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Daily Recovery Readings - April
April 1
Daily Reflections LOOKING WITHIN Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 42 Step Four is the vigorous and painstaking effort to discover what the liabilities in each of us have been, and are. I want to find exactly how, when, and where my natural desires have warped me. I wish to look squarely at the unhappiness this has caused others and myself. By discovering what my emotional deformities are, I can move toward their correction. Without a willing and persistent effort to do this, there can be little sobriety or contentment for me. To resolve ambivalent feelings, I need to feel a strong and helpful sense of myself. Such an awareness doesn't happen overnight, and no one's self-awareness is permanent. Everyone has the capacity for growth, and for self-awareness, through an honest encounter with reality. When I don't avoid issues but meet them directly, always trying to resolve them, they become fewer and fewer. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day Since I've been in A.A., have I made a start toward becoming more honest? Do I no longer have to lie to my loved ones? Do I try to have meals on time, and do I try to earn what I make at work? Am I trying to be honest? Have I faced myself as I really am and have I admitted to myself that I'm no good by myself, but have to rely on God to help me do the right thing? Am I beginning to find out what it means to be alive and to face the world honestly and without fear? Meditation For The Day God is all around us. His spirit pervades the universe. And yet we often do not let His spirit in. We try to get along without His help and we make a mess of our lives. We can do nothing of any value without God's help. All our human relationships depend on this. When we let God's spirit rule our lives, we learn how to get along with others and how to help them. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may let God run my life. I pray that I will never again make a mess of my life through trying to run it myself. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Courage and Prudence, p. 91 When fear persisted, we knew it for what it was, and we became able to handle it. We began to see each adversity as a God-given opportunity to develop the kind of courage which is born of humility, rather than of bravado. << << << >> >> >> Prudence is a workable middle ground, a channel of clear sailing between the obstacles of fear on the one side and of recklessness on the other. Prudence in practice creates a definite climate, the only climate in which harmony, effectiveness, and consistent spiritual progress can be achieved. << << << >> >> >> "Prudence is rational concern without worry." 1. Grapevine, January 1962 2. Twelve Concepts, p. 62 3. Talk, 1966 ************************************************** ********* Walk in Dry Places There are no coincidences Guidance Here's an exercise that can strengthen your belief in a Higher Power: Review your life for seemingly insignificant things that were actually major turning points. A chance meeting, for example, may have resulted in an astonishing career opportunity for lifelong romance. Such surprises come to everybody, and people often wonder what their lives would have been like without these "coincidences." The founding of AA also seemed to be a series of coincidences and chance happenings. The message reached Bill W. by a circular route, and then an unexpected business opportunity took him to Akron, Ohio, where he finally met Dr. Bob. The unusual aspect was that Akron just "Happened" to have stalwart members of the Oxford Group, the same fellowship that had helped Bill W. People with strong spiritual foundations in AA have come to see these happenings not as coincidences but as the guidance of a Higher power. This Higher Power was…and is… continuously working through inspired people. We'll find similar chance happenings for good in our own lives. We don't control them except by keeping our own house in order. This assures us that the outcome of any " coincidence" will be favorable. I'll carry on my activities today without trying to second-guess what my Higher Power has in mind for me. At the same time, I'll know that a superior intelligence is directing my affairs in wonderful ways. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves. --- Step Fourof Alcoholics Anonymous. We avoid the Fourth Step. We put it off. We're scared of what we will find inside of us. We may find out we're mean, angry, selfish, afraid. We might see how badly we've acted to others, to ourselves. We have all these things inside us. We also have love, trust, faith, and hope. We love art, music, nature, or sports. We have power to heal, and we have used it too. The Fourth Step helps us to know our inner power. As we learn about our own power, we can use it carefully, on purpose, to do good. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me use my power to do Your will. Let your power work through me too. Action for the Day: Today Ill watch my own actions and words. I'll see how my power affects others. I'll talk about this with my sponsor. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning To be wildly enthusiastic, or deadly serious--both are wrong. Both pass. One must keep ever present a sense of humor. --Katherine Mansfield How familiar wild enthusiasm and deadly seriousness are to most of us. We experience life within the extremes. The thrill of wild enthusiasm we try to trap, to control. We are exhilarated and feel good. Our serious side traps us, controls us, lowers a pall on all our activities. Both expressions keep us stuck. Neither expression allows the freedom of spontaneity so necessary to a full, healthy life. Through our addiction--the liquor, the upper, the person, the food--we were searching for a feeling we didn't feel. We were searching for an unnatural state of happiness, even perhaps wild enthusiasm, because we had so little of any enthusiasm for life. Our search failed. Again and again we'd "catch it," only to have it elude us. We may not have given up the search. But we will come to accept both states of mind as temporary and search instead for the middle ground. A sense of humor will make all of life's loads easier to bear. A sense of humor will offer us the balance that has been missing for so many years. Today will offer me a chance to be wildly enthusiastic and a chance to be deadly serious. I'll try to focus on the middle ground and cultivate my sense of humor. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition WE AGNOSTICS When we saw others solve their problems by a simple reliance upon the Spirit of the Universe, we had to stop doubting the power of God. Our ideas did not work. But the God idea did. p. 52 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories He Sold Himself Short Occasionally, it is accorded to a few of us to watch something fine grow from a tiny kernel into something of gigantic goodness. Such has been my privilege, both nationally and in my home city. From a mere handful in Akron, we have spread in the Chicago area, commuting to Akron, we now exceed six thousand. p. 266 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Tradition Twelve - "Anonymity is the spiritual foundation of all our traditions, ever reminding us to place principles before personalities." When the Big Book appeared in 1939, we called it "Alcoholics Anonymous." Its foreword mad this revealing statement: "It is important that we remain anonymous because are too few, at present, to handle the overwhelming number of personal appeals which may result from this publication. Being mostly business or professional folk, we could not well carry on our occupations in such an event." Between these lines, it is easy to read our fear that large numbers of incoming people might break our anonymity wide open. pp. 184-185 ************************************************** ********* And when you have reached the mountain top, then you shall begin to climb. --Kahlil Gibran God, help me own my power to love and appreciate myself. Help me give myself validity instead of looking to others to do that. --Melody Beattie "I have held many things in my hands, and I have lost them all; but whatever I have placed in Gods hands, that I still possess." Fear is everywhere, and many fears lie within us, whether screaming loudly or sitting dormant. We must cast away fear, as we would the plague. --SweetyZee To help each other, is to help ourselves. C A R E = Comforting And Reassuring Each other. ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation TIME "I would I could stand on a busy corner, hat in hand, and beg people throw me their wasted hours." --Bernard Berenson I enjoy my sobriety so much that I hate to waste my time. Part of my spiritual program involves a correct use of time. I will not spend time with negative or destructive people. I will not spend time in useless gossip or doing things I do not enjoy to please other people. I am enjoying life so much I do not wish to waste any of it. Spirituality involves a creative stewardship of time. As an alcoholic I wasted so much time. For most of my life I was "out to lunch"! Today I spend time enjoying my life - and I spend quality time alone with "self". I enjoy my little conversations with self - the thoughts I have and need to ponder upon. I need time to rest in the peace of my life. Time is a precious gift from God that should not be wasted. Lord, let me live each day as if it were my last. ************************************************** ********* "May you be blessed by the Lord." Psalm 115:15 Since you have heard all about him and have learned the truth that is in Jesus, throw off your old evil nature and your former way of life, which is rotten through and through, full of lust and deception. Instead, there must be a spiritual renewal of your thoughts and attitudes. You must display a new nature because you are a new person, created in God's likeness--righteous, holy, and true. So put away all falsehood and "tell your neighbor the truth" because we belong to each other. And "don't sin by letting anger gain control over you." Don't let the sun go down while you are still angry, for anger gives a mighty foothold to the Devil. If you are a thief, stop stealing. Begin using your hands for honest work, and then give generously to others in need. Don't use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them. And do not bring sorrow to God's Holy Spirit by the way you live. Remember, he is the one who has identified you as his own, guaranteeing that you will be saved on the day of redemption. Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of malicious behavior. Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you. Ephesians 4:21-32 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration It is the little bits of kindness and love that make this world happy. Lord, may I do my part to make today happy for someone. Have the courage to forgive. Lord, may I bring myself to a place of peace by never holding a grudge. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Love And Addiction "Some of us first saw the effects of addiction on the people closest to us. We were very dependent on them to carry us through life. We felt angry, disappointed, and hurt when they found other interests, friends, and loved ones." Basic Text p. 7 Addiction affected every area of our lives. Just as we sought the drug that would make everything alright, so we sought people to fix us. We made impossible demands, driving away those who had anything of worth to offer us. Often, the only people left were those who were themselves too needy to be capable of denying our unrealistic expectations. It's no wonder that we were unable to establish and maintain healthy intimate relationships in our addiction. Today, in recovery, we've stopped expecting drugs to fix us. If we still expect people to fix us, perhaps it's time to extend our recovery program to our relationships. We begin by admitting we have a problem—that we don't know the first thing about how to have healthy intimate relationships. We seek out members who've had similar problems and have found relief. We talk with them and listen to what they share about this aspect of their recovery. We apply the program to all our affairs, seeking the same kind of freedom in our relationships that we find throughout our recovery. Just for today: Loving relationships are within my reach. Today, I will examine the effects of addiction on my relationships so that I can begin seeking recovery. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Then Bacchus. . .gave him the choice of making a wish come true. . . . So Midas said, "Make everything I touch turn gold." --Ovid Poor King Midas, already rich as a king, was made poorer by his poor wish. Everything he touched--small shoots, wet clay, a ripe head of wheat, apples from a tree--all suddenly went bad, turned into gold, pure gold. And how could he eat when bread and fruits, even fresh running water, suddenly shined at him, yellow, hard, and cold? He could have wished for a wiser, smaller success. He could have had all familiar things turn kind at his touch, or loving and good. Then imagine how he would have touched everyone he came near. If some wishes are too good to be true, are others too bad? You are reading from the book Touchstones. Any idea, person or object can be a Medicine Wheel, a mirror for man. The tiniest flower can be such a mirror, as can a wolf, a story, a touch, a religion, or a mountaintop. --Hyemeyohsts Storm The ancient spiritual teachings of the Cheyenne Indians tell us that we meet ourselves in almost everything we confront. A group of men spending a night on a mountaintop will each have a different experience. One may be overcome with a sense of awe, another may spend every moment gripped by fear, and another may sleep the night away. While the mountain is the same, each has brought himself to it and has a different experience. When we meet an animal, feel a touch, or take a hike down the street, we see a reflection of ourselves and of humanity. This day is a Medicine Wheel for each of us. Our response to today's circumstances will tell us more about ourselves. We need not waste energy judging ourselves harshly, but learn from our feelings and reactions. Our reflections point the way for further growth. Today, I will look for my own reflection in what I meet and for the reflection of all humanity. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. To be wildly enthusiastic, or deadly serious--both are wrong. Both pass. One must keep ever present a sense of humor. --Katherine Mansfield How familiar wild enthusiasm and deadly seriousness are to most of us. We experience life within the extremes. The thrill of wild enthusiasm we try to trap, to control. We are exhilarated and feel good. Our serious side traps us, controls us, lowers a pall on all our activities. Both expressions keep us stuck. Neither expression allows the freedom of spontaneity so necessary to a full, healthy life. Through our addiction--the liquor, the upper, the person, the food--we were searching for a feeling we didn't feel. We were searching for an unnatural state of happiness, even perhaps wild enthusiasm, because we had so little of any enthusiasm for life. Our search failed. Again and again we'd "catch it," only to have it elude us. We may not have given up the search. But we will come to accept both states of mind as temporary and search instead for the middle ground. A sense of humor will make all of life's loads easier to bear. A sense of humor will offer us the balance that has been missing for so many years. Today will offer me a chance to be wildly enthusiastic and a chance to be deadly serious. I'll try to focus on the middle ground and cultivate my sense of humor. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Going Easy Go easy. You may have to push forward, but you don't have to push so hard. Go in gentleness - go in peace. Do not be in so much of a hurry. At no day, no hour, no time are you required to do more than you can do in peace. Frantic behaviors and urgency are not the foundation for our new way of life. Do not be in too much of a hurry to begin. Begin, but do not force the beginning if it is not time. Beginnings will arrive soon enough. Enjoy and relish middles, the heart of the matter. Do not be in too much of a hurry to finish. You may be almost done, but enjoy the final moments. Give yourself fully to those moments so that you may give and get all there is. Let the pace flow naturally. Move forward. Start. Keep moving forward. Do it gently, though. Do it in peace. Cherish each moment. Today, God, help me focus on a peaceful pace rather than a harried one. I will keep moving forward gently, not frantically. Help me let go of my need to be anxious, upset, and harried. Help me replace it with a need to be a peace and in harmony. I accept myself today and am grateful that I can grow from where I am. As I bring more and more love to myself, I continue to blossom and expand, growing to be the best of who I can be. --Ruth Fishel ****************************************** Journey To The Heart Learn to Clear Your Path I met a woman at the mineral springs in Ojo Caliente, New Mexico. She had a gentle, open way. She talked to me about rituals, about miracles, about change. “My husband and I badly wanted a child, but I couldn’t get pregnant,” she said. “One night, I decided to go to a mikvah, a Jewish ritual bath. My decision felt powerful. But every obstacle you could imagine happened when I tried to get there. I could barely get out of my house. Then when I did, I got lost and had to go back home for directions. When I finally got to the bath, it was just beginning, but I knew I needed to be there. The night was electric. The air felt as if it were charged with lightning. It was a full moon. I went through the ritual and returned home. That night, my daughter was conceived. She’s now seven years old. There are often obstacles on our path. Roadblocks, barricades, detours. Things to go over, around, or under. Sometimes, the roadblocks are telling us no, this door isn’t opening. Find another way. Other times the roadblocks are telling us that the road we have chosen is very special. If we want to go down it, we will have to try. We will have to focus. We will have to muster our energy and show the world how badly we want it. We will have to overcome each and every obstacle, one by one, as they appear. What do you want badly? Are you willing to go through an obstacle course, if need be, to achieve it? Are you willing to be tested by the universe? Are you willing to focus, push forward, go the distance? Sometimes, the road ahead is blocked, but clearing the way becomes part of our journey. Learn to tell when it’s time to let go, to surrender, to search for another road, a different path, another dream. But also learn to tell when it’s time to move forward, through obstacles if need be, because the dream is electric, charged by Divine energy and love. ****************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Learn to say what It was one of those luxurious mornings. The surf was pounding– just loud enough to be heard. We stood on the balcony, watching the rising tide. “It’s rhythms vary so much,” I said. “Sometimes you can’t walk on the beach in the morning. Other times it’s way up in the late afternoon.” Then I pointed out a spot about a hundred feet away.” And sometimes it’s way out there.” “We really need to get a tide chart to help us understand what’s going on. A lot of businesses hand them out free.” Then, that thought and those words were gone. “Let’s go get some breakfast,” he said. “I have an idea,” I said. “Let’s go to the seafood place.” The traffic was gentle and easy that morning. We didn’t need reservations. We immedately got a place to sit. Twenty minutes later, we were picking away at a huge plate of crab legs and Key lime pie. It wasn’t on the breakfast menu, but it was what we wanted, we said. Next we drove down to the cove, a hidden inlet down the coast. We had to walk and walk to get there. And once we did, we still had to walk down a hundred stairs. So we slid and clambered down the hill instead. We wandered around the tiny bay, getting our feet wet and dirty in the sand. We climbed on rocks and stared at each of the beautiful things we saw, things that God made. “What’s this?” I said, barely touching a round ball of prickly things. “A sea anemone,” he said. I didn’t want to touch it completely, so I picked up a piece of a shell and touched the anemone with that. The prickly, fuzzy ball of stuff just opened up and sucked that crab shell in. Crunch. Crunch. I giggled. I wanted to see it do it again. We strolled around the bay. Starfish, rocks, and pretty shells lined the way. “No Nude Bathing,” a weathered sign commanded. A patrol helicopter flew by, just to make certain we compled. We climbed back up to the street. We didn’t use the stairs this time either. When we got back in the car, we drove to town again. The surf shop was open, so we ambled on in. We looked at sunglasses, wet suits, kayaks, and shorts. We didn’t want to buy anything, so we said thanks and headed out the door. As we were leaving the store, a man suddenly burst out after us, shouting and waving something in his hand. “Don’t forget your tide chart,” he said, giving the little booklet to us. We looked at each other, then laughed out loud. Even though we had forgotten what we said we wanted, the universe remembered and insisted on giving it to us. There’s a lot of things we have to let go of. Probably everything, in fact. But it’s important to say what we want first– before we let go– because sometimes when we let go, what we want comes back to us. An important part of speaking the language of letting go means learning to identify and say what we want. ****************************************** In God’s Care The manner in which one endures what must be endured is more important than the thing that must be endured. ~~Dean Acheson Nearly every day most of us experience a few small, though troubling, inconveniences. Some days we suffer through a major setback and, on occasion, even a personal tragedy. When we trust that God is in our life, and we look for comfort and guidance every moment of every day, we are prepared for any upset, whether minor or grave. Practicing the presence of God provides us with a refuge, even in the throes of turmoil. In time, as we make this a daily routine, we’ll seldom doubt God’s closeness or feel forsaken, even when all about us is dark. The darkness will give way to the light of hope in the mere moment it takes to remember God’s presence. We can endure whatever lesson today offers with confidence and hope and the security of knowing that God is both teacher and protector. I will go through this day confidently in the presence of my Higher Power. ****************************************** Symbols of Versatility Ducks by Madisyn Taylor We can learn a lot from our duck friends as they are able dive deep but also have the ability to float gracefully. If you are lucky enough to live in a part of the world that is also a home to ducks, you will no doubt be familiar with the image of their cute feathery bottoms sticking up in the air as their heads disappear under the surface of the water. Perhaps you’ve even taken a moment to wonder what they see in their underwater world, and if they will resurface with a fish or a water bug in their beaks. As we observe them, we see that ducks are denizens of three worlds—the world of air, the world of water, and the world of earth. As such, they have adapted themselves to be able to swim, fly, and walk, and they seek and find nourishment in more than one place. They are symbols of versatility and can inspire us to explore our own ability to adapt and find nourishment in a variety of places. Ducks are able to float, swim, and dive into the water, fishing for food. They can walk on the ground, eating vegetation and bugs, and they fly in the air to travel long distances relatively quickly. Equipped with feet that are equally good at paddling and walking, as well as wings to fly, ducks seem comfortable in just about any natural environment. Next time you see a duck bottom, you might be inspired to examine your own ability to both float on the surface and to dive beneath it. In many traditions, water symbolizes the emotions—to duck our heads into our emotions means we are able to surrender our minds to our hearts, to go into the watery realm of feeling and see what there is to see, often coming to the surface with nourishment and treasure. At the same time, we share the duck’s ability to get solid ground under our feet by connecting to the earth on which we live simply by walking on it. And finally, when we reside in our spirits, we fly above the mental, emotional, and material realms, free of all the ties that bind us to this earth, traveling faster and farther than we ever thought possible. Published with permission from Daily OM ****************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day If we don’t want to slip, we’ll avoid slippery places. For the alcoholic, that means avoiding old drinking haunts; for the overeater, that means by-passing a once-favorite pastry shop; for the gambler, that means shunning poker parties and race tracks. For me, certain emotional situations can also be slippery places; so can indulgence of old ideas such as a well pronourished resentment that is allowed to build to explosive proportions. Do I carry the principles of The Program with me wherever I go? Today I Pray May I learn not to test myself too harshly by “asking for it,” by stopping in at the bar or the bakery or the track. Such “testing” can be dangerous, especially if I am egged on, not only by a thirst or an appetite or a craving for the old addiction, but by others still caught in it whose moral responsibility has been reduced to zero. Today I Will Remember Avoid slippery places. ****************************************** One More Day Spring is a happiness so beautiful, so unique, so unexpected, that I don’t know what to do with my heart. – Emily Dickinson Remember the sheer joy of spring during childhood? How we would race around the backyard, checking out the wonderful sights and smells. Spring in those days meant no more snow pants and boots. It meant being able to dash out with just a light sweater and no admonishments from Mom. And most importantly, the new season heralded a few short months until summer vacation. We can recapture our youthful openness, for that child is still within us. We can smell the same scents, experience the same joy, but when the depth of understanding we have gained as adults. Regardless of our level of independence, regardless of whether we can plant the garden or just enjoy its flowers, spring can still delight us. My heart sill delights in spring. I am grateful to be here to absorb it all. ***************************************** One Day At A Time HAPPINESS Happiness is an achievement brought about by inner productiveness. People succeed at being happy by building a liking for themselves. Erich Fromm It has been said that if one of us ever treated another human being the way we treated ourselves, we would be liable for criminal charges. I did not treat myself as a friend, someone I loved; I constantly fed into my unhappiness. Alcoholics Anonymous co-founder Bill W. was asked, shortly before he died, to sum up the program in the lowest common denominator. He replied, "Get right with yourself, with God, then with your neighbor." Therefore, it stands to reason that I must start making friends with myself. I must treat myself with love and dignity, and the result will be happiness. To be happy, joyous, and free is the by-product of obedience to the program. One Day at a Time . . . Am I going to try being happy? Am I going to make friends with myself? If not today, when? ~ Jeremiah ~ ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote When we saw others solve their problems by a simple reliance upon the Spirit of the Universe, we had to stop doubting the power of God. Our ideas did not work. But the God idea did. - Pg. 52 - We Agnostics Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Things go wrong and they are not particularly anyone's fault. You can't expect every meeting to be perfect, all the words you hear perfect wisdom, your treatment center to meet every need, or court rulings in your favor. You will experience many imperfect actions and reactions. You know you can't control or fix everything that goes wrong and neither can 'they.' I correct only the things that are under my immediate control and I allow other imperfections to be corrected by others, or not corrected at all. What a relief. A Still Small Voice I will have faith. I will follow that still small voice within me. When I have doubts, which of course I will have, I will reach down within myself and pull up something that I thought wasn't even there, I'll pull up faith that things will be all right. Whether or not things are going just the way I want them to, I'll have faith that they will somehow right themselves in the end. It will work out, or it won't work out, but still, all will be OK. I will give myself the gift of faith. My faith sustains me - Tian Dayton PhD "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Is your program powered by Will Power or Higher Power? Time for Joy - Book - Quote I accept myself today and am grateful that I can grow from where I am. As I bring more and more love to myself, I continue to blossom and expand, growing to be the best of who I can be. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote Don't miss this (AA). If you do, you won't miss what's coming. - Bruce from Manly Australia. |
April 2
Daily Reflections CHARACTER BUILDING Demands made upon other people for too much attention, protection, and love can only invite domination or revulsion.... TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 44 When I uncovered my need for approval in the Fourth Step, I didn't think it should rank as a character defect. I wanted to think of it more as an asset (that is, the desire to please people). It was quickly pointed out to me that this "need" can be very crippling. Today I still enjoy getting the approval of others, but I am not willing to pay the price I used to pay to get it. I will not bend myself into a pretzel to get others to like me. If I get your approval, that's fine; but if I don't, I will survive without it. I am responsible for speaking what I perceive to be the truth, not what I think others may want to hear. Similarly, my false pride always kept me overly concerned about my reputation. Since being enlightened in the A.A. program, my aim is to improve my character. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day Since I've been in A.A., have I made a start toward becoming more loving to my family and friends? Do I visit my parents? Am I more appreciative of my spouse than I was before? Am I grateful to my family for having put up with me? Have I found real understanding with my children? Do I feel that the friends I've found in A.A. are real friends? Do I believe that they are always ready to help me and do I want to help them if I can? Do I really care now about other people? Meditation For The Day Not what you do so much as what you are, that is the miracle- working power. You can be a force for good, with the help of God. God is here to help you and to bless you, here to company with you. You can be a worker with God. Changed by God's grace, you shed one garment of the spirit for a better one. In time, you throw that one aside for a yet finer one. And so from character to character, you are gradually transformed. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may accept every challenge. I pray that each acceptance of a challenge may make me grow into a better person. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Walking Toward Serenity, p. 92 "When I was tired and couldn't concentrate, I used to fall back on an affirmation toward life that took the form of simple walking and deep breathing. I sometimes told myself that I couldn't do even this--that I was too weak. But I learned that this was the point at which I could not give in without becoming still more depressed. "So I would set myself at a small stint. I would determine to walk a quarter of a mile. And I would concentrate by counting my breathing--say, six steps to each slow inhalation and four to each exhalation. Having done the quarter-mile, I found that I could go on, maybe a half-mile more. Then another half-mile, and maybe another. "This was encouraging. The false sense of physical weakness would leave me (this feeling being so characteristic of depressions). The walking and especially the breathing were powerful affirmations toward life and living and away from failure and death. The counting represented a minimum discipline in concentration, to get some rest from the wear and tear of fear and guilt." Letter, 1960 ************************************************** ********* Walk in Dry Places Accepting Risk Facing Reality. Like it or not, life seems to have certain risks that just can't be avoided. Alcoholics are not really comfortable with risk-taking. This is especially true in situations that include risk of rejection, risk of defeat, or risk of loss. If we try to get through life without accepting some risk, however, we're simply not being realistic. The refusal to accept risk may also mean that we miss wonderful opportunities in the process. What should we do? We should face risk intelligently and with spiritual preparation. FIRST, we do everything possible to reduce risk in any situation (thus making it a "calculated risk"). THEN we pray for guidance and inspiration (but not a certain outcome). FINALLY, we do our very best to succeed in the situation, whether it's a courtship, a job search, competition in sports, or whatever. We might surprise ourselves by succeeding more times than we fail. But even in temporary failure, we gain if we follow through in accepting reasonable and necessary risks. I'll exercise prudence and good judgment in all my undertakings today, but I won't expect to be able to "play it safe" in everything. As a human being, I have to take risks in life. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple To know all things is not permitted.--- Horace In recovery, we give up trying to be perfect. We give up trying to know everything. We work at coming to know and accept our short-comings. In Step Four and Five, we look at our good points and our bad points. In Step Six, we become ready to have our Higher Power remove our "defects of character." Then in Step Seven we ask our Higher Power to remove our "shortcomings." Recovery is about coming to accept that we're not prefect. We admit that trying to be perfect got in the way of being useful to ourselves, our Higher Power, and those around us. Pretending to be prefect doesn't allow us to be real. It's also boring and no fun---you never get to mess up. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, You will let me know what I need to know. Allow me to claim my mistakes and shortcomings. Action for the Day: I will work at being okay today. Not prefect, just okay. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Courage is the price that life exacts for granting peace. --Amelia Earhart We have learned from experience that a wave of peacefulness washes over us after we have successfully finished a task that was difficult to face. Courage has its reward. However, from time to time, and from task to task, we find we need the reminder that peace will come once the loose ends have been tied by us. Our search for peace was desperate and unending in past years. Our fears overwhelmed us more often than not. Courage was seldom displayed. Tasks were often left half done or not done at all. Challenges went unmet. And peace eluded us. We are so lucky that the program found us, and that we found the program! We are looking forward, at last, with the courage that trusting a higher power has given us. Peace is ours, now and always, as we go forth with the strength of the program to bolster us. New jobs, new friends, new situations may still elicit our old fears. But their hold on us is gone. We have learned that we face nothing alone. What relief that simple truth brings. Courage is one of the program's gifts. I will have courage to go forward: to meet the new day, to handle whatever confronts me. Peace is coupled with courage, now and forever. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition WE AGNOSTICS The Wright brothers’ almost childish faith that they could build a machine which would fly was the mainspring of their accomplishment. Without that, nothing could have happened. We agnostics and atheists were sticking to the idea that self-sufficiency would solve our problems. When others showed us that “God-sufficiency" worked with them, we began to feel like those who had insisted the Wrights would never fly. pp. 52-53 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories He Sold Himself Short These last eighteen years have been the happiest of my life, trite though that statement may seem. Fifteen of those years I would not have enjoyed had I continued drinking. Doctors told me before I stopped that I had only three years at the outside to live. p. 266 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Tradition Twelve - "Anonymity is the spiritual foundation of all our traditions, ever reminding us to place principles before personalities." As the A.A. groups multiplied, so did anonymity problems. Enthusiastic over the spectacular recovery of a brother alcoholic, we'd sometimes discuss those intimate and harrowing aspects of his case meant for his sponsor's ear alone. The aggrieved victim would then rightly declare that his trust had been broken. When such stories got into circulation outside of A.A., the loss of confidence in our anonymity promise was severe. It frequently turned people from us. Clearly, every A.A. member's name--and story, too---had to be confidential, if he wished. This was our first lesson in the practical application of anonymity. p. 185 ************************************************** ********* "Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there." --Will Rogers Laughter is by definition healthy. --Doris Lessing He who laughs, lasts. --Mary Pettibone Poole The best portion of a good man's life is in his little nameless, unremembered acts of kindness and of love. --William Wordsworth No act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted. --Aesop Wise sayings often fall on barren ground; but a kind word is never thrown away. --Arthur Helps "We get so much in the habit of wearing a disguise before others that we eventually appear disguised before ourselves." --Jim Bishop ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation PROBLEMS "The real problem is in the hearts and minds of men." --Albert Einstein We are facing not so much a "drug problem" as a people problem - and this requires a solution from the people. I believe the solution and recovery has already been given by God, but it must be discovered from within. We need to seek out what is truly in our minds and hearts: what are our problems, what are our needs, what do we long for, where are we going in our lives? Today it is not enough for me to know my problems, I need also to talk about them. Today I choose to express my feelings. God, I thank You for the creative gift of communication. ************************************************** ********* O, come, let us worship and bow down: let us kneel before the LORD our maker. For he is our God; and we are the people of his pasture, and the sheep of his hand. Today if ye will hear his voice. Psalm 95:6-7 When you lie down you will not be afraid; when you lie down , your sleep will be sweet. Proverbs 3:24 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration There are always better things to come than that which we have left behind. Lord, I look with excitement toward the enexpected joys of today. Forget what you have done for others and remember what they have done for you. Lord, a gift is given freely with no expection. May I become a truly giving person. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Attraction "Our public image consists of what we have to offer: a successful, proven way of maintaining a drug-free lifestyle." Basic Text p. 72 Yes, we are attracting new members. More and more addicts are finding Narcotics Anonymous. But how do we treat our newest members when they arrive, worn out from their struggles with addiction? Do we reach out to newcomers who are standing by themselves at our meetings, confused and uncertain? Are we willing to give them rides to meetings? Do we still work one-on-one with the addict who suffers? Do we give out our phone numbers? Are we eager to go on a Twelfth Step call, even if it means getting up from our comfortable beds in the middle of the night? Will we work with someone who has a different sexual orientation or is from another culture? Are we generous with the gift of our time? No doubt we were met with love and acceptance by our fellow addicts. What attracted many of us to Narcotics Anonymous was the feeling that we had finally found a place where we belonged. Are we offering that same sense of belonging to our newer members? We cannot promote Narcotics Anonymous. But when we put principles into action in our lives, we attract newer members to the NA way, just as we were attracted to recovery. Just for today: I will work with a newcomer. I will remember that I was once a newcomer myself. I will seek to attract others with the same sense of belonging I've found in NA. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. It is wealth to be content. --Lao-tzu On the evening of the first day of spring, a woman gave her husband a bright red geranium in a clay pot. To celebrate, he placed it on the windowsill, and together they marveled at the delicate petals. In the harsher light of morning, though, the man frowned at the geranium and said to his wife, "How shabby it makes the sofa look." They spent the day at the furniture store and came home with a new couch, blue with red flowers, like the geranium. They placed the couch in front of the windowsill and admired together its grace and line and fashionable upholstery. But the next morning, the man frowned at the couch and said, "How shabby it makes the carpet look." Soon they had a lavish new carpet, which led to new curtains, lamps, and chairs. When the room was completely redone, they set the geranium back in the window and surveyed the finest room in the neighborhood. The man frowned. "The geranium," he said, "it's out of place. It will have to go." Will I be able to appreciate life's simple pleasures today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. The universe is the primary revelation of the divine, the primary scripture, the primary focus of divine human communion. --Thomas Berry In this program we learn about being receptive. A man in search of conscious contact with a Higher Power can simply stand still and open his eyes and ears to creation. Forcing a spiritual awareness is mostly wasted effort. Learning theology doesn't create a spiritual experience either. We only need to see and hear what is around us. This is a vast and marvelous universe, and it speaks for itself. It has always been there, and when we are ready to receive the message, we will. It stirs our spirit to be at a meeting and hear another man describe the awakening of his spirituality. As we men become more receptive to the spiritual, we open a whole new realm in our lives. May my growing ability to be a receptive man lead me to a deeper spiritual contact. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Courage is the price that life exacts for granting peace. --Amelia Earhart We have learned from experience that a wave of peacefulness washes over us after we have successfully finished a task that was difficult to face. Courage has its reward. However, from time to time, and from task to task, we find we need the reminder that peace will come once the loose ends have been tied by us. Our search for peace was desperate and unending in past years. Our fears overwhelmed us more often than not. Courage was seldom displayed. Tasks were often left half done or not done at all. Challenges went unmet. And peace eluded us. We are so lucky that the program found us, and that we found the program! We are looking forward, at last, with the courage that trusting a higher power has given us. Peace is ours, now and always, as we go forth with the strength of the program to bolster us. New jobs, new friends, new situations may still elicit our old fears. But their hold on us is gone. We have learned that we face nothing alone. What relief that simple truth brings. Courage is one of the program's gifts. I will have courage to go forward: to meet the new day, to handle whatever confronts me. Peace is coupled with courage, now and forever. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Facing Our Darker Side Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves. --Step Four of Al Anon By the time we get to the Fourth of the Twelve Steps, we are ready to face our darker side, the side that prevents us from loving others, from letting others love us, and from enjoying life and ourselves. The purpose of Step Four is not to make ourselves feel worse; our purpose is to begin to remove our blocks to joy and love. We look for fears, anger, hurt, and shame from past events--buried feelings that may be affecting our life today. We search for subconscious beliefs about others and ourselves that may be interfering with the quality of our relationships. These beliefs say: Im not lovable. . .. Im a burden to those around me. . .. People cant be trusted. . . . I cant be trusted . . .. I don't deserve to be happy and successful. . .. Life isn't worth living. We look at our behaviors and patterns with an eye toward discerning the self-defeating ones. With love and compassion for ourselves, we try to unearth all our guilt - earned and unearned - and expose it to the light. We perform this examination without fear of what we shall find, because this soul searching can cleanse us and help us feel better about ourselves than we ever dreamt possible. God, help me search out the blocks and barriers within myself. Bring what I need to know into my conscious mind, so I can be free of it. Show me what I need to know about myself. Today I wait in peace and rest in the knowledge that God is working for me while I am resting. --Ruth Fishel ****************************************** Journey To The Heart Discover the Power of Meditation I saw Spirit Rock Center, a meditation center, as I drove along the highway in Northern California. I turned into the parking lot and watched as people moved about the grounds very slowly. They were practicing a walking meditation. Meditation teaches us to relax, to connect with our body, to let spirit and body become one. Many of us spent years abandoning ourselves, our emotions, and our bodies. We’ve been present for others, and now is the time for us to stay present for ourselves, fully and completely. Meditation helps us leave our routine for a bit and slow down. We deliberately exhale stress, tension, and fear. Then we inhale light, beauty, peace, and love. We slow our minds and slow our bodies until we reach that quiet place. Meditation can renew us and help us return to our lives refreshed. Meditate. Take time to inhale peace and exhale fear. Then take your meditation back to your life. Walk slowly. Stay present for yourself, more fully and completely than ever before. You too can turn your life into a walking, waking, deliberate meditation. ****************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Learn to say yes Learn to say yes, and mean it. How long has it been since you’ve said yes to someone in your life? Yes, I’d like to do that. Yes, that sounds good to me. Yes, I’ll take a chance. How long has it been since you’ve said yes to yourself? Yes, I recognize what you’re feeling. Yes, I heard what you want. Yes, I realize you’re tired. Yes, we’ll rest for a while. When opportunities come our way– whether for personal, spiritual, or business growth– don’t always be so cautious and shy. So what if yes means you’re not living up to someone’s expectations? Sometimes we learn to say no so well that saying no becomes a habit. We don’t even consider what we’re turning down. A well timed yes is as important in manifesting our power as learning to say no. It’s a sign of an open heart. Next time someone asks you out, suggests an opportunity, or your body tries to talk to you, stop, Instead of immediately saying no, like a parent on automatic pilot, listen to the offer. Could it be an important one? Something that might help guide you along your path? Maybe you’re scared. Maybe you’re worried that you aren’t up to the occasion. Maybe you like the safety of saying no all the time. Learn to say yes to life. Honesty, openness, and willingness to try. Hmmmm. Sounds a lot like yes to me. God, help me learn to say yes and mean it, when that’s the appropriate response. ****************************************** In God’s Care God does not comfort us to make us comfortable but to make us comforters. ~~J. H. Jowett We weren’t in any kind of condition to comfort others when we were in the grips of our addictions. It’s only now when we have been blessed with comfort for ourselves, that we can turn our attention to others. Now that we can, we discover another spiritual paradox: We find comfort in giving comfort. It is part of the “to-give-is-to-receive” principle. Perhaps we didn’t come by our addictions accidentally. There’s a purpose for each of us, and comforting others is part of our purpose. God relies on us to carry the message, as those who went before us brought it to us. That’s why we can never be complacent about our progress. The minute we isolate ourselves from others, discomfort sets in – for us and for those who need the comfort of our presence. My comfort depends on being a comforter. ****************************************** The Life Cycle Bud and Blossom and Beyond by Madisyn Taylor It is through watching the cycles of nature that we more fully understand the cycles of our own lives. Flowers and leaves both begin their lives as organisms so tiny we cannot see them with the naked eye. With time, they become visible, curled in upon themselves, colorful buds slowly softening and releasing. With the proper warmth and moisture, they unfold little by little, revealing with each degree of opening a new color, shape, or dimension. Sometimes buds open seemingly all at once, unfolding the full majesty of their potential, of what looks to the human eye like courage, openness, and generosity. As days go by, the bloom slowly moves through more stages, revealing still more colors, shapes, and dimensions of its essence. It falls apart, strewing its petals on the ground, or it wilts, or it closes back in on itself. When we can appreciate the full beauty of each stage of the cycle of life, from bud to blossom to disintegration, we feel more at home with our own earthly process. We can be inspired not to hold back the fullness of what we have to offer, knowing that our time to give of ourselves in this way will come to pass. At the same time, we can honor others, and the little processes that go on within the larger process of living our lives. Each stage we go through has its time of fulfillment and recession, as do all living things. Every moment of every stage has its own particular beauty, and we can appreciate that, even as most of us tend to love the spectacular moment of full blossoming most of all. When we feel the wisdom contained in the budding, blossoming, and dissolution of a simple flower, we begin to feel it everywhere, in each moment that comes and goes, in each sunrise and sunset, in every hello and goodbye, as the very essence of the pulsating ebb and flow of existence. Published with permission from Daily OM ****************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day What causes slips? What happens to a person who apparently seems to understand and live the way of The Program, yet decides to go out again? What can I do to keep this from happening to me? Is there any consistency among those who slip, any common denominators that seem to apply? We can each draw our own conclusions, but we learn in The Program that certain in-actions will all but guarantee an eventual slip. When a person who has slipped is fortunate enough to return to The Program, do I listen carefully to what he or she says about the slip? Today I Pray May my Higher Power — if I listen to Him — show me if I am setting myself up to get high again. May I glean from the experiences of others that the reasons for such a lapse of resolve or such an accident of will most often stem from what I have not done rather than from what I have done. May I “keep coming back” to meetings. Today I Will Remember Keep Coming Back. ****************************************** One More Day The joy of life is to put out one’s power in some natural and useful or harmless way. There is no other, and the real misery is not to do this. – Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr. If our health changes and fatigue are frequent problems, we may become unable to do all we did for ourselves in the past. If we push ourselves too far, something will suffer. We may pay with our joints or we may pay with depression. But we do pay. If we liken our daily energy level to money in a bank account, we realize we can make only so many withdrawals before our resources run out. We decide each day how we want to spend — or waste — that precious energy. It takes a while to get our priorities rearranged, but living a good life is important, and eventually we learn how to invest our energy well. Each day presents itself new and fresh. It’s up to me to decide how to spend my energy. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~ Love ~ There is only one happiness in life ... to love and be loved. George Sand It took me many, many years to really and truly discover what turned out to be something that I have yearned for all of my life. That "something" was love ~ both the ability to love and to accept love. As a child, I felt I had to achieve to be loved and, in the process of achieving, lost a great deal of my childhood. This carried over to adulthood and thus began the years of doing what was expected of me (or so I thought) in order to be loved, valued and respected. Recovery has taught me so much about myself and about love. One of the greatest truths I have learned about myself and my ability to love is that for me to love someone, it is not necessary that they love me back. My loving someone else never depends on their loving me ... but how wonderful it is when they do. One Day at a Time . . . Let me realize that love is something that just happens ... I can't make it happen ... and I can't stop it from happening. ~ Mari ~ ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote We were having trouble with personal relationships, we couldn't control our emotional natures, we were a prey to misery and depression, we couldn't make a living, we had a feeling of uselessness, we were full of fear, we were unhappy, we couldn't seem to be of real help to other people - was not a basic solution of these bedevilments more important than whether we should see newsreels of lunar flight? Of course it was. - Pg. 52 - We Agnostics Hour To Hour - Book - Quote The darker the shadow, the brighter the Light. As we stop using and leave the shadow of drug addiction, we slowly begin to see the new light of our life. Sometimes its so bright, it hurts. We are not used to it. God, as I understand You, as I clean up and the Light of recovery hurts, help me understand, adjust, and be grateful to leave the shadow. I Have Faith I rely on faith. Faith sustains me and guides me. Faith is my constant companion. It leads me through passages of terrifying darkness and blinding light. Faith allows me to weave my life into a coherent whole, to walk on a path that others have lit, to strike out on my own and cut my way through the underbrush. There is nothing in my life that faith doesn't make better. There is no day that faith doesn't give meaning and purpose to. There is no relationship that faith doesn't guide and sustain. I need my faith to live - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote Some people quote the Bible, Qur'an, Torah, or some other holy text claiming that it is your only road to recovery. You may or may not find that comforting. Whether or not it is comforting you, remember it is comforting them. Be tolerant and gracious. I may not find something personally helpful, but I find it helpful to be personable. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book First we work the program because we have to. Then we work the program because we are willing to. Finally we work the program because we want to. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I wait in peace and rest in the knowledge that God is working for me while I am resting. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote The thing I have to do for my personal recovery is to apply the Steps into my life. But the thing I owe to future generations of suffering alcoholics - and maybe my own children - is to maintain the fellowship with the simplicity, purity and integrity that I found when I came in. And the only way to do that is to pay careful attention to the Twelve Traditions of Alcoholics Anonymous. - Doug D. |
