amends because I may not know or remember who I have hurt. To them, my greatest amend may be continued abstinence. Today, if I am hiding, let me see that I am hiding in plain sight and, if I can't remember all the people who are owed amends, let me make them by staying sober. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M. ********** The Eye Opener Everyone agrees that excessive drinking is an evil. The alcoholic is convinced that for him it is a necessary evil. He thinks he would surely die if he didn't drink. We know now that it only appeared necessary while we were doing our thinking with our appetites. No evil is necessary except in the sense that friction is. Without it, we couldn't get traction and without traction we could not move onward and upward. ********** Around the Year with Emmet Fox And I looked, and behold a pale horse: and his name that sat on him was Death, and Hell followed with him (Revelation 6:8). The first horse is the Pale Horse and "pale" stands for the physical body. If you live but for the body, there is nothing but hell awaiting you on this plane or anywhere else. The body is the mot cruel taskmaster of all, when it is allowed to be the ruler. The Pale Horse indicates all other physical addictions too--what the Bible sometimes calls the "world"--money, position, material honors. Whoever lives for worldly pursuits is the rider on the Pale Horse. And there went out another horse that was red" and power was given to him that sat thereon to take peace from the earth (Revelation 6:4). The Red Horse is you r emotional nature, your feelings. It is dangerous to allow your emotions to have control. This does not mean that emotion is a bad thing in itself. Uncontrolled emotion is a bad thing. A strong emotional nature is a splendid endowment if you are the master, but if it is mastering you, you are riding the Red Horse. ...And I beheld, and lo a black horse; and he that sat on him had a pair of balances in his hand (Revelation 6:5). A pair of scales is here a symbol of unbalance. The Black Horse stands for the intellect. Riding the Black Horse is letting your intellect dominate to the exclusion of the emotional, and especially of the spiritual, nature. It is a good thing to have the intellect well trained, but it is a misfortune to let it be the master. Western civilization has been definitely riding the Black Horse since the close of the Middle Ages. Humanity has developed scientific, intellectual knowledge far beyond the point to which it has developed the moral and spiritual understanding of the race. |
August 28
Step by Step "I realize that all I'm guaranteed in life is today. The poorest person has no less and the wealthiest has no more - each of us has but one day. What we do with it is our own business; how we use it is up to us individually." - Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, "They Lost Nearly All," Ch 2 ("Promoted to Chronic"), p 473. Today, fully understand and accept that all I have today is just that - today! Whether I have little to nothing, or all and more than I can use materially, I am no less and no better than anyone because, in the end, all we take with us to our final chapters is ourselves. But, especially in recovery, I cannot foolishly look too far beyond the forest in my goal to achieve a landmark anniversary of sobriety or any other goal; one of the trees in the forest could cold-cock me. Grant me wisdom and prudence to see first what is in front of me instead of beyond and what must be done to get me to the long-term goal. Today, I do with what I have - today. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M. ************************************************** ~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~ THINK, THINK, THINK To know what you know and to know what you don't know is knowing what it's all about. ~ Anonymous ~ When we work our Program, we are reintroduced to a person about whom we knew very little and understood not at all. This person was ourselves. We traced our personal histories back in time and discovered the many ways our addictions were living our lives. They walked for us, talked for us, cried for us, ate for us, made love for us, and, on many occasions, tried to murder us. This power overwhelmed us. It wasn't until we began our recovery that we discovered a way out. We have been given our lives back. We are now in possession of all our senses and skills. However, they have not been used much; they are rusty. We need to practice being ourselves. The slogan "Think, Think, Think" reminds us that what we tell ourselves affects our actions. I must remember to "think, think, think" before I act, react, or pursue my desires. ************************************************** ~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~ The creative process is a process of surrender, not control. ~ Julia Cameron ~ When creative artists describe the experience of creating a painting or writing a novel, they often talk about feeling that they are given inspiration, as if it comes from outside them. They tell us that if they are too willful or too deliberate, they get in the way. When we begin to walk the Twelve Steps, we enter that same kind of process. We are led to surrender—not in defeat, but to let ourselves be cared for. As men we may know little about becoming so vulnerable. Many of us concluded long ago that vulnerability only led to pain and defeat. Perhaps we could let a lover care for us, especially in an erotic or sexual way. But opening ourselves to the care of our group, our sponsor, our Higher Power was outside anything we had ever tried. On this path, our whole life is a creative process. We can’t know exactly where it will take us. That is the adventure—and it is infinitely long. We continue the creative way, daily learning new things and developing new experiences. We are present and open, and we know the feeling of being spiritually awake. Today my life will be a creative adventure. ************************************************** ~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~ Spiritual experience is personal and individual. ~ Veronica Ray ~ We envy people who have had profound spiritual experiences. In comparison, our experiences often