[bluidkiti]

May 13

Step by Step

" ...The alcoholic at certain times has no effective mental defense against the first drink. ...His defense must come from a Higher Power." - Alcoholics Anonymous, Third Edition, 1976, Ch 3, p 43.

Today, it is foolish at best and suicidal at worst to rely on my own defenses if the temptation for that mythical first drink rises up. My refuge and perhaps only defense is my faith, trust and loyalty to the higher power of my understanding. By His grace, may I internalize for the current 24 Hours my past as a drinking alcoholic to smash the lie of just one drink and reinforce that all my morning after's became progressively worse, never better. Let me remember just as much if not more that drinking, in the end, is a choice, that there are consequences for every choice I make and that I and only I will be responsible to those consequences. The question, then, is if I am willing to be responsible to the consequences of my choice to drink. My history is proof that the cost, for me, is too high. Today, I will not depend on myself to ward off the con of a first drink; instead, I will have faith in my higher power. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M.

**************************************************

~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

COURAGE

God, help me to remember that nothing is going to happen to me today that You and I can’t handle.

~ Anonymous ~

Courage is what makes us do the right thing even when nobody else is doing it. We can find happiness while surrounded by darkness; we can be loving in the middle of hate and envy, and serene when surrounded by chaos, fear, and anger.

The principles of our Program help us face impossible odds. We learn that any act of courage may produce future victory for ourselves and others. The courage which we want takes its strength from faith, not from bravery or physical strength.

Foolish, unthinkable courage, though, can be destructive to us or to others. Sensible courage never fails because it is made up of truth and faith.
Let truth and faith give me courage, so that when fear knocks, no one is there.

**************************************************

~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

You can’t control the wind, but you can adjust your sails.

~ Fortune cookie message ~

Sailing is both peaceful and adventurous. Imagine being on a sailboat, working the sails to use the wind for quiet, controlled movement or for exciting speed as you skim across the water. It’s a skill that improves with experience. You learn to work with the wind and apply it to your advantage. Anyone who tries to sail his boat willfully, contrary to the conditions of the wind, gets nowhere.

A well-lived life also draws on experience, and we continue to learn as long as we live. Our male models told us that masculinity meant conquering our surroundings, and many of us instinctively saw competition and confrontation as a matter of personal honor. We believed that, as men, our self-esteem was tied to subduing any obstacle before us. But those were a boy’s ideas about what a man is like.

As we grow wiser and genuinely stronger, we set our sails to work with the wind. We can neither stop the wind nor make it blow.

Today I will watch the winds in my life and work with them to live better.

**************************************************

~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

The truest measurement of my growth and accomplishments is in remembering where I came from, where I’ve been, and where I’m going.

~ Joan Rohde ~

Our daily routines can be so absorbing that we lose perspective on how we used to live. That’s okay. We need to be present to the moment. However, it benefits us to remember occasionally what our lives used to be like. Never getting too far from the insanity of our past helps us be grateful for the gifts that have become commonplace now.

We’ve grown as the result of recovery. For many of us, very little in our lives looks or feels the same. We have new friends, sober relationships, more self-esteem, and a positive direction.

A true gift of this new life is that we have hope. We know we can do great things. We know we lived through our traumas because we had not yet fulfilled our purpose, our part of God’s destiny. And we know we’ll get the guidance we need to fulfill that destiny if we remain committed to the program’s principles.

I am in a “growing” state of mind. My life is a rich and purposeful play directed by my Higher Power.

**************************************************

~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I am grateful for the Twelve Steps

Long ago I gave up my initial guide to living, the religion of my childhood. But the spiritual crisis of my dual disorder left me desperate, lost. I did not know what to do.

After a period of struggle, I found the Twelve Steps−and I am profoundly grateful. The Steps are spiritual, not religious. They are gentle, forgiving. They make it possible for me to recover. They help me accept myself and others. They help me live the kind of life I want. The Twelve Steps are at work in my life.