April 3
Daily Reflections ACCEPTING OUR HUMANNESS We finally saw that the inventory should be ours, not the other man's. So we admitted our wrongs honestly and became willing to set these matters straight. AS BILL SEES IT, p. 222 Why is it that the alcoholic is so unwilling to accept responsibility? I used to drink because of the things that other people did to me. Once I came to A.A. I was told to look at where I had been wrong. What did I have to do with all these different matters? When I simply accepted that I had a part in them, I was able to put it on paper and see it for what it was - humanness. I am not expected to be perfect! I have made errors before and I will make them again. To be honest about them allows me to accept them - and myself - and those with whom I had the differences; from there, recovery is just a short distance ahead. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day When I was drinking, I was absolutely selfish, I thought of myself first, last, and always. The universe revolved around me at the center. When I woke up in the morning with a hangover, my only thought was how terrible I felt and about what I could do to make myself feel better. And the only thing I could think of was more liquor. To quit was impossible. I couldn't see beyond myself and my own need for another drink. Can I now look out and beyond my own selfishness? Meditation For The Day Remember that the first quality of greatness is service. In a way, God is the greatest servant of all, because He is always waiting for us to call on Him to help us in all good endeavors. His strength is always available to us, but we must ask it of Him through our own free will. It is a free gift, but we must sincerely seek for it. A life of service is the finest life we can live. We are here on earth to serve others. That is the beginning and the end of our real worth. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may cooperate with God in all good things. I pray that I may serve God and others and so lead a useful and happy life. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Atmosphere Of Grace, p. 93 Those of us who have come to make regular use of prayer would no more do without it than we would refuse air, food, or sunshine. And for the same reason. When we refuse air, light, or food, the body suffers. And when we turn away from meditation and prayer, we likewise deprive our minds, our emotions, and our intuitions of vitally needed support. As the body can fail its purpose for lack of nourishment, so can the soul. We all need the light of God's reality, the nourishment of His strength, and the atmosphere of His grace. To an amazing extent the facts of A.A. life confirm this ageless truth. 12 & 12, pp. 97-98 ************************************************** ********* Walk in Dry Places More will be revealed Spiritual Growth There's an old saying, "To him that hath, more shall be given." That saying applies to our growth in AA. If we dedicate ourselves to the program, new information and understanding will continue to flow in our direction. This is not because God is singling us out for special favors. It's simply a law of life. When we are interested in a subject, we find more knowledge coming to us almost "Out of the blue" as we continue to seek it. It's almost as if hidden forces were gathering up ideas and pushing them in our direction. What's happened is that we have put ourselves in line for such growth. We have our antennae out, and we become conditioned to recognize useful ideas as they come to us. We are Open-Minded to our good. This same process has also led to more general knowledge about alcoholism. When the early AA's attained sobriety, most of the information about alcoholism was summed up in a handful of books. Now there are hundreds of books, symposia, and speeches dealing with the subject. More was revealed, and we can hope that even more will be revealed as we continue to focus on recovery. I can expect useful information to come to me from a number of sources. My interest in my recovery and self-improvement helps attract the information and understanding I need. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Rest is the guardian of health.---Melba Colgrave Now that we are sober, we're feeling better than we have in years. We're busy too. We attend meetings and visit friends. We have work, school, families, and homes to keep up with. It's easy to forget to rest. We forgot that our bodies and minds need time off. We need plenty of sleep each night. And we need a lazy weekend now and than to let our bodies recover from to go, go, go of daily life. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me listen to my body. Remind me to slow down and rest now and then. Action for the Day: How much have I rested lately? Have I gotten enough sleep each night? What can I do in the next two days to rest my body, mind, and spirit? ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Those who do not know how to weep with their whole heart don't know how to laugh either. --Golda Meir We all know people who live on the fringes of life. They seem uninvolved with the activity in their midst, as though a pane of glass separated them from us. And there are times when we join the persons standing alone away from the vibrancy of life. Fears keep people apart, particularly the fear of letting go of the vulnerable self and joining in the feelings of the moment. To fully reap the benefits of life, we have to risk full exposure to one another and to the experience of the moment. Full involvement in the ebb and flow of life will bring the weeping that accompanies both the pain and the joy of life. It will also bring the fruits of laughter. Both laughter and weeping cleanse us. They bring closure to an experience. They make possible our letting go. And we must let go of pain, as well as joy, to ready ourselves for the next blessing life offers us. When we keep ourselves apart, when we hold off the tears or the laughter, we cheat ourselves of the richness of life. We have to go through an experience fully in order to learn all it can teach us and then be free of it. Past experiences never let me go until I fully grieve those that need to be grieved or laugh over those that deserve the light touch. The present is distorted when the past shadows it. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition WE AGNOSTICS Logic is great stuff. We like it. We still like it. It is not by chance we were given the power to reason, to examine the evidence of our sense, and to draw conclusions. That is one of man’s magnificent attributes. We agnostically inclined would not feel satisfied with a proposal which does not lend itself to reasonable approach and interpretation. Hence we are at pains to tell why we think our present faith is reasonable, why we think it more sane and logical to believe than not to believe, why we say our former thinking was soft and mushy when we threw up our hands in doubt and said, “We don’t know.” p. 53 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories He Sold Himself Short This latest part of my life has had a purpose, not in great things accomplished but in daily living. Courage to face each day has replaced the fears and uncertainties of earlier years. Acceptance of things as they are has replaced the old impatient champing at the bit to conquer the world. I have stopped tilting at windmills and, instead, have tried to accomplish the little daily tasks, unimportant in themselves, but tasks that are an integral part of living fully. p. 266 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Tradition Twelve - "Anonymity is the spiritual foundation of all our traditions, ever reminding us to place principles before personalities." With characteristic intemperance, however, some of our newcomers cared not at all for secrecy. They wanted to shout A.A. from the housetops, and did. Alcoholics barely dry rushed about bright-eyed, buttonholing anyone who would listen to their stories. Others hurried to place themselves before microphones and cameras. Sometimes, they got distressingly drunk and let their groups down with a bang. They had changed from A.A. members into A.A. show-offs. p. 185 ************************************************** ********* "The great thing in the world is not so much where we stand, as in what direction we are moving." --Oliver Wendell Holmes "If a man is called to be a streetsweeper, he should sweep streets even as Michelangelo painted, or Beethoven composed music, or Shakespeare wrote poetry. He should sweep streets so well that all the hosts of heaven and earth will pause and say, here lived a great streetsweeper who did his job well." --Martin Luther King, Jr. "If it ain't broke, don't fix it." --Anon. A pint of example is worth a gallon of advice. --Unknown God, help me accept all the twists and turns along my path. Help me to say whatever to the good and the unfortunate incidents that come my way. --Melody Beattie ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation WONDER "Men love to wonder, and that is the seed of science" --Ralph Waldo Emerson In my sobriety the world is a wonderful place. I often sit back and am amazed at the splendor of life, at the simple happenings that give such joy, at the nobility that is revealed in man, at the creative adventure and mystery of life. I meditate in wonder. Now I see how drugs kept me blind from so much. Alcohol kept me a prisoner of mediocrity and much of the wonder of life passed me by. As a drinking alcoholic I existed in life, rather than lived life. I was a bored spectator rather than a participant. I reacted to things, rather than initiated events Alcoholism equals dullness. Recovery symbolized energy. Today I can dream dreams and rest in the wonder of it all. God is Good. O Lord, let me see the wonderful mystery of life even in the ordinary. ************************************************** ********* "Cast all your anxieties on him, for he cares about you." I Peter 5:7 "I will praise You, O Lord my God, with all my heart, and I will glorify Your name forevermore." Psalm 86:12 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration We are extremely precious to God and are never left alone not even for one second. Lord, Thank You for Your promise to protect and care for me always. It is important to remember that different can be better. Lord, as I resist change and cling to the familiar, help me to remember that Your plan is perfect and will truly make me happy. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today For You Alone "The idea of a spiritual awakening takes many different forms in the different personalities that we find in the fellowship." Basic Text p. 48 Though we all work the same steps, each of us experiences the spiritual awakening resulting from them in our own way. The shape that spiritual awakening takes in our lives will vary, depending on who we are. For some of us, the spiritual awakening promised in the Twelfth Step will result in a renewed interest in religion or mysticism. Others will awaken to an understanding of the lives of those around them, experiencing empathy perhaps for the first time. Still others will realize that the steps have awakened them to their own moral or ethical principles. Most of us experience our spiritual awakening as a combination of these things, each combination as unique as the individual who's been awakened. If there are so many different varieties of spiritual awakenings, how do we know if we've truly had one? The Twelfth Step provides us with two signs: We've found principles capable of guiding us well, the kind of principles we want to practice in all our affairs. And we've begun to care enough about other addicts to freely share with them the experience we've had. No matter what the details of our awakenings are like, we all are given the guidance and the love we need to live fulfilling, spiritually oriented lives. Just for today: Regardless of its particular shape, my spiritual awakening has helped me fill my place in the world with love and life. For that, I am grateful. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. If there is anything we wish to change in the child, we should first examine it and see whether it is not something that could be better changed in ourselves. --Carl Jung Children are smart. Remember how we used to imitate our parents' behavior? We'd dress up like them, mimic their words, even copy their attitudes. We wanted to be just like them because we thought they were the most wonderful people in the world. We can see this happen all around us, younger ones imitating parents, older brothers and sisters, and older friends. It's very flattering. The problem is that children imitate not just healthy behavior and attitudes, but also sometimes the not-so-healthy. We get very uncomfortable when we look at a younger person misbehaving and see ourselves in that person. Suddenly, we aren't flattered any more. When we see things we don't like in others, we must first look at ourselves to see if we need changing. This is all we can do--change ourselves. Others may follow our example or they may not, but we can be sure that, when we watch our own behavior, most of what we see of ourselves in others will be flattering. What change can I make in myself to set a good example today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. If we were logical, the future would be bleak indeed. But we are more than logical. We are human beings, and we have faith, and we have hope, and we can work. --Jacques Cousteau What is faith? It is believing in possibilities. It is the ability to carry on with our plans or to be true to our work even though we feel discouraged or tired. It is staying active in relationships even when we receive little in return or when our friends aren't able to respond. If there were no doubt, there would be no need for faith. Faith is temporarily putting our doubts on the shelf and working toward our goals. Faith is trusting that help and support will be there for us even though they're not in view. It is looking at a map and choosing a new destination, getting on the road to go there, and trusting the marks on the map symbolize a real place that we will find. I will leave room for my doubts and discouragement, but I will not indulge them. I will choose to go with hope. I will give my energy to the better possibilities. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Those who do not know how to weep with their whole heart don't know how to laugh either. --Golda Meir We all know people who live on the fringes of life. They seem uninvolved with the activity in their midst, as though a pane of glass separated them from us. And there are times when we join the persons standing alone away from the vibrancy of life. Fears keep people apart, particularly the fear of letting go of the vulnerable self and joining in the feelings of the moment. To fully reap the benefits of life, we have to risk full exposure to one another and to the experience of the moment. Full involvement in the ebb and flow of life will bring the weeping that accompanies both the pain and the joy of life. It will also bring the fruits of laughter. Both laughter and weeping cleanse us. They bring closure to an experience. They make possible our letting go. And we must let go of pain, as well as joy, to ready ourselves for the next blessing life offers us. When we keep ourselves apart, when we hold off the tears or the laughter, we cheat ourselves of the richness of life. We have to go through an experience fully in order to learn all it can teach us and then be free of it. Past experiences never let me go until I fully grieve those that need to be grieved or laugh over those that deserve the light touch. The present is distorted when the past shadows it. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Acceptance Surrender to the moment. Ride it out and through, for all its worth. Throw yourself into it. Stop resisting. So much of our anguish is created when we are in resistance. So much relief, release, and change are possible when we accept, simply accept. We waste our time, expend our energy, and make things harder by resisting, repressing, and denying. Repressing our thoughts will not make them disappear. Repressing a thought already formed will not make us a better person. Think it. Let it come into reality. Then release it. A thought is not forever. If we don't like it, we can think another one or change it. But to do that, we must accept and release the first thought. Resistance and repression will not change a thing. They will put us at war with our thoughts. We make life harder by resisting and repressing our feelings. No matter how dark, how uncomfortable, how unjustified, how surprising, how inappropriate we might deem our feelings, resisting and repressing them will not free us from them. Doing that will make them worse. They will swirl inside us, torment us, make us sick, and make our body ache, compel us to do compulsive things, keep us awake, or put us to sleep. In the final analysis, all that were really called on to do is accept our feelings by feeling them, and saying, Yes, this is what I feel. Feelings are for the present moment. The more quickly we can accept a feeling, the more quickly we will move on to the next. Resisting or repressing thoughts and feelings does not change us or turn us into the person we want to be or think we should be. It puts us in resistance to reality. It makes us repressed. Eventually, it makes us depressed. Resisting events or circumstances in our life does not change things, no matter how undesirable the events or circumstances may be. Acceptance turns us into the person we are and want to be. Acceptance empowers the events and circumstances to turn around for the better. What do we do if were in resistance, in a tug of war with some reality in our life? Accepting our resistance can help us get through that too. Acceptance does not mean were giving our approval. It does not mean surrendering to the will and plans of another. It does not mean commitment. It is not forever. It is for the present moment. Acceptance does not make things harder; it makes things easier. Acceptance does not mean we accept abuse or mistreatment; it does not mean we forego boundaries, our hopes, dreams, desires, wants, or ourselves. It means we accept what is, so we know what to do to take care of ourselves and what boundaries we need to set. It means we accept what is and who we are at the moment, so we are free to change and grow. Acceptance and surrender move us forward on this journey. Force does not work. Acceptance and surrender - two concepts that hurt the most before we do them. Today, I will practice accepting my present circumstances and myself. I will begin to watch and trust the magic that acceptance can bring into my life and recovery. I am open to positive changes in my life today. --Ruth Fishel ****************************************** Journey To The Heart Value Your Connection to Creativity Creativity is a force– a living, real force. It’s the power of love, the power of life, a gift of the Divine. You’re connected to that force. Open up to your creative powers– in work, in play, in love. Make creations that are beautiful to look at. Make creations you like to see, creations that are pleasing to you. Creativity comes in many forms– cooking, decorating, speaking, drawing, writing, or building a castle in sand at the beach. How you choose to create is up to you. “I used to love taking pictures when I was a child,” one man said. “Then one day, in a rage, my father smashed my camera to the floor. He told me taking pictures was nonsense. It was twenty years before I let myself take a picture again. Now, I can’t stop.” Who told you you weren’t creative? Stand tall, speak up, and tell them they’re wrong. Own your creative powers. Allow your creativity to heal and flourish. Value your connections to creativity. Value the way you choose to express your creative power. It’s your expression of love. ****************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Pray and manifest your power The Sufis have a saying: Praise Allah, and tie your camel to a post. This brings together both parts of practice: pray, yes, but also make sure that you do what is necessary in the world. –Jack Kornfield, Seeking the Heart of Wisdom It’s easy to play the martyr. We spend our lives in struggle and turmoil longing for the sweet by-and-by when everything will be fine. Today is the sweet by-and-by. Yes, right now. It’s here. If we’re to have good in our lives, it’s up to us to seek it out. Here are two things the Bible teaches about faith. One, it says that faith is like a mustard seed. The tiniest bit of it can grow tall and in its own time will sprout. The other thing the Bible says is that faith without works is dead. If you’re not doing something, then you’re not keeping your faith alive. Pray. Turn it over to God. But do something, too. Stop waiting for someone to come along and rescue you. Learn to rescue yourself. God, help me take guided actions today to make my life a better place. ***************************************** In God’s Care This instant is the only time there is. ~~Gerald Jampolsky How many precious moments of sunshine, birds’ song, or friends’ laughter we never lay claim to because we’re lost in our thoughts about yesterday or tomorrow. God has given us these moments we’re experiencing right now, and in each one is a gift – intended for each of us. The smile we get from a loved one or a stranger is precious and worthy of cherishing; but to cherish it, we must notice it When our mind is not quietly and intently immersed in the present, we fail to garner the strength God is offering us every moment. Our higher Power is evident wherever we look, but we must see; our Higher Power is evident in every voice, but we must hear. Our Higher Power is evident within, but we must be quiet and know. I will quiet my mind so I can see and hear and know that God is present, now. ****************************************** Wanting to Join Dumbing Ourselves Down by Madisyn Taylor Playing it small in order to fit in with a group of people robs the essence of your soul level self. The ability to go into any social situation and sense the level of consciousness in that situation is a gift. It enables us to move considerately in a world that holds people of all levels of awareness. However, there is a difference between shifting our energy to accommodate people and dumbing ourselves down to a regrettable degree. Sometimes, when we get into a particular social situation, we may feel pressure to play it small in order to fit in. Perhaps everyone is drinking or smoking excessively, engaging in gossipy small talk, or complaining bitterly about politics. It is one thing to notice this and modify our expectations and another thing entirely to join in. When we notice where people are coming from and acknowledge to ourselves that their energy is not in alignment with ours, we have several choices as to how to proceed. One viable option is to quietly endure the situation, keeping to ourselves until it is time to leave. In this way, we take care of our own consciousness and protect our growth process. Another option is to interact in a way that honors and pays respect to the people in the group, while gently attempting to shift the level of consciousness with our input. In order to do this, we must maintain our own vibration, which means that joining in by dumbing down is not an option. When we choose to dumb ourselves down to fit in, we not only sell ourselves short but we also lose a possible opportunity to influence the situation for the good of all concerned. Our desire to join in may come from our natural yearning to feel connected to the people around us. There is no shame in this, but being able to stand on our own, separate from the crowd, is a powerful milestone on any spiritual path. It can be difficult in the moment, but when we arrive on the other side, our integrity intact, we may find ourselves feeling positively smart. Published with permission from Daily OM ****************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day In almost every instance, the returned slipper says, “I stopped going to meetings,” or “I got fed up with the same old stories and the same old faces,” or “My outside commitments were such that I had to cut down on meetings,” or “I felt I’d received the optimum benefits from meetings, so I sought further help from more meaningful activities.” In short, they simply stopped going to meetings. A saying I’ve heard in The Program hits the nail on the head: “Them which stops going to meetings are not present at meetings to hear about what happen to them what stops going to meetings.” Am I going to enough meetings for me? Today I Pray God keep me on the track of The Program. May I never be too tired, too busy, too complacent, too bored to go to meetings. Almost always those complaints are reversed at a meeting if I will just get myself there. My weariness dissipates in serenity. My busyness is reduced to its rightful proportion. My complacency gives way to vigilance again. And how can I be bored in a place where there is so much fellowship and joy? Today I Will Remember Attend the meetings. ****************************************** One More Day Excessive fear is always powerless. – Aeschylus Something may be interfering with our sleep. Eyes wide, we lie in bed night after night. We move through the days like robots, just getting by. Our lack of sleep may stem from worries and problems that we can’t face. Our confrontation with illness may have suddenly made us see how powerless we are over some parts of our lives. Where once we had felt that everything had an acceptable answer, we now have to live with an answer we don’t like and we can’t change. We may pull that original sense of helplessness into other areas of our lives. Gradually, we understand that life has always been unpredictable; we just refused to see it until we were forced to. We learn to accept the things we can’t change and work toward changing the things we can. We deal wit our problems. Our anxiety subsides. We’re able to rest. Today, I’ll accept unchangeable answers. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~ The Future ~ When I look into the future, it's so bright it burns my eyes. Oprah Winfrey I receive the gift of abstinence one day at a time. I am relieved from the obsession to eat one day at a time. With the help of my Higher Power, I can live life on life's terms... one day at a time. As my recovery builds and builds, I start to imagine all the possibilities for my life. Things I never had the confidence or emotional stability to pursue are options for me. Now that I am free from the despair and self-destruction of overeating, there is space to actualize new adventures. But before I become overwhelmed or grandiose in my thinking, the Program gently reminds me that it is STILL just one day a time. One Day at a Time . . . I will work my program so that I have a future. ~ Christine S. ~ ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote Cling to the thought that in God's hands, the dark past is the greatest possession you have - the key to life and happiness for others. With it you can avert death and misery for them. - Pg. 124 - The Family Afterward Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Compulsion is a word you will hear a lot now that you have made the decision to begin recovery. You may often feel compelled to drink or use drugs again even when you don't want to. Compulsion is a symptom of our disease and we use all the new tools of our program to counteract compulsions. Please help me understand that compulsion is a symptom of my disease and as such need not be acted upon. I offer my compulsive behavior to God, as I understand God. Blessings I can lose my blessings. If I don't appreciate them, they can disappear. If I feel overly entitled, if I take what is mine for granted, if I behave as if it is simply owed me and I don't need to notice or appreciate them, I am literally telling them to shrink. There is a wisdom, even a divine sort of self centerdness to gratitude, because what I focus on with appreciation has a way of expanding in my life. If I erase my blessings, I don't feed them with the grace of gratitude. If I give thanks for them, I show the creative force that brings forth all good things, that I am awake enough to appreciate what has been so generously given. I know enough to say thank you - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote When things go wrong, they are not particularly anyone's fault. You can't expect every meeting to be perfect and your sponsor to have every answer. You know you can't control or fix everything that goes wrong and neither can 'they.' When things go wrong, I don't let them get too far. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book To the mind that is still, the world surrenders. Time for Joy - Book - Quote I am open to positive changes in my life today. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote This deal is as simple as A.B.C. - Accept, Begin and Continue. It doesn't take a lawyer or some intellectual gorilla to decipher that. And you can do it downtown or uptown or anywhere else. It doesn't make any difference. And if you'll hold on to the God of your understanding, the truth about yourself - namely that you cannot take one drink - and hold on to your AA friends, you'll hold on to total abstinence. And that's the name of this game. - John C. |
April 4
Daily Reflections CRYING FOR THE MOON "This very real feeling of inferiority is magnified by his childish sensitivity and it is this state of affairs which generates in him that insatiable, abnormal craving for self-approval and success in the eyes of the world. Still a child, he cries for the moon. And the moon, it seems, won't have him!" LANGUAGE OF THE HEART, p. 102 While drinking I seemed to vacillate between feeling totally invisible and believing I was the center of the universe. Searching for that elusive balance between the two has become a major part of my recovery. The moon I constantly cried for is, in sobriety, rarely full; it shows me instead its many other phases, and there are lessons in them all. True learning has often followed an eclipse, a time of darkness, but with each cycle of my recovery, the light grows stronger and my vision is clearer. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day When I came into A.A., I found men and women who had been through the same things I had been through. But now they were thinking more about how they could help others than they were about themselves. They were a lot more unselfish than I ever was. By coming to meetings and associating with them, I began to think a little less about myself and a little more about other people. I also learned that I didn't have to depend on myself alone to get out of the mess I was in. I could get a greater strength than my own. Am I now depending less on myself and more on God? Meditation For The Day You cannot help others unless you understand the person you are trying to help. To understand the problems and temptations of others, you must have been through them yourself. You must do all you can to understand others. You must study their backgrounds, their likes and dislikes, their reactions and their prejudices. When you see their weaknesses, do not confront the person with them. Share your own weaknesses, sins, and temptations and let other people find their own convictions. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may serve as a channel for God's power to come into the lives of others. I pray that I may try to understand them. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It ". . .In All Our Affairs, p. 94 "The chief purpose of A.A. is sobriety. We all realize that without sobriety we have nothing. "However, it is possible to expand this simple aim into a great deal of nonsense, so far as the individual member is concerned. Sometimes we hear him say, in effect, "Sobriety is my sole responsibility. After all, I'm a pretty fine chap, except for my drinking. Give me sobriety, and I've got it made!' "As long as our friend clings to this comfortable alibi, he will make so little progress with his real life problems and responsibilities that he stands in a fair way to get drunk again. This is why A.A.'s Twelfth Steps urges that 'we practice these principles in all our affairs.' We are not living just to be sober; we are living to learn, to serve, and to love. Letter, 1966 ************************************************** ********* Walk in Dry Places You are not alone Fellowship If you feel isolated and lonely, tape the letters ~~ YANA~~ to the dash in your car. "You Are Never Alone" can help bring a surge of confidence when you most need it. We are not alone because we have thousands of friends who have shared our experience and who understand our feelings. We also are not alone because we have a Higher Power who presides over the affairs of all humankind. We can never be separated from this Power except in our own minds. We must remember that we will always need other people. Virtually everything that benefits us is supplied by the skills and knowledge of others.We can believe that we are completely independent, but the truth is that no person survives completely alone. The typical problem for many of us is in failing to seek help from others. If extreme loneliness is closing in on us, the best prescription is a meeting and the company of other members. I'll not be too proud to ask for help today or to explain to others that I need them and appreciate them. I should also freely admit that help from others led me to sobriety---and helps maintain it today. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Pray without resentment in your heart. ---The Little Red Book Resentment is anger that we don't want to turn over to our Higher Power. Sometimes we want to keep our anger. Maybe we want to "get even." it's hard to be spiritual and full of anger at the same time. When we hold on to anger, it turns into self-will. We get angry from time to time. This is normal. But we now have a program to help us let go of anger. We also know that stored-up anger can drive us back to alcohol and other drugs. Instead of trying to "get even," let's work at keeping anger out of our hearts. Prayer for the Day: I pray without anger in my heart. Higher Power, I give You my anger. Have me work for justice, instead of acting like a judge. Action For the Day: I'll list any resentments I now have. I'll talk about them at my next meeting. This is the best way to turn resentments over to my Higher Power. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning All we are asked to bear we can bear. That is a law of the spiritual life. The only hindrance to the working of this law, as of all benign laws, is fear. --Elizabeth Goudge There is no problem too difficult to handle with all the help available to us. Let's not be overwhelmed. The program tells us to "Let go and let God," to turn it over. And that's where the solution lies. Our challenges, the stumbling blocks in our way, beckon us toward the spiritual working-out of the problem which moves us closer toward being the women we are meant to be. Our fear comes from not trusting in the power greater than ourselves to provide the direction we need, to make known the solution. Every day we will have challenges. We have lessons to learn which mean growing pains. If we could but remember that our challenges are gifts to grow on and that within every problem lies the solution. I will not be given more than I and my higher power can handle today, or any day. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition WE AGNOSTICS When we became alcoholics, crushed by a self-imposed crises we could not postpone or evade, we had to fearlessly face the proposition that either God is everything or else He is nothing. God either is or He isn’t. What was our choice to be? Arrived at this point, we were squarely confronted with the question of faith. We couldn’t duck the issue. Some of us had already walked far over the Bridge of Reason toward the desired shore of faith. The outlines and the promise of the New Land had brought lustre to tired eyes and fresh courage to flagging spirits. Friendly hands had stretched out in welcome. We were grateful that Reason had brought us so far. But somehow, we couldn’t quite step ashore. Perhaps we had been leaning too heavily on reason that last mile and we did not like to lose our support. p. 53 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories He Sold Himself Short Where derision, contempt, and pity were once shown me, I now enjoy the respect of many people. Where once I had casual acquaintances, all of whom were fair-weathered friends, I now have a host of friends who accept me for what I am. And over my A.A. years I have made many real, honest, sincere friendships that I shall always cherish. p. 267 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Tradition Twelve - "Anonymity is the spiritual foundation of all our traditions, ever reminding us to place principles before personalities." This phenomenon of contrast really set us thinking. Squarely before us was the question "How anonymous should an A.A. member be?" Our growth made it plain that we couldn't be a secret society, but it was equally plain that we couldn't be a vaudeville circuit, either. The charting of a safe path between these extremes took a long time. p. 185 ************************************************** ********* "In forgiving ourselves, we make the journey from guilt for what we have done (or not done) to celebration of what we have become." --Joan Borysenko Pitying yourself will get you nowhere. Things aren't always going to go the way you want them to, but still you must set the rules regarding how you respond to them. There is incredible beauty, in the gentle and quiet spirit, precious in God's direction. --SweetyZee "He who cannot rest, cannot work; He who cannot let go, cannot hold on; He who cannot find footing, cannot go forward." --Harry Emerson Fosdick "Remember not only to say the right thing in the right place, but far more difficult still, to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment." --Benjamin Franklin If there is anything we wish to change in the child, we should first examine it and see whether it is not something that could be better changed in ourselves. --Carl Jung Voices we prefer to ignore may speak words we need to hear. --Don Deal ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation BEAUTY "Beauty is not caused. It is." --Emily Dickinson So many people think that beauty is what you do to yourself; what you wear, makeup, clothes, hairstyles or expensive jewelry. Again it is so easy to get caught up in "things". Reality is not about what we wear but who we are. The beauty that God has created comes from within. The twinkle in the eyes that says "hello". The hug that says "I love you". The gentle embrace and smile that says "I forgive you". The tear that cries "I understand". When God said to the world, "It is good", Beauty was born. Drugs and crazy relationships only get in the way of us being what we were intended to be: beautiful for God. Today I seek to put God's beauty in my actions, words and attitudes. ************************************************** ********* "Be strong, and let your heart take courage, all you who wait for the Lord." Psalm 31:24 For the Lord will be your confidence and will keep your foot from being snared. Proverbs 3:26 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Today is an opportunity to love, to work and to play. Lord, may I recognize the opportunities that come today and participate in them as much as I can. In life it is those that persevere that will succeed. Lord, every day is a fresh beginning. With You, I will come closer to my goals each day if only I don't give up and quit. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Guarding Our Recovery "Remember that we... are ultimately responsible for our recovery and our decisions." Basic Text p. 99 Most of us will face choices that challenge our recovery. If we find ourselves in extreme physical pain, for example, we will have to decide whether or not we will take medication. We will have to be very honest with ourselves about the severity of our pain, honest with our doctor about our addiction and our recovery, and honest with our sponsor In the end, however, the decision is ours, for we are the ones who must live with the consequences. Another common challenge is the choice of attending a party where alcohol will be served. Again, we should consider our own spiritual state. If someone who supports our recovery can attend the event with us, so much the better. However, if we don't feel up to such a challenge, we should probably decline the invitation. Today, we know that preserving our recovery is more important than saving face. All such decisions are tough ones, requiring not only our careful consideration but the guidance of our sponsor and complete surrender to a Higher Power Using all of these resources, we make the best decision we can. Ultimately, however, the decision is ours. Today, we are responsible for our own recovery. Just for today: When faced with a decision that may challenge my recovery I will consult all the resources at my disposal before I make my choice. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. One day at a time--this is enough. Do not look back and grieve over the past, for it is gone. --Ida Scott Taylor It's not always easy to understand that the day stretching before us is all that counts. Daydreaming about the party last week, or getting upset all over again about a fight we had yesterday with a friend doesn't help us right now. When our minds are on the past, we miss out on the conversation or the activity that is going on around us. Every moment of the day is special, and guaranteed to help us grow and understand life. All of us have been taught to pay attention in school, or to pay attention when others talk to us. But we should also pay attention to the birds, the sky, even the grass. And we can learn a lot by paying attention to the conversations going on around us, and to the small voice inside us that helps us know right from wrong. What's going on today is enough to pay attention to. Am I ready to pay attention to what is around me today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. What is obvious to me is that we did not create ourselves... life is something inside of you. You did not create it. Once you understand that, .you are in a spiritual realm. --Virginia Satir We do not belong to ourselves, but to the universe. No man planned to come into existence; he just happened to find himself here. We are the expressions of a life force whose beginnings are in the forgotten past. What does this mean on a practical level for how we will live today? For one thing, maybe we don't need to take ourselves so seriously. And we certainly are not to judge our existence. We have a right to be here, just as everyone does. We can live this day fully and not hold ourselves back. We may work hard, play, and enjoy it. We need not rein in or attempt to control this force which so far exceeds our individual powers. Rather, today we can learn to flow with the current. Today, may I remember my Higher Power is within every cell of my being, whether I notice it or not. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. All we are asked to bear we can bear. That is a law of the spiritual life. The only hindrance to the working of this law, as of all benign laws, is fear. --Elizabeth Goudge There is no problem too difficult to handle with all the help available to us. Let's not be overwhelmed. The program tells us to "Let go and let God," to turn it over. And that's where the solution lies. Our challenges, the stumbling blocks in our way, beckon us toward the spiritual working-out of the problem which moves us closer toward being the women we are meant to be. Our fear comes from not trusting in the power greater than ourselves to provide the direction we need, to make known the solution. Every day we will have challenges. We have lessons to learn which mean growing pains. If we could but remember that our challenges are gifts to grow on and that within every problem lies the solution. I will not be given more than I and my higher power can handle today, or any day. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Negotiating Conflicts Recovery is about more than walking away. Sometimes it means learning to stay and deal. Its about building and maintaining relationships that work. --Beyond Codependency Problems and conflicts are part of life and relationships - with friends, family, loved ones, and at work problem solving and conflict negotiation are skills we can acquire and improve with time. Not being willing to tackle and solve problems in relationships leads to unresolved feelings of anger and victimization, terminated relationships, unresolved problems, and power plays that intensify the problem and waste time and energy. Not being willing to face and solve problems means we may run into that problem again. Some problems with people cannot be worked out in mutually satisfactory ways. Sometimes the problem is a boundary issue we have, and there is not room to negotiate. In that case, we need to clearly understand what we want and need and what our bottom line is. Some problems with people, though, can be worked out. worked through, and satisfactorily negotiated. Often, there are workable options for solving problems that we will not even see until we become open to the concept of working through problems in relationships, rather than running from the problems. To negotiate problems, we must be willing to identify the problem, let go of blame and shame, and focus on possible creative solutions. To successfully negotiate and solve problems in relationships, we must have a sense of our bottom line and our boundary issues, so we don't waste time trying to negotiate non-negotiable issues. We need to learn to identify what both people really want and need and the different possibilities for working that out. We can learn to be flexible without being too flexible. Committed, intimate relationships mean two people are learning to work together through their problems and conflicts in ways that work in both peoples best interest. Today, I will be open to negotiating conflicts I have with people. I will strive for balance without being too submissive or too demanding. I will strive for appropriate flexibility in my problem solving efforts. Today I am hanging in no matter what. Even when my conscious mind wants to give up, I will reach for that healthy loving part deep within me and with the help of prayer and meditation and the good people in my life, I will find a rainbow. --Ruth Fishel ****************************************** Journey To The Heart Wait for Timely Action Watch the surfer as he works his way out to sea. See him watching the waves, waiting for the right movement, the right timing, the right swell. Sometimes the wave comes quickly. Sometimes he has to tread water patiently for a long time, waiting and watching before he can ride the wave. Learn to ride the waves of energy in your life. Learn to wait for the right time to take action. Learn to wait until your senses, your emotions, your body, and the universe give you the signal you need. Yes, you have a list of things you want to do. But as soon as you have made that list, visualized what you want, you’ve already begun a powerful force. You’ve already begun to engage the universe in helping bring you want you want. There are moments that are more perfect than others to initiate action, to make that phone call, to finish that task. Untimely action will not get the job done any sooner. It will simply waste your energy and send you back to sea, waiting for the right wave. Focus on your goal, muster all your forces, and head out to sea. Then wait patiently for the right time, for the right energy, for the right wave. The right wave will come. When it does, grab your board, jump on, and ride it for all its worth. ****************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Ask for guidance Sometimes things seem like good ideas and aren’t, really. –Piglet Ask for guidance first. Self-will is a tricky thing. So are impulse behaviors. We’ve heard of impulse buying– making a purchase quickly and without thought, based on monetary impulse. It’s easy to get caught up living our lives that way,too. So often, we run off in the heat of the moment. Spontaneity is good. Saying yes to life is good,too. But impulse living can get us into trouble. We can overreact to a problem, then sit in a heap of regrets. Sometimes, the next step presents itself clearly, in a flash of inspiration. Sometimes, we’re meant to go forward and not let our fears and negative thoughts hold us back. Sometimes, we’re acting on impulse and may end up sabotaging ourselves. Ask for guidance first. It takes only a second to check the map and see if the turn we’re thinking of making is where we really want go. God, show me what your will is for me. Show me if the decision I’m about to make is in my best interest or if there is a better path for me to explore. ****************************************** In God’s Care The hand that gives gathers. ~~English proverb Maybe we grew up believing somehow that to give is to lose. We were taught to believe, or came to the conclusion on our own, that when we give away something, we have to do without it; to give meant to experience loss. Now, our spiritual friends show us a love that demands nothing in return, and we have a different attitude. We discover that when we give in a spirit of generosity, we lose nothing at all. When we share a material possession we feel rich. The opposite is true, too, of course. When we withhold love, we feel unloved, and when we don’t share what we have, we feel the loss of something. There is a spiritual maxim at work here. We can give of ourselves and have everything, or we can withhold ourselves and experience spiritual poverty. I give of what I have. It is the way to be truly happy. ****************************************** Physical Bodies on Earth Spiritual Being--Physical Experience by Madisyn Taylor While we are incarnated in a body on this earth, we must remember that we still are a spiritual being at our core. We are on this earth, in our physical bodies, because our souls have things to learn that we could not learn in any other way. It is through our physical body and the physical world that we can experience life. Purely spiritual beings are just that – they are in a state of being rather than doing – in a place that is beyond the limitations of time and space. But when we incarnate on the physical plane, we are automatically subject to the laws of physics and the world of dualities. In this place, we know what happiness is because we have experienced sadness, and we understand the value and power of light because we have known darkness. Knowing this, we have the opportunity to let ourselves be spiritual beings having a physical experience. There is no pain in the spiritual realm, because we know we are one with the limitless source of the universe. But here, in the material realm, our sense of limitation and separation allows us to feel our emotions and to learn about love, forgiveness, and compassion. We go from a spiritual state of oneness to learning how to be in relationship with people who are different and distinct individuals. We learn to understand ourselves through our relationships with the world around us—its seasons and landscapes, challenges and opportunities. And through our journey to find our place among so many others, we begin to recognize our own glimmer of light in a constellation of stars. Once we remember that we are spiritual beings, we can revel in the experience of being human while knowing we are all connected. We can live from the place of oneness while truly appreciating the beauty of diversity, the bittersweet feel of love and loss, and the elation of triumph over challenges and adversity. It is through these opposites that we experience life itself, and we can ride through the dark times with the understanding that it will help us to appreciate the light of life and love and spirit more fully. We are here now because we made the choice to experience an earth life, so now we can choose to enjoy the journey as completely as possible. Published with permission from Daily OM ****************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day Another common denominator among those who slip is failure to use the tools of The Program — the Twelve Steps. The comments heard most often are, “i never got past the First Step,’ “I worked The Steps too slow,” or “too fast” or “too soon.” What it boils down to, is that these considered the Steps, but didn’t conscientiously and sincerely apply the Steps to their lives. Am I learning how to protect myself and help others? Today I Pray May I be a doer of the Steps and not a hearer only. May I see some of the common mid-Steps which lead to a fall: Being too proud to admit Step One; Being too tied to everyday earth to feel the presence of a Higher Power; Being over-whelmed by the thought of preparing Step Four, a complete moral inventory; Being too reticent to share that inventory. Please, God, guide me as I work the Twelve Steps. Today I Will Remember To watch my Steps. ****************************************** One More Day The mind leaps, and leaps perhaps with a sort of elation. – Joseph Wood Krutch A chronic medical problem can be incorporated into our total picture of life. If we allow problems, medical or otherwise, to overwhelm and exclude everything else, we are defeated before we begin. We don’t have to be defeatist. Everyday dawns fresh with opportunities to change, to find happiness, and to live our lives well. By searching deeply within, we can redefine our faith in ourselves and in our Higher Power. A joy, and elation, can be ours when we allow ourselves to express our natural human curiosity through growth, learning, and a willingness to try new things. We can hold our heads up high and be proud. Regardless of my physical condition, I have dignity and worth. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~ Commitment ~ Shallow men believe in luck ~ Strong men believe in cause and effect. Ralph Waldo Emerson Abstinence did not happen for me until I made a commitment to it. I realized that I would have abstinence until something was a bit too uncomfortable for me to face or feel. Then I would have a slip. So it became a game for me. Was this event or circumstance enough to justify another slip? Sure, why not? That's the nature of the disease. Everything and anything was an excuse to eat. It wasn't until I made a commitment to abstinence that I was forced to find my solutions in the Twelve Steps and really let go of my addiction. I'm grateful to my Higher Power that I hit the bottom I did. By accepting the truth about myself and my food addiction, I am now free to live in the solution. One Day at a Time . . . I will renew my commitment by receiving the gift of abstinence and practicing my program to the best of my ability. ~ Christine S. ~ ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote It is easy to let up on the spiritual program of action and rest on our laurels. We are headed for trouble if we do, for alcohol is a subtle foe. We are not cured of alcoholism. What we really have is a daily reprieve contingent on the maintenance of our spiritual condition. - Pg. 85 - Into Action Hour To Hour - Book - Quote When we describe recovery as 'accepting a fate worse than death,' we don't understand the true nature of acceptance. This is called the 'sigh and die' syndrome. Rather than dwell on what can't be changed, we learn to do what is right at this moment, in this hour. I don't want to be a part of the 'sigh and die' syndrome. Right this moment, I will pick up another book on recovery and read one page, any page, and that will break the spell. Inner Peace There is peace within me that I can draw on each and every day. I will remind myself to take a few moments today, to center myself. I will breathe. I will sit. And when I go about my day I will carry that lovely feeling of inner peace around with me. There is nothing in my day that is more important than my serenity. Today, I will pay attention to the myriad of ways in which I am thrown off balance. When I feel myself losing my serenity, I'll take a moment to center myself, to breathe, to connect with that part of me that is eternal and unchanging. I'll remind myself that when I can calm my body, mind and spirit, I interact differently with the people, places and things of my day. I am here. My spirit is here. My serenity is at my fingertips. I am in charge of my deeper experience of living. I connect with my divine self and the diving energy that is ever present. I give myself the gift of inner peace. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote The diversity of people seeking recovery is extraordinary. Whether an old salty dog, young gang member, grandparent, or teen with attitude, we remember: as cancer is no respecter of victims, neither is addiction. Same disease, same recovery. 'We all came on different ships, but we're all on the same boat now.' ~Martin Luther King "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Talk to your sponsor first. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I am hanging in no matter what. Even when my conscious mind wants to give up, I will reach for that healthy loving part deep within me and with the help of prayer and meditation and the good people in my life, I will find a rainbow. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote We can't discover new worlds until we have the courage to let go of the shore. - Anon. |
April 5
Daily Reflections TRUE BROTHERHOOD We have not once sought to be one in a family, to be a friend among friends, to be a worker among workers, to be a useful member of society. Always we tried to struggle to the top of the heap, or to hide underneath it. This self-centered behavior blocked a partnership relation with any one of those about us. Of true brotherhood we had small comprehension. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 53 This message contained in Step Four was the first one I heard loud and clear; I hadn't seen myself in print before! Prior to my coming into A.A., I knew of no place that could teach me how to become a person among persons. From my very first meeting, I saw people doing just that and I wanted what they had. One of the reasons that I'm a happy, sober alcoholic today is that I'm learning this most important lesson. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day People often ask what makes the A.A. program work. One of the answers is that A.A. works because it gets people away from themselves as the center of the universe. And it teaches them to rely more on the fellowship of others and on strength from God. Forgetting ourselves in fellowship, prayer, and working with others is what makes the A.A. program work. Are these things keeping me sober? Meditation For The Day God is the great interpreter of one human personality to another. Even personalities who are the nearest together have much in their natures that remains a seated book to each other. And only as God enters and controls their lives are the mysteries of each revealed to the other. Each personality is so different. God alone understands perfectly the language of each and can interpret between the two. Here we find the miracles of change and the true interpretation of life. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may be in the right relationship to God. I pray that God will interpret to me the personalities of other people, so that I can understand them and help them. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Spiritual Kindergarten, p. 95 "We are only operating a spiritual kindergarten in which people are enabled to get over drinking and find the grace to go on living to better effect. Each man's theology has to be his own quest, his own affair." << << << >> >> >> When the Big Book was being planned, some members thought that it ought to be Christian in the doctrinal sense. Others had no objection to the use of the word "God", but wanted to avoid doctrinal issues. Spirituality, yes. Religion, no. Still others wanted a psychological book, to lure the alcoholic in. Once in, he could take God or leave Him alone as he wished. To the rest of us this was shocking, but happily we listened. Our group conscience was at work to construct the most acceptable and effective book possible. Every voice was playing its appointed part. Our atheists and agnostics widened our gateway so that all who suffer might pass through, regardless of their belief or lack of belief. 1. Letter, 1954 2. A.A. Comes Of Age, pp. 162, 163, 167 ************************************************** ********* Walk in Dry Places Letting Go of Resentment___ Releasing the Past How can we really put an end to festering resentments toward other people? "Pray for these people," the Old-timers said. "Go out of your way to do something good for them." This is a big order for most of us, but we are working for a big reward: Sobriety, peace of mind, and personal progress. When we pray for others in this manner, we're practicing the noble art of forgiveness. How do we know when it's staring to work? Lewis B. Smedes, a master teacher of forgiveness, offers this thought: "You will know that forgiveness has begun when you recall those who hurt you and feel the power to wish them well." Forgiveness also is supposed to include forgetting the wrong. What we really forget is the hurt connected with it. When anything that once evoked pain comes to mind, we're growing spiritually if it no longer has the power to hurt us. We then discover that we had been letting go our resentments hurt us again and again. We also learn that one effort to forgive is not nearly enough. Forgiveness takes the same amount of practice and emotional power we put into carrying the resentment! Today will bring enough problems. I don't have either the time or the energy to play the old tapes that cause me pain. I'll practice praying for those who hurt me, and I'll take it for granted that my HIgher Power is removing my resentments. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Go outside, to the fields, enjoy nature and the sunshine, go out and try to recapture happiness in yourself and in God.---Anne Frank Many of us look at the joy and beauty of the program with caution. It was different from our addictive joy. Was it to be trusted? When we started working the Steps, we found inner joy and beauty. As we let go and gave in to the program, we found more happiness. We found joy in ourselves, our friends, our Higher Power, and those around us. Our self-pity changed to self-respect. We were truly out in the sunshine. We were no longer lost in misery. We know how to walk through misery to find joy. Prayer for the Day: May I become better friends with myself. Higher Power, let me see the world through Your innocent, yet wise and loving eyes Action for the Day: Today I'll work to make my life and the lives of others more joyful. I'll greet myself and others with much joy. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning I came to the conclusion then that "continual mindfulness". . . must mean, not a sergeant-major-like drilling of thoughts, but a continual readiness to look and readiness to accept whatever came. --Joanna Field Resistance to the events, the situations, the many people who come into our lives blocks the growth we are offered every day. Every moment of every day is offering us a gift: the gift of awareness of other persons, awareness of our natural surroundings, awareness of our own personal impact on creation. And in awareness comes our growth as women. Living in the now, being present in the moment, guarantees us the protection of God. And in the stretches of time when we anxiously anticipate the events of the future, we cheat ourselves of the security God offers us right now. We are always being taken care of, right here, right now. Being mindful, this minute, of what's happening and only this, eases all anxieties, erases all fears. We only struggle when we have moved our sights from the present moment. Within the now lies all peace. The most important lesson I have to learn, the lesson that will eliminate all of my pain and struggle, is to receive fully that which is offered in each moment of my life. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition WE AGNOSTICS That was natural, but let us think a little more closely. Without knowing it, had we not been brought to where we stood by a certain kind of faith? For did we not believe in our own reasoning? did we not have confidence in our ability to think? What was that but a sort of faith? Yes, we had been faithful, abjectly faithful to the God of Reason. So, in one way or another, we discovered that faith had been involved all the time! pp. 53-54 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories He Sold Himself Short I'm rated as a modestly successful man. My stock of material goods isn't great. But I have a fortune in friendships, courage, self-assurance, and honest appraisal of my own abilities. Above all, I have gained the greatest thing accorded to any man, the love and understanding of a gracious God, who has lifted me from the alcoholic scrap help to a position of trust, where I have been able to reap the rich rewards that come from showing a little love for others and from serving them as I can. p. 267 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Tradition Twelve - "Anonymity is the spiritual foundation of all our traditions, ever reminding us to place principles before personalities." As a rule, the average newcomer wanted his family to know immediately what he was trying to do. He also wanted to tell others who had tried to help him--his doctor, his minister, and close friends. As he gained confidence, he felt it right to explain his new way of life to his employer and business associates. When opportunities to be helpful came along, he found he could talk easily about A.A. to almost anyone. These quiet disclosures helped him to lose his fear of the alcoholic stigma, and spread the news of A.A.'s existence in his community. Many a new man and woman came to A.A. because of such conversations. Though not in the strict letter of anonymity, such communications were well within its spirit. pp. 185-186 ************************************************** ********* You can complain because roses have thorns, or you can rejoice because thorns have roses. --Tom Wilson "Not to transmit an experience is to betray it." --Elie Wiesel A friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out. "The difficulties of life are intended to make us better, not bitter." --Anon. "None of us knows what the next change is going to be, what unexpected opportunity is just around the corner, waiting to change all the tenor of our lives." --Kathleen Norris The beauty of God is evident when we work together for God's glory. --Jacki Work ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation FAILURE "No man is a failure who is enjoying life." --William Feather Spirituality is fun. I enjoy my sobriety today and I do not take myself too seriously. For years I thought I was a failure and this "thought" manifested the behavior of a failure. I hid, sulked, was jealous, carried resentments and isolated myself from life - and then blamed the world. Today because I really understand and accept that I am a child of God, I know that I am not a failure and I have a glorious future in recovery. Today I have hope. Today I have confidence. Today I am able to accept and forgive. Today I am able to love my neighbor because I love myself. In my enjoyment of life may I reflect your love for the world. ************************************************** ********* "For He shall give His angels charge over you, to keep you in all your ways." Psalm 91:11 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. 1 John 1:9 We are from God; he who knows God listens to us; he who is not from God does not listen to us. By this we know the spirit of truth and the spirit of error. 1 John 4:6 For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith--and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God--not by works, so that no one can boast. For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in a advance for us to do. Ephesians 2:8-10 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration In a day when almost everything goes right, don't ruin it by focusing on the one thing that didn't. Lord, help me to allow the good in my life to prevail. To live with anger or resentment creates even more anger and resentment. Lord, increase my ability to forgive and free me from all that separates me from You so that I may be filled with Your peace. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Identification "Someone finally knew the crazy thoughts that I had and the crazy things I'd done." Basic Text p. 175 Addicts often feel terminally unique. We're sure that no one used drugs like we did or had to do the things that we did to get them. Feeling that no one really understands us can keep us from recovery for many years. But once we come to the rooms of Narcotics Anonymous, we begin to lose that feeling of being "the worst" or "the craziest." We listen as members share their experiences. We discover that others have walked the same twisted path that we've walked and still have been able to find recovery. We begin to believe that recovery is available to us, too. As we progress in our own recovery, sometimes our thinking is still insane. However, we find that when we share the hard time we may be having, others identify, sharing how they have dealt with such difficulties. No matter how troubled our thinking seems, we find hope when others relate to us, passing along the solutions they've found. We begin to believe that we can survive whatever we're going through to continue on in our recovery. The gift of Narcotics Anonymous is that we learn we are not alone. We can get dean and stay clean by sharing our experience, our strength, and even our crazy thinking with other members. When we do, we open ourselves to the solutions others have found to the challenges we face. Just for today: I am grateful that I can identify with others. Today, I will listen as they share their experience, and I'll share mine with them. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. I measure every Grief I meet With narrow, probing, Eyes-- I wonder if it weighs like Mine-- Or has an easier size. --Emily Dickinson How can we measure all the grief we feel, and how can we put up with it? Doesn't the Grief of Death weigh a ton or more? Doesn't it stretch out to a month, a year, or longer still? Is the Grief of Failure lighter than the Grief of Despair, but maybe longer? Isn't the Grief of Emptiness the heaviest of all? Whether we try to ignore or make light of it, our grief, like a ton of feathers or a ton of rocks, is all the same to us. This much is sure: if we lock our grief in, it will weigh more on us and lengthen out; if we open our hearts with weeping and words, others will help carry it away. What old sadness can I let go of by sharing it today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. When angry, count four; when very angry, swear. --Mark Twain Feelings of anger are a knotty problem for many men. Some of us as children were injured or so frightened by an angry adult that we have instinctively avoided anger ever since. Or we have been appalled by ourselves when we lost control of our anger. Still, we are taught that it is masculine to be aggressive. Some of us have tried so hard to squelch our anger that we don't even know when we feel it. We treat anger like a rejected child once rejected we no longer have good discipline over it. So it comes out in hurtful jokes and sarcastic comments, or bursts out of us in scary and destructive ways. For some of us, overly controlled anger turns inward against ourselves. We get physically ill or depressed and self-hating. Every recovering man needs an honest relationship with his anger. We must acknowledge this feeling within us when it is there. It is healthy to express anger directly, honestly, and respectfully. Thanks to God for the richness of my emotional life. Today, I will notice my feelings of anger and accept them so I can learn to relate to them. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. I came to the conclusion then that "continual mindfulness". . . must mean, not a sergeant-major-like drilling of thoughts, but a continual readiness to look and readiness to accept whatever came. --Joanna Field Resistance to the events, the situations, the many people who come into our lives blocks the growth we are offered every day. Every moment of every day is offering us a gift: the gift of awareness of other persons, awareness of our natural surroundings, awareness of our own personal impact on creation. And in awareness comes our growth as women. Living in the now, being present in the moment, guarantees us the protection of God. And in the stretches of time when we anxiously anticipate the events of the future, we cheat ourselves of the security God offers us right now. We are always being taken care of, right here, right now. Being mindful, this minute, of what's happening and only this, eases all anxieties, erases all fears. We only struggle when we have moved our sights from the present moment. Within the now lies all peace. The most important lesson I have to learn, the lesson that will eliminate all of my pain and struggle, is to receive fully that which is offered in each moment of my life. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Detaching in Love Detachment is a key to recovery from codependency. It strengthens our healthy relationships - the ones that we want to grow and flourish. It benefits our difficult relationships - the ones that are teaching us to cope. It helps us! Detachment is not something we do once. Its a daily behavior in recovery. We learn it when were beginning our recovery from codependency and adult children issues. And we continue to practice it along the way as we grow and change, and as our relationships grow and change. We learn to let go of people we love, people we like, and those we don't particularly care for. We separate ourselves, and our process, from others and their process. We relinquish our tight hold and our need to control in our relationships. We take responsibility for ourselves; we allow others to do the same. We detach with the understanding that life is unfolding exactly as it needs to, for others and ourselves. The way life unfolds is good, even when it hurts. And ultimately, we can benefit from even the most difficult situations. We do this with the understanding that a Power greater than ourselves is in charge, and all is well. Today, I will apply the concept of detachment, to the best of my ability, in my relationships. If I cant let go completely, Ill try to hang on loose. Today I am open to all of who I am. As I bring my attention to all of me, without judgment, I grow in wisdom and freedom. --Ruth Fishel ****************************************** Journey To The Heart Develop a Sense of the Sacred During my stay in New Mexico, I found myself repeatedly– almost magnetically– drawn to the Ojo Caliente Hot Springs. The grounds weren’t fancy, soaking cost only $8.00. But I felt safe, healed, spiritually connected when I was there. At times, I felt almost an electric energy coursing through my body when I roamed the grounds. On my third visit, I noticed a small marker hidden on the side of the parking lot and I began to understand my feelings. The ancient spring was actually a Native American sacred site. The energy I felt there was real. I was standing on holy ground. Develop a sense of the sacred. Develop a sense of what is sacred to you. Allow yourself to see and feel the holy grounds in your life as you go through your days and years. Many times what we’re going through, what we’re seeing is sacred, but our minds diminish that idea. So much in life is holy, but often we don’t make the connection. Listen to your soul as you experience life. Let yourself connect with what is holy and sacred to you. Stop chattering for a moment. Be still. Experience. Ask your soul to show you what’s holy. The electric energy will rise through you. Your soul will come to attention. Learn to feel, see, and know the beauty of the journey you’re on. Develop a sense of the sacred. Where you’re standing is holy ground. ****************************************** More Language Of Letting Go Just do what you can Dear God, I am doing the best that I can. –Children’s Letters to God Sometimes all we can do is all we can do. “Maybe my talent is being a good listener,” said John. “Maybe I’m not supposed to be rich and famous. I’m supposed to be the person who just sits and listens.” The world needs listeners,too. If everyone were the storyteller, it would be a noisy place, and no one would ever get to hear the stories. Maybe you are a storyteller, maybe you are a listener. Maybe both. Maybe it will be your path to achieve recognition and fame; maybe yours is an anonymous path of service. If you’ve done all you can– whether it’s to pursue your dreams, work on that relationship, help someone else, or take care of yourself– then you’ve done your part. Maybe all we can do is all we’re meant to do, that day. God, help me do what I can and not torture myself about what I can’t. ****************************************** In God’s Care Conscience is the perfect interpreter of life. ~~Karl Barth In a moment’s pause, before we respond to a person or situation, may come a clear message indicating how we are to act or what we are to say. In that quiet moment, our conscience calls to us. Our willingness to pause, listen, and then act as our Inner Guide suggests, will ensure that our relations with others will reflect our true values. Many of us feel God’s presence most through our conscience. Seldom are we truly in doubt about the proper response to a friend. And yet we may still refuse to pause and listen to God’s message – to remember and affirm our values. And then we experience guilt and shame. We complicate our relationships needlessly when we act before we think. Our agitated ego takes over, and we lose sight of the sure knowledge that God is the director, we are the actors. A quiet mind lets us hear the directions. I will be quiet, if only for a moment, before sharing my thoughts today. ****************************************** Playing Your Part Life Is an Illusion by Madisyn Taylor As we become more enlightened on our journey of life, we become more compassionate and wise and have less attachment. As children, most of us sang that mesmerizing, wistful lullaby that ends with the words, “Life is but a dream.” This is a classic example of a deep, sophisticated truth hiding, like an underground stream, in an unlikely place. It winds its way through our minds like a riddle or a Zen koan, coming up when we least expect it and asking that we consider its meaning. Many gurus and philosophers agree with this mysterious observation, saying that this world we perceive as real is actually an illusion, not unlike a film being projected on a screen. Most of us are so involved in the projection that we don’t understand it for what it is. We are completely caught up in the illusion, imagining that we are in a life and death struggle and taking it very seriously. The enlightened few, on the other hand, live their lives in the light of the awareness that what most of us perceive as reality is a passing fancy. As a result, they behave with detachment, compassion, and wisdom, while the rest of us struggle and writhe upon the stage in the play of our life. Having the wisdom to know that life is but a dream does not mean that we ignore it or don’t do our best with the twists and turns of our fate. Rather, like an actress who plays her role fully even as she knows it’s only a role, we engage in the unfolding drama, but with a little more freedom because we know that this is not the totality of who we are. And life is more of an improvisation than it is like a play whose lines have already been written, whose end is already known. Like an improviser, we have choices to make and the more we embrace the illusionary quality of the performance, the lighter we can be on the planet, on others, and on ourselves. We can truly play with the shadows cast by the light of the projector, fully engaging without getting bogged down. Published with permission from Daily OM ****************************************** A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day Still another common thread we invariably see among slippers is that many of them felt dissatisfaction with today. “I forgot we live one day at a time,” or “I began to plan results, not just plan.” They seemed to forget that all we have is Now. Life continues to get better for them and, as many of us do, they forgot how bad it had been. They began to think, instead, of how dissatisfying it was compared to what it could be. Do I compare today with yesterday, realizing, by that contrast, what great benefits and blessings I have today? Today I Pray If I am discouraged with today, may I remember the sorrow and hassles of yesterday. If I am impatient for the future, let me appreciate today and how much better it is than the life i left behind. May I never forget the principle of “one day at a time.” Today I Will Remember The craziness of yesterday ****************************************** One More Day Be not afraid to pray, to pray is right. Pray, if thou canst with hope, but even pray. – Harley Coolidge “Now I lay me down to sleep” may have been one of our fist childhood prayers, perhaps even on of our first memories. As we grew, we may have learned to recite other prayers by rote, with little understanding. Now, we are beginning to understand and feel the need for prayer. many of us came to a belief in a Power greater than ourselves, one which can nature and sustain us. We can pray for those we love; we can pray for ourselves. Prayer can enhance and bond us with our Higher Power. It nourishes and satisfies our souls — the inner self. Prayer is a creative expression of my spiritual needs. It offers me a deep sense of personal satisfaction and continually reminds me of all life’s forces. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~ Acceptance ~ Until you make peace with who you are, you will never be content with what you have. Doris Mortman Through abstinence and recovery, I can begin to accept myself. I can pay attention to my likes and my dislikes as I continue to grow and learn about me. Learning about myself is a new adventure. There are so many layers that have been hidden under years of food abuse and weight obsession. Exploring and discovering the new me requires a lot of acceptance. There are parts of me that I do not like, and there are also wonderful surprises. By accepting all parts of myself, I am honoring my Higher Power and demonstrating spiritual recovery. One Day at a Time . . . I will accept myself. By learning to accept myself, I will find myself growing in my acceptance of others. ~ Christine S. ~ ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote Every day is a day when we must carry the vision of God's will into all of our activities. 'How can I best serve Thee - Thy will ( not mine ) be done.' These are thoughts which must go with us constantly. We can exercise our will power along this line all we wish. It is the proper use of the will. - Pg. 85 - Into Action Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Sometimes it just doesn't seem worth it. What does this new life, seemingly full of discipline and deprivation, offer us anyway? There are many promises that only time can bring. Until then we must cherish our new freedom--freedom from the expense, cravings, and cost to our personal lives in that old chemical world. Let me see the bondage of my addiction and remember not the questionable good times but the very real chains that bound me. Shifting My Feeling States When I shift my own thinking and feeling states, I shift my body states as well, because emotions travel through me as body chemicals. In a way, I am what I think about all day. I can shift what I am feeling by consciously changing my thoughts and I can shift what I'm thinking, by consciously evening out my emotional states. I will place my attention on my heart and imagine myself in a calm and serene state. As my heart calms, so does my body. When I can consciously breathe in and out of my heart zone, and imagine that part of me entering a state of ease and serenity, I actually contribute to my emotional, psychological and physical health. I calm my heart - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote In our fellowship, there are always those who feel they have the ultimate wisdom to impart to you. These highly verbose people may set your nerves on edge with incredibly self-serving 'words of wisdom.' They may be full of themselves, but they are probably not trying to hurt you. If I judge people, I have no time to love them. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book We came to AA to save our ass, and found out our soul was attached. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I am open to all of who I am. As I bring my attention to all of me, without judgment, I grow in wisdom and freedom. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote If you can't turn over everything, turn over 'right now.' - Tom W. |
April 6
Daily Reflections A LIFETIME PROCESS We were having trouble with personal relationships, we couldn't control our emotional natures, we were a prey to misery and depression, we couldn't make a living, we had a feeling of uselessness, we were full of fear, we were unhappy, we couldn't seem to be of real help to other people. . . . ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 52 These words remind me that I have more problems than alcohol, that alcohol is only a symptom of a more pervasive disease. When I stopped drinking I began a lifetime process of recovery from unruly emotions, painful relationships, and unmanageable situations. This process is too much for most of us without help from a Higher Power and our friends in the Fellowship. When I began working the Steps of the A.A. program, many of these tangled threads unraveled but, little by little, the most broken places of my life straightened out. One day at a time, almost imperceptibly, I healed. Like a thermostat being turned down, my fears diminished. I began to experience moments of contentment. My emotions became less volatile. I am now once again a part of the human family. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day All alcoholics have personality problems. They drink to escape from life, to counteract feelings of loneliness or inferiority, or because of some emotional conflict within them, so that they cannot adjust themselves to life. Alcoholics cannot stop drinking unless they find a way to solve their personality problems. That's why going on the wagon doesn't solve anything. That's why taking the pledge usually doesn't work. Was my personality problem ever solved by going on the wagon or taking the pledge? Meditation For The Day God irradiates your life with the warmth of His spirit. You must open up like a flower to this divine irradiation. Loosen your hold on earth, its cares, and its worries. Unclasp your hold on material things, relax your grip, and the tide of peace and serenity will flow in. Relinquish every material thing and receive it back again from God. Do not hold on to earth's treasures so firmly that your hands are too occupied to clasp God's hands as He holds them out to you in love. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may be open to receive God's blessing. I pray that I may be willing to relinquish my hold on material things and receive them back from God. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It When Defects Are Less Than Deadly, p. 96 Practically everybody wishes to be rid of his most glaring and destructive handicaps. No one wants to be so proud that he is scorned as a braggart, nor so greedy that he is labeled a thief. No one wants to be angry enough to murder, lustful enough to rape, gluttonous enough to ruin his health. No one wants to be agonized by chronic envy or paralyzed by sloth. Of course, most human beings don't suffer these defects at these rock-bottom levels, and we who have escaped such extremes are apt to congratulate ourselves. Yet can we? After all, hasn't it been self-interest that has enabled most of us to escape? Not much spiritual effort is involved in avoiding excesses which will bring us punishment anyway. But when we face up to the less violent aspects of these very same defects, where do we stand then? 12 & 12, p. 66 ************************************************** ********* Walk in Dry Places The Barrier of Sick Pride Sharing Feelings Pride can be either sick or healthy. It's sick pride that keeps us in bondage to alcohol. It's healthy pride that emerges when we have high self-esteem. Finding the right path in sobriety always involves a battle to keep sick pride out of our lives. What if I'm at a discussion meeting and I feel reluctant to admit that certain character defects are still giving me trouble? Can this be sick pride carrying on the pretense that I have risen above such problems? What if someone takes issue with a point I've tried to make in a discussion? Does sick pride cause me to react in self-defense? We learn in the 12 Step program that we gain nothing by attempting to conceal our character defects from our fellow members. We gain everything by sharing our true feelings and letting others know we are vulnerable human beings. There is never any need to defend or explain anything we've tried to say in a meeting. The real message always comes through in our attitude, and it will reach those for whom it's intended. I'll check myself today to see if sick pride is dictating what I say and do. The more I can let others see me as I really am, the more honest my relationships will be. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple To know the road ahead, ask those coming back.---Chinese proverb We're going down a new-road---in our recovery and in our lives. We don't know the road. We only know we're on the right one, because our Higher Power led us here. We ask for help from those who already know the road. We ask our sponsor, "How far is it until I get done feeling guilty?" "How far to self-love?" "How bumpy is the road when I'm at Step Four?" We need people who have been in the program. They tell us where to slow down because this part of the trip is beautiful. Someday, maybe today, we too will be called on to guide others. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, You've put me on this road. You've also put others on this road. Let them be my guide. Let my guides become my friends. Action for the Day: Today, I’ll find someone who has been in the program two or more years longer than me. I'll ask that person what the road ahead is like. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Treat your friends as you do your pictures, and place them in their best light. --Jennie Jerome Churchill Taking our friends and loved ones for granted, expecting perfection from them in every instance, greatly lessens the value we have in one another's life. Being hard on those closest to us may relieve some of the tension we feel about our own imperfections, but it creates another tension, one that may result in our friends leaving us behind. We need the reminder, perhaps, that our friends are special to our growth. Our paths have crossed with reason. We complete a portion of the plan for one another's life. And for such gifts we need to offer gratitude. Each of us is endowed with many qualities, some more enhancing than others; it is our hope, surely, that our lesser qualities will be ignored. We must do likewise for our friends. We can focus on the good, and it will flourish--in them, in ourselves, in all situations. A positive attitude nurtures everyone. Let us look for the good and, in time, it is all that will catch our attention. I can make this day one to remember with fondness. I will appreciate a friend. I will let her know she matters in my life. Her life will be enhanced by my attention. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition WE AGNOSTICS We found, too, that we had been worshippers. What a state of mental goose-flesh that used to bring on! Had we not variously worshipped people, sentiment, things, money, and ourselves? And then, with a better motive, had we not worshipfully beheld the sunset, the sea, or a flower? Who of us had not loved something or somebody? How much did these feelings, these loves, these worships, have to do with pure reason? Little or nothing, we saw at last. Were not these things the tissue out of which our lives were constructed? Did not these feelings, after all, determine the course of our existence? It was impossible to say we had no capacity for faith, or love, or worship. In one form or another we had been living by faith and little else. p. 54 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories The Keys Of The Kingdom A little more than fifteen years ago, through a long and calamitous series of shattering experiences, I found myself being helplessly propelled toward total destruction. I was without power to change the course my life had taken. How I had arrived at the tragic impasse, I could not have explained to anyone. I was thirty-three years old and my life was spent. I was caught in a cycle of alcohol and sedation that was proving inescapable, and consciousness had become intolerable. p. 268 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Tradition Twelve - "Anonymity is the spiritual foundation of all our traditions, ever reminding us to place principles before personalities." But it became apparent that the word-of-mouth method was too limited. Our work, as such, needed to be publicized. The A.A. groups would have to reach quickly as many despairing alcoholics as they could. Consequently, many groups began to hold meetings which were open to interested friends and the public, so that the average citizen could see for himself just what A.A. was all about. The response to these meetings was warmly sympathetic. Soon, groups began to receive requests for A.A. speakers to appear before civic organizations, church groups, and medical societies. Provided anonymity was maintained on these platforms, and reporters present were cautioned against the use of names or pictures, the result was fine. p. 186 ************************************************** ********* God, help me to let go of my need to control and to be open to the flow of the universe. -Melody Beattie It becomes a hard life when we pray to God for all sorts of help but we won't be quiet, sit back, and listen for the answers God provides. Don't dominate the conversation: Be silent and listen a little. In other words, meditate. Quiet down and observe your life. --John-Roger Positive mental energy, positive thinking, does not mean we think unrealistically or revert to denial. If we don't like something, we respect our own opinion. If we spot a problem, we're honest about it. If something isn't working out, we accept reality. But we don't dwell on the negative parts of our experience. Whatever we give energy to, we empower. --Melody Beattie "Notice the acts of kindness other people do rather than their wrongdoing. This is how the loving presence views you. We are all good, decent, loving souls who occasionally get lost." --Wayne Dyer "When things go wrong, don't go with them." --Anon. "It wasn't raining when Noah built the ark." --Howard Ruff We can trust God for daily protection. --John D. Byers ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation PRIDE "Though pride is not a virtue, it is the parent of many virtues." --M. C. Collins I need to remember that "pride" is not necessarily a negative. It is sensible to have a balanced pride in my sobriety because self-esteem will grow from the pride and respect I give to myself. God has made me and is involved with me and, therefore, I am a beautiful person. Balanced pride helps me with my appearance, grooming and personal etiquette that comes with clothes, fashion and hairstyles. Pride helps me with my communication skills - I work hard at being understood, speaking out clearly and developing better methods of being understood. Pride stops me from being taken advantage of, enabling me to say "no" to others while still feeling good about myself. A healthy sense of pride is essential for spiritual growth. Lord, let me have a realistic appreciation of myself that leads to achievement. ************************************************** ********* "For the Lord is good; His mercy is everlasting, and His truth endures to all generations." Psalms 100:5 "If you seek me with all your heart, I will let you find me." Jeremiah 29:13-14 I will say of the Lord, "He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust." Psalm 91:2 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Don't think less of yourself than God thinks of you. He has created us with worth and value beyond our comprehension. Lord, help me to live daily knowing that I am very valuable and do make a difference. The choices we make will affect our lives for better or for worse. Lord, You have given me all that I need to make wise choices. May I always take time to listen to You. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Growing Honestly "On a practical level, changes occur because what's appropriate to one phase of recovery may not be for another." Basic Text p. 101 When we first came to Narcotics Anonymous, many of us had no legitimate occupation. Not all of us suddenly decide we're going to become honest and productive model citizens the moment we arrive in NA. But we soon find, in recovery, that we are not so comfortable doing many of the things we once did without a second thought when we were using. As we grow in our recovery, we begin to be honest in matters that probably hadn't bothered us when we used. We start returning extra change a cashier may have given us by mistake, or admitting when we hit a parked car. We find that if we can begin to be honest in these small ways the bigger tests of our honesty become much easier to handle. Many of us came here with very little capacity to be honest. But we find that as we work the Twelve Steps, our lives begin to change. We are no longer comfortable when we benefit at the expense of others. And we can feel good about our newfound honesty. Just for today: I will examine the level of honesty in my life and see if I'm comfortable with it. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. In quarreling about the shadow, we often lose the substance. --Aesop There is a fable about a man and his camel who were hired by a wealthy man to get him across the desert. The journey was so hot that they stopped to rest one day, and the only shade to be found was in the shadow of the camel. The two of them began to argue about who had the rights to the camel's shadow--the owner or the renter. They were so involved in their argument that the camel ran away and they didn't notice until it was long gone. Sometimes we get so caught up in being right that we become like these two, fighting over a shadow. Instead of paying attention to our journey and sharing what we have, we let ourselves get distracted. It is more important to notice what we have, to share it as best we can, and continue our journey. What can I share with another today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. I had gone through life thinking I was better than everyone else and at the same time, being afraid of everyone. I was afraid to be me. --Dennis Wholey Looking back to the codependent or addictive times in our lives, we see with the perfect vision of hindsight. It is both embarrassing and humorous to see how misguided and deluded we were then. Grandiose images of ourselves isolated us from those around us and cut us off from true friendships with others. Many of us had strong feelings about ourselves that were in conflict - we felt both special and unworthy. In this program we grow over time to have a more realistic self-concept. We are not exactly like everyone else, but we are more like them than different. It's okay to be like others, and it's comforting, too. Accepting this, we grow fully into the whole men we were meant to be, and we relish the joy of friendship. May I accept the guidance of my Higher Power in developing a realistic and comfortable self-image. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Treat your friends as you do your pictures, and place them in their best light. --Jennie Jerome Churchill Taking our friends and loved ones for granted, expecting perfection from them in every instance, greatly lessens the value we have in one another's life. Being hard on those closest to us may relieve some of the tension we feel about our own imperfections, but it creates another tension, one that may result in our friends leaving us behind. We need the reminder, perhaps, that our friends are special to our growth. Our paths have crossed with reason. We complete a portion of the plan for one another's life. And for such gifts we need to offer gratitude. Each of us is endowed with many qualities, some more enhancing than others; it is our hope, surely, that our lesser qualities will be ignored. We must do likewise for our friends. We can focus on the good, and it will flourish--in them, in ourselves, in all situations. A positive attitude nurtures everyone. Let us look for the good and, in time, it is all that will catch our attention. I can make this day one to remember with fondness. I will appreciate a friend. I will let her know she matters in my life. Her life will be enhanced by my attention. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Patience How sick and tired we may become of people telling us to be patient or to learn patience. How frustrating it can be to want to finally have something, or to move forward, and then not have that happen. How irritating to have someone tell us to wait while our needs have not been met and were in the midst of anxiety, frustration, and inaction. Do not confuse the suggestion to be patient with the old rule about not having feelings. Being patient does not mean we go through the sometimes-grueling process of life and recovery without having feelings! Feel the frustration. Feel the impatience. Get as angry as you need to about not having your needs met. Feel your fear. Controlling our feelings will not control the process! We find patience by surrendering to our feelings. Patience cannot be forced. It is a gift, one that closely follows acceptance and gratitude. When we work through our feelings to fully accept who we are and what we have, we will be ready to be and have more. Today, I will let myself have my feelings while I practice patience. Today I am breaking out of old patterns, rewriting old tapes and letting my life flow with joy and love. --Ruth Fishel ********************************************* Journey To The Heart Be Present for Yourself Learn to be present for yourself, fully present in a way that’s new and delightful. Be present for your thoughts and emotions. Be present for the gentle way in which your heart and body lead you on. Learn to be fully present for each step of your growth, each step of your journey. Value yourself, who you are, what you think and feel, and how you grow. For many years you neglected yourself. It was as though you were unconscious of who you were, how you felt, what you believed. You believed that kept you safe, protected you from feelings you didn’t want to feel. You believed it was how you should live. Now you are learning another way. Survival is no longer enough. It does not meet the needs of your heart and your soul. Now you want to live fully and joyfully. To do that, you must be present for yourself. Be fully present for others,too. Be present for their spirits, their emotions, the words thay have to say to you, but especially be present for their hearts. You no longer have to fear losing or neglecting yourself if you are present for others. You can do this safely now. You will not be consumed by their needs, you will not become trapped in the workings of their lives. And if you’re present for yourself, you’ll know how much presence to give others. Be present for life– for the starlit skies and the chirping birds that sing in the morning sun. Be present for the earth and grass under your feet, for the feel of a snowflake in your hand. Be present for all the magic and mysteries of the universe. But most of all, be present for yourself. Then your presence for others and life will naturally follow. ********************************************* More Language Of Letting Go The power of thoughts In 1922, Egypt hailed the discovery of King Tut’s tomb by archaeologist Harold Carter. On the walls of the tomb, the magicians had scrawled that a severe punishment would befall anyone disturbing the contents of the burial site. Over the next ten years, more than twenty people involved with the excavation died suddenly or mysteriously. Whether you call it a curse or a hypnotic suggestion of sorts, what we’re talking about is the tremendous impact that suggestions have on us. We’re talking about the power of belief. Many of us spend thousands of dollars in therapy and years of our lifetime disentangling our thoughts from the beliefs of our parents, beliefs that were passed on to them by their parents, and their grandparents, and even further on down the ancestral line. Sometimes, the effects of other people’s thoughts are less blatant, and even more controlling. We can react instinctively to the silent demands of a spouse or lover, or a boss. They smile or frown– or just look at us– and we know what they mean and expect. Sometimes a casual comment by a friend can send us into a tailspin when he or she suggests, You can’t do that; it won’t work. Do it this way. Months later, when the way we’re trying to do it isn’t working out and we still keep trying and wonder why, we look back and say, “Oh. My friend told me to do it this way. Maybe he was wrong.” An important part of living in harmony with others means we enjoy doing things that please them, and we don’t unnecssarily or maliciously hurt those with whom we interact. An important part of being true to ourselves means checking ourselves from time to time to see if the things we’re doing are really what we want, or if we’re just a puppet and someone else is pulling our strings. God, help me respect the power of belief. Activity: Try a little experiment to prove to yourself how strong the mind is. Walk up to two people, whether you know them or not. Think something very positive and loving about them, but don’t say these thoughts out loud. ********************************************* In God’s Care The life of the spirit is centrally and essentially a life of action. Spirituality is something done, not merely something believed or known or experienced. ~~ Mary McDermott Shideler We often think of a spiritual life as a life of contemplation, of distancing ourselves from the rest of the world. Actually, spirituality is action. We can include spirituality in our day-to-day routines whenever we want. We can transform mundane activities into links to our Creator merely by offering a silent prayer. As we open an envelope or listen to a sales presentation, we can think of the power and the love we are receiving this moment from God. As we hear the ring of a telephone or have the day’s first cup of coffee – any number of ordinary things – we can remember that we are here by the grace of God. When we extend a helping hand, we’re saying thanks to God. A smile, a kind word, a hug – all are everyday spiritual acts. I can take spiritual action in ordinary living. ********************************************* Intelligence Speaks for Itself The Fear of Appearing Dumb The universal need to be accepted by others can be a barrier that prevents us from being ourselves around them. When we fear that the people we encounter will perceive us as inept or unintelligent, we frequently try to flaunt our grasp of large words or clever witticisms or our professional expertise in an effort to convince them that we are smart and capable. The reasons for feeling this way can be many, and they can often stem from as far back as your childhood. Many women in particular have the fear that they may appear not smart. Yet overcompensating for this fear can have the opposite effect if others are driven away by what they see as an immodest attitude or sense that you are urgently trying to prove yourself. The simple desire to be judged smart by both new and old acquaintances can cause you to reject your true self and adopt an affected persona. But in trying so persistently to project an image of supreme intelligence or capability, you deny others the opportunity! to become acquainted with the real and terrific individual you truly are. The fear that others will perceive you as unintelligent can further influence your behavior, causing you to consciously avoid speaking your mind or asking questions. You may feel uncomfortable participating in activities if there is a chance that you won’t excel or taking part in discussions with others who may have more knowledge than you. In essence, you become ashamed of who you are and attempt to encase your identity in a veneer that others will find pleasing and impressive. It is, however, a common fear—one experienced by almost everyone at some point in their lives. The simplest way to combat it is to make a personal commitment to being yourself in your home, your workplace, and among strangers. Ask yourself how you believe the individuals you encounter will react should you speak awkwardly, need clarification, or fail to be the best at some activity. By being yourself, you will discover that all people make mistakes and ask questions and that others will like and resp! ect you because they recognize the goodness in your soul. The fact that you are willing to be yourself, letting your many affirmative attributes express themselves naturally, will help you make a positive first impression on everyone you meet and earn the esteem of your family and friends. Your confidence and easygoing manner will say, "this is who I am and I am proud of the person I have become." Published with permission from Daily OM ***** ********************************************* A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day What do we say to a person who has slipped, or one who calls for help? WE can carry the message, if they’re willing to listen; we can share our experience, strength and hope. Perhaps the most important thing we can do, however, is to tell the person that we love him or her, that we’re truly happy he or she is back, and that we want to help all we can. And we must mean it. Can I still “go to school” and continue to learn from the mistakes and adversities of others? Today I Pray May I always have enough love to welcome back to the group someone who has slipped. May I listen to that person’s story-of-woe, humbly. For there, but for my Higher Power, go I. May I learn from others’ mistakes and pray that i will not re-enact them. Today I Will Remember Sobriety is never fail-safe. ********************************************* One More Day The man who makes no mistakes does not usually make anything. – Edward John Phelps We feel so vulnerable when we have a chronic illness, almost as though we are specimens, displayed as oddities. Because of our vulnerable feelings, we may be reluctant to undertake new experiences out of fear that we may expose ourselves to ridicule. Yet, actually, few people take the time or trouble to stare. Living a sequestered life and taking no chances is not the answer. There are always options available to us, but they may be different options from those we previously considered. We can decide to take new directions. The image we show to others is a reflection of the image we carry within. Trying to reach past my mistakes into new successes enhances my life. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~ Courage ~ It takes a lot of courage to show your dreams to someone else. Erma Bombeck I remember first starting my Twelve Step program. I had lots of expectations and dreams, but I couldn't talk to anyone about them. I thought my dreams were stupid and that nobody there really cared about who I was or what I wanted to achieve. This is a big problem with all of us compulsive overeaters. We all have hopes and dreams of losing our impulse to eat all the time, and of losing our excess weight. Thinking we're not worth anyone's time keeps us strong in our addiction. As we work through the Steps and learn to trust our new family of choice, we get the courage to begin to open up and share our dreams and hopes. We all find our hidden courage by praying and trusting our Higher Power. We find the courage to tell people about ourselves and trust that nobody will put us down for our past or for the future we dream of achieving. Our dreams have no time limit; they don't have to happen immediately. They may happen immediately, or it may take a long time of struggling, but as long as we have hope and courage, they will become a reality in Higher Power's time. One Day at a Time . . . I remember that we learn that, together, things become much easier. As we share our experience, strength and dreams with others, they will help us learn how we can work with a special program and plan. With Higher Power and our recovery friends, our courage grows stronger, and we find we can and will succeed. ~ Jeanette ~ ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote And we have ceased fighting anything or anyone - even alcohol. - Pg. 84 - Into Action Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Vengeance sometimes seems the only way to get back at who've hurt us. But we've found the best vengeance is living well, practicing our principles, and letting our Higher Power take care of the offenders. May I recognize and internalize that vengeance is an attribute of addiction, not recovery. I Am Aware Today, I see that my life is up to me. How I choose to live, what I will accomplish, how I conduct my intimate relationships, how I treat myself, all are in my own hands. They are gifts of awareness that I can give myself. I can process my most frustrating and difficult emotions and bring them into my conscious awareness so that I can put them into proportion. I can reframe and see things in a new and more helpful light. I can stop running from what clouds and confuses my inner being, what obscures my inner light. I am strong in the awareness that I can live as I choose to live. I am willing to walk a path of self discovery that, though difficult, builds a strength in me and a knowledge that I can survive my most difficult feelings. I do not need to be afraid of my life if I am not afraid of my inner world. I am comfortable in my own skin. I am free to be who I am. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote In order to grasp recovery we must learn, not accumulate knowledge, but really learn. Accumulating knowledge is moving from the known to the known, but learning is moving from the known to the unknown. Each time I say, 'Thy will, not mine, be done,' I move from the known to the unknown and I can learn. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book When things go wrong don't go with them. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I am breaking out of old patterns, rewriting old tapes and letting my life flow with joy and love. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote In the book 'One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest', the Indian man describes a vision he had watching his father drinking; He saw that as his father drank out of a spirit bottle, the bottle was drinking the spirit out of his father. That resonated with me - a lot. - Trip S. |
April 7
Daily Reflections A WIDE ARC OF GRATITUDE And, speaking for Dr. Bob and myself, I gratefully declare that had it not been for our wives, Anne and Lois, neither of us could have lived to see A.A.'s beginning. THE A.A. WAY OF LIFE, p. 67 Am I capable of such generous tribute and gratitude to my wife, parents and friends, without whose support I might never have survived to reach A.A.'s doors? I will work on this and try to see the plan my Higher Power is showing me which links our lives together. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day In A.A. alcoholics find a way to solve their personality problems. They do this by recovering three things. First, they recover their personal integrity. They pull themselves together. They get honest with themselves and with other people. They face themselves and their problems honestly, instead of running away. They take a personal inventory of themselves to see where they really stand. Then they face the facts instead of making excuses for themselves. Have I recovered my integrity? Meditation For The Day When trouble comes, do not say: "Why should this happen to me?" Leave yourself out of the picture. Think of other people and their troubles and you will forget about your own. Gradually get away from yourself and you will know the consolation of unselfish service to others. After a while, it will not matter so much what happens to you. It is not so important any more, except as your experience can be used to help others who are in the same kind of trouble. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may become more unselfish. I pray that I may not be thrown off the track by letting the old selfishness creep back into my life. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Self-Respect Through Sacrifice, p. 97 At the beginning we sacrificed alcohol. We had to, or it would have killed us. But we couldn't get rid of alcohol unless we made other sacrifices. We had to toss the self-justification, self-pity, and anger right out the window. We had to quit the crazy contest for personal prestige and big bank balances. We had to take personal responsibility for our sorry state and quit blaming others for it. Were these sacrifices? Yes, they were. To gain enough humility and self-respect to stay alive at all, we had to give up what had really been our dearest possessions--our ambitions and our illegitimate pride. A.A. Comes Of Age, p. 287 ************************************************** ********* Walk in Dry Places Deserving Happiness___Emotional Control Somewhere in the course of living sober, we should realize that we can deserve to be happy. If happiness is eluding us, the fault may lie in a peculiar guilt from our past. In a perverse way, we may be using unhappiness as penance for our past wrongs. We deserve to be happy if we are doing the things that should bring happiness to ourselves and others. Thinking and living rightly is a path to happiness. Meeting our obligations to society and others contributes to personal happiness. Placing the overall responsibility for our lives in God's hands is yet another route to happiness. We can also learn from our experience. Did any of us ever meet a truly happy person who was totally self-seeking? Do we remember any happy, serene people among our drinking companions? Did any of our temporary successes and victories bring permanent happiness? AA experience gives us the answers we need. Happiness is always in the direction of love and service, never in anything selfish. We deserve to be happy, but we must plant seeds of happiness by our thoughts and actions. I'll be happy today. If I'm worrying about something, I'll suspend the worry and let myself be happy in spite of it. I deserve to be happy and I am usually the person who is responsible for this happiness. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple To make the world a friendly place One must show it a friendly face.---James Whitcomb Riley We are beginning to learn that we get what we expect. Why? If we believe that people are out to get us, we'll not treat them well. We will think it's okay to "get them" before they "get us." Then, they'll be angry and want to get even. And on it goes. It's great when we can meet the world with a balance. We are honest people. We can expect others to be fair with us. We get the faith, strength, and courage to do this because of our trust in our Higher Power. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, I put my life in Your care. Use me to spread Your love to others. Action for the Day: Today, I'll spread friendliness. I will greet people with a smile. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning It is only when people begin to shake loose from their preconceptions, from the ideas that have dominated them, that we begin to receive a sense of opening, a sense of vision. --Barbara Ward A sense of vision, seeing who we can dare to be and what we can dare to accomplish, is possible if we focus intently on the present and always the present. We are all we need to be, right now. We can trust that. And we will be shown the way to become who we need to become, step by step, from one present moment to the next present moment. We can trust that, too. The past that we hang onto stands in our way. Many of us needlessly spend much of our lives fighting a poor self-image. But we can overcome that. We can choose to believe we are capable and competent. We can be spontaneous, and our vision of all that life can offer will change--will excite us, will cultivate our confidence. We can respond to life wholly. We can trust our instincts. And we will become all that we dare to become. Each day is a new beginning. Each moment is a new opportunity to let go of all that has trapped me in the past. I am free. In the present, I am free. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition WE AGNOSTICS Imagine life without faith! Were nothing left but pure reason, it wouldn’t be life. But we believed in life—of course we did. We could not prove life in the sense that you can prove a straight line is the shortest distance between two points, yet, there it was. Could we still say the whole thing was nothing but a mass of electrons, created out of nothing, meaning nothing, whirling on to a destiny of nothingness? Or course we couldn’t. The electrons themselves seemed more intelligent than that. At least, so the chemist said. p. 54 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories The Keys Of The Kingdom A little more than fifteen years ago, through a long and calamitous series of shattering experiences, I found myself being helplessly propelled toward total destruction. I was without power to change the course my life had taken. How I had arrived at the tragic impasse, I could not have explained to anyone. I was thirty-three years old and my life was spent. I was caught in a cycle of alcohol and sedation that was proving inescapable, and consciousness had become intolerable. p. 268 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Tradition Twelve - "Anonymity is the spiritual foundation of all our traditions, ever reminding us to place principles before personalities." Then came our first few excursions into major publicity, which were breathtaking. Cleveland's Plain Dealer articles about us ran that town's membership from a few into hundreds overnight. The news stories of Mr. Rockefeller's dinner for Alcoholics Anonymous helped double our total membership in a year's time. Jack Alexander's famous Saturday Evening Post piece made A.A. a national institution. Such tributes as these brought opportunities for still more recognition. Other newspapers and magazines wanted A.A. stories. Film companies wanted to photograph us. Radio, and finally television, besieged us with requests for appearances. What should we do? pp. 186-187 ************************************************** ********* It's not whether you get knocked down, it's whether you get up. --Vince Lombardi If you love somebody, let them go, for if they return, they were always yours. And if they don't, they never were. --Kahlil Gibran "Devote uninterrupted chunks of time to the most important people in your life." --Brian Tracy The only real mistake is the one from which we learn nothing. --John Powell You can sit there choosing to live your life in pain, or you can choose to take action and free yourself from the bondage. --Gary Barnes Nothing is better than experiencing joy except sharing it with someone else. --Deanna Smythe There shall be an eternal summer in the grateful heart. --Celia Thaxter ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation OLD AGE "You just wake up one morning and you got it!" --Moms Mabley I am so busy living I don't think about "getting old". I am so grateful in my recovery from alcoholism that tomorrow, the future and age are secondary. In my sickness I was always living in the future; what would tomorrow bring? Will I die crippled, lonely and afraid? My projections into the future produced an emotional pain. Today I do not need to do this. I welcome old age because I bring into it the joy and experience of my sobriety. Will I be lonely? I doubt it if I stick to my recovery program; I have so many friends all over the world meeting together to face the disease on a daily basis. Also I know that nothing could ever compare with the loneliness of my drinking days. My spiritual program reminds me to be grateful for my life and this includes the inevitability of old age. Lord, as I grow in age may I also grow in wisdom and tolerance. ************************************************** ********* "But He knows the way that I take; when He has tested me, I shall come forth as gold." Job 23:10 Do not plot harm against your neighbor who lives trustfully near you. Proverbs 3:29 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration One of the best parts of receiving blessings is enjoying them. Lord, may I take time to recognize my blessings and appreciate their wonder. As a mother sets aside gifts for her children long before they need them, so, too, has God prepared for our needs long before we call out to Him. Lord, I give thanks and place my trust in Your loving arms. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today The Value Of The Past "This firsthand experience in all phases of illness and recovery is of unparalleled therapeutic value. We are here to share it freely with any addict who wants to recover." Basic Text p. 10 Most of us came into the program with some serious regrets. We had never finished high school, or we had missed going to college. We had destroyed friendships and marriages. We had lost jobs. And we knew that we couldn't change any of it. We may have thought that we'd always be regretful and simply have to find a way to live with our regrets. On the contrary, we find that our past represents an untapped gold mine the first time we are called on to share it with a struggling newcomer. As we listen to someone share their Fifth Step with us, we can give a special form of comfort that no one else could provide - our own experience. We've done the same things. We've had the same feelings of shame and remorse. We've suffered in the ways only an addict can suffer. We can relate - and so can they. Our past is valuable - in fact, priceless - because we can use all of it to help the addict who still suffers. Our Higher Power can work through us when we share our past. That possibility is why we are here, and its fulfillment is the most important goal we have to accomplish. Just for today: I no longer regret my past because, with it, I can share with other addicts, perhaps averting the pain or even death of another. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Take time every day to do something silly. --Philipa Walker Spring fever may bring out our longings and our sense of unfilled needs for attention, play, or laughter. We may be afraid to express these needs because they are not often taken seriously, but thought of as childish. We may even be afraid our needs are so enormous that they will never be satisfied, and so we keep them bottled up inside ourselves, and all we can express to others is frustration. Spring is a reminder that we can find a way to satisfy our needs. We can give ourselves a break from work or study, laugh a little, and try to share our laughter with someone else. There are many ways to fulfill a need, and by giving what we have to offer, we may find ourselves getting back exactly what we really need, even though it may not be what we had hoped for. In the act of giving we learn we are worth giving to also. We learn that we deserve to be loved, most of all by ourselves. What do I think I need today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. Adversity introduces a man to himself. --Anonymous After difficult or challenging times we often say, "I never would have chosen to go through that, but I learned a lot from it." It could be a job situation, a failed relationship, or trouble with the law. When we bump up against something hard something that pushes back at us, our strength is tested, forcing us to draw on unknown reserves. A mountain climber standing on a safe ledge finds it difficult to move forward onto a more frightening spot. After he has completed the route, he looks back and feels good about himself because he met a challenge. We meet these challenges in many ways in our lives, and they help us build our self-respect. Whatever difficulty is facing us today, we may have to deal with it ourselves, but we do not have to be alone while we do it. We can reach out for support while we do what we must. This difficulty is part of being human and can help us see more fully who we are. I pray for the courage to face my adversity when I must and the ability to learn from it. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. It is only when people begin to shake loose from their preconceptions, from the ideas that have dominated them, that we begin to receive a sense of opening, a sense of vision. --Barbara Ward A sense of vision, seeing who we can dare to be and what we can dare to accomplish, is possible if we focus intently on the present and always the present. We are all we need to be, right now. We can trust that. And we will be shown the way to become who we need to become, step by step, from one present moment to the next present moment. We can trust that, too. The past that we hang onto stands in our way. Many of us needlessly spend much of our lives fighting a poor self-image. But we can overcome that. We can choose to believe we are capable and competent. We can be spontaneous, and our vision of all that life can offer will change--will excite us, will cultivate our confidence. We can respond to life wholly. We can trust our instincts. And we will become all that we dare to become. Each day is a new beginning. Each moment is a new opportunity to let go of all that has trapped me in the past. I am free. In the present, I am free. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Those Old Time Feelings I still have bad days. But that's okay. I used to have bad years. --Anonymous Sometimes, the old feelings creep back in. We may feel fearful, ashamed, and hopeless. We may feel not good enough, unlovable, victimized, helpless, and resentful about it all. This is codependency, a condition some describe as soul sickness. Many of us felt this way when we began recovery. Sometimes, we slip back into these feelings after we've begun recovery. Sometimes there's a reason. An event may trigger these reactions, such as ending a relationship, stress, problems on the job, at home, or in friendships. Times of change can trigger these reactions. So can physical illness. Sometimes, these feelings return for no reason. A return to the old feelings doesn't mean were back to square one in our recovery. They do not mean we've failed at recovery. They do not mean were in for a long, painful session of feeling badly. They just are there. The solution is the same: practicing the basics. Some of the basics are loving and trusting our self, detachment, dealing with feelings, giving and receiving support in the recovery community, using our affirmations, and having fun. Another basic is working the Steps. Often, working the Steps is how we become enabled and empowered to practice the other basics, such as detachment and self-love. If the old feelings come back, know for certain there is a way out that will work. Today, if I find myself in the dark pit of codependency, I will work a Step to help myself climb out. I am moving towards my goals today with just the right energy that I need. My progress will be perfect and I have the faith and trust that all the steps I take along the way will become clear when it is necessary. --Ruth Fishel ********************************************* Journey To The Heart What Are You Resisting Most? Be open to the whole journey, all parts of it. Is there a feeling, a person, a thought, a project that you have been avoiding? Is there some part of your life that you’re refusing to deal with or open up to? Is there something you’re resisting, something that makes you stubbornly say no? Ignore the voice that says, This is how I decided it will be, so I will close off to that part, I will not consider it. That is the voice of resistance. Be open to everything. Your most valuable lessons may well come from the things you’re resisting most. ********************************************* More Language Of Letting Go Examine what others expect “There’s a difference between saying we’re not going to live up to other people’s expectations and actually not living up to them,” a friend said to me one day. Other people’s expectations, or even what we imagine others expect from us, can be a powerful and motivating force. We can feel antsy, uncomfortable, wrong, and off-center when we step out of our place. These feelings can occur when we’re not living up to what other people expect from us– even, and sometimes especially, if these expectations aren’t vocalized. Expectations are silent demands. Not living up to someone’s expectations can take effort on our part. What we’re really doing when we don’t comply with what others expect from us is standing our ground and saying no. That takes energy and time. What do people expect from you? What have you trained or encouraged them to expect? Are they actually expecting this from you, or are you just imagining that expectation and imposing it on yourself? An unexamined life isn’t worth living, or so they say. The problem with living up to other people’s expectations too much is that it doesn’t leave us time to have a life. Take a moment. Ask yourself this question, and don’t be afraid to look deeply: Are you allowing someone else’s expectations to control your life? Examine the expectations you’re living up to; then live by your own inner guide. God, help me become aware of the controlling impact other people’s expectations have on my daily life. Help me know I don’t have to live up to anyone’s expectations but my own. ********************************************* In God’s Care When you pray for anyone you tend to modify your personal attitude toward him. – Norman Vincent Peale We experience a wonderful tansformation in attitude each time we, with God’s help, suppress our ego and ask for God’s blessings on someone we envy, fear, or simply don’t like. Any action we take out of genuine concern for someone else’s well-being will heighten our own – many times over. Praying may be troublesome for some of us. But as we’ve learned the value of Acting As If in other instances, we can do so with praying too. There is no formula for praying. Each attempt to speak to God is a prayer, one that God hears. Each loving thought we have toward someone near or far can be considered a prayer. We can pray in the midst of a crowd, at supper with family, laying in bed, or on our knees. With practice, prayer becomes easier. Through prayer, life becomes easier too. I will look at my attitude toward someone I’m having trouble with and work on changing it today, through prayer. ********************************************* Breathing into Order Feeling Overwhelmed Sometimes we may feel like there is just too much we need to do. Feeling overwhelmed may make it seem like the universe is picking on us, but the opposite is true: we are only given what we can handle. Difficult situations are opportunities to be our best selves, hone our skills and rise to the occasion. The best place to start is to take a deep breath. As you do, remind yourself that the universe works in perfect order and therefore you can get everything done that needs to get done. As you exhale, release all the details that you have no control over. The universe with it‘s infinite organizing power will orchestrate the right outcome. Anytime stress begins to creep up, remember to breathe through it with these thoughts. Then, make a list of everything you need to do. Note what needs to be done first, and mark the things others may be able to do for you or with you. Though we often think no one else can do it correctly or well, there are times when it is worth it to exhale, let go of our control, and ask for help from professionals or friends. With the remaining things that feel you must do yourself, take another breath and determine their true importance. Sometimes they are things we’d like to do, but aren’t really necessary. After taking these quick steps, you will find you have a plan laid out, freeing you from frenzied thoughts circling in your head. With calming deep breaths, you are now free to focus more fully on our priorities. Herbal teas or flower remedies along with wise choices about caffeine and food can help keep us from becoming frantic too. But with nothing further from us than our breath, we can breathe in our best intentions and let the rest go with an exhale. Keeping ourse! lves centered and breathing into and through life’s challenges helps us learn what we are truly capable of doing, and we will find we have the ability to rise to any occasion. Remember you aren’t being picked on, and you are never alone. Published with permission from Daily OM ********************************************* A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day Our spiritual and emotional growth in The Program doesn’t depend so deeply upon success as it does upon our failures and setbacks. If we bear this in mind, a relapse can have the effect of kicking us upstairs, instead of down. We in The Program have had no better teacher than Old Man Adversity, except in those cases where we refuse to let him teach us. Do I try to remain always teachable? Today I Pray May I respect the total Program, with its unending possibilities for spiritual and emotional growth, so that I can view a relapse as a learning experience, not “the end of the world.” May relapse for one of our fellowship serve to teach not only the person who slipped, but all of us. May it strengthen our shared resolve. Today I Will Remember If you slip, get up. ********************************************* One More Day Sometimes I have believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast. – Lewis Carroll While sitting at the table with an early morning cup of tea or coffee, we can get lost in reverie. Briefly, for a frozen moment in time, we can believe that we are capable of anything once again. We sill have the joy of our imagination, and even if there are physical restrictions placed upon us by our long-term medical condition, we can still imagine ourselves achieving an impossible dream. It’s wonderful to get lost in pure fantasy about how we would like our lives to be. We can imagine ourselves richer in relationships and in friends. Even when our body betrays us, we need never betray the belief in ourselves. I have the freedom to imagine whatever I want. My illness doesn’t restrict what I can accomplish in my mind. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~ Higher Power ~ If you spend all your time looking for Him, you might miss Her when She shows up. Neale Donald Walsch Our program of recovery teaches us that we each must lean on a Higher Power. This Higher Power is also known as "the God of my understanding." There is nothing in this Twelve Step program of ours that says that my Higher Power must be the same as your Higher Power. For some, the Higher Power in their life is a deity. The program itself, or a weekly meeting, might be the Higher Power for someone else. It doesn't matter what or who each person has for a Higher Power. Recovery is possible for everyone. Those who believe in one God can come together with those who believe in many Gods, or maybe no God at all. The atheist has just as much chance of recovery as a very religious person. The beauty of this program is that it works for everybody, regardless of their approach to the spiritual aspect. That is why it is imperative that we accept each other's ideas of a Higher Power. What works for one individual might not work for another. But one thing is sure ... the program that works if you work it, regardless of which Higher Power you decide on. One Day at a Time . . . I will work my program with my Higher Power, the God of my understanding, and allow others to work their program with the God of their understanding. ~ Jeff ~ ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote Once an alcoholic, always and alcoholic.' Commencing to drink after a period of sobriety, we are in a short time as bad as ever. - Pg. 33 - More About Alcoholism Hour To Hour - Book - Quote You may be angry with God at some point in your process of withdrawal and recovery which in turn is going to lead to guilt. You may not be sure it's 'safe' to be angry with your Higher Power. It is, because God loves you just as you are and that includes your explosive emotions as well as the sweeter ones. My God is a god of unconditional love and accepts me as I am today. A Birthday Wish Today I will make a wish. I will make a wish and trust that it will find wings. I will see it flying through the air, blown from a loving hand toward eternity. Birthdays are for wishing; wishing with a child's excitement, with an innocent faith that what I wish for can come forth. I will see my wish as already fulfilled, I will experience it as if it is happening right now, as if it is real. I am making my wish right NOW. My wishes have wings - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote People are always blaming their circumstances for being what they are. The people who get on in this world are the people who get up and look for the circumstances they want, and if they can't find them, make them.' ~George Bernard Shaw As long as I blame my past, I'm not free to claim my future. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book The Winners are stuck with me. Time for Joy - Book - Quote I am moving towards my goals today with just the right energy that I need. My progress will be perfect and I have the faith an trust that all the steps I take along the way will become clear when it is necessary. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote I never drank to get drunk. I never got up in the morning and said: 'God, it's gorgeous outside. I think I'll just get drunk and pee all over myself, maybe I'll just shame my family - Y'know what? It's so pretty, I'll just pass some bad cheques too.' - Charlie C. |
April 8
Daily Reflections AN INSIDE LOOK We want to find exactly how, when, and where our natural desires have warped us. We wish to look squarely at the unhappiness this has caused others and ourselves. By discovering what our emotional deformities are, we can move toward their correction TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p.43 Today I am no longer a slave to alcohol, yet in so many ways enslavement still threatens--my self, my desires, even my dreams. Yet without dreams I cannot exist; without dreams there is nothing to keep me moving forward. I must look inside myself, to free myself. I must call upon God's power to face the person I've feared the most, the true me, the person God created me to be. Unless I can or until I do, I will always be running, and never be truly free. I ask God daily to show me such a freedom! ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day Second, alcoholics recover their faith in a Power greater than themselves. They admit that they're helpless by themselves and they call on that Higher Power for help. They surrender their lives to God, as they understand Him. They put their drink problem in God's hands and leave it there. They recover their faith in a Higher Power that can help them. Have I recovered my faith? Meditation For The Day You must make a stand for God. Believers in God are considered by some as peculiar people. You must even be willing to be deemed a fool for the sake of your faith. You must be ready to stand aside and let the fashions and customs of the world go by, when God's purposes are thereby forwarded. Be known by the marks that distinguish a believer in God. These are honesty, purity, unselfishness, love, gratitude, and humility. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may be ready to profess my belief in God before others. I pray that I may not be turned aside by the skepticism and cynicism of unbelievers. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Anger--Personal and Group Enemy, p. 98 "As the book 'Alcoholics Anonymous' puts it, 'Resentment is the Number One offender.' It is a primary cause of relapses into drinking. How well we of A.A. know that for us 'To drink is eventually to go mad or die.' "Much the same penalty overhangs every A.A. group. Given enough anger, both unity and purpose are lost. Given still more 'righteous' indignation, the group can disintegrate; it can actually die. This is why we avoid controversy. This is why we prescribe no punishments for any misbehavior, no matter how grievous. Indeed, no alcoholic can be deprived of his membership for any reason whatever. "Punishment never heals. Only love can heal." Letter, 1966 ************************************************** ********* Walk in Dry Places Keep it Simple, BUT not simple-minded Working the Steps. Dr. Bob Smith left little in the way of written material for AA's future. His phrase "Keep it Simple," however, is now a guiding slogan in the program. What did he really have in mind with this final piece of advice? We can take it as certain that Dr. Bob…. A highly intelligent man… was not saying that we shouldn't use our heads for real thinking and study. One of the blessings of sobriety, in fact, should be the ability to think clearly and effectively. It would be a mistake to believe that one must renounce a brainpower and education in order to stay sober. The real aim of "keeping it simple" should be to stay mindful of the principles and essentials that are key to everybody else. Even the most difficult subject can usually be mattered by processes of simplification. The deepest book, for example, is still composed of only twenty-six letters. We can "Keep it Simple" by building or lives around the principles of the Twelve Step program. When we discover new ideas, they'll reinforce and expand what we've already learned. In this way, we should always be learning and growing… which is beautiful simple, but certainly not simple-minded. I'll be grateful today for the ability to think and to understand complicated subjects. With a strong foundation in the bedrock principles of AA, I can use my mind in constructive and progressive ways. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple It's a simple formula: Do your best and somebody might like it.---Dorothy Baker Our program is a selfish program. It tells us to let go of what others think. We're staying sober for ourselves, not for anyone else. Our body and our spirit are at stack. And we know what we need to do to stay sober. If we fell shaky about going to a party, we don't go---no matter who gets upset. If our job makes it hard to stay sober, we get a different one---no mater who it upsets. It's simple we must take good care of ourselves before we can be good to others. In doing this, we learn how to be a friend, a good parent, a good spouse. we have to care for ourselves to have good relationships. Do I believe it okay to be selfish when it comes to my program? Prayer for the Day : Higher Power, help me do what is best for my recovery, no matter what others think. Action for the Day: I will remind myself that staying sober is simple. I don't use chemicals. And I work the program. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Life is patchwork--here and there, scraps of pleasure and despair. Joined together, hit or miss. --Anne Bronaugh As you look ahead, to this day, you can count on unexpected experiences. You can count on moments of laughter. And you can count on twinges of fear. Life is seldom what we expect, but we can trust that we will survive the rough times. They will, in fact, soften our edges. Pleasure and pain share equally in the context of our lives. We so easily forget that our growth comes through the challenges we label "problems." We do have the tools at hand to reap the benefits inherent in the problems that may face us today. Let us move gently forward, take the program with us, and watch the barriers disappear. There is no situation that a Step won't help us with. Maybe we'll need to "turn over" a dilemma today. Accepting powerlessness over our children, or spouse, or co-worker may free us of a burden today. Or perhaps amends will open the communication we seek with someone in our lives. The program will weave the events of our day together. It will give them meaning. Today, well lived, will prepare me for both the pleasure and the pain of tomorrow. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition WE AGNOSTICS Hence, we saw that reason isn’t everything. Neither is reason, as most of us use it, entirely dependable, thought it emanate from our best minds. What about people who proved that man could never fly? Yet we had been seeing another kind of flight, a spiritual liberation from this world, people who rose above their problems. They said God made these things possible, and we only smiled. We had seen spiritual release, but liked to tell ourselves it wasn’t true. pp. 54-55 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories The Keys Of The Kingdom A little more than fifteen years ago, through a long and calamitous series of shattering experiences, I found myself being helplessly propelled toward total destruction. I was without power to change the course my life had taken. How I had arrived at the tragic impasse, I could not have explained to anyone. I was thirty-three years old and my life was spent. I was caught in a cycle of alcohol and sedation that was proving inescapable, and consciousness had become intolerable. p. 268 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Tradition Twelve - "Anonymity is the spiritual foundation of all our traditions, ever reminding us to place principles before personalities." As this tide offering top public approval swept in, we realized that it could do us incalculable good or great harm. Everything would depend upon how it was channeled. We simply couldn't afford to take the chance of letting self-appointed members present themselves as messiahs representing A.A. before the whole public. The promoter instinct in us might be our undoing. If even one publicly got drunk, or was lured into using A.A.'s name for his own purposes, the damage might be irreparable. At this altitude (press, radio, films, and television), anonymity--100 percent anonymity--was the only possible answer. Here, principles would have to come before personalities, without exception. p. 187 ************************************************** ********* I came to this program to save my butt and found out it was attached to my soul. --Anonymous Just beyond the night, another day is breaking, bringing hope to all. --D. Hockaday Newness opens eyes Be in love, at peace with all Travel to know joy --Tara "Change is simply a combination of growing up and gaining knowledge." --Jill Thomas God, help me stay alert to the lessons of today. -Melody Beattie "If you're not feeling God's Presence, who moved?" God exists everywhere. Whenever we feel abandoned by God, remember, it is we who have moved. God is always fully present to us when we remember to open our hearts to that Presence. --Mary Manin Morrissey ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation LIES "It takes a wise man to handle a lie; a fool had better remain honest." --Norman Douglas As a drinking alcoholic I was telling so many lies to cover the lies I had previously told that I got lost in a maze of untruth! Most of the lies were stupid, irrelevant and harmless - but they were all aimed at building up my ego. Making me look good. Telling people I had more. My memory could not keep up with my tongue and I became guilty, ashamed and embarrassed. Today I need to remember that there is nothing any lie can give me that I need; there is nothing in the world of fabrication that I need; I have what I need. Today I have a relationship with a God and Friend that I can understand and be vulnerable with; I don't need to be perfect to be loved. Help me to seek the good life in those things that are good. ************************************************** ********* "You are of God, little children, and have overcome them, because He who is in you is greater than he who is in the world." 1 John 4:4 Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Ephesians 4:31 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration There is no good enough reason to ever feel we are a failure. No matter how hard we fall, God is there to restore our spirit and forgive our past. Lord, help me to understand that it is this moment that counts, not the last one and with each new moment, I have a new beginning. They are wise who depend on God. Lord, Your perfect law revives my soul. Keeping Your law makes me rich. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Happiness "We come to know happiness, joy and freedom." Basic Text p. 88 If someone stopped you on the street today and asked if you were happy, what would you say? "Well, gee, let's see... I have a place to live, food in the refrigerator, a job, my car is running... Well, yes, I guess I'm happy" you might respond. These are outward examples of things that many of us have traditionally associated with happiness. We often forget, however, that happiness is a choice; no one can make us happy. Happiness is what we find in our involvement with Narcotics Anonymous. The happiness we derive from a life focused on service to the addict who still suffers is great indeed. When we place service to others ahead of our own desires, we find that we take the focus off ourselves. As a result, we live a more contented, harmonious life. In being of service to others, we find our own needs more than fulfilled. Happiness. What is it, really? We can think of happiness as contentment and satisfaction. Both of these states of mind seem to come to us when we least strive for them. As we live just for today, carrying the message to the addict who still suffers, we find contentment, happiness, and a deeply meaningful life. Just for today: I am going to be happy. I will find my happiness by being of service to others. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Any time you sense you are getting overrun by outside influences and losing your feelings, put your attention inside your body. Relax. . ., let your breath sink low. . ., breathe in your abdomen. . . . --Anne Kent Rush When we are feeling as though all our energy is scattered throughout our bodies, we need to practice centering, or focusing this energy into one place. Our center may change from day to day, and each of us feels it differently. When we're walking, we may feel power coming from our hips and spreading through the body, heart, and mind. When we're in a meditative mood, we may feel warm energy at the back of the head. At other times, we might feel a real centering place in the middle of the chest, right where our heart and arms and breathing come together. There is no one way to be at peace. Centering is a way for each of us to find and picture to ourselves our focused energy. When we can do this, we increase our power to bring about those things we want from life, those things we really do deserve. Where is my energy right now? You are reading from the book Touchstones. I'm not into isms and asms. There isn't a Catholic moon and a Baptist sun. I know the universal God is universal.... I feel that the same God force that is the mother and father of the pope is also the mother and father of the loneliest wino on the planet. --Dick Gregory In this program we seek conscious contact with God as we understand God. Some people understand God in very specific ways as a Jewish God, or a Christian God, or Moslem Allah. Others understand God in very general and unspecific ways. To some, God is the spirit of group relationships, the deeper consciousness of each man, or the whole of creation. When the word God is used in this program, it respects the different knowing of each person. Whatever understanding a man has, this program includes his perspective. It dictates none. This is a spiritual program, not a religious one. We often see our Higher Power was with us as a helpful force, long before we knew about it. Today, I am grateful for God's care. May I learn to increase in trust and. knowledge of God. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Life is patchwork--here and there, scraps of pleasure and despair. Joined together, hit or miss. --Anne Bronaugh As you look ahead, to this day, you can count on unexpected experiences. You can count on moments of laughter. And you can count on twinges of fear. Life is seldom what we expect, but we can trust that we will survive the rough times. They will, in fact, soften our edges. Pleasure and pain share equally in the context of our lives. We so easily forget that our growth comes through the challenges we label "problems." We do have the tools at hand to reap the benefits inherent in the problems that may face us today. Let us move gently forward, take the program with us, and watch the barriers disappear. There is no situation that a Step won't help us with. Maybe we'll need to "turn over" a dilemma today. Accepting powerlessness over our children, or spouse, or co-worker may free us of a burden today. Or perhaps amends will open the communication we seek with someone in our lives. The program will weave the events of our day together. It will give them meaning. Today, well lived, will prepare me for both the pleasure and the pain of tomorrow. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Self Care I don't precisely know what you need to do to take care of yourself. But I know you can figure it out. --Beyond Codependency Rest when you're tired. Take a drink of cold water when you're thirsty. Call a friend when you're lonely. Ask God to help when you feel overwhelmed. Many of us have learned how to deprive and neglect ourselves. Many of us have learned to push ourselves hard, when the problem is that were already pushed too hard. Many of us are afraid the work wont get done if we rest when were tired. The work will get done; it will be done better than work that emerges from tiredness of soul and spirit. Nurtured, nourished people, who love themselves and care for themselves, are the delight of the Universe. They are well timed, efficient, and Divinely led. Today, I will practice loving self-care. Today I can make peace within myself without needing the approval and agreement of others. Today I can love and respect people who do not always share my view of the world. --Ruth Fishel ************************************************** *********** Journey To The Heart April 8, 2013 Enjoy the Adventure It was a cold night in Sedona, Arizona. An unexpected snowstorm had passed through the usually warm city, dumping several inches of snow in a short time. The electricity was off. The cabin I was staying in was freezing. Great, I thought. I get to spend my last evening in Sedona fighting off hypothermia alone in the dark. I put on a heavy sweater, then wrapped myself in a blanket, trudged to a phone booth, and called a friend to complain. “Change your perspective,” he said. “Pretend you’re four years old. Get your flashlight. Then make a tent in your bed out of all the pillows and blankets you can find. Enjoy the adventure.” At first I balked, then I decided to try this idea. I made the tent. Bundled up. My complaints quickly turned to memories of what it was like to be a child, to play with life, to play with all the experiences life brings. Soon I fell asleep. When I awoke in the morning, the heat was back on. The lights had returned. The snow had stopped falling. Capped in a frosty layer of white, the breathtaking city of rust-iron mesas looked like a wonderland. I had learned another lesson, practical and simple. Change your perspective and enjoy the adventure. Let the child in you come out to play. ************************************************** *********** Journey To The Heart Enjoy the Adventure It was a cold night in Sedona, Arizona. An unexpected snowstorm had passed through the usually warm city, dumping several inches of snow in a short time. The electricity was off. The cabin I was staying in was freezing. Great, I thought. I get to spend my last evening in Sedona fighting off hypothermia alone in the dark. I put on a heavy sweater, then wrapped myself in a blanket, trudged to a phone booth, and called a friend to complain. “Change your perspective,” he said. “Pretend you’re four years old. Get your flashlight. Then make a tent in your bed out of all the pillows and blankets you can find. Enjoy the adventure.” At first I balked, then I decided to try this idea. I made the tent. Bundled up. My complaints quickly turned to memories of what it was like to be a child, to play with life, to play with all the experiences life brings. Soon I fell asleep. When I awoke in the morning, the heat was back on. The lights had returned. The snow had stopped falling. Capped in a frosty layer of white, the breathtaking city of rust-iron mesas looked like a wonderland. I had learned another lesson, practical and simple. Change your perspective and enjoy the adventure. Let the child in you come out to play. ********************************************* More Language Of Letting Go Stop trapping yourself “I found myself staying at home on weekends, not wandering far from home,” a woman said. “I was expecting myself to be there for my daughter whenever she wanted me, just like when she was a child. The problem was, she was in her mid-twenties and didn’t even live in the same city anymore.” It’s easy to paint ourselves into a corner with what we’ve grown accustomed to expecting from ourselves. Sometimes we can work so hard to build that career, get that relationship, or become a certain way that we start living up to an image of ourselves that has become outdated. Stop trapping yourself. Those goals might have been what we wanted then, but they don’t work anymore. And just because we achieved them doesn’t mean we can’t go on and do something else. What do you expect from yourself? Have you taken a look? Do your expectations reflect the genuine desires of your heart, or do they reflect something else? Are you grumbling and complaining about some aspect of your life– something you’re expected to do but resent? Maybe the only person expecting you to do that is yourself. Expectations can be subtle little things. Take them out and examine them. If some of them are outdated or useless, maybe it’s time to throw them away. Can you feel the rush? Listen quietly. It’s there. It’s the sound of a life and spirit being set free. God, help me aet myself free from ridiculous and unnecssary expectations. Activity: If this were the last ten years of your life, what would you be doing? Where would you be living? What would you be doing for fun. work, friendship, and love? If the answer is different from where you currently are, maybe you should be someplace else. ********************************************* Short Getaways Taking A Day Trip When vacations are not possible, consider a daytrip as an alternative for renewal and feeding your soul. We tend to think of a vacation as something that requires an enormous amount of preparation, but small daylong excursions can be just as refreshing and fulfilling as their lengthier counterparts. A short drive can be the channel that transports you into a world of novel experiences and blissful relaxation. Solo day trips can be a wonderful way to unwind from the stresses of routine existence while simultaneously feeding the soul. And when you choose to share your day trip with someone you care about, a leisurely drive becomes a chance to talk about childhood, recall favorite songs, or simply spend time enjoying one another's presence. You may be surprised to see how many day-trip possibilities exist within a mere hour's time from your home. Forests, beaches, lakes, mountains, rivers, and deserts can serve as the perfect spot for a minivacation. The physical and mental rejuvenation you experience in an unfamiliar and engaging setting are enhanced by meditation, journaling, deep breathing, or just being still with nature. Though the cost of gasoline can make taking a day trip seem frivolous, and our commitment to environmental well-being may cause us to hesitate before utilizing our cars in this manner, there are numerous ways we can effectively offset our carbon signature while still seeing to the needs of ourselves on a soul level. Since day trips tend to require much smaller investments of time and money than traditional outings, you can enjoy a diverse range of experiences day by day. On one weekend, you may be motivated by a need to connect with your natural heritage to explore a vast state park or nature preserve. On another, your curiosity can inspire you to visit a historical site that has long piqued your interest. In the end, where you go will often be less important than your willingness to broaden your horizons by removing yourself from the environment already so familiar to you. Each minigetaway you take will imbue your existence with a sensation of renewal that prepares you for whatever lies ahead. Published with permission from Daily OM ********************************************* A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day Time after time, we learn in The Program, newcomers try to keep to themselves “shoddy facts” about their lives. Trying to avoid the humbling experience of the Fifth Step, they turn to a seemingly easier and softer way. Almost invariably, they slip. Having persevered with the rest of The Program, they then wonder why they fell. The probable reasons is they they completed their housecleaning. They took inventory all right, but hung on to some of the worst items in stock. Have I admitted to God, to myself, and to another human being the exact nature of my wrongs? Today I Pray That I may include all of the sleaziness of my past, my cruelties and my dishonesty, in a complete moral inventory of myself. May I hold back nothing out of shame or pride, for the “exact nature” of my wrongs means just that — a thorough and exact recounting of past mistakes and character flaws. We have been provided with an appropriate “dumping-ground.” May I use it as it was intended. May all my throw-sways, the trash and outgrown costumes of the past, be foundation “fill” on which to build a new life. Today I Will Remember Trash can be a foundation for treasures. ********************************************* One More Day Believe me, every man has his secret sorrow, which the world knows not, and oftentimes we call a man col when he is only sad. – Henry Wadsworth Longfellow Let a person seem aloof or display a need to be apart from others, and we automatically assume we are getting a old shoulder. yet none of us has any ideas of all the components of another person’s life and feelings. We’re usually ignorant of others people’s personal characteristics. Sadness, shyness, and fear are just a few traits which can be misinterpreted. Little disappointments, large failures, loss of a dream or a loved one — these are all problems which any one of us can have, but few can share. We can choose to overlook the real and imagined wrongs of others by reminding ourselves of how little we really know of each other. My understanding of other people’s problems has been enhanced by my own illness, and I will not be so quick to judge. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~ Willingness ~ I cannot change what I am unwilling to face. James Baldwin Before I found this program I was locked in a battle with myself. I knew I was eating too much, and I couldn't help myself. I tried to control my eating, and for a while, I was able to keep the upper hand. Then something would happen in my life, and I'd lose that control. I couldn't face the fact that I was a compulsive eater. I couldn't bear to think that I had a disease that kept me in bondage to food. So during the time I was in denial about my eating, I continued sinking deeper into my disease of compulsion. I sought comfort in food, and did some serious damage to my body, to my self-esteem, and to my relationships. It was only after I hit bottom that I realized that I had to face the facts. I had a disease that had me in a death grip, and there wasn't one thing I could do about it. When I found this program, I found hope. I discovered a Higher Power who could help me do what I'd never been able to do before. I slowly began to see the changes I'd tried all my life to effect on my own. But it didn't happen until I became willing to face the truth, until I became willing to ask God for help. One Day at a Time . . . I am willing to face my disease and let my Higher Power help me overcome it. ~ Jeff ~ ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote If we are planning to stop drinking, there must be no reservation of any kind, nor any lurking notion that someday we will be immune to alcohol. - Pg. 33 - More About Alcoholism Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Many times non-program people will go off on tangents of what religious, spiritual, or philosophical paths we now take. We do not engage with this type of conversation. We simply know that we will not drink or use drugs this hour and we will hang around other people who are doing the same thing. I don't need to figure anything out right now. It is alright to not engage in any confrontation and simply be in recovery. Learning from Life There are no 'buts' today. I am what I am, others are what they are, life is what it is. I will not parenthesize my growth with a 'but,' or hold back my forward-moving spirit with second-guesses. For today, I am living with things as they are. As I give this gift to myself I feel relieved. I am exactly where I am meant to be, learning what I need to learn. All I need do is move through situations with willingness to learn and openness to feel. When feelings are brought up, I can accept them as what is happening within me-no need to resist and analyze them. I can witness, allow, observe, share and process rather than shut down and hide. I can tolerate the intensity of my own inner world. I trust that my life is unfolding in such a way that what I need to learn will be before me. I am willing to learn. I see the 'table prepared.' - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote People will tell you to 'work' the steps and that may lead you to believe that the steps are our work in recovery. Working the steps is not doing our work, they are the foundation for doing our work. Our work is getting into the trenches and helping others. When my life is not working the way I want it to, I find I may not be doing my real work. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book It gets worse, so you have to get better. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I can make peace within myself without needing the approval and agreement of others. Today I can love and respect people who do not always share my view of the world. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote We're blessed with a disease where we're forced to love people. - Terry |
April 9
Daily Reflections FREEDOM FROM "KING ALCOHOL" . . . let us not suppose even for an instant that we are not under constraint. . . . Our former tyrant, King Alcohol, always stands ready again to clutch us to him. Therefore, freedom from alcohol is the great "must" that has to be achieved, else we go mad or die. As Bill Sees It, p. 134 When drinking, I lived in spiritual, emotional, and sometimes, physical confinement. I had constructed my prison with bars of self-will and self-indulgence, from which I could not escape. Occasional dry spells that seemed to promise freedom would turn out to be little more than hopes of reprieve. True escape required a willingness to follow whatever right actions were needed to turn the lock. With that willingness and action, both the lock and the bars themselves opened for me. Continued willingness and action keep me free--in a kind of extended daily probation--that need never end. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day Third, alcoholics recover their proper relationship with other people. they think less about themselves and more about others. They try to help other alcoholics. They make new friends so that they're no longer lonely. They try to live a life of service instead of selfishness. All their relationships with other people are improved. They solve their personality problems by recovering their personal integrity, their faith in a Higher Power, and their way of fellowship and service to others. Is my drink problem solved as long as my personality problem is solved? Meditation For The Day All that depresses you, all that you fear, is really powerless to harm you. These things are but phantoms. So arise from earth's bonds, from depression, distrust, fear, and all that hinders your new life. Arise to beauty, joy, peace, and work inspired by love. Rise from death to life. You do not even need to fear death. All past sins are forgiven if you live and love and work with God. Let nothing hinder your new life. Seek to know more and more of that new way of living. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may let God live in me as I work for Him. I pray that I may go out into the sunlight and work with God. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It The "Slipper" Needs Understanding, p. 99 "Slips can often be charged to rebellion; some of us are more rebellious than others. Slips may be due to the illusion that one can be 'cured' of alcoholism. Slips can also be charged to carelessness and complacency. Many of us fail to ride out these periods sober. Things go fine for two or three years--then the member is seen no more. Some of us suffer extreme guilt because of vices or practices that we can't or won't let go of. Too little self-forgiveness and too little prayer--well, this combination adds up to slips. "Then some of us are far more alcohol-damaged than others. Still others encounter a series of calamities and cannot seem to find the spiritual resources to meet them. There are those of us who are physically ill. Others are subject to more or less continuous exhaustion, anxiety, and depression. These conditions often play a part in slips--sometimes they are utterly controlling." Talk, 1960 ************************************************** ********* Walk in Dry Places Understanding Compulsion__Protecting Sobriety Often called a "compulsive illness," alcoholism is still a baffling mystery to most people. All we really know is that a single drink, a pleasant beverage for many, becomes a deadly trigger for alcoholics. We may even think it's unfair that we're unable to enjoy the pleasant customs of social drinking. If we let down our guard, we can even entertain the thought that we've somehow been cured of the compulsion to drink. But we don't have to understand the exact nature of compulsion to realize that we are victims of it. Bitter experience and the tragic examples of others should tell us that our compulsion exists and is activated by the first drink. That's really all the understanding we need for living successfully in sobriety. If there's anything we should question, it's not whether we have the compulsion, but why we would have any doubts after so much bad experience with alcohol. After all, if we always had a bad reaction from any other food or beverage, we would soon give it up. Why is there so much persistence in denying that we are compulsively attached to alcohol? We still may be trying to convince ourselves that we can take a drink safely, and this delusion is another way the compulsion works. All we have to understand is that a single drink leads to our destruction. I'll remember today that I've accepted the fact that I am alcoholic and subject to disaster with a first drink. I'll live today with the knowledge that I only have to understand that I have a compulsion to drink. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple The best thing about the future is that it comes only one day a time. --Abraham Lincoln Abraham Lincoln did great things for the United States. He took life One Day at a time.. He broke the future into manageable pieces. We can do the same. We can live in the present and focus on the task at hand. Spirituality comes when we focus this way. When we stay in the present we find choice. And we worry less about the future. Still, we must have goals. We must plan for the future. Goals and plans help us give more credit to the present than to the future. And when we feel good about the present, we feel good about the future. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me focus. Help me keep my energy in the present. Have me live life One Day at a Time. Action for the Day: When I find myself drifting into the future, I'll work at bring myself back to the present. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning For is it not true that human progress is but a mighty growing pattern woven together by the tenuous single threads united in a common effort? --Soong Mei-ling (Madame Chiang Kai-shek) We each are spinning our individual threads, lending texture, color, pattern, to the "big design" that is serving us all. Person by person our actions, our thoughts, our values complement those of our sisters, those of the entire human race. We are heading toward the same destination, all of us, and our paths run parallel on occasion, intersect periodically, and veer off in singleness of purpose when inspiration calls us. It's comforting to be reminded that our lives are purposeful. What we are doing presently, our interactions with other people, our goals, have an impact that is felt by many others. We are interdependent. Our behavior is triggering important thoughts and responses in someone else, consistently and methodically. No one of us is without a contribution to make. Each one of us is giving what we are called upon to give when we are in a right relationship with God, who is the master artist in this design we are creating. Prayer and meditation will direct my efforts today. My purpose can then be fulfilled. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition WE AGNOSTICS Actually we were fooling ourselves, for deep down in every man, woman, and child, is the fundamental idea of God. It may be obscured by calamity, by pomp, by worship of other things, but in some form or other it is there. For faith in a Power greater than ourselves, and miraculous demonstrations of that power in human lives, are facts as old as man himself. p. 55 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories The Keys Of The Kingdom A little more than fifteen years ago, through a long and calamitous series of shattering experiences, I found myself being helplessly propelled toward total destruction. I was without power to change the course my life had taken. How I had arrived at the tragic impasse, I could not have explained to anyone. I was thirty-three years old and my life was spent. I was caught in a cycle of alcohol and sedation that was proving inescapable, and consciousness had become intolerable. p. 268 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Tradition Twelve - "Anonymity is the spiritual foundation of all our traditions, ever reminding us to place principles before personalities." These experiences taught us that anonymity is real humility at work. It is an all-pervading spiritual quality which today keynotes A.A. life everywhere. Moved by the spirit of anonymity, we try to give up our natural desires for personal distinction as A.A. members both among fellow alcoholics and before the general public. As we lay aside these very human aspirations, we believe that each of us takes part in the weaving of a protective mantle which covers our whole Society and under which we may grow and work in unity. We are sure that humility, expressed by anonymity, is the greatest safeguard that Alcoholics Anonymous can ever have. p. 187 ************************************************** ********* You have to leave the city of your comfort and go unto the wilderness of your intuition. What you'll discover will be wonderful. What you'll discover will be yourself. --Alan Alda Right now, this moment, is the time to celebrate by dancing beneath the warmth of the sun. --Gary Barnes When we are doing our best to live as God would have us live, if we are in harmony with God, we shall feel and be at peace. --SweetyZee Silence is the great revelation. --Lao Tzu "God answers all kneel-mail." --Gary R. Happiness is not having what you want, but wanting what you have. Make a conscious effort to thank God today. --Patricia Ferris ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation SERVICE "No one is useless in this world who lightens the burdens of another." Charles Dickens As a drunk I thought that the world owed me a living. Everybody existed for my employment and service; the world was waiting for my telephone call! For years I manipulated people, and I was such a good con artist they often left thanking me! Today a part of my spiritual program requires service. I make the coffee, put out the cookies, cook the meal and invite friends for dinner. I make the telephone call, give the lectures, share in groups and write articles. The life of service helps to keep me sober. I am the message that I share. And I do it for me! Thank you for making me aware of my need to give. ************************************************** ********* It is good that a man should both hope and quietly wait for the salvation of the LORD. Lamentations 3:26 But lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust doth consume, and where thieves do not break through nor steal. Matthew 6:20 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Courage is not the lack of fear, but the ability to go on in spite of it. Lord, may I be strong in my abilities and courageous in my beliefs. In life it is those that persevere that will succeed. Lord, every day is a fresh beginning. With You, I will come closer to my goals each day if only I don't give up and quit. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Acting Out "We learn to experience feelings and realize they can do us no harm unless we act on them." IP No. 16, "For the Newcomer" Many of us came to Narcotics Anonymous with something less than an overwhelming desire to stop using. Sure, the drugs were causing us problems, and we wanted to be rid of the problems, but we didn't want to stop getting high. Eventually, though, we saw that we couldn't have one without the other Even though we really wanted to get loaded, we didn't use; we weren't willing to pay the price anymore. The longer we stayed clean and worked the program, the more freedom we experienced. Sooner or later, the compulsion to use was lifted from us completely, and we stayed clean because we wanted to live clean. The same principles apply to other negative impulses that may plague us. We may feel like doing something destructive, just because we want to. We've done it before, and sometimes we think we've gotten away with it, but sometimes we haven't. If we're not willing to pay the price for acting on such feelings, we don't have to act on them. It may be hard, maybe even as hard as it was to stay clean in the beginning. But others have felt the same way and have found the freedom not to act on their negative impulses. By sharing about it and seeking the help of other recovering people and a Power greater than ourselves, we can find the direction, the support, and the strength we need to abstain from any destructive compulsion. Just for today: It's okay to feel my feelings. With the help of my sponsor, my NA friends, and my Higher Power, I am free not to act out my negative feelings. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. There are persons who have some parts like me, but no one adds up exactly like me. --Virginia Satir Most of us feel pretty ordinary. We probably wish we were taller or shorter. Some of us are fat rather than thin. Few of us have perfect skin or teeth. Often we look at others, compare ourselves, and wish we were different. At these times, it's important to remember that each of us is special. We differ from others because we're created for different purposes. Some of us will make a contribution to the world of sports, some to the art of music. Teaching or medicine will attract others and yet, no two of us will give to the world in the same way. Our unique mixture of looks, attitudes, and abilities will be special and very necessary to the people sharing our lifetime. How can I give my special gift to the world today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. It is the greatest of all mistakes to do nothing because you can only do a little. Do what you can. --Sydney Smith We are capable of far more than we think. The task before us sometimes seems mountainous, but we don't have to do it all in one day. We can do only a little, although we want to accomplish the whole job at once. We must not let our desire for complete change all at once discourage us from doing what we can. We may need to look for a new job, or face the loneliness of ending a hurtful relationship, or hold firmly to our wisest fathering role with our children, or deal with an illness in ourselves or a loved one. We do not have to face the tasks that challenge us by ourselves. We are all members of a large, quiet network of spiritual support for each other. We have our Twelve Step program, the loving strength of our Higher Power, and the companionship of other men and women in our group. With help, we can do what must be done. We only need to faithfully do a little at a time. Today, I will remember that I am not alone. I have help in many forms, and I will do what I can. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. For is it not true that human progress is but a mighty growing pattern woven together by the tenuous single threads united in a common effort? --Soong Mei-ling (Madame Chiang Kai-shek) We each are spinning our individual threads, lending texture, color, pattern, to the "big design" that is serving us all. Person by person our actions, our thoughts, our values complement those of our sisters, those of the entire human race. We are heading toward the same destination, all of us, and our paths run parallel on occasion, intersect periodically, and veer off in singleness of purpose when inspiration calls us. It's comforting to be reminded that our lives are purposeful. What we are doing presently, our interactions with other people, our goals, have an impact that is felt by many others. We are interdependent. Our behavior is triggering important thoughts and responses in someone else, consistently and methodically. No one of us is without a contribution to make. Each one of us is giving what we are called upon to give when we are in a right relationship with God, who is the master artist in this design we are creating. Prayer and meditation will direct my efforts today. My purpose can then be fulfilled. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Giving Learning to be a healthy giver can be a challenge. Many of us got caught up in compulsive giving - charitable acts motivated by uncharitable feelings of guilt, shame, obligations, pity, and moral superiority. We now understand that catering and compulsive giving don't work. They backfire. Caretaking keeps us feeling victimized. Many of us gave too much, thinking we were doing things right; then we became confused because our life and relationships weren't working. Many of us gave so much for so long, thinking we were doing Gods will; then in recovery, we refused to give, care, or love for a time. That's okay. Perhaps we needed a rest. But healthy giving is part of healthy living. The goal in recovery is balance - caring that is motivated by a true desire to give, with an underlying attitude of respect for others and ourselves. The goal in recovery is to choose what we want to give, to whom, when, and how much. The goal in recovery is to give, and not feel victimized by our giving. Are we giving because we want to, because its our responsibility? Or are we giving because we feel obligated, guilty, ashamed, or superior? Are we giving because we feel afraid to say no? Are the ways we try to assist people helpful, or do they prevent others from facing their true responsibilities? Are we giving so that people will like us or feel obligated to us? Are we giving to prove were worthy? Or are we giving because we want to give and it feels right? Recovery includes a cycle of giving and receiving. It keeps healthy energy flowing among our Higher Power, others, and us. It takes time to learn how to give in healthy ways. It takes time to learn to receive. Be patient. Balance will come. God, please guide my giving and my motives today. My heart is open to all that happens in my life today. There is such joy in being alive and feeling everything with a full and open heart. --Ruth Fishel ******************************************* Journey To The Heart Take Better Care of Yourself Take better care of yourself than you ever have before. That’s what your heart is telling you to do. Those times of driving yourself, depriving yourself, not being gentle and loving with yourself will no longer work. Punishing, criticizing, repressing, and denying won’t bring the feelings, the growth, the result you’re seeking. The harder you push, the more you relentlessly demand perfection, the worse you’ll feel. Fall in love with yourself. Be gentle, loving, kind, and attentive. Take time throughout each day to tend to your needs, just as you would tend to someone you loved deeply and dearly. Loving and caring for yourself this way won’t waste time. It’s not a delay. Take better care of yourself, and life’s magic will return. Your life will improve. You’ll feel better,too. Taking care of yourself is a simple act with profound consequences. The better and more often you care for yourself, the more you’ll align with the universe and God’s love. ******************************************* More Language Of Letting Go You get to choose Don’t forget that we get to choose. I got my “A” license in skydiving. I continued to jump. But I was procrasitnating on buying my own parachute and gear. I used the rental gear, even though it didn’t fit my body comfortably and I was throwing money down the drain. I used the rental gear because the student parachutes were big. A lot of sky divers start going for the smallest possible canopy as soon as they get into the sport. That didn’t work for me. As safe as I try to be and as much as I concentrate on landing properly, I usually land on my behind. The bigger the canopy over my head, the better my behind feels when I land. Whenever I discuss buying my own gear, the other skydivers would start insisting that I had to buy a small canopy, not to waste my money going big. So I put off the purchase, wondering when I’d want to jump and land with a canopy that small. One day Eddy, a sky diver with more than ten thousand jumps and no injuries in the sport, pulled me aside. He asked me if I had bought my equipment. I told him no. He asked why. I told him because everybody had told me that when I bought my first canopy, it should be smaller than the size I was comfortable jumping. “Don’t be ridiculous. Order the largest size you can. You’re the one jumping. You’re the one paying for the gear. Don’t let other people convince you that you shouldn’t have what you want. Do what’s right for you, and you’ll be in this sport for a long time.” I was comforted and surprised by his words. How easy it is to let other people’s expectations control our thoughts and actions. Sometimes we just need a little reminder that it’s more than okay to choose what’s right for us– it’s what we’re meant to do. God, help me set myself free from the limits that other people put on me. ******************************************* Learned Self-Reliance The Negative Effects of Spoiling Children Parents are moved by instinct to love, nurture, and provide for their offspring. Because our children are so much a part of us, we want to see them blissfully happy. Also, our own desire to be liked, materialist pressures, and a fervent wish that our children have everything we lacked as youngsters can prompt us to spoil them. However, while it might seem that buying your child expensive gifts will give them fond memories of childhood or that you can heal your emotional wounds by doting on your sons and daughters, you may be unconsciously interfering with your children’s evolutional development. One of the most precious gifts you can grant your children is the true independence they gain when they learn to earn what they covet and become stewards of their own happiness. Try allowing your children to experience life to the fullest. Let them work and earn what they want. When the time comes for them to go to college and enter the workforce, you will have the confidence that yo! u have raised a child that can both enter and contribute to society confidently. When children are not afforded the opportunity to explore self-reliance, to understand that with possession comes price, and to fulfill their own needs, they develop a sense of entitlement that blinds them to the necessity of hard work and the needs of others. We may spoil children because giving them gifts is pleasurable. Or we may want to avoid conflict out of fear that our children won’t love us. Yet children who are given acceptance, love, and affection in abundance are often kinder, more charitable, and more responsible than those whose parents accede to their every material demand. They develop a strong sense of self that stretches beyond possessions and the approval of their peers, and as adults they understand that each individual is responsible for building the life they desire. If you find yourself giving in to your child’s every whim, ask yourself why. You may discover that you are trying to answer for what you feel is lacking in your own life. Rearing your children to respect the value of money and self-sufficiency as they grow from infants to young adults is a challenging but rewarding process. It can be difficult to watch a child struggle to meet a personal goal yet wonderful to be by their side as they achieve it. Your choice not to spoil your children will bless you with more opportunities to show them understanding and compassion and to be fully present with them as they journey toward adulthood. Published with permission from Daily OM ******************************************* A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day Faith is more than our greatest gift: its sharing with others that our greatest responsibility. May we of The Program continually seek the wisdom and the willingness by which we may well fulfill the immense trust of which the Giver of all. Perfect gifts has placed in our hands. If you pray, why worry? If you worry, why pray? Today I Pray Our God is a mighty fortress,m a bulwark who never fails us. Many we praise Him for our deliverance and for our protection. He gives us the right of faith to share. May we pass it along to others as best we know how and in the loving spirit in which He gave it to us. Today I Will Remember God will not fail us. ******************************************* One More Day The comforter’s head never aches. – Italian Proverb Sometimes, people who undergo a family crisis, such as the sudden death of a loved one, hold up commendably during the most difficult times, only to collapse later. While none of us can always stay calm, we rarely buckle when our strength is needed by others. We comfort our loved ones when they’re angry, hurt, or disappointed. We comfort friends who have undergone surgery or had other crises of their own. We sit by the bed of people we love as they wait to die. Again and again, we prove we are strong. Our experience in comforting others helps us recognize the strength of our friends and family when they comfort us in our anger or disappointment, in our sadness or illness. I am proud I can give comfort and strength to those who need it. I am grateful for those who comfort me. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~ Feelings ~ Few are those who see with their own eyes and feel with their own hearts. Albert Einstein Before working the Twelve Step program, one reason I used to overeat was that I couldn't manage my feelings. My feelings were overwhelming and incapacitating to me. I would also overreact to feelings and this would make them truly more than I could handle. So I would then overeat to make the feelings stop. I would stuff myself, to stuff them down! In working the Twelve Step program, I got a chance to work through past hurts and resentments that intensified my feelings. I learned to feel my feelings, just as they are, and how to stop overreacting to them. I learned to sort through messages my family gave me about feelings, that it's not okay to have or feel or express them. I learned to decide what is true for me, today, about feelings. I also worked through my codependency issues and learned how to communicate feelings in an appropriate, effective and loving way. Now feelings are a part of my life and not something overwhelming and incapacitating. In fact, they have become something beautiful that enrich my life and give it color and texture and even pleasure. One Day at a Time . . . I honor the blessing of having my feelings returned to me. I enjoy them, and I respect my feelings and those of others. I thank my Higher Power for this wonderful gift. ~ Lynne ~ ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote But it is clear that we made our own misery. God didn't do it. Avoid then, the deliberate manufacture of misery, but if trouble comes, cheerfully capitalize it as an opportunity to demonstrate His omnipotence. - Pg. 133 - The Family Afterward Hour To Hour - Book - Quote By witnessing the miracle of recovery happening for others, we can come to believe that this miracle can happen for us as well. Look at the miracles around you, 1 month off drugs, 3 months, 6 months or years. You are surrounded by living miracles. Let me know that all the living miracles around me once felt as desperate as I--and that I too am a miracle every hour I stay away from that first fix, pill, drink, toke, or snort. Empowering My Own Day There are no victims, only volunteers. If there is something I don't like in the way things are going for me, I will see what I can change. I can change the subject if someone goes on and on about things that I don't want to talk about. I can change my routines or change the way I get to where I am going, I can set boundaries with my time if I am feeling over scheduled. My time and what I do with it is precious to me, it is all I have to call my very own. I won't throw it away and then blame someone else gobbling it up. I have a right to protect the quiet and enjoyment of my day, to do more of those things that give me pleasure and fewer of those things that run me down. If I am living up to my responsibilities, that is enough. I won't throw my time away with both hands - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote One of the joys of this program is the path it provides us with to do the right thing. Our steps don't give us a whole lot of room for justifications. There is no right way to do the wrong thing. I learn to do the next right thing, not the next 'me' thing. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Whenever you try to get even, you get even worse. Time for Joy - Book - Quote My heart is open to all that happens in my life today. There is such joy in being alive and feeling everything with a full and open heart. 'Sometimes we turn to God when our foundations are shaking, only to find out it is God who is shaking them.' -- Unknown Alkiespeak - Book - Quote I thought controlled drinking was; you drink all you can and then try to control yourself. - Sean A. |
April 10
