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June 12

Step by Step

"When we became alcoholics, crushed by a self-imposed crisis we could not postpone or evade, we had to fearlessly face the proposition that either God is everything or else He is nothing. God either is, or He isn't. What was our choice to be?" - Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, Ch 4 ("We Agnostics"), p 53.

Today, if asked by an agnostic or atheist how I know a higher power exists, what will be my answer? Because the program suggests surrender to a power greater than ourselves, I need only look into my yesterdays to understand that the power of alcohol was greater than me and, if something can be so strong as to knock me into the deepest and darkest of gutters, can there not be a power that can lift me to heights I have never reached? If this comparison of polar entities does not strike a cord, I need only remember that I already know the power of alcohol - and it took from me literally everything. Maybe on blind faith I can at least hope - if not believe - that something adverse is more powerful, strong enough to at least give me courage to start anew. What have I got to lose? Today, I seek the courage to make a leap of faith and seek a power stronger than alcohol. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

FRUSTRATION

Nothing is unthinkable, nothing impossible to the balanced person, provided it arises out of the needs of life and is dedicated to life's further developments.

~ Lewis Mumford ~

In recovery we walk one foot in front of the other. We live life One Day at a Time. We Live and Let Live. These slogans we have in the Program help with the frustrations we experience in everyday living. The fact of the matter is, most of us have spent so many years forcing our will on each situation that it is difficult to stop

It takes practice and patience to slow down and let life come to us, rather than rushing off to "make things happen." Our Higher Power has a sense of time and timing that will be revealed to us slowly. Frustration will not move a clock forward, change a traffic light from red to green, or make us younger. Frustration will only block our serenity.

The Steps teach me that it is sometimes necessary to do absolutely nothing. I can hear better when I am quiet.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

When the truth is told lovingly, with insight and compassion, you can say anything.

~ Shawnee Undell ~

There are times when we know something, or we have a difficult thing to say to someone, and we can’t see how we could possibly speak it. Perhaps today our spouse or dear friend has done something we feel upset about, or perhaps someone at work is doing something that we need to discuss with him or her.

When we have a hard message to deliver, we don’t have to speak it harshly. We can say almost anything to someone if we can put our arm around that person, figuratively speaking. Naturally, we can’t always expect to be received with open arms when our message is hard to hear. A sensitive or painful truth sometimes is the valuable gift that only we as friends can deliver. We don’t even have to be right; what is required it that we are sincere.

Today I will look for loving and compassionate ways to say my truth.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

I only have to be what I am, no more, no less.

~ Robbie Rocheford ~

Feeling that we are not good enough is common among women everywhere, not just among those of us who are in recovery. Often we wonder how we first got this feeling of inadequacy. We search our memories for experiences and people to blame. Other people’s expectations, our shame, and the searing events of the past no doubt left an imprint on us. We are, unquestionably, the sum and substance of all we have known.

What we need to know today is that we are unconditionally loved and accepted just as we are, not only by the friends who surround us now but also by our Higher Power. We are learning to recognize the boundaries between us and those walking our path; this empowers us to let go of others’ judgments and be more accepting of ourselves.

It gives me real joy to believe that I am okay. By affirming this belief often, I will imprint it on my mind.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I am slowly accepting myself

With my dual disorder it seems I have lost some of my abilities. I can’t concentrate, sleep, or remember as well these days. There are times I can't go to work, eat my regular foods, or even drive a car.

I can’t do much of anything except work on my recovery. That's hard-but it's also good. Because in my heart I know that recovery is what I need to concentrate on. As I get stronger, I trust that much of my life will fall back into place again.

I will write out an affirmation that says, "I accept the way I am these days." I could even say it out loud, looking at myself in the mirror.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

Loneliness is caused by an alienation from life.
It is a loneliness from your real self.

~ Maxwell Maltz ~

There is a vast difference between being alone and being lonely. To be alone but in touch with ourselves can be very rewarding. But to many of us, the isolation and alienation we feel in our loneliness are devastating. To feel that we have no one, not even ourselves to depend on, can lead to despair.

Belonging to a group that shares our pain and has lived through our experiences will help end our isolation from ourselves. A Twelve Step group validates our feelings, shares our grief, helps us learn to love and trust our Higher Power, and shares our hope for the future. A group can also be the source for a sponsor, someone we can always go to. Instead of feeling different, as we have for so long, in our group we have a place to feel a part of others, and to accept ourselves.

Continuing to be a part of this fellowship, we learn how to accept who we are, and we learn that being alone with our true self can be a creative and joyful process in recovery.

Today help me be grateful for all those who so freely give of their love and support.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

Efficiency is intelligent laziness.

~ David Dunham ~

The invention of the modern sandwich is attributed to John Montagu, the Fourth Earl of Sandwich. As the story goes, Montagu was hungry but did not want to stop playing cards. He ordered his servant to bring him meat between two slices of bread so his fingers would not get greasy and he could continue to gamble while eating.

Whether truth or legend, what is considered to be accurate is that Montagu held a number of important positions of power throughout his lifetime. Yet he was viewed as so incompetent and corrupt that it was suggested his epitaph read, “Seldom has any man held so many offices and accomplished so little.”

