[bluidkiti]

September 11

Step by Step

"We must learn to walk before we can run. That's why we have these slogans. I use that 'Easy Does It' every day, to slow me down a little. I have to watch myself all the time. So I don't just take the inventory at night - I take it continually throughout the day. Before I step out and do anything, I stop and check it over first, and then let my conscience be my guide.
'For me, AA has become a way of life." - Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, "They Lost Nearly All," Ch 8 ("Desperation Drinking"), p 516.

Today, talking the talk isn't enough, nor is walking the walk. Both have to be in my soul, spirit, character and mind if I have any chance of a meaningful, serene, peaceful and honest recovery. Nor is the quality of my recovery truly measured when I am dry and life is generally good. It is measured when life situations arise that require practical but diligent application of the steps. Even if I emerge from those situations sober but my reaction and response to those situations do not meet the program's standards, I need another 10th Step. Today, I may talk the talk and walk the walk, but if AA has not become a way of life in all I say, do and feel, I start working again on talking the talk, walking the walk and feeling the feeling. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

REFLECTION

Those who ask receive. Those who seek will find. And to those who knock, the door will be opened.

~ Matthew ~

Prayer is seeking answers and direction in life. Meditation is listening for answers from a Higher Power and developing the faith within us to accept those answers. Reflection is the study of ways to change the answers we get from prayer and meditation into action.

Reflection is the study of the meaning and uses of the Twelve Steps. It is not snap judgment. It requires consideration of the pros and cons of our possible choices and determination of what directions we will take to give us the best results.

The progress of spirituality from prayer to meditation to reflection is active, not passive. It is taking part in the joy of putting the results of prayer and meditation into action.

I have learned through times of quiet reflection to work into my life the answers my Higher Power has given me as a result of my prayer and meditation.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

I don’t have to be what you want me to be.

~ Muhammad Ali ~

We only truly become ourselves from the inside out. During our active addiction many of us tried so hard to please others that we lost any sense of who we were, or we created an external image that would get others to like us. Some of us lost ourselves in codependently taking care of others. So much focus on others never led us to know ourselves or truly develop our interior private self.

This program, with its twelve suggested Steps, is really a road map for the formation of a true self. At the beginning we may feel empty inside, as if hardly any self exists. But at least some small, undeveloped self is always there, and it will grow. By taking inventory of ourselves, by becoming accountable for our actions, and by developing our spirituality, we become truly whole.

Today I will be the person I know from inside myself and not try to create an image to please others.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

Instead of worrying about being different from others, I will love myself for being unique.

~ Kelley Vickstrom ~

Where did we learn to compare ourselves with other women? Why is the process so seductive? We seldom measure up, in our eyes. Every woman we see, at first glance, seems smarter or wittier, and certainly more attractive. Self-doubt sets in again and again. Those few times we “win” the comparison test, we feel smug, but the victory is short-lived because another woman soon enters our space.

Meditating often about the gift of uniqueness that our birth guaranteed will bring us closer to understanding that gift. Why would God have made us all unique unless we were here to handle a very special assignment? At first this may not seem realistic. But think for a moment of the women you know in recovery. Are they setting identical goals for their lives? Do they think and act exactly alike? Our lives may be complementary and we may be walking similar paths, but our assignments are unique. God needs each of us for the divine picture to be whole.

I am who I need to be to fulfill my role in this divine world. What I have to offer is important.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I am coming out of hiding

I used to believe that given a chance, most people would only hurt me or use me. I could not trust them. I could not ask anything of them. So I kept to myself. Being alone was one way I could feel safe.

But these days I am learning that being alone and afraid and untrusting won't help me recover from my dual disorder. What does help, among other things, is when my counselor talks to me, asks me how I feel, listens to me, treats me with gentleness and respect. He helps me feel good about myself and shows me that people are not all bad. As I begin to find safe people and trust again, I gain faith that I will recover.