Daily Reflections GROWING UP The essence of all growth is a willingness to change for the better and then an unremitting willingness to shoulder whatever responsibility this entails. AS BILL SEES IT, p. 115 Sometimes when I've become willing to do what I should have been doing all along, I want praise and recognition. I don't realize that the more I'm willing to act differently, the more exciting my life is. The more I am willing to help others, the more rewards I receive. That's what practicing the principles means to me. Fun and benefits for me are in the willingness to do the actions, not to get immediate results. Being a little kinder, a little slower to anger, a little more loving makes my life better--day by day. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day When I came into A.A., I came into a new world. A sober world. A world of sobriety, peace, serenity, and happiness. But I know that if I take just one drink, I'll go right back into that old world. That alcoholic world. That world of drunkenness, conflict, and misery. That alcoholic world is not a pleasant place for an alcoholic to live in. Looking at the world through the bottom of a whiskey glass is no fun after you've become an alcoholic. Do I want to go back to that alcoholic world? Meditation For The Day Pride stands sentinel at the door of the heart and shuts out the love of God. God can only dwell with the humble and the obedient. Obedience to God's will is the key unlocking the door to God's kingdom. You cannot obey God to the best of your ability without in time realizing God's love and responding to that love. The rough stone steps of obedience lead up to where the mosaic floor of love and joy is laid. Where God's spirit is, there is your home. There is heaven for you. Prayer For The Day I pray that God may make His home in my humble and obedient heart. I pray that I may obey His guidance to the best of my ability. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It The Forgotten Mountain, p. 100 When I was a child, I acquired some of the traits that had a lot to do with my insatiable craving for alcohol. I was brought up in a little town in Vermont, under the shadow of Mount Aeolus. An early recollection is that of looking up at this vast and mysterious mountain, wondering what it meant and whether I could ever climb that high. But I was presently distracted by my aunt who, as a fourth-birthday present, made me a plate of fudge. For the next thirty-five years I pursued the fudge of life and quite forgot about the mountain. << << << >> >> >> When self-indulgence is less than ruinous, we have a milder word for it. We call it "taking our comfort." 1. A.A. Comes Of Age, pp. 52-53 2. 12 & 12, p. 67 ************************************************** ********* Walk in Dry Places Protecting Sobriety Though AA members never criticize drinking customs, we do tell newcomers that it's wise to avoid situations involving alcohol. Even this is not an absolute, because we also concede that it's sometimes necessary to attend a cocktail reception or to lunch with a friend in a bar. So how do we distinguish between what's safe and what's likely to lead to trouble. The litmus test is always to look at our own motives and spiritual guidance. A drink has no power over us unless we want to take the drink. If we are not deliberately seeking out drinking situations, our motives are probably good. If our spiritual house is in order, our Higher Power will also protect us in any situation. Wherever we go, however, we should also make our sobriety the first priority of business. Whatever the importance of any social event, it is insignificant compared with the importance of sobriety. Keep sobriety at the top of your list, and the other decisions will follow in proper order. We should hole the additional thought that "walking in dry places" is really thinking of our selves as always being in dry places under God's guidance. ..Today I will focus on the sober world I want to enjoy and share. The world of drinking has nothing for me. I may encounter situations involving casual drinking today, but I will not be part of them in mind and spirit. I will think and walk in dry places. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple You cannot prevent the birds of sadness from passing over your head, but you can prevent their making their nest in your head.---Chinese proverb Life is full of feelings. We can be happy, sad, mad, scared. These feelings can come and go quickly. Or we may hang on to them. As recovering addicts, we used to hang on to feelings that made us feel bad. We let them make"nest" in our hair. We used our feelings as excuse to drink or use other drugs. Now we're learning to hang on to our good feelings. We can let go of anger, hurt, and fear. We can shoo away the birds of sadness and welcome the birds of happiness. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me become a "bird watcher." Help me learn from my feelings. And help me let go of the bad one so I can be happy. Action For the Day: If I need to get rid of the sadness or anger that I'm hanging on to, I'll get help from my sponsor, a counselor, or a clergy person. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Even though I can't solve your problems, I will be there as your sounding board whenever you need me. --Sandra K. Lamberson The prize we each have been given is our ability to offer full and interested attention to people seeking our counsel. And seldom does a day pass, that we aren't given the opportunity to listen, to nurture, to offer hope where it's been dashed. We are not separate, one from another. Interdependence is our blessing; however, we fail to recognize it at our crucial crossroads. Alone we ponder. Around us, others, too, are often suffering in silence. These Steps that guide our lives push us to break the silence. The secrets we keep, keep us from the health we deserve. Our emotional well-being is enhanced each time we share ourselves - our stories or our attentive ears. We need to be a part of someone else's pain and growth in order to make use of the pain that we have grown beyond. Pain has its purpose in our lives. And in the lives of our friends, too. It's our connection to one another, the bridge that closes the gap. We dread our pain. We hate the suffering our friends must withstand. But each of us gains when we accept these challenges as our invitations for growth and closeness to others. Secrets keep us sick. I will listen and share and be well. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition WE AGNOSTICS We finally saw that faith in some kind of God was a part of our make-up, just as much as the feeling we have for a friend. Sometimes we had to search fearlessly, but He was there. He was as much a fact as we were. We found the Great Reality deep down within us. In the last analysis it is only there that He may be found. It was so with us. p. 55 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories The Keys Of The Kingdom I was married at twenty, had two children, and was divorced at twenty-three. My broken home and broken heart fanned my smoldering self-pity into a fair-sized bonfire, and this kept me well supplied with reasons for having another drink, and then another. p. 269 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Foreword Alcoholics Anonymous is a worldwide fellowship of more than one hundred thousand* alcoholic men and women who are banded together to solve their common problems and to help fellow sufferers in recovery from that age-old, baffling malady, alcoholism. *In 1998, it is estimated that nearly two million have recovered through A.A. p. 15 ************************************************** ********* May I look at my experiences, not as trouble, but as a way to use my experience to help others. --SweetyZee When you make a mistake, make amends immediately. Kindness can become its own motive. We are made kind by being kind. --Eric Hoffer Life is like a mirror. If you frown at it, it frowns back. If you smile, it returns the greeting. "One of the greatest gifts you can give to anyone is the gift of attention." --Jim Rohn "Develop a benevolent world view; look for the good in the people and circumstances around you." --Brian Tracy ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation TODAY "Real generosity towards the future consists in giving all to what is present." --Albert Camus Much of the gratitude that I talk about needs to be centered in what I do with today; I need to focus on the present, rather than procrastinate for the future. As a sick alcoholic I lived either in the guilt of yesterday or the fear of tomorrow - missing the reality of the present. The present moment is all that I have and through this "moment" I live and breathe and have my existence! My understanding of prayer is centered in the present moment because any understanding of relationship and communication, especially with God, must begin from where one is, rather than where one would like to be. Spirituality is the reality of the moment. Master, thank You for the life that is experienced in the moment. ************************************************** ********* "O Lord my God, I will give thanks to you forever." Psalm 30:12 "You are worthy, O Lord, to receive glory and honor and power; for You created all things, and by Your will they exist and were created." Revelation 4:11 Then Jesus told him, "Because you have seen me, you have believed; blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed." John 20:29 At that time the disciples came to Jesus and asked, "Who is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven?" He called a little child and had him stand among them. And he said: "I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Therefore, whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven." Matthew 18:1-4 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Let life's lessons grow into wisdom so that you may be the light for someone else's darkness. Lord, help me put to good use that which today brings so that I am better prepared for tomorrow. To know someone doesn't mean to know every detail of that person's life. It means to feel affection, confidence and to believe in that person. Lord, may I really know You and have it reflect in how I treat others. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Too Busy "We must use what we learn or we will lose it, no matter how long we have been clean." Basic Text, p. 82 After putting some clean time together, some of us have a tendency to forget what our most important priority is. Once a week or less we say, "I've gotta get to a meeting tonight. It's been.. " We've been caught up in other things, important for sure, but no more so than our continued participation in Narcotics Anonymous. It happens gradually. We get jobs. We reunite with our families. We're raising children, the dog is sick, or we're going to school at night. The house needs to be cleaned. The lawn needs to be mowed. We have to work late. We're tired. There's a good show at the theater tonight. And all of a sudden, we notice that we haven't called our sponsor, been to a meeting, spoken to a newcomer, or even talked to God in quite a while. What do we do at this point? Well, we either renew our commitment to our recovery, or we continue being too busy to recover until something happens and our lives become unmanageable. Quite a choice! Our best bet is to put more of our energy into maintaining the foundation of recovery on which our lives are built. That foundation makes everything else possible, and it will surely crumble if we get too busy with everything else. Just for today: I can't afford to be too busy to recover. I will do something today that sustains my recovery. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. But don't go into Mr. McGregor's garden. --Beatrix Potter Since we are members of a family, we are not free to do anything we like. We may not be able to go as far from home as we would like. We may have to get up earlier in the morning than we would like. We may have only limited use of the car. Families set up limits in order to maintain order and happiness. If each of us demanded something different for supper each night, the situation would be unmanageable. Limits also keep us safe. When Peter Rabbit was told not to go into Mr. McGregor's garden, it was for his own good. Limits and restrictions are a form of love and protection, and we all have them. When we bump up against one of these limits, we can be assured they serve to point us in another direction, one with freedoms of its own which we may never have explored without being forced to. What freedom can I discover in a limitation today? You are reading from the book Touchstones. Chaos demands to be recognized and experienced before letting itself be converted into a new order. --Hermann Hesse The forces of chaos and forces of order are always at work in the world. While many things are being built up, many are wearing down. It is a good thing, because life would be very boring in an unchanging state. But the chaos we met in our lives was often extreme and unusually destructive. We had to recognize it and feel the pain of it before we could build a new order. Looking back we can see that our First Step was just such an event. All people have small chaotic events in their lives every day. If we take a moment and reflect on our present lives, we can certainly become aware of some ways in which things are in disarray. By simply letting ourselves know it in this moment, we get ready for the new order to begin. I pray for courage and honesty to see the chaos which exists today. Help me become ready for the new order to evolve. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Even though I can't solve your problems, I will be there as your sounding board whenever you need me. --Sandra K. Lamberson The prize we each have been given is our ability to offer full and interested attention to people seeking our counsel. And seldom does a day pass, that we aren't given the opportunity to listen, to nurture, to offer hope where it's been dashed. We are not separate, one from another. Interdependence is our blessing; however, we fail to recognize it at our crucial crossroads. Alone we ponder. Around us, others, too, are often suffering in silence. These Steps that guide our lives push us to break the silence. The secrets we keep, keep us from the health we deserve. Our emotional well-being is enhanced each time we share ourselves - our stories or our attentive ears. We need to be a part of someone else's pain and growth in order to make use of the pain that we have grown beyond. Pain has its purpose in our lives. And in the lives of our friends, too. It's our connection to one another, the bridge that closes the gap. We dread our pain. We hate the suffering our friends must withstand. But each of us gains when we accept these challenges as our invitations for growth and closeness to others. Secrets keep us sick. I will listen and share and be well. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Using Others to Stop Our Pain Our happiness is not a present someone else holds in his or her hands. Our well being is not held by another to be given or withheld at whim. If we reach out and try to force someone to give us what we believe he or she holds, we will be disappointed. We will discover that it is an illusion. The person didn't hold it. He or she never shall. That beautifully wrapped box with the ribbon on it that we believed contained our happiness that someone was holding - its an illusion! In those moments when we are trying to reach out and force someone to stop our pain and create our joy, if we can find the courage to stop flailing about and instead stand still and deal with our issues, we will find our happiness. Yes, it is true that if someone steps on our foot, he or she is hurting us and therefore holds the power to stop our pain by removing his or her foot. But the pain is still ours. And so is the responsibility to tell someone to stop stepping on our feet. Healing will come when were aware of how we attempt to use others to stop our pain and create our happiness. We will heal from the past. We will receive insights that can change the course of our relationships. We will see that, all along, our happiness and our well being have been in our hands. We have held that box. The contents are ours for the opening. God, help me remember that I hold the key to my own happiness. Give me the courage to stand still and deal with my own feelings. Give me the insights I need to improve my relationships. Help me stop doing the codependent dance and start doing the dance of recovery. I am attracted to positive people and I attract positive people to me. Today I continue to seek and find people who are positive, healthy and nurturing. --Ruth Fishel ******************************************* Journey To The Heart Be Aware of the Energy Around You I stopped at a quaint little store in the mountain city of Solvang, California. It was filled with clocks, tick, tick, ticking away. Some sang, some chirped. Some just ticked. “If you wind them together long enough, they’ll all soon begin ticking together in harmony,” the shopkeeper told me knowingly. I listened. What she said was true. We are energy and vibration. When we’re open, how easy it is to begin ticking to the rhythm of those around us. If we had kept ourselves locked up and put away, it would be different. But since we’ve chosen to be open, to be sensitive, to open our hearts and souls, we’ll connect with, tick to, vibrations of those around us. Our energy fields will touch and merge. We’ll begin to feel, and sometimes visibly take on, the characteristics, rhythms, and vibrations of those in our field. Pay attention to, choose carefully, those with whom you live, eat, and play. There may be times when you can handle their energy, and times it isn’t right for you. Sometimes, when we’re feeling off balance, it may be that we’re around energy that just isn’t right for us. Stay conscious of who you travel with on this journey. See who you’re attracted to and notice who is attracted to you. See how much better you feel when you surround yourself with the energy of love. ******************************************* More Language Of Letting Go Make the hard calls Sometimes we make choces with relative ease. One option feels right. We have no negative feelings about the other choice. On some occasions, we may be faced with what one man described as a “hard call.” “I had raised my own children alone,” Jason said. “And I did a good job. I enjoyed my independence, but I relished the idea of being in a relationship at some time in my life. A few years after my two children left home, I met a woman I truly liked. We spent time together, got right up to the edge of being committed, but I had to back off. “I liked her, but she had two children of her own. They were teenagers. They didn’t want me in their mother’s life. I didn’t want to lose this woman. But at a deeper level, I really didn’t want to be involved in the teenage years of raising someone else’s children. I knew I had to let her go,” he said. “It was a hard call.” A hard call is when we don’t like either choice, but one option is unacceptable. Hard calls can take many shapes and forms. We may love someone who has a serious drinking problem and simply decide we can’t live with him or her– despite how we feel about the person. We may love someone who has physically abused us or displayed signs of violent behavior, while our feelings may be genuine, so is the danger. We can be faced with hard calls at work. At one point in my life, I could barely tolerate my supervisors. But I liked the work I was doing. I decided to stay; I’m still glad I did. Hard calls are a part of life. They force us to examine our values and determine what’s genuinely important to us. They insist that we choose the path that’s in our highest good. God, when I am faced with a tough decision, help me be gentle with myself and others as I sort out, with your help, what’s right for me. ******************************************* Know Your Food Eating Close to the Earth by Madisyn Taylor Eating organic local food will change your life for the positive in so many ways as you connect with the earth and your community. The food we eat is a multidimensional aspect of our lives. Food provides us with the energy that enables us to grow and prosper. Yet it can be, and frequently is, much, much more. Our food can be an experience in and of itself if we allow it to be. The dishes we remember from childhood offer unmatched comfort. The act of preparing meals can be an art form of the highest caliber. And the nourishment we derive from this fare promotes wellness within us. But many of us, distracted by daily affairs, forget that the profound pleasures of eating go beyond simple sustenance. We eat foods that are convenient or we eat unconsciously, snacking on whatever happens to be on hand. To understand the true value of food and the impact it can have on our lives, we should acknowledge and honor it by eating close to the earth. If you have ever shelled and eaten garden-grown peas or bitten into a sun-warmed apple freshly plucked from its tree, you likely understand that there is a marked difference between these foods and those that are processed and stacked on supermarket shelves. Food recently picked contains more of its original life force and thus has a greater store of energy and nutrients. You can ensure you are eating close to the earth—and enjoying the many benefits of doing so—by shopping at a local farmers market and getting to know the individuals who grow your food. If you make the experience of shopping in this way enjoyable, you will be more apt to reject more convenient canned, packaged, and frozen foods in favor of the real delight you feel while browsing stalls of fresh foods nourished by the same soil you can find in your own backyard. You will soon learn what foods are in season in your area and how to prepare them. As you savor the vivid flavors of juicy ripe fruits and the hearty crunch of unprocessed vegetables, you can also take pleasure in the fact that, by eating close to the earth, you are supporting farmers in your region, connecting with your local ecosystem, discouraging those who would waste precious fossil fuels by carting produce cross-country, and helping to preserve healthy culinary traditions that have existed for centuries. Published with permission from Daily OM ******************************************* A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day Change is the characteristic of all growth. From drinking to sobriety, from dishonesty to honesty, from conflict to serenity, from childish dependence to adult responsibility — all this and infinitely more represent change for the better. Only God is unchanging; only He has all the truth there is. Do I accept the belief that lack of power was my dilemma? Have I found a power by which I can live — a Power greater than myself Today I Pray I pray that The Program will be, for me, an outline for change — for changing me. These days of transition from active addiction to sobriety, from powerlessness to power through God, may be rocky, as change can be. May my restlessness be stilled by the unchanging nature of God, in whom I place my trust. Only He is whole and perfect and predictable. Today I Will Remember I can count on my Higher Power. ******************************************* One More Day A friend is a person with whom I may be sincere. Before him, I may think aloud. – Ralph Waldo Emerson We may wonder what has happened to old friends we have lost touch with over the years. Sometimes we get so caught up in our busy lives we neglect our friendships. We can rebuild or strengthened a relationship by taking the first step in reaching out to others. Old connections can be reestablished. They were important to us at one time in our lives and can be again. We may find they have been wondering about us as well. Today, we can take up pen and paper and write to them about ourselves. Now is the time to find out what has happened to our old friends and let them know they’re in our thoughts. I will try today to establish contact with an old friend. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~ Aging ~ Those who love deeply never grow old; they may die of old age, but they die young. Benjamin Franklin I used to be afraid of getting older. I was also afraid to become friends with older people, because I would come to love them and then they would die. I could not handle unpleasant feelings (other than if I overate to stop feeling them) because the feeling of unpleasantness would totally devastate me. In working the Twelve Step program, my Higher Power has brought me great recovery in this area ... I am now able to handle the grief and sorrow that come up when I allow myself to get to know and love older people and then they die. I am now free in this area! I get to enjoy the wisdom and beauty that they have to share, from all their life experiences, and from the beautiful people they are! Another beautiful gift from my Higher Power came when I started relating to older people again. When the first one died, it really threw me, and I was very sad. But I got up the next day and had a great spiritual awakening: this person was missing and that was sad, but I looked around and saw all the other wonderful people still there in my life, with whom I got to share another day! Life suddenly became much more precious to me ... to have one more day to be with and share with someone who touches my soul! One Day at a Time . . . I enjoy myself as I become older. I allow myself to enjoy friendships with those who are older than me. I thank my Higher Power for every day and every moment of precious life! ~ Lynne ~ ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote Burn the idea into the consciousness of every man that he can get well regardless of anyone. The only condition is that he trust in God and clean house. - Pg. 98 - Working With Others Hour To Hour - Book - Quote When we feel like we can't hold on for a whole day, we get a clock and hold on for an hour. When an hour is too long, we hold on for 10 minutes. At the end of 10, do another 10, and another and another, until it's OK. Help me make it from hour to hour, or minute to minute if need be! Beyond What I See I want to know in my heart that life has meaning and purpose beyond what I see. I want to train my eye for seeing what is beautiful in life the way that a musician trains his ear. I want to know that each day is a gift, that I can't just expect it, that life is precious. I say thank you for the gift of this day - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote Forgive yourself because your Spiritual Source already has. Who are you to argue about this? T.G.I.F.: Thank God I'm Forgiven. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book The wreckage of the past is environmentally safe and bio-degradable. Time for Joy - Book - Quote I am attracted to positive people and I attract positive people to me. Today I continue to seek and find people who are positive, healthy and nurturing. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote If I don't let go, I lose my grip. - Anon. |
April 11
Daily Reflections A WORD TO DROP: "BLAME" To see how erratic emotions victimized us often took a long time. We could perceive them quickly in others, but only slowly in ourselves. First of all, we had to admit that we had many of these defects, even though such disclosures were painful and humiliating. Where other people were concerned, we had to drop the word "blame" from our speech and thought. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 47 When I did my Fourth Step, following the Big Book guidelines, I noticed that my grudge list was filled with my prejudices and my blaming others for my not being able to succeed and to live up to my potential. I also discovered I felt different because I was black. As I continued to work on the Step, I learned that I always had drunk to rid myself of those feelings. It was only when I sobered up and worked on my inventory, that I could no longer blame anyone. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day In that alcoholic world, one drink always leads to another and you can't stop till you're paralyzed. And the next morning it begins all over again. You eventually land in a hospital or jail. You lose your job. Your home is broken up. You're always in a mess. You're on the merry-go-round and you can't get off. You're in a squirrel cage and you can't get out. Am I convinced that the alcoholic world is not a pleasant place for me to live in? Meditation For The Day I must learn to accept self-discipline. I must try never to yield one point that I have already won. I must not let myself go in resentments, hates, fears, pride, lust, or gossip. Even if the discipline keeps me separated from some people who are without discipline, nevertheless I will carry on. I may have different ways and a different standard of living than some others. I may be actuated by different motives than some people. But I will try to live the way I believe God wants me to live, no matter what others say. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may be an example to others of a better way of living. I pray that I may carry on in spite of hindrances. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It "The Spiritual Angle", p. 101 How often do we sit in A.A. meetings and hear the speaker declare, "But I haven't yet got the spiritual angle." Prior to this statement, he has described a miracle of transformation which has occurred in him--not only his release from alcohol, but a complete change in his whole attitude toward life and the living of it. It is apparent to everyone else present that he has received a great gift, and that this gift is all out of proportion to anything that may be expected from simple A.A. participation. So we in the audience smile and say to ourselves, "Well, that guy is just reeling with the spiritual angle--except that he doesn't seem to know it yet!" Grapevine, July 1962 ************************************************** ********* Walk in Dry Places Helping Others____Motives It may sound selfish, but you should always help others for no reason other than your own benefit. In giving assistance, guard against posing as an idealist or even a Good Samaritan. We are not saints, and our spiritual progress is interrupted the moment we begin to act more saintly than we really are. Two things happen when we help others in the full knowledge that we are really helping only ourselves. First, we do not place the other person in a demeaning role or make him or her obligated to us. Second, we sidestep the swollen egotism that could arise if we view ourselves as rescuers. In helping others, we are only passing on the good that has come to us. Any good action will always bring rich rewards in personal well-being. People we have helped will be grateful to us when it becomes clear that we don't demand their gratitude. They will also be inspired to follow this example, which is the true AA spirit that became evident with the first Twelve Step calls. I'll look for opportunities to help others in the same way that a businessman looks for ways to increase profits. I know that I grow as a person when I help others in the right spirit. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Many of us as children, were taught to hide our pain, to act as if we had none. We look for ways to hide our pain. Alcohol and other drugs helped us do this. But the pain always returned. We were ashamed that we hurt. We thought we were the only one who hurt so badly. and, worst of all, we thought our pain meant we were bad people. Ours is a program of honesty. As we live life, there will be troubles, and there will be pain. But now we know that we don't try to hide it. If we hide our wounds, they will not heal. We will listen to others pain and ask them to listen to ours. This will help us continue our journey in recovery. Prayer for the Day: God, help me be honest about my pain. Help me see pain not as a personal defect, but as a part of life. Action for the Day: I'll share my pain with a friend, a family member, my group, or sponsor. I'll ask them to do the same with me. I'll think of pain as part of life. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning An element of recovery is learning that we deserve success, the good things that come to us, and also that pain is a reality. We have the strength to deal with that pain without medicating, and it will pass. --Dudley Martineau Many of us didn't understand the changing variables in being human. Our coping skills were at a minimum until we discovered what alcohol or pills, even food, could do for us. And then, a drink or two--or six, maybe--got us through many a lonely evening. The desire for an easy solution might still haunt us, but time, new experiences, and program friends have taught us that our past habits weren't really easy solutions. In reality, they increased our problems and led us nowhere. The Steps and the principles of the program, if applied, guarantee success, living success. We come to believe that strength enough to handle any situation is ours for the asking. And experience with these principles shows us that when we live the way our conscience dictates, the rewards are many. Every day, especially this one facing us, our choices and decisions will be many. But there is only one solution to any problem, and that's the one our higher power guides us to. The answer, the choice, always lies within, and the good life will accompany our thoughtful, reverent choices. The power of the program is mine for the taking. All of today's problems can be eased, if I choose so. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition WE AGNOSTICS We can only clear the ground a bit. If our testimony helps sweep away prejudice, enables you to think honestly, encourages you to search diligently within yourself, then, if you wish, you can join us on the Broad Highway. With this attitude you cannot fail. the consciousness of your belief is sure to come to you. p. 55 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories The Keys Of The Kingdom At twenty-five I had developed an alcoholic problem. I began making the rounds of the doctors in the hope that one of them might find some cure for my accumulating ailments, preferably something that could be removed surgically. p. 269 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Foreword This book deals with the "Twelve Steps" and the "Twelve Traditions" of Alcoholics Anonymous. It presents an explicit view of principles by which A.A. members recover and by which their Society functions. p. 15 ************************************************** ********* The person who sends out positive thoughts activates the world around him positively and draws back to himself positive results. --Norman Vincent Peale Thoughts have power. Thoughts are energy. You can make your world or break it by your thinking. --Susan Taylor When your knees knock, kneel on them. Those who are awake live in a state of constant amazement. --Buddha If you woke up breathing, congratulations! You have another chance! "We have flown the air like birds and swum the sea like fishes, but have yet to learn the simple act of walking the earth like brothers." --Martin Luther King Jr. ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation PRINCIPLES "Nothing can bring you peace but the triumph of principles. " --Ralph Waldo Emerson Slowly I am understanding what principles are in my life. I am learning to live with code of ethics that I do not always like, but I know is good for me and others. Although I do not always fully understand the "spiritual principles" of life, I know that my ongoing recovery should be based upon them. Some of the "spiritual principles" by which I try to live are: Honesty, Truth, Openness, Forgiveness, Acceptance, Humility and Hope. I am also experiencing a personal satisfaction in knowing that I am living today with a set of principles that work. They enable me to be a feeling and loving human being. Today I am beginning to feel what I always thought other people had. Today I am alive in my life. May Your principles be my lifestyle. ************************************************** ********* "God is faithful, by whom you were called into the fellowship of His Son, Jesus Christ our Lord." 1 Corinthians 1:9 For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world forces of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places. Ephesians 6:12 The peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, shall guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:7 "Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice!" Philippians 4:4 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Discover how really nice today is by taking it less for granted. Lord, thank you for my health, my friends, my abilities and the people who enrich my life and I theirs. Not one day passes without receiving wonderful blessings from our loving and generous God. Lord, may I forget the irritations that distract me from Your happiness. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today A Closed Mind "A new idea cannot be grafted onto a closed mind... Open-mindedness leads us to the very insights that have eluded us during our lives." Basic Text p. 93 We arrived in NA at the lowest point in our lives. We'd just about run out of ideas. What we needed most when we got here were new ideas, new ways of living, shared from the experience of people who'd seen those ideas work. Yet our closed minds prevented us from taking in the very ideas we needed to live. Denial keeps us from appreciating just how badly we really need new ideas and new direction. By admitting our powerlessness and recognizing how truly unmanageable our lives have become, we allow ourselves to see how much we need what NA has to offer. Self-dependence and self-will can keep us from admitting even the possibility of the existence of a Power greater than ourselves. However, when we admit the sorry state self-will has gotten us into, we open our eyes and our minds to new possibilities. When others tell us of a Power that has brought sanity to their lives, we begin to believe that such a Power may do the same for us. A tree stripped of its branches will die unless new branches can be grafted onto its trunk. In the same way, addiction stripped us' of whatever direction we had. To grow or even to survive, we must open our minds and allow new ideas to be grafted onto our lives. Just for today: I will ask my Higher Power to open my mind to the new ideas of recovery. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. Listen to your feelings. They tell you when you need to take care of yourself, like finding a friend if you feel lonely, crying if you feel sad, singing and smiling if you feel happy, and acting frisky if you feel good. --Pat Palmer When we get too much of anything--too much fun or too much work--we may feel really crummy when it's over. One way to listen to our crummy feelings is to say, "Here comes the letdown after all that fun." We can imagine a spaceship falling to earth, floating on the ocean. Coming down to earth is as much a part of the adventure as the countdown and blastoff. A letdown for us means we need to let our bodies and minds rest, just like the spaceship, bobbing around without any special direction. We need to take it easy, do nothing, put off making plans. Then we can ask God to help us let go of the crummy feelings that come along with a letdown. We can ask the spirit within us to guide us through this time of change. Then we will let down and let go. What are some things I can do to take it easy the next time I feel down? You are reading from the book Touchstones. I have learned this: it is not what one does that is wrong, but what one becomes as a consequence of it. --Oscar Wilde There are countless ways to take shortcuts in life or to grab for pleasures. We could cheat on our income taxes, excuse a food binge, or lie to a loved one about where we've been. We say, "It won't hurt anyone!" "I wouldn't do it if it weren't for the other guy." Or, "Everyone does it." But if we are to like and respect ourselves, we need to live by the rules we believe in. Whether we get caught or not isn't the point. We cannot hold values and then repeatedly justify breaking them. What does it do to us if we constantly fudge on our values? It undermines our self-esteem and damages the faith we have in ourselves. We do not expect to be perfect, but we must be accountable. If we are honest with ourselves, we admit our wrongs and reestablish our self-respect. Today, I will take care to make choices that match my values. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. An element of recovery is learning that we deserve success, the good things that come to us, and also that pain is a reality. We have the strength to deal with that pain without medicating, and it will pass. --Dudley Martineau Many of us didn't understand the changing variables in being human. Our coping skills were at a minimum until we discovered what alcohol or pills, even food, could do for us. And then, a drink or two--or six, maybe--got us through many a lonely evening. The desire for an easy solution might still haunt us, but time, new experiences, and program friends have taught us that our past habits weren't really easy solutions. In reality, they increased our problems and led us nowhere. The Steps and the principles of the program, if applied, guarantee success, living success. We come to believe that strength enough to handle any situation is ours for the asking. And experience with these principles shows us that when we live the way our conscience dictates, the rewards are many. Every day, especially this one facing us, our choices and decisions will be many. But there is only one solution to any problem, and that's the one our higher power guides us to. The answer, the choice, always lies within, and the good life will accompany our thoughtful, reverent choices. The power of the program is mine for the taking. All of today's problems can be eased, if I choose so. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Financial Goals Taking responsibility for our financial affairs will improve our self-esteem and lessen anxiety. Each of us, today, has a present set of financial circumstances. We have a certain amount of money in hand, and money due to us. We have a pile of bills that we owe. We have taxes to pay. Those are our present financial circumstances. No matter what the details are, acceptance, gratitude, and self-responsibility will lessen the stress. Each of us, today, has a financial future. There are few future aspects of our life we can control, but one part we can play to assist our future is setting goals. We don't have to obsess about our goals. We don't have to constantly watch and mark our progress toward them. But it is beneficial to think about our goals and write them down. What do we want to happen in our financial future? What financial problems would we like to solve? What bills would we like to be rid of? What would we like to be earning at the end of this year? The end of next year? Five years from now? Are we willing to work for our goals and trust our Higher Power to guide us? Pay bills on time. Contact creditors. Make arrangements. Do your best, today, to take responsibility for your finances. Set goals for the future. Then, let go of money and concentrate on loving. Taking responsibility for our financial affairs does not mean making money our focus. Taking responsibility for our finances enables us to take our focus off money. It frees us to do our work and live the life we want. We deserve to have the self-esteem and peace that accompanies financial responsibility. Today, I will take the time necessary to be responsible for myself financially. If it is time to pay bills or talk to creditors, I will do that. If it is time to set goals, I will do that. Once I have done my part, I will let the rest go. The more I let go of my own suffering and self-pity, I can see those around me with the eyes of love and compassion. I am becoming more aware of other people's pain and unhappiness today and I will reach out to them in loving ways that heal me while helping them to heal. --Ruth Fishel ******************************************* Journey To The Heart Learn to Listen to Silence Driving into Yellowstone Park, I switched off the radio. The sun was setting. The mountains on either side of the road framed my view. Snowcapped mountains, their peaks touching the clouds, reflected the peach, pink, and orange of the setting sun. The clouds were beginning to change color, the way they do at twilight. Evergreens lined the road. Some stood tall. Some stooped. Some bent, as if peeking at or beckoning the travelers on the road. The smell of pine gently filled the car. Because I’d been driving all day, I had kept the radio on to keep me alert and entertained. Now, I shut it off. As I drove, I let the silence fill the car, fill my mind, fill my soul. Before long, the colors of the sunset began to almost sing. The trees, the mountains filled me with their energy, rhythm, vibration. Certain sounds can be healing– music, the voice of a friend, the laughter of a child. But there are other times when we need to turn down the sound and listen to silence. Silence can be healing,too. As the sun set and I drove through the gates of Yellowstone Park, I realized this: the sounds of silence aren’t silent. Each creation that lives sings its own song. It takes a quiet mind, a quiet soul, a quiet heart to hear these songs. Learn to listen to silence. Listen to the world around you. And the silence will sing you a beautiful song. ******************************************* More Language Of Letting Go Let yourself change and grow There are lots of hermit crabs in the tide pools near my house. They’re interesting little creatures. A hermit crab will find a shell that fits him, put it on, and live in it. After a while, he grows and the shell no longer fits, so the crab scurries along the sea floor and finds another shell to live in. He crawls out of his first shell and into the shell that fits his new needs. This scene repeats itself again and again throughout his life. Learn a lesson from the hermit crabs. Just because a decision was right for you yesterday, doesn’t mean it meets your needs today. People grow. People change. And sometimes we have to let our safe little places go, in order to grow and change. Are you holding on to something that doesn’t work anymore, just because it’s safe and what you know? It could be a behavior pattern– such as feeling victimized in all your relationships or wearing yourself out trying to control what you can’t. Thank the lessons, people, and places of the past for all they’ve taught you. Thank your survival behaviors for helping you cope. There’s nothing wrong with feeling comfortable and safe– having lifetime friends and a career that serves us well. But don’t get so comfortable that you can’t let go and move on when it’s time. If the walls are too confining and limiting and you’re feeling stuck and bored, maybe it’s time to get out and find a new shell. There’s another shell waiting that will fit you better, but you can’t move into it until you leave this one behind. God, show me the behaviors, things, people, and places that I’ve outgrown. Then give me the faith to let go. ******************************************* Choosing Not to Be a Target Emotional Attacks by Madisyn Taylor It is important to remember that if you are being attacked emotionally, it is more than likely not about you at all. Hurtful confrontations often leave us feeling drained and confused. When someone attacks us emotionally, we may wonder what we did to rouse their anger, and we take their actions personally. We may ask ourselves what we could have done to compel them to behave or speak that way toward us. It’s important to remember that there are no real targets in an emotional attack and that it is usually a way for the attacker to redirect their uncomfortable feelings away from themselves. When people are overcome by strong emotions, like hurt or anguish, they may see themselves as victims and lash out at others as a means of protection or to make themselves feel better. You may be able to shield yourself from an emotional attack by not taking the behavior personally. First, however, it is good to cultivate a state of detachment that can provide you with some protection from the person who is attacking you. This will allow you to feel compassion for this person and remember that their beha! vior isn’t as much about you as it is about their need to vent their emotions. If you have difficulty remaining unaffected by someone’s behavior, take a moment to breathe deeply and remind yourself that you didn’t do anything wrong, and you aren’t responsible for people’s feelings. If you can see that this person is indirectly expressing a need to you—whether they are reaching out for help or wanting to be heard—you may be able to diffuse the attack by getting them to talk about what is really bothering them. You cannot control other people’s emotions, but you can control your own. If you sense yourself responding to their negativity, try not to let yourself. Keep your heart open to them, and they may let go of their defensiveness and yield to your compassion and openness. Published with permission from Daily OM ******************************************* A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day I came; I came to; I came to believe. The Program has enabled me tolearn that deep down in every man, woman and child is the fundamental idea of a God. It may be obscured by pomp, by calamity, by worship of other things, but in some form or other it is there. For faith in a Power greater than ourselves, and miraculous demonstrations of the Power in human lives are facts as old as man himself. How well do I share my free gifts? Today I Pray I pray that I may continue to look for — and find — that Godliness that is in me and in every other person, no matter how it is obscured. May I be aware that the consciousness of a Higher Power has been present in man since he was first given the power to reason, no matter what name he gave to it or how he sought to reach it. May my own faith in a Higher Power be reinforced by the experience of all mankind — and by the working of His gracious miracles in my own life. Today I Will Remember God is in us all. ******************************************* One More Day When you get into a tight place, and everything goes against you, till it seems as though you could not hold on a moment longer, never give up then, for that is just the place and time that the tide will turn. – Harriet Beecher Stowe Sometimes we push ourselves too fast, too far, too often. Even though we are cognizant of that exact moment when we just cannot, physically or emotionally, go on any longer, we still persevere. When we finally do acknowledge that again we have gone too far, it may be time to take a nap or exercise to release our emotions. Or we may choose to be with friends or family. We begin to understand that the bad times pass. If we can just make it through one more moment, then the tables will turn in our favor. I am able to make it through even the hardest hard day. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~ Meditation ~ When you are with others, be with them wholeheartedly. But when you are by yourself, be alone with God. Paramahansa Yogananda When I pray to the God of my understanding, I am able to share my thoughts, to vent my feelings, to express my gratitude. But it isn't enough for me to speak to God. I also need to listen. That's where meditation comes in. Sometimes I select a passage from program literature to meditate on. I read the passage, and then sit quietly and allow my Higher Power to help me make connections between what I've read and the life I'm leading. Other times, I will pick a word or phrase, like "love" or "peace" and repeat it, over and over, in my mind. I allow myself to align with the feeling of that word. I may picture a serene place, and mentally go there, to rest and regroup from the pressures of the day. I also will sometimes sit quietly, "in the silence," as the Quakers say. I listen to my breath moving in and out of my body, and I allow my Higher Power to speak to my heart. No matter which meditation practice I select, the important thing for me is to do it faithfully, every day, and to totally give myself to it. I figure, if God can give to me, then I can give a little of myself back to the One who has blessed me with this program. One Day at a Time . . . I will spend some quiet time alone with my Higher Power, and listen to that still, small voice within. ~ Jeff ~ ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote Helping others is the foundation stone of your recovery. - Pg. 97 - Working With Others Hour To Hour - Book - Quote To want a fix, pill, drink, smoke, or snort is not bad, it is a perfectly normal state of being for an addict. But each hour we stay clean eventually makes a day. Each day brings us closer to health of body, mind, and spirit. Eventually 'craving' our chemicals will not be normal, but a thing of our diseased past. Let me know that the state of craving my drug of choice will one day be replaced with feeling my true emotions. I Thank You God For most this amazing day, for the leafy, greenly spirits of trees, and everything which is infinite, which is beautiful, which is yes. I who have died am alive again today and this is the sun's birthday. - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote Sobriety is a grant, not a gift. A gift is something we get to keep forever. A grant is contingent on us doing something to keep it. I work steps because my recovery is 'contingent on the maintenance of {my} spiritual program.' (P 85, AA Book) "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Enforce the 'Respect-me rules' Time for Joy - Book - Quote The more I let go of my own suffering and self-pity, I can see those around me with the eyes of love and compassion. I am becoming more aware of other people's pain and unhappiness today and I will reach out to them in loving ways that heal me while helping them to heal. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote I remember that first drink and feeling so surprised and amazed and delighted. And I think of how many alcoholics are dying right now trying somehow, some way to re-create that moment. - Charlie C. |
April 12