look meager. But the tiny awarenesses we have that God has always been present in our lives are as convincing as the most awesome experiences. We simply need to recognize them as evidence. When situations fail to please us or other people seem out of control, we long for our Higher Power to be more present in our lives. But we are slowly coming to understand that everyone else has a Higher Power; when others aren’t living according to our will, perhaps they are living according to their God’s will. When we come to terms with God’s role in our lives, we’ll feel more assurance about our own role and be more aware of the myriad, concrete examples of the spiritual experiences we have had. My experience with God is very much my own. It does not resemble someone else’s experience. God considers my needs unique. ************************************************** ~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~ I feel better today It used to be that each day was just as dull or unhappy as the one before it. I kept doing the same things that kept me down—using street drugs, ignoring my medication, and ignoring the professional help that was offered me. The week I hit bottom, each day was worse than the one before. But now it feels like I'm finally into recovery. I've been drug-free for several weeks and attending my group. Last night I took my meds on time and went to sleep at a reasonable hour. Today I woke up in a good mood, did my daily recovery activities, and then wrote a while in my journal. I even took a risk: I called a family member just to talk. It was good to hear his voice (I think he accepts me more these days). Things are looking up. Today I will give myself a healthful reward for my commitment to recovery. ************************************************* ~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~ Every day is a new day. The past is gone, the future still to come; but today is ours to do with as we will. ~ D. M. Prescott ~ Recovery means we can make choices on a daily basis, choices that will be in our best interest. Now, we can choose to be loving, forgiving, and positive. We can choose the people, places, and things that bring comfort and joy to our lives. Now, we can choose life. In recovery, we have tools to help us make these choices: our Twelve Step program, sober friends, slogans, and literature. We have a new physical and mental stamina to help us make and fulfill healthy decisions. And our spiritual rebirth gives us serenity and peace no matter what problems we may face. We are saying good-bye to our past. We can’t look into the future, and only work on ourselves today. But, truly, “Today is ours to do with as we will.” Today guide my choices, as I lead a sober life, one day at a time. ************************************************** ~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~ You start by saying no to requests. Then if you have to go to yes, okay. But if you start with yes, you can’t go to no. ~ Mildred Perlman ~ There may be times when a friend, family member, co-worker, or others ask for your help, and you say yes when you really do not want to. There are some requests made of you that may add to an already full schedule, deprive you of the time in which you need to do something for yourself, or make you uncomfortable. One of the first words you learn to say in recovery is no. You must say no to your addiction in order to stay on the right path. You must say no to someone who asks you to be a sponsor if you cannot devote the time and attention needed. You must say no to invitations to parties if the presence of alcohol or drugs will put your recovery at risk. outside of the program it may be more difficult to say no. You may feel guilty if you do. But your recovery must come first. This does not mean you must be selfish or say no to everyone. It simply means you need to make sure your needs are met first. I will not say yes unless it is right for me to do so. ************************************************** ~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~ It takes more than a soft pillow to insure sound sleep. ~ Anonymous ~ Our minds may be the most difficult part of our bodies to relax. From our toes to our fingertips, we may find we can easily make the limb and torso muscles grow heavy with relaxation. But when it comes to the muscle that exists above our necks, we may find our heads so loaded with facts and feelings that signals to relax get blocked. If we were to open the top of our heads and see the crammed things as slips of paper, what would we find? On one slip of paper we might see the word guilt. On another, shame. Others might read anger, stress, jealousy, pressure, fear, or distrust. All these papers do is clog the channels of creativity, fun, and relaxation. When these channels are clogged, even the most comfortable bed and the softest pillow won’t help us have a peaceful sleep. To make the most of our relaxation time tonight, we need to place those papers where they belong in the trash. Tonight I can do a little "head cleaning" before I go to sleep. Help me remove all the unwanted messages and let the peaceful channels flow free. ************************************************** ~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~ Maintaining conscious contact At meetings, it’s fairly easy to be in touch with our Higher Power, but it’s the rest of the time that’s most important, time when we face our problems on our own. It helps if we can work the program throughout the day, to keep in conscious contact with our Higher Power. Many of us use the Serenity Prayer. Others use personal prayers, meditate, or set aside quiet moments during the day. Do I have a way to hook up with my Higher Power? Higher Power, help me to make the time to maintain conscious contact with you. Today I will improve my conscious contact with God by God help me to stay clean and sober today! ************************************************** ~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~ It is not the weak but the strong who practice tolerance, and the strong do not weaken their position showing tolerance. ~ DAG HAMMARSKJOLD ~ Newcomer What if I can't forgive myself? Sponsor Many of us in recovery are