[bluidkiti]

February 23

Step by Step

Today, if life sneaks in unexpected tasks or frustration that delay my plans, I will not cave to anger or a sense of failure at not carrying out my plans to completion. Even if my patience or expectations of myself or others are stretched to the max, I will not whine with self-pity or anything else negative because, if I have gotten through the last 24 Hours sober, I have literally nothing to complain about and absolutely everything for which to be grateful and humble. I have no excuse to morph frustration or anger into self-imposed isolation because isolation is the breeding ground for loneliness – and loneliness can be lethal in recovery. But should I feel lonely, I will reach out to someone who can lend an empathetic – not sympathetic – ear or, in the spirit the 12th step, jump into some form of service to someone or something in need and want. An old saying is that the non-addict who has a flat tire calls Triple A, but the recovering alcoholic with a flat calls Suicide Prevention. Today, I will use the steps to keep events and things in their proper perspective and, if I find I have a flat tire today, I’ll call roadside assistance. Suicide Prevention has other people in greater need. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

THE EIGHTH PROMISE

Our whole attitude and outlook on life will change.

~Big Book ~

Before the Program, the only changes in our lives were in the substances we were using, our companions, or the place we went to use. We only changed the way we obeyed the commands of our compulsion. What didn’t change was the fact that our lives always became worse.

We never admitted that our addiction was our enemy. We always considered it to be a friend in times of need. We believed it was the only way to enjoy life—unti it began to destroy that life. Then we realized it must be put entirely out of our lives if we were to survive.

Our attitudes and outlook on life changed for the better in every way when we began to practice abstinence and work the Steps.

Today I see exciting changes occurring physically, emotionally, and spiritually. I am no longer a slave to the limited changes dictated by my addiction.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Conscience is God’s presence in man.

~ Emanuel Swedenborg ~

As we mature, our conscience grows, and vice versa. We follow a principle that directs us to promptly admit when we are wrong. That practical piece of guidance is the most effective way to become bigger, stronger men. To follow it, we must abandon our ego’s desire to always be right. We must abandon the thought that we are belittled by such an admission.

In this process of becoming better men, we open ourselves and allow God to enter. We let God speak to us and through us by humbly accepting that we don’t always have to be right. The higher principles of honesty and responsibility are our guides, and we don’t expect perfection from ourselves. In that way, we become more honest with ourselves and with our friends.

Today I will be open to the truth that my Higher Power speaks within me.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

Healing can occur when I see my family of origin as just a vessel to bring me into new spiritual growth, rather than as the predictor of all my life’s work.

~ Judi Hollis ~

Traumatic experiences often teach us the most. This surprises us at first: How could the pain have had value? How could God have allowed it? It’s futile to ponder these questions. We experienced what was necessary to fulfill our life’s purpose. We are doing so now.

Many of us came from punishing families. Our successes were ignored, our failures held up for ridicule. How we functioned in our families gave us opportunities to fail so we could then appreciate success, to experience pain so we could understand compassion, to know regret so we could nurture forgiveness. Our families educated us. What we do with what we learned determines where we go now.

Every day I am embarking on an adventure. What I do with my experiences today can be a positive reaction to what I learned from the past.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I don’t have to believe in God to have a higher power

When I first tried the Twelve Step program, I thought I had to believe in God to recover from my dual disorder. I thought maybe it was a religious organization and I wanted no part of it. This made it harder for me to attend six trial meetings, as my therapist had suggested.

But somehow—my higher power perhaps?—I stuck with it and I have since learned differently. I’ve learned that to recover, all I need to do is believe two things: that I cannot recover on my own and that something else can help me. For instance, some people consider the group itself a higher power and some use a friend or sponsor. Knowing this, I can work Step Two and continue in my spiritual recovery.

I will draw a picture or write a brief description of my higher power.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

Practice is the best instruction of them all.