Today I will spend ten minutes reading about and thinking about this week’s Step.

*************************************************

~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

Passive-aggressive anger gives us ulcers and gives others mixed messages.

~ Ruth McKinnis ~

Our past addictive lives were often based on cover-up and denial of feelings. Some old habits die hard, and unresolved anger may creep back into the best of recovery programs. Unexplained bursts of anger may take us by surprise and make us wonder if we really are getting better. Finding ourselves faced with a string of daily irritations, we are now challenged to look deeper at what is really going on in our lives.

What might we be ignoring and covering up in our day-to-day living? Discovering the cause of passive-aggressive anger is a powerful tool that will let us live assertively with our feelings and then let go of them. We don’t have to let our feelings build. With help from our Higher Power and our Twelve Step program, we can work through the real cause of a problem.

It’s always better for us, and others, if we share our feelings rather than store them up till they burst out. In learning to do the next right thing, we learn to be assertive with our anger, and find real peace of mind.

Today let me learn to assertively share my feelings instead of covering them up.

**************************************************

~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

People need joy quite as much as clothing. Some of them need it far more.

~ Margaret Collier Graham ~

Have you ever met those who seem to emit a glow all around them? They seem to exude a brightness that illuminates even the darkest times. They can find the joy in most anything. When they walk into a room, you can al-most feel the burdens of those around them being lifted. These people are not the life of the party—they are the party! What makes some people have such a lightness of living? How can they always seem to be able to find the silver lining in any dark cloud?

Those who have this inner light have learned how to develop a sense of joy and wonder with the world. They are able to sift through what is important in life and what creates distractions so they can extract what is most beneficial to them and discard what is not.

You can develop a similar lightness within you—one that enables you to experience more joy in your life. You do this by developing the ability to pay greater attention to those things that provide you with the most benefit and positive energy, and less attention on petty arguments, silly conflicts, or meaningless distractions. You can then be joyful by keeping your life light, open, and free.

I will nurture the glow within me.

**************************************************

~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

We live on a moving line between past and future. That line is our lifeline.

~ George A. Buttrick ~

Live in the present is a good slogan for those of us who grew up in an alcoholic family because many of us find it hard to do. Sometimes it feels like everything we do is a result of the way we were brought up, and those memories can come flooding back no matter what we're doing. Our character defects, fears, actions, and defenses were all constructed before adulthood. These influence us in the present.

Because o[ our childhood, we are also future-oriented dreamers. We learned to look forward to times when our worries, fears, and pains would be gone. That always seemed to be tomorrow. Everything would be all right−tomorrow.

The past is behind us and the future lies ahead. We are learning the present isn't as painful, as fearful, or as uncomfortable as the past. We may look to the future for hope, but not to place all our faith into a future moment. The present is not so bad, as long as we remember it will never be repeated and our future will never be an unattainable fantasy.

I can place all my faith, trust, and hope in the present.

**************************************************

~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Being a friend

If we want to be miserable, let’s just think about ourselves. “I’m not getting what I want. That person doesn’t treat me right. I don’t deserve misfortune.” It’s easy to be miserable. But if we want happiness, we need to be a friend to someone.

Let’s all share our experience, strength, and hope. If we want to know God’s love, let us show love. If we want contentment and joy, let us walk and talk with God.

Do I bring happiness to others?

Higher Power, help me to show the love I have.

Today I will be a friend to

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

**************************************************

~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

The art of life is to show your hand.

~ C. V. LUCAS ~

Newcomer

I’ve been thinking about talking to another sponsor. Not to replace you—our relationship is important to me, and I get a lot from it—but in addition to you.

Sponsor

We’re lucky to have such an abundance of sober experience in this fellowship. There are many of us, and we can get to know people with various lengths of time in recovery, different experiences, different styles. Knowing others and having the willingness to let others know us is one of the keys to growing in recovery.