harder on ourselves than we'd be on anyone else. The spiritual awakening that occurs through the process of taking the Twelve Steps can help us to let go of the habits of self-blame and self-punishment. Entering recovery was an action that took faith and courage; for most of us, it was the most difficult thing we'd done in our lives. Now that we've taken that step, can we genuinely believe that growth and change are over and that happiness and freedom are for others, but not for us? In time, with the help of our Higher Power, our capacity for forgiveness will grow to include ourselves. If we think that we can't forgive ourselves, we can pray to become willing to forgive ourselves. If we think that we can't pray to become willing, we can simply say the words, "For today, I'm not yet willing to forgive myself." Putting it this way leaves the door open. We haven't ruled out future change. We've left room for the possibility that there will come a day when we will have the willingness. In time, more will be revealed. Today, I trust that my Higher Power hasn't brought me this far only to abandon me. ************************************************** ~ THE EYE OPENER ~ The subconscious aim of practically all men is to get the most and the best out of every day of their lives. It is a simple creed and if honestly followed, day by day, act by act, it cannot help but lead to greater heights. Like AA, it is so simple it is incredible. Why not try it? It's what you honestly want anyway. ************************************************** ~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~ 1) Don't "have" a nice day, MAKE a nice day. 2) God's will: You can't do His will, your way. 3) When your head begins to swell your mind stops growing. ************************************************** ~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~ Easy Does It Dear God, help me remember to take things slowly, for spiritual progress requires time for growth. Maturity is not an overnight miracle. Help me to be productive and keep me from procrastinating or being impatient and rushing ahead too quickly. I will remind myself today not to push myself faster than I need to go. I won't push the river; I'll let it flow. ************************************************* ~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~ THE CONQUERING HORSE And I saw, and behold a white horse : and he that sat on him had a bow; and a crown was given unto him: and he went forth conquering, and to conquer (Revelation 6:2). The White Horse is the spiritual nature, and the man or woman who rides the White Horse achieves freedom, and joy, and ultimate happiness and harmony. We are told two very interesting things about the Horseman on the White Horse: the Bible says that he that sat on him had a bow. The bow and arrow is an ancient symbol of the spoken Word. When you speak the Word you shoot an arrow. It goes where you aim it. The Horseman on the White Horse speaks the Word. The rider on the White Horse also wears a crown, and the crown is a symbol of victory. The rider on the White Horse is always the victor. This, then, is the story of the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse. If you want peace, an understanding of God, there is only one way—you must ride the White Horse. ************************************************** ~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~ A Little Bit of Heaven In the middle of every difficulty lies an opportunity. ~ Albert Einstein ~ In a documentary about the 1969 Woodstock Music Festival, a woman who had been there told how participants had to pull together to help each other in the midst of a city of 500,000 people that had formed overnight. People pushed each other’s cars out of the mud, shared food, ministered to hippies on bad drug trips, and delivered a baby. “I guess there’s a little bit of heaven in every disaster area,” she noted. Sometimes disasters set the stage for blessings that would otherwise go unnoticed or unappreciated. When Hurricane Iniki destroyed or damaged most of the dwellings on the Island of Kauai, residents had to pull together to take care of each other after the storm. One fellow told me, “It was the first time in many years that the aloha spirit returned to the island." After the 1989 San Francisco earthquake, teams of massage therapists volunteered to treat firefighters who had worked nearly to exhaustion. Businessmen ate lunch next to homeless people in outdoor cafes while the damage was being repaired. Many heroes who would otherwise have remained anonymous came to the fore. No event is entirely negative. Sometimes a hell can set a stage for an unexpected heaven. Show me how to find the light in the darkness. Help me be a light to others. I have the power to create heaven wherever I am. |
August 29
Step by Step Today, understand that serenity comes from within and not from people and things on the outside. I wasted too much time, emotion and energy in my drinking days searching and even clinging to outside things and people in whom I vested my sobriety. But now I must accept that my sobriety comes from within. I no longer can demand or hope that the world and other people can change to accommodate my recovery but that I must change to fit into them. AA gives me the road map to arrive at such a lofty destination, in Step Four: "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves." Steps Five, Six and Seven, then, guide us through the admission to God, to ourselves and another human being the "exact nature" of the wrongs we find in Step Four. The steps are dependent on action by me, not someone or something else. Today, I assume responsibility for both my addiction and recovery. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M. ************************************************** ~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~ TEACHERS To teach is to learn twice over. ~ Joseph Joubert ~ At every meeting, there is an abundance of teachers, ready, willing, and able to pass on to others the results of lessons they have experienced through constant openminded attendance at meetings. New arrivals to a Group frequently hear, "Find a teacher and you will find a new friend." This truism is soon apparent to any who choose to listen to teachers. The passing on to others of the useful lessons learned in recovery comes from those members who have savored recovery for lengths of time ranging from a few months to several decades. Beginners readily accept the advice they receive because one of the first realization's a newcomer enjoys is that they are hearing honesty. He or she knows they can believe what they hear and will never have to take the painful steps of learning facts from personal experience. I have met many teachers in my recovery. They hold the torches that light the way for me to learn. I will continue to follow the light. ************************************************** ~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~ God provides minimum protection, maximum support. ~ William Sloane Coffin ~ People often ask how a just God could allow innocent children to starve to death, or how an all-powerful God could send devastating storms that cause pain and destruction across the land. Great theologians tell us that we cannot hold God responsible for the evil and pain in the world. Bad things happen, and they aren’t the work of God. In a random universe, God’s design is to be present with us and support us through the troubles we face. When we turn our life and will over to the care of God, we can’t expect God to bring us special magical favors. Instead we turn over our willfulness and childish demanding nature to God who helps us be strong, maintain our spirit, and continue on our path. Then God never leaves us alone, even when we defy God, even when we make bad choices. God is there loving us, even when we feel worthless. Today I will open myself to the support of my Higher Power. ************************************************** ~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~ Willing to be oneself is not always easy, especially when ... we are not at all sure who we are. ~ Mary McDermott Shideler ~ It’s normal to mimic the expressions and the opinions of the people we admire. We did it as girls. We continue to do it. Fortunately, our taste In friends and models has improved. We have now surrounded ourselves with women who are abstinent from mood-altering chemicals and who have chosen honest, spiritually focused lives. A goal of our recovery is to discover and celebrate who we really are. It’s time to focus on what we actually think, what we really feel, who we prefer being. This self-discovery is empowering, yet arduous and humbling. Because we are human and not perfect, we come face-to-face with traits that signal our need for growth. This journey into self- discovery changes us forever. We can never so easily mimic others again. I can be the person I want to be today. I now have the courage to choose my actions rather than imitate someone else’s. ************************************************** ~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~ I know what to do if I have a setback Recently I had a slip with my addiction. My sponsor quickly helped me get back on track. Then I asked myself, What would happen if I had a setback with my psychiatric illness? Would that be a different matter to deal with? Even though I'm stable on medication, I understand that it could still happen. So I wound up asking a friend from my support group if he would be willing to watch out for me, just as my sponsor does. He said yes. Then we agreed on what steps should be taken if I had a setback and couldn't take care of myself. Even though I don't expect a problem, I feel better now that I have a good plan in place. I will write down my important setback/relapse plans—just in case. ************************************************* ~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~ Adopt the pace of nature, her secret is patience. ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson ~ One of the mixed blessings of early recovery from chemical addiction is the remarkable healing power of the human body. Except for those in the late stages of addiction, most of us begin to feel better fairly quickly, often within a few days. But complete physical recovery from alcohol or drug abuse takes a long time. Likewise emotional and spiritual recovery, which usually take longer. We can easily get discouraged when our emotional and spiritual recovery lags so far behind the physical. Most crucial to our recovery, especially early recovery, is patience. We need to have patience with family and friends who may not understand that we have an illness called addiction. We need patience with Twelve Step group members who may sometimes move too fast or seem not to understand us. Above all, we need patience with ourselves. Our Higher Power can help us learn to love ourselves, even when we seem to be moving slowly. Recovery takes time. We do what we can, and let our Higher Power and time do their share of the healing. Today let me be patient. Help me know that, like a growing plant, patience will grow within me if I nurture it. ************************************************** ~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~ God gives every bird his worm, but He does not throw it into the nest. ~ P.D. James ~ A young girl loved to ice skate at every opportunity. In the winter she would find a frozen pond; in the summer she used indoor rinks. As she grew older, she won several competitions. Some of the best coaches in the world noticed her and vied to lead her to Olympic glory. She selected a coach who had trained gold-medal Olympians and began working with him. For the first few weeks, the coach had her focus on the basics of jumps. She begged him to let her practice ice dancing, but he refused. Finally she fired him and hired mother, who led her to the Olympics. During the competition, she was locked in a fierce battle with another skater. Their numerical scores were so close that one tiny mistake could spell the difference between a gold or silver medal. On the final day of competition, she thought back to her first coach, who had made her practice her jumps. She realized that he had provided her with a very valuable lesson. Perfecting even the simplest components of her routine could lead her to victory. I devote focus to all that I do to be the best I