~ Publilius Syrus ~

Rome wasn’t built in a day, and recovery doesn’t happen overnight. Some newcomers look too far ahead and get discouraged when they realize all the work a sound recovery program requires. But it’s really very simple. We learn a few important basics, and then practice, practice, practice. Just like playing the piano or driving a car, we get the essentials first, and then practice until we perfect them.

Consistency is important. We don’t become abstinent by cutting down on our addiction; it’s all or nothing. We can’t claim to be honest by lying only on occasion; we’re either dishonest or we’re honest. We won’t learn forgiveness by keeping certain names on our hate list, or making amends to just a few. And we can’t learn the principles of our Twelve Step program by attending meetings once in a while; we must make a firm commitment to put our program above all other concerns and honor that commitment.

Soon the right thing is our first choice, without much effort, and with no pain at all. And one day we realize our practice has paid off in a whole new life.

Today help me practice being the kind of person I want to be Help me earn my own respect.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

We are not unlike a particularly hardy crustacean…. With each passage from one stage of human growth to the next we, too, must shed a protective structure.

~ Gail Sheehy ~

In his book First You Have to Row a Little Boat, author Richard Bode reflects on his passion for boating. Looking back from the vantage point of adulthood, he discovers that a little boat from his childhood provided him not only with great experience in learning how to navigate the ocean, but also in learning how to move through life. “God gave the wind,” he writes. “I didn’t pick the wind; that was imposed by a power far greater than myself. But I had to sail the wind… until it led me at last to a sheltered cove.”

There are silent currents that flow in and out of each day that may send you in directions you had not in-tended or anticipated. Resolve to stay calm if things do not go the way you planned or hoped for. Resolve to be one with your Higher Power and to use the strength you receive to navigate any disruptions.

I will choose to face life today with a serene spirit and calm poise. I will not fight the winds of change, but instead sail them with ease into safe harbors.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

More important than learning how to recall things is finding ways to forget things that are cluttering the mind. Before going to sleep at night, empty your consciousness of unwanted things, even as you empty your pockets.

~ Eric Butterworth ~

Many of us may make lists of things we need to do. We may refer to a calendar for our scribbled notations of places to go and people to see. We may look over our course syllabus for chapters to read or papers to write. Or we may keep it all in our heads, mentally checking off each item as it’s done.

But tonight we can put away the lists, close the calendar book, put away the course syllabus, and empty our minds of obligations, tasks, and duties. Unless we want to keep our heads spinning during a sleepless night, we must learn to turn off the achieving and doing sides of our minds and give room to the relaxing and spiritual sides. We can take away the items cluttering our minds, one at a time. Tomorrow will arrive in its own time; tonight is the time for us to relax.

Tonight I can close my eyes and visualize putting aside each item. I will achieve total relaxation and peace.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Being sick and tired

We get sick and tired of blaming others for our faults. We get sick and tired of running the show. We get sick and tired of trying to impress people. We are sick and tired of being sick and tired.

We need only remember that when anything gets to be too much, when we get sick and tired of anything, God is always ready to help to take it from us.

Am I feeling sick and tired about anything now?

Higher Power, help me turn things over to you before I get that sick and tired feeling.

Today I will ask my Higher Power to take over two problems.
They are

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Earth’s the right place for love.

~ ROBERT FROST ~

Newcomer

I have to get up early in the morning, so I don’t like hanging around after evening meetings. I always thank the speaker, but then I leave pretty quickly, so that I won’t get caught in one of those long, drawn-out conversations, miss out on sleep, and feel tired the next day. I do feel a little funny leaving, though, almost as if I’m sneaking out.

Sponsor

I wonder if you’re leaving early because you don’t have a second to spare, or for some other reason. There’s a happy medium, somewhere between a long, drawn-out conversation and sneaking out. Saying hello, sharing some hugs or handshakes, exchanging phone numbers with someone we’d like to talk to later, or briefly joining the crew that’s putting away chairs are some of the simple ways of feeling more like a part of things.