Daily Reflections GIVING UP INSANITY . . . where alcohol has been involved, we have been strangely insane. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 38 Alcoholism required me to drink, whether I wanted to or not. Insanity dominated my life and was the essence of my disease. It robbed me of the freedom of choice over drinking and, therefore, robbed me of all other choices. When I drank, I was unable to make effective choices in any part of my life and life became unmanageable. I ask God to help me understand and accept the full meaning of the disease of alcoholism. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day This sober world is a pleasant place for an alcoholic to live in. Once you've gotten out of your alcoholic fog, you find that the world looks good. You find real friends in A.A. You get a job. You feel good in the morning. You eat a good breakfast and you do a good day's work at home or outside. And your family loves you and welcomes you because you're sober. Am I convinced that this sober world is a pleasant place for an alcoholic to live in? Meditation For The Day Our need is God's opportunity. First we must recognize our need. Often this means helplessness before some weakness or sickness and an admission of our need for help. Next comes faith in the power of God's spirit, available to us to meet that need. Before any need can be met, our faith must find expression. That expression of faith is all God needs to manifest His power in our lives. Faith is the key that unlocks the storehouse of God's resources. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may first admit my needs. I pray that then I may have faith that God will meet those needs, in the way which is best for me. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Healing Talk, p. 102 When we consult an A.A. friend, we should not be reluctant to remind him of our need for full privacy. Intimate communication is normally so free and easy among us that an A.A. adviser may sometimes forget when we expect him to remain silent. The protective sanctity of this most healing of human relations ought never be violated. Such privileged communications have priceless advantages. We find in them the perfect opportunity to be as honest as we know how to be. We do not have to think of the possibility of damage to other people, nor need we fear ridicule or condemnation. Here, too, we have the best possible chance of spotting self-deception. Grapevine, August 1961 ************************************************** ********* Walk in Dry Places Beating Depression_____ Emotional Fortitude If you're seeking a lively meeting discussion topic, bring up depression. It's so closely tied to alcoholism that some people even think alcoholics are attempting to "treat" depression when they drink. Others feel that depression shows they're not "working" the program. Overcoming depression is a monumental undertaking, but that doesn't mean it cannot be done. The dearly mistake is that believe your circumstances are so hopeless that there's no solution. Sometimes, as AA co-founder Bill Wilson contended (based on personal experience), depression actually corrects itself in time. Stay sober, live rightly, keep physically and mentally active, and in time some depressive mood swings will ease. Even more serious clinical depression can be treated. It's human to be temporarily depressed about a terrible failure or setback. The Twelve Steps are tools for coping with unpleasant situations, but we still might feel bad about tem for a time. The really good news is that enough fortitude will see us through for the long term. We have much experience to show that this is true. Whether today's mood is up or down, I'll hold to the view that the Twelve Steps will help me defeat mental depression in time. My Higher Power assures me that joy and peace are my rightful state of mind. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple Life I love you, all is groovy.---Paul Simon Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me let go of my fears and enjoy life. I haven't always known how to enjoy life, but Working the Twelve Steps is more than recovery from alcohol or other drug addiction. It's also about how to enjoy life. Our illness pulled us toward death. Our spirits were dying, and maybe our bodies were dying. Now our spirits are coming to life. We feel more alive than ever before. Our feelings are coming alive. We feel hope and faith, love, and joy, and even hurt and fear. We notice the sunshine as well as the clouds. We know life needs both sunshine and rain, both joy and pain. We are alive. You can teach me. All life is from You, so teach me to be free in Your light and love. Action for the Day: Right now, I can think of at least three things in life that make me feel like sunshine. What are they? ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Make yourself a blessing to someone. Your kind smile or pat on the back just might pull someone back from the edge. --Carmelia Elliott Someone will be helped today by our kindness. Compassionate attention assures others that they do matter, and every one of us needs that reassurance occasionally. The program has given us the vehicle for giving and seeking the help we need--it's sponsorship. Not all of the people we encounter share our program, however. Sponsorship as we know it isn't a reality in their lives. Offering words of encouragement to them, or a willing ear, can be unexpected gifts. They will be deeply appreciated. The real gift, though, is to ourselves. Helping someone in need benefits the helper even more. Our own closeness to God and thus assurance about our own being is strengthened each time we do God's work--each time we do what our hearts direct. We are healed in our healing of others. God speaks to us through our words to others. Our own well-being is enhanced each time we put someone else's well-being first. We're all on a trip, following different road maps, but to the same destination. I will be ready to lend a helping hand to a troubled traveler today. It will breathe new life into my own trip. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition WE AGNOSTICS In this book you will read the experience of a man who thought he was an atheist. His story is so interesting that some of it should be told now. His change of heart was dramatic, convincing, and moving. Our friend was a minister’s son. He attended church school, where he became rebellious at what he thought an overdose of religious education. For years thereafter he was dogged by trouble and frustration. Business failure, insanity, fatal illness, suicide—these calamities in his immediate family embittered and depressed him. Post-war disillusionment, ever more serious alcoholism, impending mental and physical collapse, brought him to the point to self-destruction. pp. 55-56 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories The Keys Of The Kingdom Of course the doctors found nothing. Just an unstable woman, undisciplined, poorly adjusted, and filled with nameless fears. Most of them prescribed sedatives and advised rest and moderation p. 269 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Foreword A.A.'s Twelve Traditions apply to the life of the Fellowship itself. They outline the means by which A.A. maintains its unity and relates itself to the world about it, the way it lives and grows. p. 15 ************************************************** ********* What matters is what's in our hearts. "The reason angels can fly is that they take themselves so lightly," G. K. Chesterton once wrote: Once you stop taking yourself so seriously and let go of the gravity of all that you do, you can learn to fly, too. God, help me lighten up. --Melody Beattie "Humility leads to strength and not to weakness. It is the highest form of self-respect to admit mistakes and to make amends for them." --John (Jay) McCloy Learning is an upward, ever-evolving process. We will never reach the point where we've learned all we need to know. Every aspect of life contains lessons. We can choose to discard them or to embrace them. Lessons embraced lead to wisdom. --Mary Manin Morrissey We can stop waiting for others to give us what we need and take responsibility for ourselves. When we do, the gates to freedom will swing wide. Walk through. --Melody Beattie Believe and the healing will come. --Gary Barnes Each of us is a unique expression of God's beauty. --Jane F. Maxwell ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation SUFFERING "Every man, on the foundation of his own sufferings and joys, builds for all. " --Albert Camus In my pain I am able to reach out to others. When I share my pain, I not only understand but I am understood. It is my pain and suffering that unites me with others. Other people become a part of my life and are involved in who I am. Through my shared feelings, other people begin to share. Trust develops across this bridge of understanding. Feelings unite the world. Lord, You created us in ONENESS - help us in our struggle to unite. ************************************************** ********* Beloved, let us love one another: for love is of God; and every one that loveth is born of God, and knoweth God. 1 John 4:7 "And he said: "I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven." Matthew 18:3 Pleasant words are a honeycomb sweet to the soul and healing to the bones. Proverbs 16:24 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Forget the hurts and unkindnesses of all yesterdays so that today you will have room to be joyful and at peace. Lord, bless me with the ability to let go of that which causes me pain so that I may not miss the great joys that today will bring. Small acts of kindness make lasting memories. Lord, help me to remember that it is a privilege to pause for those moment in which I can really make a difference. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today The Big Picture "All spiritual awakenings have some things in common. Common elements include an end to loneliness and a sense of direction in our lives." Basic Text p. 48 Some kinds of spiritual experiences take place when we confront something larger than we are. We suspect that forces beyond our understanding are operating. We see a fleeting glimpse of the big picture and find humility in that moment. Our journey through the Twelve Steps will bring about a spiritual experience of the same nature, only more profound and lasting. We undergo a continual process of ego-deflation, while at the same time we become more conscious of the larger perspective. Our view of the world expands to the point where we no longer possess an exaggerated sense of our own importance. Through our new awareness, we no longer feel isolated from the rest of the human race. We may not understand why the world is the way it is or why people sometimes treat one another so savagely. But we do understand suffering and, in recovery, we can do our best to alleviate it. When our individual contribution is combined with others, we become an essential part of a grand design. We are connected at last. Just for today: I am but one person in the entire scheme of things. I humbly accept my place in the big picture. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. I come into the peace of wild things who do not tax their lives with forethought of grief. --Wendell Berry Blessed are all birds and animals, the wildest beasts, and, yes, all serpents, too, for they live in nature, in a state of natural grace. They live beyond the rules of evil and good. Their instincts are obedient only to the laws of survival, growth, and health. And as their lives unfurl in obedience to these laws, they suffer no shame, regret, or sin. Nor do they curse their failures, or themselves. We can learn much from them. They harbor no evil toward one another, and they trust their own inner sense of how to live, and that their Higher Power makes sure everything which befalls them is for the best. Yes, they are blessed, and so are we, the highest animal. What guilt can I free myself from today, just by letting go? You are reading from the book Touchstones. Anyone who lives art knows that psychoanalysis has no monopoly on the power to heal.... Art and poetry have always been altering our ways of sensing and feeling - that is to say, altering the human body. --Norman 0. Brown A man can lead a healing life on many levels. On one level, many of us have turned to healing professionals for help. That may strengthen our program and be very beneficial for many of our problems. Relationships heal when they are loving, affirming, reliable, committed, and loyal. Nature heals: a tree, a walk through tall grass, a dry seedpod, or a potted plant gives life when we turn in its direction. Beauty heals: music, a poem, a novel, or a picture may move us to another plane and teach us about life. Meditation heals: solitude, quiet relaxation, prayer, and cosmic consciousness bring an inner peace. Laughter heals. Physical activity heals. Doing something for others helps us. At the basic level, accepting ourselves as lovable men, just as we are, is the foundation for all healing. The forces for renewal and wholeness are varied. May I reach out to them and be healed by them. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Make yourself a blessing to someone. Your kind smile or pat on the back just might pull someone back from the edge. --Carmelia Elliott Someone will be helped today by our kindness. Compassionate attention assures others that they do matter, and every one of us needs that reassurance occasionally. The program has given us the vehicle for giving and seeking the help we need--it's sponsorship. Not all of the people we encounter share our program, however. Sponsorship as we know it isn't a reality in their lives. Offering words of encouragement to them, or a willing ear, can be unexpected gifts. They will be deeply appreciated. The real gift, though, is to ourselves. Helping someone in need benefits the helper even more. Our own closeness to God and thus assurance about our own being is strengthened each time we do God's work--each time we do what our hearts direct. We are healed in our healing of others. God speaks to us through our words to others. Our own well-being is enhanced each time we put someone else's well-being first. We're all on a trip, following different road maps, but to the same destination. I will be ready to lend a helping hand to a troubled traveler today. It will breathe new life into my own trip. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Letting Go of Fear Picture yourself swimming floating - peacefully down a gentle stream. All you need to do is breathe, relax, and go with the flow. Suddenly, you become conscious of your situation. Frightened, overwhelmed with what ifs? your body tenses. You begin to thrash around, frantically looking for something to grab on to. You panic so hard you start to go under. Then you remember - you're working too hard at this. You don't need to panic. All you need to do is breathe, relax, and go with the flow. You wont drown. Panic is our great enemy. We don't need to become desperate. If overwhelming problems appear in our life, we need to stop struggling. We can tread water for a bit, until our equilibrium returns. Then we can go back to floating peacefully down the gentle stream. It is our stream. It is a safe stream. Our course has been charted. All is well. Today, I will relax, breathe, and go with the flow. Today I know that every time I inhale, I am breathing in powerful healing energy. And every time I exhale I am letting go. I am letting go of all anxiety and stress, all negativity that is standing in the way of my feeling good about myself. --Ruth Fishel ******************************************* Journey To The Heart Open Yourself to the Wealth of the Universe We all have sources we turn to for support. We may turn to special people in our lives– family members, friends, a lover. We may turn to nature– the mountains, trees, oceans, rivers, sun, moon, and stars. But we no longer have to limit ourselves to just one person, one source for love, energy, comfort, and guidance. Certain people come into our lives for a short while to help us through particular times. Other people come to stay for a longer time. Sometimes we love people and are so deeply committed to them that they will be sources of energy and love for us, and we for them, for most of our lives. That’s good. That’s how it should be. But while it’s good to have people who are special sources of support for us, allowing one person to be our sole support can mean trouble. We may begin to drain that person. We may become overly dependent. He or she may move away from us. Or we may become angry, as we usually do, at whomever or whatever we are dependent on. For many reasons, we may find ourselves in conflict with the one we have deemed our source. Something may happen that causes our source to no longer be available to us. It’s important to be conscious of what our needs are and to get our needs met. But it’s also important not to make one person responsible for doing that. Open to a larger, more abundant source. That source is God. And God’s supply is the universe. When we look to God and the universe, we open ourselves to a never-ending supply of what we need– love, energy, teaching, support, information, guidance, and nurturing. Certain people and places may help us along our way, but God is our source for love. ******************************************* More Language Of Letting Go Is it what you really want? “Are you still in that relationship?” I asked a friend one day. “If I were really sick, I could be,” my friend said. “But I’ve decided not to do that to myself anymore.” Sometimes, a door is open. We can walk through it and into that room. We can stay there as long as we want and as long as we can stand being in that room. Many of us have learned to take care of ourselves so well that we can be in extremely uncomfortable situations and still comfortably take care of ourselves. The question then becomes not “Can I?” but, “Do I want to?” There are many situations in life where we can insist on having our will and way, sometimes for an extended period of time. Stubbornness and persistence can be good qualities. We can stay with a thing until we learn it well. But we can also take that too far and stick with a thing– a project or relationship– when other weaker and wiser souls might have given up. Instead of asking yourself if you can, ask yourself something different. If you’ve been hanging in there, trying harder, and diligently taking care of yourself, back off. Stop asking yourself if you’re good enough to handle the situation. Ask yourself if the situation is good for you. God, help me take the time to ask myself, “Is this what I really want?” ******************************************* Creative Cuts Editing Your Life by Madisyn Taylor Cutting out what isn't working in your life is a bold first step to creating the life that does work for you. Our lives can be compared to an ongoing movie script over which we have complete creative control. Within us lies the power to examine what works or isn’t working in our lives and make “edits” to our life’s script, accordingly. Choosing to actively edit your life can be incredibly empowering. As you evolve, you have the choice to accept the script you’ve written thus far or edit it so you can create a life that fulfills you. You can cut out from your life’s script what is no longer working for you. Acknowledging that you are responsible for the experience you create gives you the ability to create the life you’ve always longed for. Granted, editing your real life isn’t always as easy as erasing a line of text. If you’ve carried emotional baggage or held on to an unhealthy relationship for a long time, these may be difficult to edit out. But when you do cut out what isn’t working from your life, you’ll feel lighter and more alive. Editing out activities that you find stressful, disassociating yourself from people that drain your energy, and letting go of your emotional baggage are all beneficial cuts you can make. In the empty spaces that are left behind, you can add in anything you like. Just as you have the power to edit out negative situations or beliefs that you no longer wish to have as part of your life, you can now include the kinds of positive experiences, people, and beliefs that you would like to fill your life with. The manifestation of these thoughts and images as realities in your life will inevitably follow. As you make changes to your life, you can also add in the bits where you choose mo! re intimate, healthier relationships, seek out adventure over tedium, and are no longer negatively impacted by old experiences. To begin editing your life, simply think about your positive and negative experiences. When you determine what parts of your life are no longer serving you, make the commitment to remove them – though, it is important to remember that there is no proper timing or way to do this, and patience and compassion for yourself are always important during this process. Then, ask yourself what has brought you profound bliss and consider how you can make those experiences and beliefs part of your life now. With a little editing, you’ll be able to clear out what is no longer serving you and make room in your life for more happiness, love, and wisdom. Published with permission from Daily OM ******************************************* A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day If we attempt to understand rather than to be understood, we can more quickly assure a newcomer that we have no desire to convince anyone that there is only one way by which faith can be acquired. All of us, whatever our race, creed, color or ethnic heritage are the children of a living Creator, which whom we may form a relationship upon simple and understandable terms — as soon as we are willing and honest enough to try. Do I know the difference between sympathy and empathy? Can I put myself in the newcomer’s shoes? Today I Pray May I try to love all humanity as children of a living God. May I respect the different ways through which they find and worship Him. May I respect the different ways through which they find and worship Him. May I never be so rigid as to discount another’s path to God or so insensitive that I use the fellowship of the group as a preaching ground to extol my religion beliefs as the only way. I can only know what works for me. Today I Will Remember We are all children of God. ******************************************* One More Day A crisis event often explodes the illusions that … anchor our lives. – Robert Veninga Chronic illness an become so common-place for us that we lull ourselves into thinking we’ve become the best we can be and believing we can handle everything. When another crisis occurs — family problems, financial setbacks, or loss of friends — we may stubbornly try to fix the situation, only to be rewarded with self-pity or anger or sadness. In time, we usually realize that we don’t have to carry every burden or solve every problem. sometimes there is no answer other than acceptance of a situation as being unchangeable. What can be changed is our reaction to this fact. We can, as we have before, build our lives around the new situation. We can allow ourselves to grow into a greater maturity. Every day, every experience is an opportunity to grow. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~ Recovery ~ I'm sick and tired of being sick and tired. Fannie Lou Hamer I used to get so disgusted with myself. I was sick and tired of trying to lose weight because I always failed. I had lost weight several times but I would still feel ugly, fat and unacceptable to everybody else. The sickness and tiredness remained because I had not changed anything inside my head, just my body size! My past was still there and it continued to haunt me, and I was filled with the guilt and shame of the past. A friend told me about this great program where I could discover what was really making me sick and how I could recover. She said, "You will have someone with you to help continually 24 hours a day, seven days a week." "How can this be?" I asked. She said, "Well, this wonderful program helps you recover by teaching you what really has been bothering you. Maybe it's things you are sorry you did or didn't do in the past, people you've hurt or who have hurt you." "Do I need to leave home or pay a lot of money?" I asked. She said, "No. You work it at home, at work and everywhere you go. The cost is nothing, except a desire to stop eating compulsively. Your continual help is your Higher Power and he never goes to sleep, he listens and helps you when you ask for his help." "Wow, you mean I don't have to be sick and tired any more?" "That's right and all it takes is Twelve small but important Steps, a lot of love, hugs, acceptance, trust and sincere honesty. It's easy and works as long as you work it." One Day at a Time . . . I don't need to be sick and tired of myself any more. I have a wonderful program with a lot of tools, friends and my Higher Power to help me. I can achieve recovery one day at a time ... it's a matter of progress, not perfection. ~ Jeanette ~ |
April 13
Daily Reflections THE FALSE COMFORT OF SELF-PITY Self-pity is one of the most unhappy and consuming defects that we know. It is a bar to all spiritual progress and can cut off all effective communication with our fellows because of its inordinate demands for attention and sympathy. It is a maudlin form of martyrdom, which we can ill afford. AS BILL SEES IT, p. 238 The false comfort of self-pity screens me from reality only momentarily and then demands, like a drug, that I take an ever bigger dose. If I succumb to this it could lead to a relapse into drinking. What can I do? One certain antidote is to turn my attention, however slightly at first, toward others who are genuinely less fortunate than I, preferably other alcoholics. In the same degree that I actively demonstrate my empathy with them, I will lessen my own exaggerated suffering. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day Having found my way into this new world by the grace of God and the help of A.A., am I going to take that first drink, when I know that just one drink will change my whole world? Am I deliberately going back to the suffering of that alcoholic world? Or am I going to hang onto the happiness of this sober world? Is there any doubt about the answer? With God's help, am I going to hang onto AA. with both hands? Meditation For The Day I will try to make the world better and happier by my presence in it. I will try to help other people find the way God wants them to live. I will try to be on the side of good, in the stream of righteousness, where all things work for good. I will do my duty persistently and faithfully, not sparing myself. I will be gentle with all people. I will try to see other people's difficulty and help them to correct it. I will always pray to God to act as interpreter between me and the other person. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may live in the spirit of prayer. I pray that I may depend on God for the strength I need to help me to do my part in making the world a better place. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Principle Before Expediency, p. 103 Most of us thought good character was desirable. Obviously, good character was something one needed to get on with the business of being self-satisfied. With a proper display of honesty and morality, we'd stand a better chance of getting what we really wanted. But whenever we had to choose between character and comfort, character-building was lost in the dust of our chase after what we thought was happiness. Seldom did we look at character-building as something desirable in itself. We never thought of making honesty, tolerance, and true love of man and God the daily basis of living. << << << >> >> >> How to translate a right mental conviction into a right emotional result, and so into easy, happy and good living, is the problem of life itself. 1. 12 & 12, pp. 71-72 2. Grapevine, January 1958 ************************************************** ********* Walk in Dry Places No Conditional Sobriety Admission of Powerlessness Sobriety in AA is unconditional. This means that there’s never been a reason for drinking, no matter how bad our circumstances may become. As the AA pioneers were fond of saying, “THERE’S NOTHING THAT DRINKING WON'T MAKE WORSE.” How do we know if we've been setting conditions on sobriety? It’s revealed to us in our own thinking. If we believe, for example, that a certain setback such as the ending of a relationship is just cause for drinking, we have made our sobriety conditional. In such cases, what we need to do is clear up our own thinking on the subject. Maybe further inventory is needed, or perhaps we should let ourselves learn from the experience of others. Self-honesty is also important in getting priorities in order. The decision to choose unconditional sobriety brings additional benefits in helping us to organize our lives. Once we completely understand that sobriety is all-important, it becomes easier to make other decisions that bear on keeping sober. We find ourselves choosing the ideas and activities that enhance sobriety, while rejecting other things that could threaten it. I’ll never waver in a moment from my relief that I must continue to seek sobriety…… unconditionally. There is nothing that could ever justify my taking a drink. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple No labor, however humble, is dishonoring.---The Talmud Work is good for the heart. Work is good for our minds. It can give us something to focus on besides ourselves. Labor doesn't just mean having a job. It may mean planting a garden or helping a friend. It certainly means working our program. Hopefully, it's a labor of love. We can get into trouble if we have to much time on our hands. We can turn it into mischief or self-pity. We can get bored. Being bored is a matter of choice. We'll never be bored if we ask ourselves, "How can I make this world a better place?" We can turn our answers into action. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, teach me to use my time wisely. Help me be well-balanced between labor and fun. I need both. Action for the Day: I'll list five ways that labor and fun can help me get closer to my Higher Power. And I'll look for people and things to fill my time in positive ways. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning The world is a wheel always turning. Those who are high go down low, and those who've been low go up higher. --Anzia Yezierska Everything changes. Nothing stays the same. And letting go of the way things are, anticipating instead what they might become, frees us to live each moment more fully. Time marches on, and our destiny marches with it. There is purpose in how our lives unfold, the ups and downs serve our growth. We must neither resent the doldrums nor savor too long the elation. Giving too much attention to either state interferes with our awareness of the present. And the present has come to teach us. We must move with time. We must focus our attention on the moment and accept whatever feelings each experience elicits. Emotional maturity is accepting our feelings and letting them go and facing instead the next moment with fresh receptivity. Our lessons are many, and they accompany the lows as well as the highs. We can be grateful for both. The program has taught us freedom from lingering lows. It has given us the tools to move confidently forward, trusting that all is well. Nothing lasts forever, and within each struggle is the opportunity for real growth. The highs will pass away, just as will the lows. They visit us purposefully. I will give them their freedom and find mine as well. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition WE AGNOSTICS One night, when confined in a hospital, he was approached by an alcoholic who had known a spiritual experience. Our friend’s gorge rose as he bitterly cried out: “If there is a God, He certainly hasn’t done anything for me!” But later, alone in his room, he asked himself this question: “Is it possible that all the religious people I have known are wrong?” While pondering the answer he felt as though he lived in hell. Then, like a thunderbolt, a great thought came. It crowded out all else: “Who are you to say there is no God?” This man recounts that he tumbled out of bed to his knees. In a few seconds he was overwhelmed by a conviction of the Presence of God. It poured over and through him with the certainty and majesty of a great tide at flood. The barriers he had built through the years were swept away. He stood in the Presence of Infinite Power and Love. He had stepped from bridge to shore. For the first time, he lived in conscious companionship with his Creator. Thus was our friend’s cornerstone fixed in place. No later vicissitude has shaken it. His alcoholic problem was taken away. That very night, years ago, it disappeared. Save for a few brief moments of temptation the though of drink has never returned; and at such times a great revulsion has risen up in him. Seemingly he could not drink even if he would. God had restored his sanity. pp. 56-57 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories The Keys Of The Kingdom This worldly lady helped to develop A.A. in Chicago and thus passed her keys to many. Between the ages of twenty-five and thirty, I tried everything. I moved a thousand miles away from home to Chicago and a new environment. I studied art; I desperately endeavored to create an interest in many things, in a new place among new people. Nothing worked. My drinking habits increased in spite of my struggle for control. I tried the beer diet, the wine diet, timing, measuring, and spacing of drinks. I tried them mixed, unmixed, drinking only when happy, only when depressed. And still, by the time I was thirty years old, I was being pushed around by a compulsion to drink that was completely beyond my control. I couldn't stop drinking. I would hang on to sobriety for short intervals, but always there would come the tide of an overpowering necessity to drink, and, as I was engulfed in it, I felt such a sense of panic that I really believed I would die if I didn't get that drink inside. pp. 269-270 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Foreword Though the essays which follow were written mainly for members, it is thought by many of A.A.'s friends that these pieces might arouse interest and find application outside A.A. itself. p. 15 ************************************************** ********* According to my experience, the principal characteristic of genuine happiness is peace, inner peace. --His Holiness the Dalai Lama God, help me remember to be peaceful first, no matter what situation I face. --Melody Beattie "When human beings stand by one another, testify to their faith, and witness each other's pain, miracles happen. If we are loved enough, we are emotionally healed and spiritually made whole." --Marianne Williamson God, teach me to let go of worry about money. --Melody Beattie "Don't go through life, GROW through life." --Eric Butterworth Let those whom you care about know how much you appreciate them, right now! Look for opportunities to speak words that help and heal. --Roy Shaver ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation REALITY "I tend to be suspicious of people whose love of animals is exaggerated; they are often frustrated in their relationship with humans." --Yila (Camilla Koffler) Anything can be used to avoid dealing with reality. People can use alcohol, food, drugs, people, sex, gambling - and yes, even animals - to avoid dealing with their loneliness and feelings of isolation. The key to addiction is to be found in the obsessive and compulsive behavior patterns that stop us from reaching our full potential as human beings. We cannot relax with who we are because of our exaggerated and painful lifestyles. We cannot truly love ourselves because of our obsession with the "it" that seems to be controlling us. At some point we need to see the obsession and begin to talk about it. In order for me to be a spiritual person I must free myself from compulsive attitudes. God, I meditate on the "comfortableness" of freedom. ************************************************** ********* "From his fullness we have all received, grace upon grace." John 1:16 "When they call to me, I will answer them; I will be with them in trouble, I will rescue them and honor them." Psalm 91:15 "Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven." Luke 6:37 I lift up my eyes to the hills--where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth. Psalm 121:1-2 Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven. Matthew 5:16 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Grow and learn from every situation no matter how insignificant because to stand still is really going backwards. Lord, may my spirit always remain young and vibrant and my enthusiasm for each new day remain alive. It is the optimist that opens new doors and takes advantage of even the smallest of life's opportunities. Lord, may my spirit shine and my eyes be open so that I may discover all that life offers. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today People - Pleasing "...approval-seeking behavior carried us further into our addiction..." Basic Text p. 14 When others approve of what we do or say, we feel good; when they disapprove, we feel bad. Their opinions of us, and how those opinions make us feel, can have positive value. By making us feel good about steering a straight course, they encourage us to continue doing so. "People-pleasing" is something else entirely. We "people-please" when we do things, right or wrong, solely to gain another person's approval. Low self-esteem can make us think we need someone else's approval to feel okay about ourselves. We do whatever we think it will take to make them tell us we're okay We feel good for awhile. Then we start hurting. In trying to please another person, we've diminished ourselves and our values. We realize that the approval of others will not fill the emptiness inside us. The inner satisfaction we seek can be found in doing the right things for the right reasons. We break the people-pleasing cycle when we stop acting merely to gain others' approval and start acting on our Higher Power's will for us. When we do, we may be pleasantly surprised to find that the people who really count in our lives will approve all the more of our behavior. Most importantly, though, we will approve of ourselves. Just for today: Higher Power, help me live in accordance with spiritual principles. Only then can I approve of myself. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. If I have freedom in my life, And in my soul am free, Angels alone that soar above Enjoy such liberty. --Richard Lovelace When a cow decides to stop nursing her calf, she isn't rejecting it. She knows it's time for the calf to be on its own. Although the calf might feel rejected and puzzled at first, it soon adapts to its new independence and freedom. When we feel rejected, it's useful to remember that whatever has caused us to feel this way might have nothing to do with us. It might be a reflection of what's happening with someone else, or just the end of a natural stage in life, as with the calf. When we understand that others' actions toward us come from their own feelings, and that we don't cause their feelings any more than they control ours, we can free ourselves from a little bit of fear and self-hate. We can see what seems to be rejection as an open door, with our freedom on the other side. What rejections have set me free? You are reading from the book Touchstones. Just be what you are and speak from your guts and heart - it's all a man has. --Hubert Humphrey Some of us have doubted our inner voice so completely that we abandoned it totally. Many of us have discovered in recovery that by our denial we had violated our inner voice with lies, even to ourselves. Now we question whether we can trust our instincts, and we may not know what we feel. Masculine spiritual recovery is a return to our guts and our heart. Standing up and speaking from our hearts may be difficult at times, but our self-respect rises as we do. That is where we go for our final decision-making. We develop better reception for the inner voice as we live this program. We accept that we are never absolutely right. We continue with humility, knowing we may be wrong and listening to others and our Higher Power. Yet we must live with our choices. I will seek the courage to be faithful to my own instincts. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. It seems to me that I have always been waiting for something better - sometimes to see the best I had snatched from me. --Dorothy Reed Mendenhall Gratitude for what is prepares us for the blessings just around the corner. What is so necessary to understand is that our wait for what's around the corner closes our eyes to the joys of the present moment. We have only the 24 hours ahead of us. In fact, all we can be certain of having is the moment we are presently experiencing. And it is a gift to be enjoyed. There is no better gift just right for us than this moment, at this time. We can, each of us, look back on former days, realizing that we learned too late the value of a friend or an experience. Both are now gone. With practice and a commitment to ourselves, we can learn to reap the benefits of today, hour by hour. When we detach from the present and wait for tomorrow, or next week, or look to next year, we are stunting our spiritual growth. Life can only bless us now, one breath at a time. I can live in the present if I choose to. Gentle reminders are often necessary, however. I will step into my life, today. It can become a habit, one I will never want to break. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Communication Part of owning our power is learning to communicate clearly, directly, and assertively. We don't have to beat around the bush in our conversations to control the reactions of others. Guilt producing comments only produce guilt. We don't have to fix or take care of people with our words; we cant expect others to take care of us with words either. We can settle for being heard and accepted. And we can respectfully listen to what others have to say. Hinting at what we need doesn't work. Others cant read our mind, and they're likely to resent our indirectness. The best way to take responsibility for what we want is to ask for it directly. And, we can insist on directness from others. If we need to say no to a particular request, we can. If someone is trying to control us through a conversation, we can refuse to participate. Acknowledging feelings such as disappointment or anger directly, instead of making others guess at our feelings or having our feelings come out in other ways, is part of responsible communication. If we don't know what we want to say, we can say that too. We can ask for information and use words to forge a closer connection, but we don't have to take people around the block with our conversations. We don't have to listen to, or participate in, nonsense. We can say what we want and stop when were done. Today, I will communicate clearly and directly in my conversations with others. I will strive to avoid manipulative, indirect, or guilt producing statements. I can be tactful and gentle whenever possible. And I can be assertive if necessary. It is beautiful to know that I am the creator of how I think and feel today, that I can choose my now. Today I choose to feel joy and I will do all that I have to do to make that possible. --Ruth Fishel ******************************************* Journey To The Heart Give Freely of What You’ve Been Given Learning not to overcare, overgive, and overdo are the lessons of the past. We have learned them, learned them well. There was a time when we needed to monitor our giving because we were giving compulsively, almost addictively, with no thought to what felt right in our heart, with no understanding of loving ourselves. But that was yesterday. This is now. We can trust ourselves to know when it’s time to stop or when our giving has become destructive. We can trust ourselves to know when it’s not our job to give, because now we are connected to ourselves, listening to ourselves, on track. Give freely of your time, your heart, your joy, your wisdom. Share your experiences, your strength, your hope. Share your weaknesses as well as your strengths. Share your money, your gifts, your laughter. Share your hope. Share yourself. Give freely of what you’ve been given, and the universe will provide you with exactly what you need. Give freely and the universe will give freely to you. ******************************************* More Language Of Letting Go Let yourself make mistakes There are times we don’t know which way to proceed or what to do next. We can become so blocked and stymied trying to figure it out that we just sit and spin our wheels. In those situations, the solution may involve making some choice– even if it turns out to be the wrong one. Ideally, we can meditate on our choices and one way will feel right and clear, and the other won’t. But in those times when we can’t get clear, sometimes we have to give things a try. Take that job. Move into a condo. Date that woman. If it’s a mistake, you can correct it as honestly, quickly, and humbly as you can. You don’t have to live life as perfectly as you think. Sometimes it takes making a mistake in order for us to get clear. God, help me let go of perfectionism. Help me give myself permission to live. ******************************************* Getting Unstuck From Getting Unstuck On-line Course by Pema Chodron The following is an excerpt from the "Getting Unstuck" on-line course. If you would like to enroll in the course, click here. Each of us gets hooked in habitual ways of seeing the world, but how we respond to these situations will in large part determine how much peace and freedom we experience in our lives. Once we learn to recognize when we’re caught, and our own unique styles of getting hooked, we then have the opportunity to do something different, to choose a fresh alternative. Positive Groundlessness and the Three Difficult Practices The first difficult practice is noticing when you get hooked, when you get caught in a habitual pattern which causes you to suffer. Pema explains that, with some practice, you can catch on to this rather quickly and begin to clearly notice when you are hooked. Further, we learn that getting hooked, in and of itself, is not actually a problem; it is quite natural and arises spontaneously in all of us. There is no suffering inherent in the hooking itself, Pema explains, but only in how we respond to it. The second difficult practice is: do something different. This practice is much more difficult to catch on to, Pema teaches, and goes against the grain of our conditioning and habits. This practice is also referred to as “choosing a fresh alternative.” Through this practice, we begin to explore the interruption of the momentum which keeps our suffering alive. In the face of this “being hooked”, we often speak and act in ways which only serve to strengthen our habits of resentment, anger, blaming others, and so forth, which just entrench us in patterns that make us more and more unhappy. The third and final difficult practice is making this exploration a way of life. The notion here is that this is not just a one-time thing where you notice you’re hooked, choose a fresh alternative, and then it’s all over. These patterns are something that will continue to arise in our experience, leaving us with dozens or hundreds of opportunities each week to notice the various ways we get caught in the momentum of our habitual responses to life’s challenges. We also learn about the teaching of “positive groundlessness.” When we notice that we’ve been hooked, we find it very difficult to relax into the experience and to stay open and unbiased, simply experiencing the rawness of what is there. In this space we see that there is truly nothing to hold onto-- no bias, no preference. On the one hand, this experience is quite terrifying, this reality of no ground underneath our feet, no fixed reference point or view in which we can hang out in. But this groundlessness is also filled with “positive” qualities, such as wide open vastness, limitlessness, and extraordinary potential. Published with permission from Daily OM ******************************************* A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day Any number of addicted people are bedeviled by the dire conviction that if they ever go near The Program — whether by attending meetings or talking on-tune with a member — they’ll be pressured to conform to some particular brand of faith or religion. They don’t realize that faith is never an imperative for membership in The Program; that freedom from addiction can be achieved with an easily acceptable minimum of it; and that our concerts of a Higher Power and God — as we understand Him — afford everyone a nearly unlimited choice of spiritual belief and action. Am I receiving strength by sharing with newcomers? Today I Pray May I never frighten newcomers or keep away those who are considering coming to The Program by “laying on them” my particular, personal ideas about a Higher Power. May each discover his or her own spiritual identity. May all find within themselves a link with some great universal. Being or Spirit whose Power is greater than theirs individually. May I grow, both in tolerance and in spirituality, every day. Today I Will Remember I will reach, not preach. ******************************************* One More Day Tears are summer showers to the soul. – Alfred Austin All our lives, we have been told that time would heal all wounds – and that if time couldn’t then the doctor would. There are few things which may feel as final as a diagnosis of chronic illness. Chronic means forever — and we can never hardly conceive of a problem that will never go away. We may find ourselves crying over and over again, and wonder if the tears will ever end. For many of us, our tears were how we began to grieve. Grief was how we started to heal ourselves emotionally from the burden of “forever.” The tears we shed helped cleanse our thoughts and bodies so we could move on to live the rest of our lives. Today, our grief and weeping will help us continue to grow. I can let myself shed the purifying tears that well up in my heart. They will help me move on with my life. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~ BE STILL ~ Be still, and know that I am God. The Bible, Book of Psalms I don't always know what "normal" is. I'm learning that my disease keeps me from having a normal relationship with food, but I also know that there are times when my feelings and thoughts are due to normal circumstances. I might not feel well physically, I could be fatigued from a demanding task, or I might simply be having an off day. There are normal reactions to these situations and I can feel them. Not everything is caused by my disease! However, the way I handle these kinds of experiences can very much be affected by my disease. On those bad days, I don't have to make important decisions and I don't have to filter experiences through these thoughts and feelings. I can postpone things until I'm on a more even keel and, just for today, take care of myself and do the next right thing. One Day at a Time . . . I am grateful for the ways I am "normal" and thank God for the knowledge that I don't have to let my disease make me think everything about me is "sick." Let me simply be still on those uneven days and know that God is God and He is there. ~ Sandee S. ~ ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote When writing or speaking publicly about alcoholism, we urge each of our Fellowship to omit his personal name, designating himself instead as a member of 'Alcoholics Anonymous.' - Pg. xiii - Forward To The First Edition Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Is yesterday something that you worry about? Some yesterday? Whatever its mistakes, faults, blunders, or pains it has passed forever beyond your control. You cannot erase a single word or deed from your 'yesterdays.' On this road of recovery, we find it best to simply worry about right now. Right now I am safe. Right now I am abstinent. Right now I am not harming myself. Right now I am relying on a Power Greater then myself to see me through this. Giving Today I give with both hands. Giving for its own sake is the spiritual way and actually releases the gift. When I give with one hand and take with the other, I give only half of what I have and receive only half of what might be given to me. I limit myself in two ways. Somehow the universe responds to clear intention. When I fully release a gift, it goes to where it is supposed to go and what returns to me comes when and how it is right. I am able to give with both hands - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote 'You can't laugh and think at the same time! So every time you laugh you're getting a break from you.' ~Ken D. (P 153, Alkiespeak) I take my program seriously, not myself. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book I will to will your will. ~CDA Book Page 48 Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I have faith and perseverance to stay on my path and to do what is necessary whether or not it gives me immediate results and gratification. I am letting go of my impatience, procrastination, fear and doubt. I trust that God knows the right time for the right results. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote Twelve Steps in six words: I can't. God can. Let Him. - Unknown origin. |
April 14