can. ************************************************** ~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~ The awareness of the ambiguity of one's highest achievements (as well as one's deepest failures) is a definite symptom of maturity. ~ Paul Tillich ~ While we were still living with the effects of the disease, we may have ridden the roller coaster of highs and lows. But once we got off that crazy ride, we learned life isn’t so dramatic. Life has its wonderful moments and is not-so-wonderful ones, but on the whole it takes us on a steady ride. Once we begin to mature in the program, we learn how to become a passenger of life without gripping the rails and strapping ourselves in. Now we can open our eyes for the whole ride, look around us with wonder and appreciation, and feel less breathless about the movement of it all. Life without the highs and lows is a wonderful trip. Tonight I can feel the quiet pace of my life and not question whether it is normal. I can relax and trust this quiet pace as a sign of my maturity. ************************************************** ~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~ Working the Twelve Steps There is a good reason why the Twelve Steps are numbered one to twelve: They are meant to be taken in order. For instance, we must admit we are powerless over our addiction (Step One) before the other steps can help us. Likewise, Step Four would be too painful if we had not turned our wills and our lives over to the care of God in Step Three. And how can we make amends in Steps Eight and Nine unless we realize whom we have hurt in Steps Four and Five? Of course, we can do Step Twelve only after doing all the other Steps. The hop-skip-jump method of working the Steps is not reliable and might hop- skip-jump us right back into our addiction. Do I work all Twelve Steps of the program in the best order? Higher Power, give me the strength to take each Step—as hard as it may be- in the most helpful order. Today I will review my progress on each of the Steps and re-enter the order with God help me to stay clean and sober today! ************************************************** ~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~ Don't be humble: you're not that great. ~ GOLDA MEIR ~ Newcomer I'm still confused about the issue of forgiveness. What if someone takes advantage of me, harms me, or cheats me? Do I just do nothing? Sponsor We're not required to be doormats. Self-esteem requires us to speak our truth, when doing so isn't harmful to ourselves and doesn't harm others. We're not really doing people or institutions any favors by not acknowledging problems. Not long ago, I bought a piece of equipment for my home office that turned out to be defective. In my days of active addiction, I'd have yelled at the salesman, threatened to sue the company, created a huge drama and a lot of ill will. Or I might have done nothing at all—simply swallowed my anger and taken a loss, or had the equipment repaired at my own expense. Both of these paths are those of a person with low self-esteem. In recovery I could be clear, firm, and persistent about my expectation of having the defective equipment picked up and replaced. Today, I expect myself and others to keep promises. Asking a manufacturer to stand behind a product is a way to express my respect for truth. Had my efforts failed to get results, I'd still have felt successful: simply by speaking honestly, I'd have achieved something important. Today, I acknowledge my needs firmly and clearly, to myself and to others. ************************************************** ~ THE EYE OPENER ~ The relationship of hours to a lifetime is comparable to the relationship of bricks to a house. Every brick that is laid must be a separate and distinct operation, yet so tied to the preceding and the following brick that their positions are level and plumb. Each one is an entirety in itself but all the bricks are either supporting or are supported by each other. Our hours, lived one by one, are in no sense different. The beauty, strength and durability of our lives will be determined by the individual hours viewed collectively. ************************************************** ~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~ Shinto Blessing I humbly speak in the presence of the Great Parent God, I pray that this day, the whole day, as a child of God, I may not be taken hold of by my own desire, but demonstrate the Divine Glory by living a life of creativeness, which shows forth the true individual. ************************************************* ~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~ THE BOOK OF GENESIS Genesis means origin or beginning, and this, the first book of the Bible, explains how things and conditions come into existence. Genesis deals with this creative power of thought. The first section deals with generic thought. The second, the story of Adam and Eve, deals with specific thought, or how a given person builds every condition that exists in his life. The sections concerning Cain and Abel, the tower of Babel, the flood, the story of Abraham and his family, the story of Joseph and his brethren, all deal in different ways with the creative power of thought, showing how it is the genesis of all things that exist. The book of Genesis is partly allegorical and partly historical. Unless you have the spiritual meaning behind the story you do not possess the Bible at all. The covenant of Sinai, necessary and good in its place, signifies the attempt to order things from the outside and is, of course, much better than anarchy; but he who is on the spiritual path must pass beyond this to the spiritual Jerusalem, which is the ordering of things from the inside by the Practice of the Presence of God. This is the new Jerusalem that cometh straight down from God out of heaven. And I John saw the holy city, new Jerusalem, coming down from God out of heaven . . . (Revelation21:2). The book of Genesis having explained the creative power of thought, the other books of the Bible then proceed to illustrate the way in which the laws of thought work in different circumstances, but Genesis is the foundation of it all. ************************************************** ~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~ Where to Start Can the world be saved if you are not ~ A Course in Miracles ~ “Daddy, will you play with me?" was the last thing Bill wanted to from his five-year-old son. He had just come home from work tired, and all he wanted to do was relax and read the evening paper. Suddenly, a scheme dawned on him. He took a picture of the earth out of the newspaper, tore it up into a hundred little pieces, and gave them to his son. "Here is a jigsaw puzzle, Scottie," Dad explained. "Take it to your room and put it together. When you're done, Daddy will play with you." Scott enthusiastically ran off with the game, and Bill sat smug and proud that he had bought himself some time. To Bill's surprise, Scottie returned in just a short time with the entire page intact. "How did you do that?" asked Bill incredulously. "I couldn't have done that puzzle in three times the time you took." "Well," answered Scottie innocently, "the picture of the earth you gave me was too complicated; there were so many pieces, and they were all the same. So I turned over one of the pieces and on it was the picture of a man's hand. I turned over another piece, and there was the picture of a foot. It was easier to put one man together than the whole earth. Then I discovered that when the man came together, so did the earth!" Often, our need to save the world is a distraction from the real work of saving ourselves. In many cases, a crusade against world pollution conveniently shifts our attention from the psychic pollution of our own fears and upsets. Of course, world peace and environmental healing are extremely important, but it's even more crucial that we come to terms with the issues that undermine our own inner peace. It's hypocritical to try to end international war if you're ravaged by internal conflict. Personal integrity is the foundation of world transformation. Fill your spirit, and your service will be infinitely more effective. Help me remember that my primary responsibility is the healing of my own mind and heart. My own peace is my first contribution to world peace. |
August 30
Step by Step Today, Step 10 because it is one of the most integral maintenance steps: "Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it." The 10th is the extension of the Fourth in which we "Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves." We cannot and should not believe that our personal inventory and admission of our wrongs is a one-time exercise. Not only can those wrongs be resurrected in recovery and even after we've asked our higher power to remove them, but "new" defects can and do evolve in recovery. But why should we look in the mirror long after our last drink or use? Failing to do so risks old character defects to rise again, possibly undetected, and a fearless honesty will likely tell us that our active addiction was fueled by those defects. And a relapse, even a so-called "slip," is too high a price to pay for neglecting our maintenance of the progress we seek. Today, I have to muster the honesty required of a continued personal inventory - my recovery is too precious a gift to risk. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M. ************************************************** ~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~ WINNERS Stick with the winners. ~ Anonymous ~ We came to the Program with different opinions about who were the winners. Some of us thought a fat bank account meant winning. Others looked to how little one had lost before coming into the program as criteria for winning. There are those that are smart, some pretty, eithers with good jobs, We discover rather quickly that winning has nothing to do with how one appears to be or what one has. Winning is about how one lives. Therefore, we want to watch the men and women who have had time in the Program. We don't look for just birthday numbers. We watch how the Steps have been and are being worked. We look for the men and women who exhibit humility, gratitude, and spirituality. The winners are usually the ones involved in service. They understand that to keep what they have, they must give it away. The winners freely share their experience, strength, and hope with all of us. I want to stick with the winners. If I do, the winners will stick with me. ************************************************** ~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~ It’s just human. We all have the jungle inside us. We all have wants and needs and desires, strange as they may seem. ~ Diane Frovlov and Andrew Schneider, Northern Exposure ~ Sex is a driving force in our lives. Many of us in recovery find that our sexuality is another part of our fives that is changing. Some of us suddenly find we can’t perform in sobriety as we did while we were using. Others of us are recovering from addiction to sexual behaviors. When we are facing difficulty with our sexuality, it is sometimes hard to think of it as a source of pleasure and reward. In fact our sexuality can recover and heal, just as any other aspect of our personality can recover. Grown-up, adult sex is more comfortable, more sensuous, and more fulfilling than adolescent sex. That is only possible when we are sober and awake to our fives. Many of us need to start by tuning in to our bodies and the sensations we experience now in our sobriety. Along with that, we may need to embrace the fact that we deserve to have sexual pleasure, not as something we are owed, but as something we can seek and indulge in. These changes happen gradually over time as recovery progresses. Today I am grateful for the energizing force of sex and passion in my life. ************************************************** ~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~ I cannot have what I want if I do not wish it for others. ~ Betty MacDonald ~ Envy is familiar to many of us. We may spend far too much time comparing ourselves with others and grading ourselves as inadequate. Focusing on what others have never allows us to feel grateful for our blessings or generous in spirit. Paradoxically, what we want for others comes back to us. This is a simple principle, but like other new ideas, we have to “wear it” for a while to get its meaning; we