For me, making genuine contact with my peers in recovery is essential. When I was in early recovery, I called myself “shy” or “too busy” when in truth I was wary of people, even somewhat frightened. I chose to sit at the edge of things, then blamed others for my belief that I was an outsider. Becoming willing to set limits, to say no confidently when I needed to, freed me to enjoy getting to know others.

To be at ease in a group of people doesn’t always come naturally, but it’s one of the most important areas of recovery.

Today, I make good use of time by reaching out to people.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

Criticism is often the sincerest form of flattery. We are all subject to it at times if we do anything at all. When criticism does arise, and before you build up a first rate resentment, think first—who is it that criticizes? What is the motive behind it? Is it constructive or just plain antagonistic? Is it prompted by jealousy or ignorance? Would you do the same thing again if you had it to do over? What does your conscience say about it?

No great man escaped having enemies; all the old masters had critics; all political and social reforms had their adversaries and the early disciples of all new religions were persecuted, stoned and crucified.

If you are criticized you may possibly be right, but if you are ignored you know you are wrong.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) We fear the things we want the most.

2) GOD: Go On Dreaming

3) If you are eating a **** sandwich, chances are, you ordered it.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

First Things First

Dear Higher Power, remind me:
To tidy up my own mind,
To keep my sense of values straight,
To sort out the possible and the impossible,
To turn the impossible over to You,
And get busy on the possible.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

BEAR HUGS KETTLE

There is an anecdote of the Far West that carries a wonderful lesson. It appears that a party of hunters, being called away from their camp, left the campfire unattended, with a kettle of water boiling on it.

Presently an old bear crept out of the woods, and, seeing the kettle with its lid dancing about on top, promptly seized it. The boiling water scalded him badly; but instead of dropping the kettle instantly, he proceeded to hug it tightly—this being a bear’s idea of defense. Of course, the tighter he hugged it the more it burned him; the more it burned him the tighter he hugged it; and so on in a vicious circle, to the undoing of the bear.

This illustrates perfectly the way in which many people hug their difficulties to their bosoms by constantly rehearsing them to themselves and others.

Whenever you catch yourself thinking about your grievances, say to yourself sternly: “Bear hugs kettle,” and think about God instead. You will be surprised how quickly some long-standing wounds will heal.

Mine eyes are ever toward the Lord . . . (Psalm 25:15).

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Ain’t No Future in the Past

Don’t let the past remind us of what we are not now.

~ from the song, “Suite: Judy Blue Eyes,” by Stephen Stills ~

The last time I had seen Cora, she was a weak, heavily medicated chronic asthma patient who labored to walk from her living room to her bathroom. She had literally died in the hospital and been revived. When Cora showed up at my seminar a year later, I was amazed to see that she had lost a great deal of weight, gotten free of her medication, and looked vital and radiant.

When, during the seminar, the attendees were slated to hike up a mountain, I worried that this moderate trek would be too much for Cora, and I suggested she take a more gentle walk. Instead, she began to lead the group up the mountain! She set a dynamic pace, and the rest of the participants had to hustle to keep up with her. Was this the same woman, I wondered, whose family had been advised by doctors to say their good-byes to her?

No, it was not the same woman. The sick woman I remembered had died and been resurrected as healthy. It was only in my thoughts that I maintained a distorted image of an ill Cora. I was trying to stuff a new and expanded being into a tiny box to which I consigned her in my mind.

Cora’s transformation offers a profound model of the way we keep each other bound to our past—and can liberate ourselves to be entirely new in the present. We must be open to being new and seeing new; otherwise we freeze our friends and ourselves as we were, and we die to the life and power of the moment. Our only hope to truly live is to release our past in favor of the now moment. Ever since I saw Cora master that mountain, I’ve realized that anything is possible—if we let it be.

Help me to see anew today. Exchange everything that was, for everything that could be.

Infinite possibilities are available to me now. I accept the best as reality.