Daily Reflections THE "NUMBER ONE OFFENDER" Resentment is the "number one" offender. It destroys more alcoholics than anything else. From it stem all forms of spiritual disease, for we have been not only mentally and physically ill, we have been spiritually sick. ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS, p. 64 As I look at myself practicing the Fourth Step, it is easy to gloss over the wrong that I have done, because I can easily see it as a question of "getting even" for a wrong done to me. If I continue to relive my old hurt, it is a resentment and resentment bars the sunlight from my soul. If I continue to relive hurts and hates, I will hurt and hate myself. After years in the dark of resentments, I have found the sunlight. I must let go of resentments; I cannot afford them. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day A police captain once told about certain cases he had come across in his police work. The cause of the tragedy in each case was drunkenness. He told his audience about a man who got into an argument with his wife while he was drunk and beat her to death. Then he went out and drank some more. The police captain also told about a woman who got too near the edge of an old quarry hole when she was drunk and fell one hundred and fifty feet to her death. When I read or hear these stories, do I think about our motto: "But for the grace of God"? Meditation For The Day I must keep balance by keeping spiritual things at the center of my life. God will give me this poise and balance if I pray for it. This poise will give me power in dealing with the lives of others. This balance will manifest itself more and more in my own life. I should keep material things in their proper place and keep spiritual things at the center of my life. Then I will be at peace amid the distractions of everyday living. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may dwell with God at the center of my life. I pray that I may keep that inner peace at the center of my being. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Our New Employer, p. 104 We had a new Employer. Being all powerful, He provided what we needed, if we kept close to Him and performed His work well. Established on such a footing, we became less and less interested in ourselves, our little plans and designs. More and more we became interested in seeing what we could contribute to life. As we felt new power flow in, as we enjoyed peace of mind, as we discovered we could face life successfully, as we became conscious of His presence, we began to lose our fear of today, tomorrow, or the hereafter. We were reborn. Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 63 ************************************************** ********* Walk in Dry Places What causes a binge? Understanding honesty. In the foggy world of drinking, we were sometimes confused about cause and effect. A person might think of a binge as having been caused by a fight with his or her spouse. The real truth, however, is that he or she provoked the fight in order to get out of the house to launch a drinking spree. It was really the need to drink that caused the fight, and not the reverse, as the alcoholic believes. We must always understand that the compulsion to drink is the root cause of every binge. We may blame certain things that seemed to trigger a drunk, but it is always our own compulsion that gives force to such an action. Nonalcoholics have the same human experiences we do, but such things do not cause them to have binges. Seasoned AA members are trained by their experience to detect and defuse these false causes. "There are excuses but never good reasons for drinking," they say. We always drink because we want to drink, not because another's actions forced us into it. Once we've established real sobriety, we also learn to identify the excuses and devices that helped us blame our binges on other people and conditions. We learn that we are always responsible for maintaining our own sobriety. I intend to get along with everybody today and to meet all conditions and circumstances in a mature manner. Nothing can trigger a binge but my own desire to take a drink. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple It is enough that I am of value to somebody today.---Hugh Prather Even in recovery, we addicts often feel we are not enough. Maybe it's leftover shame from our using days. But we are enough. We are of great value. We all need each other to stay sober. Each of us needs other recovering people to help us remember the hell of addiction. We can forget how bad it was, but telling our stories makes us remember. When you feel you don't want to stay sober for yourself, then stay sober for your brothers and sisters in the program. They need you. You're their recovery, as they're yours. There may be days you don't feel glad to be sober. But your friends in this fellowship are glad you're sober. They thank-you for your sobriety Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, may Your will, not mine, be done. Action For the Day: I'll stop and think of all the people I'm glad for. I'll start telling them today. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning Only those who dare, truly live. --Ruth P. Freedman We receive from life, from every experience, from each interaction according to what we have given. When we commit ourselves fully to an experience, it will bless us. When we give ourselves wholly to any moment, our awareness of reality will be heightened. When we risk knowing someone else, truly knowing them, we will find ourselves. How common, and how unfortunate, that so many of us "escape" life! We escape through hiding, hiding from ourselves and others. We fear self-disclosure, our own and someone else's. Before choosing abstinence, our escape was easier. Now, the Steps make escape hard, fortunately. Having a sponsor--and being one--helps. Taking a Fifth and working the Twelfth helps. Going to meetings and sharing helps. Our experiences today won't come around again---in just the same way. The people in our lives won't say again just what they'll say today. We must not miss out on what life offers. We can risk feeling it all, hearing it all, seeing it all. The riches of a full life are so easily mine, and so deservedly mine. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition WE AGNOSTICS What is this but a miracle of healing? Yet its elements are simple. Circumstances made him willing to believe. He humbly offered himself to his Maker—then he knew. Even so has God restored us all to our right minds. To this man, the revelation was sudden. Some of us grow into it more slowly. But He has come to all who have honestly sought Him. When we drew near to Him He disclosed Himself to us! p. 57 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories The Keys Of The Kingdom This worldly lady helped to develop A.A. in Chicago and thus passed her keys to many. Needless to say, this was not pleasurable drinking. I had long since given up any pretense of the social cocktail hour. This was drinking in sheer desperation, alone and locked behind my own door. Alone in the relative safety of my home because I knew I dare not risk the danger of blacking out in some public place ot at the wheel of a car. I could no longer gauge my capacity, and it might ne the second or the tenth drink that would erase my consciousness. p. 270 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Foreword Many people, nonalcoholics, report that as a result of the practice of A.A.'s Twelve Steps, they have been able to meet other difficulties of life. They think that the Twelve Steps can mean more than sobriety for problem drinkers. They see in them a way to happy and effective living for many, alcoholic or not. pp. 15-16 ************************************************** ********* May I sit comfortably in silence, so that I can hear Gods words. --SweetyZee Be thankful for each and every morning. Enjoy life and don't worry about things that won't matter in 10 years anyway. When the solution is simple, God is answering. --Albert Einstein And in the end it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years. --Abraham Lincoln "One of the greatest gifts you can give to anyone is the gift of attention." --Jim Rohn "Put duties aside at least an hour before bed and perform soothing, quiet activities that will help you relax." --Dianne Hales "If you haven't forgiven yourself something, how can you forgive others?" --Dolores Huerta "Minutes are worth more than money. Spend them wisely." --Thomas P. Murphy "The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and over and over again, but expecting a different result." --Albert Einstein ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation LIFE "May you live all the days of your life." --Jonathan Swift I heard a story that offers a key to the meaning of spirituality: Two little fish were huddled together, afraid to move. A large fish swam by them, confident and strong. The big fish shouted out to the two little fish, "Why don't you swim out and enjoy the beautiful ocean?" The two little fish looked at each other and asked, "Where is the ocean?" They were in it but they didn't know it! As an alcoholic I existed in life but I didn't live: I missed vacations, people, friendships, feelings, nature, sunsets and God. Like so many addicts, I was numbered amongst the "walking dead". Today I continue to make a spiritual choice that avoids alcohol and I am able to feel again. Today I am alive. In You I live to love and love to live. ************************************************** ********* "It is better to trust in the LORD than to put confidence in man." Psalms 118:8 "Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity." I Timothy 4:12 You shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free. John 8:32 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Start the day with prayer and a commitment to conquer any difficulties that happen and a firmer commitment to not let them conquer you. Lord, bless me with all that I need to make the best of every situation. Celebrate your creativity. You are a child of the Great Creator, created in His image. Lord, may I touch others because of the gifts with which you have blessed me. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today A New Vision "Do we really want to be rid of our resentments, our anger, our fear?" Basic Text p. 33 Why do we call them "shortcomings?" Perhaps they should be called "long-goings" because that's often what it takes for them to fade from our lives. Some of us feel that our shortcomings are the very characteristics that saved our lives when we used. If this is true, then it is little wonder that we sometimes cling to them like old, dear friends. If we are having trouble with resentment, anger, or fear, we may want to envision what our lives could be like without these troubling defects. Asking ourselves why we react in a certain manner can sometimes root out the fear at the core of our conduct. "Why am I afraid to step beyond these aspects of my personality?" we ask ourselves. "Am I afraid of who I will be without these attributes?" Once we have uncovered our fear, we are able to move beyond it. We try to imagine what our lives could be like without some of our more glaring shortcomings. This gives us a feeling for what lies past our fear, providing the motivation we need to push through it. Our Higher Power offers us a new vision for our lives, free of our defects. That vision is the essence of our own best, brightest dreams for ourselves. We need not fear that vision. Just for today: I will imagine what my life would be like without my character defects. I will ask for the willingness to have God remove my shortcomings. ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. There the penitents took off their shoes And walked barefoot the remaining mile. --Robert Lowell Some people have to have pain. If dirt doesn't fall on their heads from the sky, they sulk in corners and hope their flesh turns to dust. They do everything the hard way, even when they know better, and often complain and accuse others for their pain. For people like this, even the song of a bird is a bother. It's better to smile when people like that accuse. It's better to wear shoes when walking on stones, better to take the shortest way. There is weeping and wailing enough in the world, dumps full of worn-out guilt and remorse. When the bird sings, it's better to look up and see that it beats its wings not to punish itself, but to fly. Do I pity myself when I could be flying? You are reading from the book Touchstones. A person who is looking for something doesn't travel very fast. --E. B. White What do men really want? What are we seeking? Many of us have felt driven and still feel restless or compulsive at times. We frantically followed our impulses to self-destructive extremes. Even those painful actions of our past were motivated, at the bottom line, by a spiritual search. What did we really seek in the bottle, or in the passionate bed, or in our work? Slowing down enough every day to let ourselves know what we are looking for gives us a much better chance of finding it. Today we can slow down by taking twenty minutes for solitude and quiet, for meditation or prayer. We can call a friend simply for a moment of contact. We might read something to give ourselves some ideas to ponder, or we can listen to music which will transport us to another world. Perhaps we can simply walk more slowly from our cars or the bus stop to our homes. Often it is not the events in our lives that bring change but the space between events. Today, I will try to remember that slowing down may help me find what I am seeking. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. Only those who dare, truly live. --Ruth P. Freedman We receive from life, from every experience, from each interaction according to what we have given. When we commit ourselves fully to an experience, it will bless us. When we give ourselves wholly to any moment, our awareness of reality will be heightened. When we risk knowing someone else, truly knowing them, we will find ourselves. How common, and how unfortunate, that so many of us "escape" life! We escape through hiding, hiding from ourselves and others. We fear self-disclosure, our own and someone else's. Before choosing abstinence, our escape was easier. Now, the Steps make escape hard, fortunately. Having a sponsor--and being one--helps. Taking a Fifth and working the Twelfth helps. Going to meetings and sharing helps. Our experiences today won't come around again---in just the same way. The people in our lives won't say again just what they'll say today. We must not miss out on what life offers. We can risk feeling it all, hearing it all, seeing it all. The riches of a full life are so easily mine, and so deservedly mine. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Perfectionism Recovery from codependency is an individual process that necessitates making mistakes, struggling through problems, and facing tough issues. Expecting ourselves to be perfect slows this process; it puts us in a guilty and anxious state. Expecting others to be perfect is equally destructive; it makes others feel ashamed and may interfere with their growth. People are human and vulnerable, and that is wonderful. We can accept and cherish that idea. Expecting others to be perfect puts us in that codependent state of moral superiority. Expecting ourselves to be perfect makes us feel rigid and inferior. We can let go of both ideas. We do not need to go to the other extreme; tolerating anything people throw our way. We can still expect appropriate, responsible behavior from ourselves. But most of us can afford to loosen up a bit. And when we stop expecting others to be perfect, we may discover that they're doing much better than we thought. When we stop expecting ourselves to be perfect, well discover the beauty in ourselves. Today, I will practice tolerance, acceptance, and love of others as they are, and myself as I am. I will strive for that balance between expecting too much and expecting too little from others and myself. Today I am growing in my awareness that my mind, body and spirit need exercise and nourishment. Through prayer and meditation, exercise and reading, I am developing a personal program for physical, mental and spiritual growth. --Ruth Fishel ******************************************* Journey To The Heart Relax Too often out of sheer habit we tighten up, tense up, and then approach life from that stance. When we have something to do, our automatic response may be to tense up– shoulders and neck strained, back bent and cramped, breathing shallow. But anything that needs to be done can be done better if we’re relaxed. Learn to relax. Program your body, each part of it, to let go and be at ease. Allow yourself to come into your natural posture and alignment. Learn to relax until moving, acting, speaking, being all come naturally from this relaxed place. Find activities that help you do this. A hot bath. A massage. Sunning. Walking. Meditating. Teach yourself to become aware of how your body feels during these activities. Memorize that feeling. Practice relaxing until you can recall that memory and carry it throughout your day. Periodically thoughout the day, take a few moments to check your tension level. If you find any part of your body tense, take a few more moments to consciously relax that part. Visualize warmth and ease flooding any part of your body that has become tight or is in pain. Let the tension, the stress, the blocks drain out from top to bottom. Your body wants to relax. It wants to become comfortable. It wants to heal itself. Empty your mind of tense thoughts, and let it follow your body into relaxation and calm. Allow your mind to become still. Quietly accept each thought, then release it. Breathe in comforting, healing energy. Breathe it into your mind, into each cell of your body. Breathe out stress, strain, discomfort, and fear. Don’t resist what you are feeling or thinking. Accept it, then release it. Just as water cannot pass naturally through a pinched hose, your vital life force cannot flow freely through you if you are cramped and tense. Honor the life force that is in you, that flows through you. Honor it by relaxing, opening to it, and inviting it to surge through your body. The techniques of relaxation will refresh, restore, and recharge you, so that you can do all you need to do with more power and vigor than before. Anything that needs to be done can be done better if you’re relaxed. ******************************************* More Language Of Letting Go What do you want? “I went to the grocery store to pick up a few things,” a friend said. “I stood in front of the condiments section, staring at the pickles and olives. What I really wanted was the olives. What I bought was the pickles. It wasn’t about the cost,” he said. “It was about deliberately depriving myself of what I want.” Sometimes things happen in life. We’ve talked about that before. We start out with good intentions about what we want: a family, health, a modicum of success in our career. Then something unforeseen rips it away. Maybe our family life as a child was destroyed when someone in the family got sick or died. Maybe this happened later in life– when we were betrayed by a spouse. We may not be able to have everything we want in life. And we may sometimes get things we thought we wanted, then change our mind. But we still don’t have to torture ourselves by telling ourselves that we can’t have what we want. What do you want? Do you know? Or have you shut that part of yourself down? Yes, we all have times of discipline. And there’s much to be learned by denying ourselves, at certain times, of certain pleasures. It’s not good to want something or someone so much that desire runs and rules our lives. And sometimes wanting what we can’t have can make life more interesting. But it’s okay to open our hearts to ourselves and be clear about what we want in our small and larger choices. Learn to master desire. Open your heart to what you want. Then say it. Pickles or olives, which will it be? God, teach me to master my desires. Grant me the wisdom to know when something needs to be off-limits for me, and when I am unnecessarily depriving myself of the pleasures and joys here on earth. ******************************************* The Mirroring World We Are Like Nature Nature is a mirror, inspiring and teaching us, deepening our sense of belonging in the world. Wherever you look, you can see that our patterns and the patterns of the natural world are the same. You can find this resonance in every form, from molecules to plants and animals and to planets. We live our lives according to the same principles as the trees, the mountains, the clouds, and the birds. We begin our lives in the womb, folded in on ourselves like the bud of a flower. We can see our whole lives in the mirror of this natural form. When we emerge from the womb, we slowly begin our unfolding, just as the flower begins to open its petals. At its prime, the flower draws many insects to it and also the eyes of appreciative humans. When the flower’s petals begin to fade and its life cycle comes to an end, it ceases to hold itself upright and returns to the earth. Traditionally, we return to the earth, just as all plants and animals do. Like flowers, we leave behind seeds in the forms of children and other gifts only we could have given. They continue to unfold even after we are gone. Rebirth is encoded into our lives, and death is just one part of the cycle. Look around you, and you will find connection and insight. Notice how your moods shift from one to another like the sky shifts from bright blue to turbulent grays. Your thoughts are like clouds, appearing, changing shape, passing through, and then disappearing without a trace. The rain cleanses the sky, just as an emotional release cleanses your mind. The sky itself is your eternal awareness, unchanging underneath all these permutations. Let it reflect back to you your own abiding perfection. As you walk through the world, find your own metaphors for connectedness in nature. Flesh them out fully and follow them as they lead you through the mystery and intelligence of life. Published with permission from Daily OM ******************************************* A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day Every man and woman who has joined The Program and intends to stick around has, without realizing it, made a beginning on Step Three. Isn’t it true that, in all matters related to their addictions, each of them has decided to turn his or her life over to the care, protection, and guidance of The Program? So already a willingness has been achieved to cast out one’s own will and one’s own ideas about the addiction in favor of those suggested by The Program. If this isn’t turning one’s will and life over to a new-found “Providence,” then what is it? Have I had a spiritual awakening as the results of The Steps? Today I Pray For myself, I pray for a God-centered life. I think Him often for the spiritual awakening. I have felt since I turned my awakening I have felt since I turned my life over to Him. May the words “spiritual awakening” be a clue to others that there is a free fund of spiritual power within each person. It must only be discovered. Today I Will Remember I will try to be God-centered. ******************************************* One More Day You are the handicap you must face. You are the one who must choose your place. – James Allen Each of us carries a handicap, although some handicaps are more obvious than others. They can be physical limitations, but they can also be emotions, feelings, or attitudes that impede the full enjoyment and promise of living. A handicap may be an image problem or dismay at how we walk or talk, or it could be chronic illness. And we certainly can have more than one handicap. A full life depends on our ability to cope with our difficulties and to decide whether any of them are self-imposed. We haven’t chosen all our limitations — physical or emotional — but we can choose to strip our lives of the ones we’ve created. And we can choose how we will respond to the others. I will define my special place in the world, and I will try to meet my own best expectations. ***************************************** One Day At A Time FEARLESS “As we felt new power flow in, as we enjoyed peace of mind, as we discovered we could face life successfully, as we became conscious of His presence, we began to lose our fear of today, tomorrow or the hereafter.” The Big Book I refuse to be frightened to the point of missing the opportunities my Higher Power has provided for me. I will no longer hurt myself by avoiding being hurt. When I avoid risks because I'm afraid the outcome will be painful, I am stuck – not safe. By working my program I have discovered that many times when I'm engulfed in fear, I am not trusting my Higher Power. The more I practice the Serenity Prayer, the more serene I become. From my new perspective I can see numerous occasions in which my Higher Power did things for me which I could not do by myself. Possibly a doomed relationship I couldn't end, and my Higher Power ended for me by having the other person walk away. Maybe a financial crisis that was suddenly alleviated from an unexpected source. How about the ability to detach from a loved one's issues without feeling responsible for "fixing" everything or taking their struggles personally. In order to surrender my control over these things, I choose to be fearless in trusting my Higher Power. Today I will be grateful even for the painful times because sometimes they are the lesser of two hurts: the easiest being when God steps in to protect me, and the hardest being when my will prevents me from letting go of something that isn't good for me. One day at a time... I will trust my Higher Power and know that where I am today is right where I need to be. I don't have to have all the answers. ~ Sandee S. ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote Argument and fault-finding are to be avoided like the plague. - Pg. 98 - Working With Others Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Just for today, live in the now. It's a 24 hour program and you only have to worry about this hour. This hour you are clean and in the right place looking for and accepting help. Grant me the patience to accept this hour of abstinence without reservation. It's the Little Things It's the little things that count, that add up to make a life, that weave themselves into the fabric of my day and make it feel whole. My morning routines, the activities of my day the people I encounter and share my time with. Little things like a pleasant walk, exercise, my daily errands and even eating my favorite foods all come together to make my day. As I move through my day today, I will take time to notice and be grateful for whatever gives me pleasure. I will say a quiet thank you for all that life is handing me. I have an Attitude of Gratitude - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote Everyday in our lives is not going to be perfect just because we are not drinking or drugging. The best way we know of to treat PMS (Poor Me Syndrome) is get rid of the words 'It ain't fair' and 'Why me?' God does not owe me happiness because I no longer am an intolerant, abusive, self-centered, practicing addict. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book You may not always know what is right but you sure know what is wrong. Time for Joy - Book - Quote Today I am growing in my awareness that my mind, body and spirit need exercise and nourishment. Through prayer and meditation, exercise and reading, I am developing a personal program for physical, mental and spiritual growth. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote There are thousands who have come to AA and tried to change that Big Book. The key is David; Let that book change you.' - David O's sponsor. |
April 15
Daily Reflections THE BONDAGE OF RESENTMENTS . . . harboring resentment is infinitely grave. For then we shut ourselves off from the sunlight of the spirit. AS BILL SEES IT, p. 5 It has been said, "Anger is a luxury I cannot afford." Does this suggest I ignore this human emotion? I believe not. Before I learned of the A.A. program, I was a slave to the behavior patterns of alcoholism. I was chained to negativity, with no hope of cutting loose. The Steps offered me an alternative. Step Four was the beginning of the end of my bondage. The process of "letting go" started with an inventory. I needed not be frightened, for the previous Steps assured me I was not alone. My Higher Power led me to this door and gave me the gift of choice. Today I can choose to open the door to freedom and rejoice in the sunlight of the Steps, as they cleanse the spirit within me. ************************************************** ********* Twenty-Four Hours A Day A.A. Thought For The Day Terrible things could have happened to any one of us. We never will know what might have happened to us when we were drunk. We usually thought: "That couldn't happen to me." But any one of us could have killed somebody or have been killed ourselves, if we were drunk enough. But fear of these things never kept us from drinking. Do I believe that in A.A. we have something more effective than fear? Meditation For The Day I must keep calm and unmoved in the vicissitudes of life. I must go back into the silence of communion with God to recover this calm when it is lost even for one moment. I will accomplish more by this calmness than by all the activities of a long day. At all cost I will keep calm. I can solve nothing when I am agitated. I should keep away from things that are upsetting emotionally. I should run on an even keel and not get tipped over by emotional upsets. I should seek for things that are calm and good and true and stick to those things. Prayer For The Day I pray that I may not argue nor contend, but merely state calmly what I believe to be true. I pray that I may keep myself in that state of calmness that comes from faith in God's purpose for the world. ************************************************** ********* As Bill Sees It Move Ahead, p. 105 To spend too much time on any one alcoholic is to deny some other an opportunity to live and be happy. One of our Fellowship failed entirely with his first half-dozen prospects. He often says that if he had continued to work on them, he might have deprived many others, who have since recovered, of their chance. << << << >> >> >> "Our chief responsibility to the newcomer is an adequate presentation of the program. If he does nothing or argues, we do nothing but maintain our own sobriety. If he starts to move ahead, even a little, with an open mind, we then break our necks to help in every way we can." 1. Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 96 2. Letter, 1942 ************************************************** ********* Walk in Dry Places When Things are Not humanly possible._____ Facing Difficulties We're reminded again and again that "No human power could have relieved our alcoholism." Whatever it is that keeps us sober must come from a Higher Power … God as we understand Him. This fact about our alcoholism also has broader application to the general conditions of life. There's an almost endless list of conditions that are not humanly possible to change. Some of these conditions apply only to us; others, such as war and disease, cruelly afflict all of humankind. Looking at this sorry picture, many of us wish we had the power to apply Twelve Step principles to all human problems. While we don't have such power at the moment, we do have the power to take a spiritual view of all seemingly hopeless conditions. This includes trying to do whatever we can about any problem, while recognizing that the real solution must eventually come from a Higher Power. We must never lose hope that God will cork with us and through us to create a better world. In a small way, we can help by sharing what happened to us in our recovery from alcoholism. No human power could have relieved our alcoholism, but God could and did. Though I live and work with people who may be frightened and cynical, I'll hold to the idea that a Higher Power is working ceaselessly to improve the human condition in general. There is no reason why the miraculous healing power that relieved my alcoholism should not apply to other problems in my life. ************************************************** ********* Keep It Simple That day is lost on which one has not laughed. ---French proverb For a long time, we didn't really laugh. It's surprising when we think about it: We hadn't really laughed for so long . . . we almost forgot how good we could feel. It feels so good to laugh again! Now our spirits come more alive each day. Now we feel what alcohol and other drugs stuffed deep inside us. Pain, fear and anger come up. But so do happiness and joy, thankfulness and a sense of humor. In early recovery, we work through the hard feelings. As we grow in the program, we have more and more room for happiness. Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, wake me up to the joy and laughter that today holds for me. Don't let me miss it! Action for the Day: Today, I'll spread some laughter. I will learn a joke and tell it to three people. ************************************************** ********* Each Day a New Beginning It seems to me that I have always been waiting for something better - sometimes to see the best I had snatched from me. --Dorothy Reed Mendenhall Gratitude for what is prepares us for the blessings just around the corner. What is so necessary to understand is that our wait for what's around the corner closes our eyes to the joys of the present moment. We have only the 24 hours ahead of us. In fact, all we can be certain of having is the moment we are presently experiencing. And it is a gift to be enjoyed. There is no better gift just right for us than this moment, at this time. We can, each of us, look back on former days, realizing that we learned too late the value of a friend or an experience. Both are now gone. With practice and a commitment to ourselves, we can learn to reap the benefits of today, hour by hour. When we detach from the present and wait for tomorrow, or next week, or look to next year, we are stunting our spiritual growth. Life can only bless us now, one breath at a time. I can live in the present if I choose to. Gentle reminders are often necessary, however. I will step into my life, today. It can become a habit, one I will never want to break. ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Chapter 5 - HOW IT WORKS RARELY HAVE we seen a person fail who has thoroughly followed our path. Those who do not recover are people who cannot or will not completely give themselves to this simple program, usually men and women who are constitutionally incapable of being honest with themselves. There are such unfortunates. They are not at fault; they seem to have been born that way. They are naturally incapable of grasping and developing a manner of living which demands rigorous honesty. Their chances are less than average. There are those, too, who suffer from grave emotional and mental disorders, but many of them do recover if they have the capacity to be honest. p. 58 ************************************************** ********* Alcoholics Anonymous - Fourth Edition Stories The Keys Of The Kingdom This worldly lady helped to develop A.A. in Chicago and thus passed her keys to many. The next three years saw me in sanitariums, once in a ten-day coma, from which I very nearly did not recover, in and out of hospitals or confined at home with day and night nurses. By now I wanted to die but had lost the courage even to take my life. I was trapped, and for the life of me I did not know how or why this had happened to me. And all the while my fear fed a growing conviction that before long it would be necessary for me to be put away in some institution. People didn't behave this way outside of an asylum. I had heartsickness, shame, and fear bordering on panic, and no complete escape any longer except in oblivion. Certainly, now, anyone would have agreed that only a miracle could prevent my final breakdown. But how does one get a prescription for miracle? p. 270 ************************************************** ********* Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions Foreword There is, too, a rising interest in the Twelve Traditions of Alcoholics Anonymous. Students of human relations are beginning to wonder how and why A.A. functions as a society. Why is it, they ask, that in A.A. no member can be set in personal authority over another, that nothing like a central government can anywhere be seen? How can a set of traditional principles, having no legal force at all, hold the Fellowship of Alcoholics Anonymous in unity and effectiveness? The second section of this volume, though designed for A.A.'s membership, will give such inquirers an inside view of A.A. never before possible. p. 16 ************************************************** ********* To give without any reward, or any notice, has a special quality of its own. --Anne Morrow Lindbergh Listen to your feelings. They tell you when you need to take care of yourself, like finding a friend if you feel lonely, crying if you feel sad, singing and smiling if you feel happy, and acting frisky if you feel good. --Pat Palmer Being happy doesn't mean everything's perfect, it just means you've decided to see beyond the imperfections. "The spiritual journey, the path of recovery and personal growth, is a detoxification process in which we bring up and out the negative beliefs we have carried with us from the past and that now poison the present." --Marianne Williamson "Things turn out best for the people who make the best out of the way things turn out." --Art Linkletter As long as you're recreating yourself, why not start by simply being GLAD! to be alive? --LUMPYSEZ "He who trims himself to suit everyone will soon whittle himself away." --Raymond Hull "God doesn't play dice." --Albert Einstein God always leads us toward life. --Gracie M. Willingham ************************************************** ********* Father Leo's Daily Meditation SOLITUDE "People who take time to be alone usually have depth, originality and quiet reserve." --John Miller I need to be alone. I need time to listen to my thoughts, consider my opinions and strengthen my body. I need to pull away from my hectic life to be alone with me. As a drinking alcoholic I hated to be alone. I became paranoiac about "leaving the fort" - today I accept that nobody is indispensable and that the world will still be there when I return from the desert! Today I grow in the stillness of solitude. I can rest in that "still" part of me that is the essential me. God is very close to me in the silence of self. Lord, in the stillness of Your life, I am healed and rejuvenated. ************************************************** ********* "He who says he is in the light, and hates his brother, is in darkness until now." 1 John 2:9 "Whoever trusts in the Lord will be enriched." Proverbs 28:25 ************************************************** ********* Daily Inspiration Never give up on yourself because God never gives up on you. Lord, You forgive me. Who am I not to forgive myself too? God is always doing new things in our lives. Lord, help me to close the door to my past and take the time to notice and enjoy the newness I am experiencing right now. ************************************************** ********* NA Just For Today Keep Coming Back "We have come to enjoy living clean and want more of the good things that the NA fellowship holds for us" Basic Text p. 26 Can you remember a time when you looked at the addicts recovering in NA and wondered, "If they aren't using drugs what on earth do they have to laugh about?" Did you believe that the fun stoped when the using stopped? So many of us did. We were certain that we were leaving the good life behind. Today many of us can laugh at that misconception because we know how full our life in recovery can be. Many of the things we enjoy so much in recovery are gained by actively participating in the fellowship of NA. We begin to find true companionship, friends who understand and care about us just for ouselves. We find a place where we can be useful to others. There are recovery meetings, service activities, and fellowship gatherings to fill out time and accupy our interests. The fellowship can be a mirror to reflect back to us a more acurate imagine of who we are. We find teachers, helpers, friends, love, care,and support. The fellowship always has more to offer us, as long as we keep coming back. Just for today: I know where the good life is. I'll keep coming back. pg. 109 ************************************************** ********* You are reading from the book Today's Gift. If I have freedom in my life, And in my soul am free, Angels alone that soar above Enjoy such liberty. --Richard Lovelace When a cow decides to stop nursing her calf, she isn't rejecting it. She knows it's time for the calf to be on its own. Although the calf might feel rejected and puzzled at first, it soon adapts to its new independence and freedom. When we feel rejected, it's useful to remember that whatever has caused us to feel this way might have nothing to do with us. It might be a reflection of what's happening with someone else, or just the end of a natural stage in life, as with the calf. When we understand that others' actions toward us come from their own feelings, and that we don't cause their feelings any more than they control ours, we can free ourselves from a little bit of fear and self-hate. We can see what seems to be rejection as an open door, with our freedom on the other side. What rejections have set me free? You are reading from the book Touchstones. Just be what you are and speak from your guts and heart - it's all a man has. --Hubert Humphrey Some of us have doubted our inner voice so completely that we abandoned it totally. Many of us have discovered in recovery that by our denial we had violated our inner voice with lies, even to ourselves. Now we question whether we can trust our instincts, and we may not know what we feel. Masculine spiritual recovery is a return to our guts and our heart. Standing up and speaking from our hearts may be difficult at times, but our self-respect rises as we do. That is where we go for our final decision-making. We develop better reception for the inner voice as we live this program. We accept that we are never absolutely right. We continue with humility, knowing we may be wrong and listening to others and our Higher Power. Yet we must live with our choices. I will seek the courage to be faithful to my own instincts. You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning. It seems to me that I have always been waiting for something better - sometimes to see the best I had snatched from me. --Dorothy Reed Mendenhall Gratitude for what is prepares us for the blessings just around the corner. What is so necessary to understand is that our wait for what's around the corner closes our eyes to the joys of the present moment. We have only the 24 hours ahead of us. In fact, all we can be certain of having is the moment we are presently experiencing. And it is a gift to be enjoyed. There is no better gift just right for us than this moment, at this time. We can, each of us, look back on former days, realizing that we learned too late the value of a friend or an experience. Both are now gone. With practice and a commitment to ourselves, we can learn to reap the benefits of today, hour by hour. When we detach from the present and wait for tomorrow, or next week, or look to next year, we are stunting our spiritual growth. Life can only bless us now, one breath at a time. I can live in the present if I choose to. Gentle reminders are often necessary, however. I will step into my life, today. It can become a habit, one I will never want to break. You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go. Communication Part of owning our power is learning to communicate clearly, directly, and assertively. We don't have to beat around the bush in our conversations to control the reactions of others. Guilt producing comments only produce guilt. We don't have to fix or take care of people with our words; we cant expect others to take care of us with words either. We can settle for being heard and accepted. And we can respectfully listen to what others have to say. Hinting at what we need doesn't work. Others cant read our mind, and they're likely to resent our indirectness. The best way to take responsibility for what we want is to ask for it directly. And, we can insist on directness from others. If we need to say no to a particular request, we can. If someone is trying to control us through a conversation, we can refuse to participate. Acknowledging feelings such as disappointment or anger directly, instead of making others guess at our feelings or having our feelings come out in other ways, is part of responsible communication. If we don't know what we want to say, we can say that too. We can ask for information and use words to forge a closer connection, but we don't have to take people around the block with our conversations. We don't have to listen to, or participate in, nonsense. We can say what we want and stop when were done. Today, I will communicate clearly and directly in my conversations with others. I will strive to avoid manipulative, indirect, or guilt producing statements. I can be tactful and gentle whenever possible. And I can be assertive if necessary. It is beautiful to know that I am the creator of how I think and feel today, that I can choose my now. Today I choose to feel joy and I will do all that I have to do to make that possible. --Ruth Fishel ******************************************* Journey To The Heart Imagine What You Want What do you want? What do you want to create in your life? What situation do you want to live in? Describe the scenario. Imagine it. We can often have what we want, but we rarely take the time to imagine it. And imagination is the first step toward creativity. What do you want? What would it look like, feel like? Is what you’re working so hard on what you really want? That relationship? That job? That home? If it is, go for it. If it’s not, imagine and create something different. Begin with imagination. Imagine what you really want in your mind, and you’ve taken the first step toward creating it. If you don’t know what you want, that’s okay too. Ask the universe for help. Ask God and the universe to bring you your highest good. Ask the universe to help you create exactly what you want and need. Trust the universe, and you will be trusting an honorable and benevolent friend. ******************************************* More Language Of Letting Go Say what you can’t have “Why is it,” one man asked, “that if I walk into a room with one hundred women, the one I’m attracted to will either be engaged to someone else or live across the country? Will someone please explain that to me?” I laughed when he asked the question, although he wasn’t trying to be funny. Many people find themselves enamored with what they can’t have. His question struck a cord because I’m one of them. Unavailability– and not being able to have what you want– although painful, can be deliciously enticing in many ways. That miserable, deprived place feels so comfy and familiar to us. Even though we know where it leads– to letdown, loneliness, sitting by the phone– we’ll let that feeling lead us around by the nose. Wanting what we can’t have is a universal dilemma. It’s so easy to conjure up fantasies about how delicious it would be if we could only have that, even though we know we never could. Then we don’t have to deal with what we have. And we don’t have to face issues like intimacy, commitment, and love. Learn to recognize longing and yearning for what we can’t have. And ask for the courage and wisdom to learn about the true delights of available, requited love. If we begin yearning for something we can’t have, we don’t have to take ourselves so seriously. We can see it for what it is and just enjoy a good laugh at ourselves. God, help me stop sabotaging myself. ******************************************* Creating What We Don’t Want When Worry becomes A Prayer If prayer is an intention that we announce to the universe in order to create a desired outcome, then our every thought is a prayer. This includes thoughts of worry as well as of hope. All thoughts are subtle creative energy. Some thoughts are more focused or repeated more often, gathering strength. Some are written down or spoken, giving them even greater power. Every thought we have is part of a process whereby we cocreate our experience and our reality with the universe. When we use our creative energy unconsciously, we create what is commonly known as self-fulfilling prophecy. In essence, when we worry, we are repeatedly praying and lending our energy to the creation of something we don’t want. The good news is that we can retrain our minds and thoughts to focus our energy on what we do desire to bring into our lives. Since most worry is repetitive, it will take more than one positive thought to counteract the energy we’ve created. The simplest antidote to worry is affirmations. When we hold these positive thoughts, repeat them often, speak them and write them and refer to them throughout our day, we are using focused energy to create positive results. We can start right away, together: I am a creative being, using my energy to cocreate a wonderful world. I know that I create my experience of life from within, and as I do so, I also create ripples of energy around me that echo into the world. My positive thoughts gather together with the thoughts and prayers of others, and together we create enough positive energy to heal not only our own lives but the world we share. I am grateful for the ability to cocreate good in my life and in the world. A lot of times we have concerned loved ones that worry about us. When this happens they are also sending out a worry prayer to the world. A loving conversation letting them know what is happening is the easiest solution. Also, ask them to send you positive affirmations rather than worry about you. After all, worry doesn’t do them any good either. Explain to them that worry can actually be energetically harmful to you and that wishing good things for you is much more beneficial and much more fun too. Published with permission from Daily OM ******************************************* A Day At A Time Reflection For The Day Rare are the practicing alcoholics who have any idea how irrational they are, or, seeing their irrationality, can bear to face it. One reason is that they are abetted in their blindness by a world which doesn’t yet understand the difference between sane drinking and alcoholism. The dictionary defines sanity as “soundness of mind.” Yet no alcoholics, soberly analyzing his or her destructive behavior, can truly claim soundness of mind. Have I come to believe, as the Second Step suggests, that a Power greater than myself can restore me to sanity? Today I Pray May I see that my own behavior as a practicing alcoholic, a drug-user or a compulsive over-eater, could be described as “insane.” For those still actively addicted, admitting to “”insane” behavior is well-nigh impossible. I pray that I may continue to abhor the insanities and inanities of my addictive days. May others like me recognize their problems of addiction, find help in treatment and in The Program, and come to believe that a Higher Power can restore them to sanity. Today I Will Remember He restoreth my soul. ******************************************* One More Day Just because everything is different doesn’t mean anything has changed. – Irene Peter Chance may happen gradually without our being aware of it. A sudden event may force us to recognize how different our lives have become. Yet even when the details or circumstances have changed, we may discover that the real meaning of our lives has remained the same. We still carry many of the same values as before. We are thankful for the stable relationships that have grown as we have become stronger. We still strive to succeed in the goals we’ve set. We continue to look for — and to find — meaning in our life experiences. Certainly, we’ve changed and many things are different, but we continue to carry within ourselves the unique person we each are, the person we’ve always been. I have always been a person capable of tremendous growth. I’m thankful that I can make changes that will help me grow. ***************************************** One Day At A Time ~ Success ~ I have begun everything with the idea that I could succeed, and I never had much patience with the multitudes of people who are always ready to explain why one cannot succeed. I have always had a high regard for the man who could tell me how to succeed. Booker T. Washington The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous is my main source of inspiration when it comes to recovery issues. It's proven to be a valuable asset to my program. I've learned from the Big Book that recovery from any compulsive disease is possible. We are given Twelve Steps to follow, and told that if we do what our predecessors did, then we WILL recover. We have to be willing to go to any length to succeed. We have to do the footwork. The people who don't succeed in this program are the ones who don't avail themselves of all the help that's available to them. They don't read the literature, they don't go to meetings, they don't do service ... they don't do what those who have gone before have done. So they wallow in their disease instead of recovering. There's a reason why we're told, "Rarely have we seen a person fail who has thoroughly followed our path." That means the program works IF you work it. Those who don't work the program don't recover. That's a pretty powerful statement, but it's true, and for some reason, a lot of compulsive people just don't get it. They keep doing the same old things and getting the same old results. In the process, they remain fully in the grip of their disease. Sure, recovery is a miracle, but it won't fall into your lap. You need to work for it, and by the grace of the God of your understanding, you'll receive the miracle. One Day at a Time . . . I remember that it's not enough to talk the talk; I need to walk the walk if I want to recover. ~ Jeff ~ ***************************************** AA 'Big Book' - Quote Another principle we observe carefully is that we do not relate intimate experiences of another person unless we are sure he would approve. We find it better, when possible, to stick to our own stories. - Pg. 125 - The Family Afterward Hour To Hour - Book - Quote Frequently, in our first hours and days of giving up using mind-affecting chemicals, our tricky thoughts begin to question, 'Are we really so bad off that we have to stop using right now?' We will want to say, 'Well, no. We're not that bad off.' But how bad do we have to get? Dead? May I not play any head games with myself for this one hour. This hour I am not going to use. The Creative Power of My Thoughts Today, I recognize that I tend to produce in my life what I feel is true for myself. Thoughts have a creative power of their own. If I look closely, I can see my thoughts come to life. I create the possibility of what I would like by first experiencing it in my mind. I will visualize what I would like to have in my life in my mind's eye. I will accept what I see in my inner eye as being available for me, and I will fully participate in my vision as if it were already mine. I will be specific about what I see in my mind's creative eye and I will accept my inner vision as fully possible. I will see it, sense, taste it and see it as already happening. What I believe can be true for me, can be true for me. I block things form happening with my own doubt and disbelief. Today, I will imagine that I can live the life I am able to hold as a steady vision. If I can see it, I can move toward it, I can accept it, I can crate it. All good things are possible for me - Tian Dayton PhD Pocket Sponsor - Book - Quote You must learn to pick up a program, not just set down a drink! They call this foot work. Your Higher Power wants to make a deal with you. You do the foot work and He'll take care of the results. If I have one hand in the fellowship and one hand in God's, I can't pick up today. "Walk Softly and Carry a Big Book" - Book Responsibility: Your response to God's ability. Time for Joy - Book - Quote I will put aside all judgments and accept each and every situation with openness and trust today. Only then will I discover the joy that lies beyond my fear. Alkiespeak - Book - Quote I sat on the steps of that liquor store, with my broken jaw, raccoon eyes, unwashed, uncombed hair. And I sat there waiting for.. I don't know what. And this VW pulls up, and these beautiful Californian AA's; bright smiles, bright eyes - I immediately hated them - got out and walked toward me, like I was a piece of gold, like I was an emerald sitting there on that sidewalk. - Sharon B. |
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