Today I will take a risk and ask a member of my support group if I can call him when I need support.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

Keep coming back. It works.

~ Program Saying ~

These words mean a lot to us. They remind us that our recovery program really does work.

When we feel doubt, it helps to think back to where we were before recovery. Our drinking, drugging, gambling, compulsive eating, or starving was out of control. The pain we felt was indescribable, although we denied it at the time.

Now, when someone says, “Keep coming back, it works,” the words remind us why we are coming back — to get the love, understanding, and support that we need to keep our lives sane and spiritually sound.

It isn’t easy. We often lose track of where we are. We are tempted to go back to the old ways. But we can’t. We’ve had a taste of real spirituality, and we yearn for more. Knowing the program works keeps us coming back for the love and support we need to recover one day at a time.

Today help me remember that my life is so much better than when I was using. Thank You for the gift of recovery and my new life.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

Do what you can, with what you have, where you are.

~ Theodore Roosevelt ~

A Chinese parable tells of a humble man who daily carried water from a stream to his home. He used two pots—one balanced on each end of a pole—to carry the water. One pot was perfect; the other had a crack in it. The perfect pot was proud of its ability. But the cracked pot was ashamed of its flaw. One day the cracked pot spoke as the man was filling it. “Why haven’t you thrown me away?” it asked.

The man silently placed the cracked pot on his pole and slowly began the walk back to his home. Finally, he spoke, “Little cracked pot, please look along your side of the path. What do you see?”

“Flowers,” the cracked pot answered.

If “That is correct,” said the man. “Each spring I plant flower seeds on your side of the path. Every day when we walk back to my home, your leak helps to water the seeds. Now there are flowers, which I can take home and put on my table. Without you being the way you are, there would not be beauty that I can enjoy on my journey home.”

Today I will see value and beauty in all that I am and all that I do.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

Our belief at the beginning of a doubtful undertaking is the one thing that insures the successful outcome of our venture.

~ William James ~

How often have we heard ourselves say, “Well, I'll try, but I probably won't do it right." We're setting ourselves up for defeat, right from the start. With that much negative energy, certainly our ventures will turn out just the way we predicted. If pessimists had always been right, we would be living differently. We might still believe the world is flat, because Columbus wouldn't have taken his voyage. We might still be reading by candlelight, because Edison wouldn't have invented the light bulb. It would take us days to cross the country, because the Wright brothers would have believed only birds can fly.

Some things we do will succeed, and some will fail. But in order to make successes happen, we need to believe they can occur. And we also need to believe in ourselves, believe that we can make things happen. Since we've lived for so long without faith in ourselves, what will it hurt to give it a try?

Higher Power, help me fill my mind tonight with thoughts of success and a belief in myself.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Making mistakes

As addicts we made a lot of mistakes; as addicts, we blanketed those mistakes in denial. Clean and sober, denial is no longer an option. Yet we still make plenty of mistakes.

But mistakes are okay, because we’re learning that every situation, good or bad, is an opportunity for growth. And with the right attitude, we can make the most of it.

Can I let go of my mistakes enough to learn from them?

Higher Power, help me to forgive my mistakes and to accept them as a useful way to learn.

Today I will practice what I learned from my most recent mistake by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

I accept reality and dare not question it.

~ WALT WHITMAN ~

Newcomer

I keep hearing that acceptance is the key to being happy. I think I'm still a long way from accepting myself just the way I am.

Sponsor

In my own early recovery I was able to admit pretty quickly that I was powerless over my addiction; accepting that fact was a different story, however. For people like us, acceptance isn't likely to come overnight. Even when we've begun to get a feel for it, we need to maintain it a day at a time.

Accepting that we are alcoholics, addicts, compulsive overeaters, debtors, gamblers—whatever our addictions or compulsions—involves more than simply becoming aware that a particular craving has been in charge of our lives. It means unreservedly accepting that we have a disease for which there is treatment and reprieve, but no cure. Our lives themselves, and our potential for serenity and freedom, depend on this acceptance.