I support your wanting to enlarge your support system by taking on a second sponsor. There may be someone, for example, with whom you want to focus on spiritual matters.

Your expressing your desire for additional sponsorship gives us an opportunity to take a look at our own relation-ship. You may think that I won’t be able to understand a particular issue that’s troubling you. You may be worried about how much you’ve already shared with me—many of us in this fellowship are new to letting others get close, and we may feel anxious about it. Problems with relationships are often at the heart of problems of addiction. Whatever it is, I’m open to hearing about it, and I won’t criticize your feelings or walk away. I’ve been there myself. Thank you for being willing to talk with me about your needs and plans.

Today, I am willing to be honest and open with a trusted person.

**************************************************

~ THE EYE OPENER ~

Life is to a very great extent a matter of choice. It is true we do not choose our parents, our birthdays or the day on which we die but that is about all.

It therefore follows we are largely what we choose to be. We made a very radical change in our lives when we chose not to drink and what further gains we make I life will be, likewise, of our own choosing.

**************************************************

~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

COMES THE DAWN

After a while you learn the subtle difference between holding a hand and chaining a soul. And you learn that love doesn’t mean leaning and company doesn’t mean security. And you begin to learn that kisses aren’t contracts, and presents aren’t promises.

And you begin to accept your defeats with your head up and your eyes open, with the grace of a grown-up, not the grief of a child.

And you learn to build all your roads on today because tomorrow’s ground is too uncertain for plans, and futures have a way of falling down in mid-flight.

After a while you learn that even sunshine burns if you get too much. So you plant your own garden and decorate your own soul, instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers..

And you learn that you really can endure, that you really are strong, and you really do have worth.

And you learn and learn . . . With every goodbye, you learn.

*************************************************

~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

UNLOAD THAT CAMEL

Jesus said, It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle, than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God (Mark 10:25)

The smile used by Jesus was a graphic one for his listeners. In those days every important city was surrounded by a wall for defense. There would be a large gate in the wall and this would be closed at sunset and placed under an armed guard. There was usually, however, a low wicket gate known as the needle’s eye, set in the big door. When a laden camel arrived after sunset the only way it could get in was to be unloaded of all merchandise, whereupon it would squirm on its knees through the needle’s eye.

Unload your camel if you want to enter the Kingdom of Heaven. You do this, of course, not by getting rid of conditions in themselves, but by getting rid of your sense of dependency on them. Very often you will find yourself so glad to be without a lot of that merchandise that you will never put it back.

**************************************************

~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

All in the Attitude

Always give them the old fire, even when you feel like a squashed cake of ice.

~ Ethel Merman ~

You are a fantastic rider!” trail guide Frank called to eight-year- old Shanera, who felt awkward and looked self-conscious on her first horseback ride. “You look so beautiful on that horse,” he continued. “I can’t wait to get your picture!” The child lit up. Frank works magic with his riders, constantly bolstering their confidence, affirming their strengths, and lightening awkward moments. Fifteen years ago, he came to Maui with a dream of taking visitors on unique horseback treks through secret jungles and unspoiled mountains. With hard work and a dynamic attitude, his Adventures on Horseback? has attracted a steady stream of appreciative clients who ride to majestic cliffs and then picnic and swim at secluded waterfalls. He is living his dream and helping others to live theirs.

Much of Frank’s success is a result of the caring he brings to all his riders. A trail ride with Frank is not just a jaunt on a horse; it is a journey into self-esteem. While some customers are nervous riding through obscure jungle trails, Frank’s unwavering attention, full presence, and unconditional support have filled his guest log with superlative comments and increasing word-of-mouth business.

You can live your dreams, too—the more unique and outrageous, the better! Your best investment in making them a reality is an attitude of confidence, joy, and true caring. Make your career an exercise in giving love, and you will succeed beyond your secret hopes.

Help me remember that everything I do is an opportunity to share love.

My dreams are God’s dreams for me.