Do you approach your recovery with determination, or with laziness? After attending 90 meetings in 90 days, you may begin tapering off from such diligence. Upon completion of your work on one of the Steps, you may focus your attention outside the program. Or as you accumulate days free from your habit, you may go about your day-to-day life thinking you are “cured.”

Recovery requires your time and attention. It requires you to do all of the work necessary to develop your knowledge and skills so that you can become not just a sober person, but a better person.

Today I will do the work I need to do in recovery.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

Use what talents you have; the woods would have little music if no birds sang their song except those who sang best.

~ Rev. Oliver G. Wilson ~

The perfectionist in all of us gives us some pretty harsh criticism. It tells the photographer in us we'll never be Ansel Adams. It tells the writer in us we'll never be Charles Dickens. It tells the businessperson in us we'll never be Henry Ford. It tells the parent in us we'll never have the perfect family.

This perfectionist has an uncanny way of making us feel inferior to all who have gone before us. Such condemnations may hurt our creativity and abilities so much that we decide to give up trying to be good at anything. So we fail before we begin.

How do we know we won't be good at what we do? We certainly won't be Ansel Adams or anybody else because they've already existed. But we can be ourselves and use our talents to do our best. We may become famous and successful, or we may not. But we won't know unless we try. With our talents and determination, we can achieve splendid things. But we won't know unless we try.

What are my talents? I can develop these talents not in imitation of another but with curiosity about what I can do.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Letting go of our defects

We’re not like everyone else. We demand attention. We would die if we found out we’re not the center of a few lives. We want reassurances that we’re coming across as the generous, honorable people we are striving to become, but we soon realize that character defects and self-centeredness still plague us.

When we get a glimpse from time to time of how others see us, it can be a dreadful, painful experience. If it weren’t for the loving attitude of our fellow addicts, many of us could not endure it. But the growth process is worth the pain as we find out that we’re gradually becoming the generous, honorable people that we want to be.

Am I letting go of my defects?

Higher Power, help me to see myself as I truly am to begin to let go of my character defects.

Today I will work on self-centeredness by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Above all, anger needs to be felt so it can be talked through, understood and integrated, rather than acted out. In this way, it cleanses the self.

~ TIAN DAYTON ~

Newcomer

Today I felt so angry at someone who was chattering on and on that I just wanted to smash something. I hardly even know this person, and I have no idea why I feel such fury or what to do about it.

Sponsor

Anger isn’t necessarily logical. Sometimes a little thing, a seemingly harmless word or a look, ignites anger that is al-ready inside us. In the early days of my recovery, this happened so frequently that I began to sense that I was constantly carrying a load of anger; it didn’t take much to set it off. My sponsor said, “Of course you’re angry—you can’t have your addictive substance anymore!”

Wherever it comes from, we don’t have to deny our anger or judge it. But going over and over it, feeding it, letting it turn into an obsession, can be painful. There are many safe ways to discharge anger without hurting our-selves or others: we can share it at a meeting or with a counselor; we can write about it, or we can get some good physical exercise, like running or vigorous walking, to release tension and keep things flowing through us.

Whether or not my anger makes sense today, I don’t deny it and I don’t whip it up. I acknowledge it, and I find a safe setting in which to release it.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

If we mean it when we say “Thy will be done,” then what God wills is what we will. Happy and sober will be the man or woman who aquires this frame of mind.

If you want all your prayers answered your way, then let your way be God’s way.

Too frequently we get God and Santa Claus mixed up.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

PEACE IN OUR HEARTS

Our Creator, show us the way of patience, tolerance,
And kindness. Grant us power in our love,
Strength in our humility,
Clarity in our thinking,
Purity in our zeal,
Sincerity in our purpose,
Kindness in our laughter,
Value in our gratitude,
Compassion in our friendships,
And Your peace in our hearts at all times.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

USE WHAT YOU HAVE

Many people say to me, "l want to get on faster. I want more understanding." And as a rule they go on to ask for a list of books to read or some "advanced course" that they can take.

This attitude is quite mistaken. It implies that spiritual advancement is a question of intellectual activity-of the mere accretion of knowledge. That is true in the study of mathematics, or of physics, or chemistry, but it is not true in metaphysics' Spiritual growth comes from putting into practice the knowledge we already possess. Instead of reading another book, read your favorite book once more and apply it more carefully than ever in your practical life.

Metaphysics, like music, is both a science and an art. In metaphysics it is absolutely true that you learn by doing.

. . . be ye doers of the word, and not hearers only . . . (James 1:22).

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Tigers or Strawberries

The past is a cancelled check, the future is a promissory note, and the present is cash in hand.

~ Anonymous ~

A man being chased by wild tigers scurried down a vine hanging over the edge of a cliff. Looking down, he saw two more hungry tigers waiting for him at the bottom of the vine. Unable to move backward or forward, he noticed a succulent, ripe red strawberry growing out of the side of the cliff near him. He smiled, plucked the fruit, and enjoyed the sweetest strawberry he had ever tasted.

While our past and future seem to threaten us, we can take refuge in the current moment. Anxiety springs from regret or resentment over past events or fear of anticipated pain. When we relax into the now moment, we are not vulnerable to the past or future, and we discover that eternity is a golden necklace strung of an infinite number of present moments. We can live quite well on fresh strawberries.

Help me to relax into the beauty of now.

I open my eyes and heart to the miracle of now, and leave time behind.