have to practice it faithfully to get its effect. Perhaps initially we can better see its reverse. Let’s recall a few times when we have harbored mean thoughts toward another or wished ill will on an acquaintance. Our own spirit felt the repercussions. Maybe bad luck didn’t overtly trip us, but we never feel good for long when we cultivate a mean-spirited attitude. Everyone is served by our good wishes. Let’s work on that today. If I catch myself feeling jealous or mean, I’ll take charge of my thoughts. Only I can turn them around. ************************************************** ~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~ I need to keep talking I feel sad, sometimes even helpless these days. Sometimes I end up crying at work and then I feel worse—fragile, out of control. Even if I tried to talk about my fears and feelings, I don't think anyone would understand. Or would they? Am I just feeling sorry for myself? When I start feeling this bad, it's tough for me to get past my shame and fear of rejection. But if I don't try I start to isolate myself and that only makes matters worse. Perhaps I really do need to talk. I need to keep moving through the pain. I will call a caring friend to listen to me. If need be, I can begin the conversation by stating the truth: it’s hard for me to be open with my feelings. ************************************************* ~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~ I can hear music- sweet, sweet music. ~ Brian Wilson ~ We often find it helpful to think about the role music has played in our lives. Sometimes, it has been a problem for us: time spent listening to loud, blaring music was a time of physical and emotional isolation, usually under the influence of drugs. In recovery we may find ourselves drawn to a different kind of music, that speaks to our changing way of life. Perhaps it is more soothing or relaxing. Perhaps it is a new artist. Whatever type of music we choose, we find it is much more than a pastime for us. It is an appreciation. Our favorite artists, our favorite songs: some never change, some do. Our relationship with music is growing and changing. In recovery we find music engages our minds and relaxes our bodies in a new way. Music lifts our spirits, too. We are grateful that music is part of our life and that we now have a chance to think about it and perhaps even develop some new interests. Music is an excellent way to get to know other people, helps us unwind after a hard day, and adds a new dimension to our enjoyment of life. Today I thank You for music. Help me to love and appreciate it even more now that I am sober. ************************************************** ~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~ Ritual will always mean throwing away something.... ~ G.K. Chesterton ~ A young student of Zen came upon a chapter in his reading that talked about how a cat must be tied up before the meditation ritual could begin. Confused, he sought an explanation. Long ago, the Zen master told him, a spiritual teacher was about to begin his evening meditation with his pupils when a cat who lived in the monastery started to howl outside the door. Its howling was so distracting that the teacher ordered the cat to be tied up. After the teacher died, the cat continued to be tied up during a meditation session. Then, after the cat died, another cat was obtained so that it, too, could be tied up during meditation. Tying up a cat, the Zen master explained, had simply become part of the ritual. “But it serves no purpose,” the young student pointed out. “You are right,” said the Zen master and immediately tore the chapter out of the meditation book. If a routine or habitual way of doing something in your life is no longer helping you, it may be time to get rid of it. You can replace it with a beneficial habit, or simply let it go. I will hold on to those routines and habits that help me. ************************************************** ~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~ A bit of fragrance always clings to the hand that gives you roses. ~ Chinese proverb ~ Remember reading fairy tales where elves would come in the middle of the night to build toys or repair broken dreams or help another have more free time? They would work furiously, yet happily, knowing they were doing something that person really needed or wanted. They asked for no reward; in fact, they didn’t even stay long enough to see the surprised, smiling faces. They knew without seeing the results that they were creating happiness and gratefulness in another. We can do the same thing for others. We can decide to be more caring, to watch for opportunities to reach out to others. We can bring some flowers to a friend. We can remember someone's special treat. We can write a letter or send a card or make a long-distance phone call. I will brighten the life of another tomorrow, by doing something special and unexpected. I will feel the joy of giving and brighten my day, too! ************************************************** ~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~ Accepting others (and ourselves) We must guard against judging other people: As we judge, so are we judged. In other words, if we keep thinking that others will slip, we are more likely to slip ourselves. It seems that unconsciously we try to feel better about our own character defects by projecting them onto others. If we practice accepting ourselves, however, we will be better able to accept others. To help this practice, we must realize that our defects will be removed by our Higher Power in time, as long as we desire and pray that they be removed. We must also realize that we are not perfect and that we need and deserve love. Can I fully accept myself and others? Higher Power, help me to accept others by working on self-acceptance. I will work on what I find difficult to accept in myself today by God help me to stay clean and sober today! ************************************************** ~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~ If you don't remember history accurately, how can you learn? ~ MAYA LIN ~ Newcomer Someone from my past called yesterday. He left the message that he'd be speaking with me soon. I