Acceptance means that when I come home from work feeling tired and thinking I'd like to skip my usual meeting and watch TV instead, I eat my supper and head for the meeting. It means I don't take time off from recovery for good behavior. It means keeping recovery at the top of my list of priorities, continuing to make daily use of the tools and suggestions that have brought relief and serenity in the past.

Today, I accept my addiction as a basic reality.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

We are attempting to build a new house on the site of the old wrecked one. The type of house we build will be determined by the plans, and specifications we select. Exactly the same materials can be used to build either a palace or a hovel; the difference will be chiefly one of design. The palace requires more material and a great deal more labor, however.

In your rebuilding be sure that the basement is DRY; the corners SOUARE: the walls UPRIGHT and TRUE, and your house will stand, even after you, the builder, are dead and gone.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Avoiding Gossip

God of Reason, help me be faithful to
placing principles before personalities
Before I gossip or find fault with others,
help me remember to ask myself'
Is it true?
Is it kind?
Is it useful?

If I can't answer yes to these questions,
I will not gossip.
Help me talk about principles, not personalities
This I pray.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

KEY WORDS IN THE BIBLE

WICKED

The word wicked occurs more than three hundred times in the Bible and is one of the most important terms to be found therein. In the Bible the word wicked really means "bewitched" or "under a spell." The Law of Being is perfect harmony, and that truth never changes, but man uses his free will to think wrongly, and thus he builds up false conditions around him, and then believes them to be real. They look real, and so he forgets that it was he himself who made them, and thus he bewitches himself, or throws himself under a kind of spell; and of course as long as he remains bewitched he has to suffer the consequences. Nevertheless, it is only illusion, or a spell, and it can be broken by turning to God.

The only way to break such a spell is to think of God. O foolish Galatians, who hath bewitched you . . . ? (Galatians 3:1), said Paul, when he heard that some of his students had begun to believe evil in this way. The wicked flee when no man pursueth (Proverbs 28:1).

Let us awaken from the spell under which the whole race lives, and know instead that God is all Power, infinite Intelligence, and boundless love.

Let the wicked forsake his way, and the unrighteous man his thoughts: and let him return unto the Lord, and he will have mercy upon him . . . (Isaiah 55:7).

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

The Choice for Happiness

Everyone is about as happy as they make up their mind to be.

~ Abraham Lincoln ~

Connie's mother-in-law was a very unhappy person. Among her many complaints, she griped that she hadn't been on a vacation in years. So Connie and her husband decided to give Mrs. Fraser a luxurious Caribbean cruise. "Perhaps this will give her a lift and let her know that she is loved!" the couple hoped. After Mrs. Fraser received the notice of the gift in the mail, the couple was surprised to receive a phone call from her turning down their offer. The present did not include a flight to Miami, where the cruise originated, and Mrs. Fraser did not want to have to pay the fare from South Carolina.

If someone is intent on being unhappy, you cannot make them happy. A negative mind will seize on any excuse to find fault; it will find the 1/50th of the glass that is empty, overlooking the other 49 parts.

It is not within your power to choose happiness for another person, nor is it your right or purpose. If you could, you would violate their free will; perhaps they chose this situation to help them reconsider how they are living, and ultimately choose a more rewarding path. You cannot afford to make your happiness dependent on another's. You can love, bless, nurture, suggest, support, give, and honor, but in the long run the only way the other person will be happy is if they choose to do so.

If you offer love or gifts to someone, and they are not received in the spirit of love, do not take it personally. The rejection is a statement of the person's pain, not your inadequacy. If you have tried for a long time to make certain people happy and have not succeeded, then just give love. Assume that they are where they need to be for a reason, and someday they will make another choice. In the meantime, be happy yourself.

I place my loved ones in Your care. I pray for their happiness, and I release them to choose.

I give happiness by nurturing peace within my own heart.