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February 25

Step by Step

Today, admit that I abused, misused, took for granted and literally threw away through my drinking and actions all that I had been GIVEN unconditionally – love, respect, self-respect, integrity, friends, family, innocence – and traded it for selfishness, insecurity, fear, regret, pain, agony, anguish, loss and time that will never be recovered. Now, I am forced to admit I cannot expect to be given what I drank away that once was mine – nor should I be enabled in regaining what I lost – without working for it. And I have the tools to begin the rebuilding process, courtesy of AA. So simple! But the work to apply those tools forces me to ask my higher power, on bent knees, for the strength, courage, honesty, discipline, integrity and selflessness to earn back – not demand nor expect them to be handed to me – what I have lost. And, if I do the job right, I may get back more than I lost. Today, I accept I must remake myself and, with the program, I’ve got the tools to do it. All that remains is my choice to pick them up and put them to use. Today, I pick them up and begin the rebuilding process. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

THE TENTH PROMISE

We will instinctively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us.

~Big Book ~

By using such slogans as “Easy Does It,” “One Day at a Time,” “Together We Can Do What I Can’t,” we find solutions for problems that seemed unsolvable before. By working the Steps, we learn to face up to and solve the problems of everyday living that used to cause us to seek relief in our addictions.

We no longer have doubts about our ability to do for ourselves what we once expected others to do for us. If we don’t know the answers, we know we can find them by asking the advice of fellow members who have faced the same problems.

The instincts which once compelled us toward our addiction have been redirected toward solving problems during recovery. We are confident that there are solutions to all problems, including some we haven’t faced yet. We no longer have to dodge what we used to feel were certain failures.

I use the tools built by those who have already experienced the problems I am facing for the first time.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Why not go out on a limb? Isn’t that where the fruit is?

~ Frank Scully ~

From the day we are born, our lives are risky. We may be intimidated by a task or a challenge before us. Working on some of the Twelve Steps is a risk. When we face these challenges, we can draw courage from looking at other risks we have taken and perhaps even enjoyed. For instance, most sports are exciting and thrilling because they play on the possibility of winning or losing. Falling in love is a risk. Climbing a mountain is a risk. Building something with our hands is a risk. Yet we enjoy the pleasure of stepping Into these risks. Taking a risk makes us feel alive.

When we think about these enjoyable adventures, where risks add to the excitement, we can use that feeling as a model for approaching the risks that we avoid. Perhaps we need to talk to our wife or partner about something that is hard to say. Perhaps we need to make amends to someone for a past wrong and we don’t know how we will be received. Perhaps our greatest challenge is to subdue our own will for something and give it over to the care of our Higher Power.

Today I will recall the risks that make me feel alive and move forward with those things I have been avoiding.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

No one can tell you which choices to make. We can only show you by good example.

~ Jan Pishok ~

We are attracted to men and women who share their wisdom and their hope freely, to people whose behavior reflects thoughtfulness of others. We recognize the love that radiates from some people as they enter a room or speak to others. We are nil creating examples for others in every move we make.

One of the first principles we learned about recovery was that this is a program of “attraction rather than promotion.” Though we may not have understood the meaning initially, we now appreciate how valuable that principle is. None of us like to be told what to do. Even when we ask for advice, we seldom really want it. But we can willingly follow the example someone sets, particularly 11 the outcome was successful. Let’s learn from the good example of others. Let’s be good examples as well

I am someone’s example for healthy behavior today. I won’t steer anyone wrong.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I can pray again

I used to dislike praying. Out of anger and fear I could hardly imagine a higher power. I was afraid of prayer’s silence, afraid to be alone with my thoughts and feelings. Prayer seemed mysterious and tied up with religion. I don’t think I believed in it.

In recovery, all this has changed. I see my higher power as accepting and caring. The fear of silence and solitude has been lifted. Slowly, through doubting and testing, I have come to believe in prayer. It is simple, personal, and powerful. For my return to prayer, I am grateful.

I will set a time and talk with my higher power today.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

One of the hardest things to find in life is fun people.
Far too few appear and seemingly fewer survive adulthood.

~ Sr. Karol A. Jankowski ~

Fun is something we all deserve to have a lot of. In fact, we can never have enough honest, down- to-earth fun. Nothing brightens our days like a deep belly laugh with a playful friend. What a relief to feel safe and accepted enough to throw our heads back and laugh.

Fun and laughter are life’s natural antidotes for stress and worry. Some days we seem to be affected with a dreadful condition called Chronic Seriousness. Chronic Seriousness spreads gloom and depression and paints our days into a black, cheerless corner. How tiring to be faced by this darkness in ourselves and others.

Today, our challenge is to be fun people and trust our right to laugh, play, and feel good. Fun and laughter are contagious. The more we open ourselves up to good humor, the more we find our family, friends, and co-workers having fun right along with us.

Today let me laugh, play, and be willing to have a good time.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

I have always delighted at the prospect of a new day, a fresh try, one more start…

~ Joseph Priestley ~

Just as you begin your day washing yesterday’s residue from your body, so too is it vitally important to begin each new day with a similar cleansing of your mind and spirit. That is because your mind and spirit can become warehouses for stored up fears, doubts, insecurities, anger, stress, and pain.

The beginning of the day presents an ideal time to en-gage in physical, mental, and spiritual cleansing so you can start anew, cleansed, and centered. In the same amount of time as it takes to shower, you can connect with your Higher Power and use the tools of the recovery program to strengthen your spirit.

Each morning set aside time to engage in stillness, quiet reflection, meditation, and prayer. Imagine the life you wish to experience and summon the strength of your convictions to make what you have imagined come true. Ask your Higher Power to bless the image you have created and to give you the power to hold onto that image throughout the day. Through regular cleansing of your mind and spirit, you can approach each day filled with energy, poise, and confidence.

