Everything Has To Change
 

Two of the biggest fears about beginning a life of sobriety are knowing everything is about to change, and not knowing what that's going to look like after that has happened. Those fears kept working on me, keeping me locked into a life I desperately wanted to change, but somehow wanted everything to stay the same. At one of the first meetings I went to I heard nothing changes if nothing changes also, that I need to change people, places, and things to get sober. All this did was intensify those fears. I did know what to do. I felt like I was going to be stuck with this way of life that wasn't working and that there wasn't going to be anything I could do about that. How I was able to get through all of this was, first because I knew everything was already messed up in my life, but I didn't really know if things would really be any better or not by trying to change everything that there was the chance things might be better. And even more reassuring to me was the idea if by changing everything didn't work I could always go back to what I knew wasn't working. As crazy as this sounds this is how I was able to get past those fears and I've never looked back