haven't seen this person since I started recovery. I know he can't take my recovery away from me, but I feel threatened. All I can think of, when I imagine seeing him again, is how the two of us used to act out together. Sponsor People, places, and things from our past continue to be an issue even after the first few months of recovery. It takes time to accumulate enough sober experience for the habit of recovery to feel stronger than the habit of acting out our addictions. Even now that saying no and asking for help have begun to seem like second nature to us, we're not invulnerable. People with long-term recovery have been known to have relapses. You're right: another person can't take recovery away from us. But why subject ourselves to stresses that endanger our serenity and our sense of connection to people in the program? Sentimental feelings about the past and hopes of leading others to recovery are better put on the shelf, Relationships based on mutual enabling and acting out have no place in our recovery. Today, I have a healthy respect for my disease. I keep my serenity by avoiding people, places, and things related to my addiction and by staying close to the fellowship. ************************************************** ~ THE EYE OPENER ~ You can't swim like a fish, run like a deer, fight like a tiger, or fly like a bird. Every one of your five senses is excelled by some member of the animal kingdom. Man, physically, has many superiors and would long since have been extinct but for the fact that he alone possesses reasoning power. With this advantage he can build ships to outswim the fish, motor cars to outrun the deer, perfect weapons to out fight the tiger, and airplanes to outstrip the fastest of birds. With this reason he can visualize the reason behind all Nature and thus avail himself of a Power greater than himself and all the forces with which he has to contend. ************************************************** ~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~ Healthy Pride O Lord, deliver me from false pride. Before recovery, my false pride led to grandiosity, arrogance, egotism, self-pity, misunderstanding, and fear. My misguided pride was out of control, and I thought I knew everything. In recovery, I have learned my accomplishments are not mine alone. I rely on the guidance of others and faith in my Higher Power. When I indulge in false pride, I close my mind, which desperately needs to be open. Healthy pride in my progress, if coupled with gratitude and humility, will not cause harm. Help me, Lord, remove the intellectual false pride that blocks me from others and the principles of our Program. ************************************************* ~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~ THE TOWER OF BABEL And the whole earth was of one language, and of one speech (Genesis 11:1). Read Genesis 11:1-9. The story of the tower of Babel is so simple, so concrete, and so clear, that if you only heard it once when you were a child you could never forget it. It is, of course, a parable. The word Babel means confusion and this parable teaches that when you deny the omnipotence of God, and you do this whenever you give power to anything else, only confusion can follow. To be guilty of that sin is really to have many gods, and that was the characteristic fault of the heathen. Those who knew the truth about God worshiped Him and Him alone, and they received the protection and the inspiration that only the Truth can give. At times, however, many of those who had known the Truth, forgot it for a season, and inevitably things began to go wrong. If you should be in difficulties of any kind, it is certain that you have been committing the sin of the heathen in some way; it may be that at some point you have seen the higher and deliberately chosen the lower. Now, if you will tum back to God once more, and reaffirm your faith in Him, all will be well again. ************************************************** ~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~ The Choice for Divinity The spirit is smothered as it were, by ignorance, but so soon as it is destroyed, light shines forth like the sun when released from clouds. ~ Shankara ~ I knew a man named Jessie who was an idiot savant, the technical name for someone who is partially mentally handicapped and partially a genius (like the character played by Dustin Hoffman in Rainman). One day while I was sitting with Jessie, he casually asked me, "What day were you born?" When I told him the date and year, he blurted out, “That was a Tuesday.” Astonished, l threw some more dates at him, and with equal swiftness, he rattled off the precise days of the week on which the events occurred. A few minutes later, Jessie was led on to a little yellow school bus because he was unable to find his own way home. He could not dress himself, drive a car, or handle money—but he could calculate long-gone dates as rapidly as a computer. In a way, each of us embodies the characteristics of an idiot savant. We are sometimes inept at making common sense decisions, yet moments later the wisdom of the ages shines within us, bubbling forth when we need it. There was a time when I developed a huge physical desire for a certain woman. Every time I saw her, I was amazed by how quickly my mind and values would go to jelly. Then she asked me for a counseling session, and the most wonderful miracle happened. The moment she began to speak, I felt a sense of clarity and truth roll through me, and I was able to move beyond my primal attraction and be very helpful to her. My bodily desire gave way to a sense of service, which opened up an important channel to assist her. She walked away with a gift, and I walked away amazed. At any moment, we can play the fool or the genius lf we happen to revert to madness for a moment, let us have compassion for our humanity; we are bound to make mistakes. At any moment, we can claim our spiritual power and bring the highest light and service to any task at hand; our results will proceed naturally from our intentions. Let me be all I can be; I allow You to live through all of me. I am a spiritual being going through a human experience. |
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