I begin the day connecting with my Higher Power. My Higher Power will help cleanse my soul and free my spirit.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

Love doesn’t just sit there, like a stone; it has to be made, like bread, remade all the time, made new.

~ Ursula K. Leguin ~

In the first phases of a relationship, everything is new and exciting. It seems as though nothing could ever go wrong.

Yet as we move out of this “honeymoon” phase of the relationship, problems begin. Suddenly we notice things about the other person that bother us. We seem to have more disagreements and more difficulties that take longer to solve. We may even silently choose corners, put up walls, and back away from each other.

It’s easy at this stage to want to end the relationship. But now is when the outcome of the relationship is most critical. If we run away from renewing our love and rebuilding the foundations of trust and faith in each other, we will deprive our love of its nourishment for growth. Love takes constant work and needs plenty of patience. Each day can reveal a new layer of love; each stage in a relationship moves us to a new plateau. But only if we are willing.

I can look at my relationships and see the potential for growth. Help me renew my feelings of love through faith.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Holding on and letting go

We had a great deal of tenacity, except that we were holding on to destructive behaviors and attitudes: resentments and self-pity, drugs and other bad habits.

We must reassign this tenacity to what is realistic and what sustains us in life, then hold on carefully (like holding a newborn kitten).

Am I holding on to more of the good things?

Higher Power, help me let go of the fear that keeps me from letting go of my defects.

The good things I will hold on to today are

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Things are in the saddle, And ride mankind.

~ RALPH WALDO EMERSON ~

Newcomer

I have a life, not just this program. Work deadlines, family obligations, bills, things I have to get done. I have a lot of responsibility, and it isn’t going to go away just because I’m in recovery. And now I have all these new things I’m supposed to do: meetings, phone calls, literature, Steps. I desperately need some time off to catch up with my real life.

Sponsor

When I was active in my disease, time was my enemy. Sometimes I let obligations slide until a situation felt desperate. Sometimes I threw myself into my duties, worked without stopping, then burned out. Recovery offers me a simple way to deal with responsibilities: one day at a time.

Maintaining recovery by attending a meeting, making a call, and reading literature—things we do to stay sober today—takes less time than the hours we spent pursuing our addictions, indulging in them, being slowed down or stopped by them. Working on things consistently, even just a little each day, produces results in all areas of life. I no longer resent time for recovery, any more than I resent the need for food and sleep. When we take time to recharge our batteries, we renew energy for the chores of our lives, become more focused and productive. In this way, surprisingly, our recovery actually gives us time.

Nothing’s so urgent that I can’t sit through a meeting, talk to my sponsor, or take a moment to pray. As I nourish my recovering self, I have more to offer work and relationships. Today, time is on my side.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

Few of us who are successfully working the AA Program have failed to notice the almost immediate influence our sobriety has brought about, not only in our homes and jobs, but in the community as well.

Some of us who a short time ago stood before the judge and got the usual “ten dollars or ten days,” are now frequently closeted in the Judge’s Chambers at his invitation to assist him in his handling of the alcoholic problem.

We know what we were, we know what we are, now let us be what we can be.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) More will be Revealed

2) If you are having trouble believing in a power greater than yourself, just try believing in a power other than yourself.

3) When what one needs to do becomes what one wants to do, change becomes simple.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Do the Right Thing

Help me, Higher Power, to get out of myself, to stop always thinking what I need. Show me the way I can be helpful to others and supply me with the strength to do the right thing.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

REGISTER JOY

The principle revelation of the Jesus Christ teaching is the omnipresence and availability of God, and the belief that God not only transcends His universe but is everywhere immanent in it—that He indwells in it.

If you really believe in the existence of God you should be happy and cheerful. God has all power, and God is good; so life must be good too.

Meet the world with a smile. You owe this to God, to your fellows, and above all else to yourself. If you go about with a face like an east wind what can you possibly expect to attract from this world? We all know people who carry a fixed, frozen mirthless, almost professional, smile. Such a smile is just a permanent wave in the face.

Smile, even if it takes a little effort, and even if it takes a little effort, and keep it up until it becomes spontaneous, as it will. In the graphic language of Hollywood, register joy, and hold it!

For ye shall go out with joy . . . (Isaiah 55:12)

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

For Your Own Sake, Forgive

Holding resentment is like eating poison and then waiting for the other person to keel over.

~ Anonymous ~

As a massage therapist in a hospital, Irene was assigned to give physical therapy to a cancer patient who, according to the doctors’ prognosis, had but a short time to live. While Irene was treating Mrs. Harmon, she asked the elderly woman about the pain in her life. “My greatest sorrow is that I have not spoken to my sister in 20 years,” lamented Mrs. Harmon. When Irene encouraged the woman to talk about her long-held resentment, Mrs. Harmon burst into tears, reporting how hard it had been to hold a grudge against her sister, whom she truly loved. The two women embraced, and Mrs. Harmon reported that she felt relieved.

The following week when Irene returned to the hospital, she was surprised to find Mrs. Harmon dressed, wearing makeup, and looking significantly healthier. “Where are you going?” asked Irene.

“Home, darling,” Mrs. Harmon answered. “When they took me in for x-rays, they found no sign of cancer.”

When we hold on to anger, hurt, or resentment, we only hurt ourselves. By withholding love from another, we deny it to ourselves. If you keep someone in prison with your thoughts, you have to sit at their jail door to keep them from escaping, and thus become a prisoner yourself.

To free another is to free yourself. When you give the gift of release, your spirit is healed.

Lift all negativity; resentment, and sense of victimhood from my heart I want to recreate my relationships to reflect only love, honor, and healing.

I give freedom and I am free.