[bluidkiti]

October 15

Step by Step

Today, quiet the noise of my mind and stop the traffic of racing thoughts just for today. I will not mourn or lament losses that my drinking inflicted and instead will be grateful that the losses weren’t. I will not cling to regrets for amends that I can never make and instead believe that being sober is my strongest and sincerest apology. I will not shield myself behind that wall of self-imposed isolation and instead take a chance that I have something to offer to someone else and that they have something I can learn. I will not live in the problem of fighting not to drink and instead will live in the solution of living sober, and I will not expect more of myself and anyone else than can be reasonably expected. I will not judge anyone or anything lest their judgments condemn me, and I will not waste valuable time on taking anyone else’s moral inventory and focus on my own. Today, I will simply be and not resist the good that is yet to come. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

ATTITUDES

The great scorer . . . marks not that you won or lost, but how you played the game.

~ Grantland Rice ~

When we are told that "some are sicker than others," we are reminded that we might also say, "some of us are more well than others." Both statements are correct. We remember that "we are not bad people trying to become good, but are sick individuals trying to get well, physically, mentally, and spiritually."

All of us who remain abstinent, grow, and make positive changes in recovery are winners. But there is no competition with others in the Program. We all work together, as a team. Most of us do not consider those who relapse as losers. More aptly are they called "quitters." Each member "plays the game" by simple rules and to the best of an individual's ability.

There is no scoring, no giving of grades, and no graduation in the school of recovery. How I work the Program is up to me, and determines the quality of my recovery.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

The older I get, the more convinced I am that the space between communicating human being can be hallowed ground.

~ Fred Rogers ~

When two people sit down and talk, things change. Our true nature is basically revealed in our relationships with others. Starting from infancy, the protection we needed to survive came through our relationships with others. That’s how we were formed into human beings. We continue to need that connection in adult forms for our whole lives. To be human is to be in relationship. That’s where we learn to know ourselves. That’s where we grow and deepen and change. We truly become human by the impact of our communities, our families, our friendships, and our love relationships.

If we carefully weigh what we let others know about us, we remain isolated. In that state, we only recycle our single internal conclusions over and over again. But when we let others in and allow them to communicate with some of our best and our worst parts, we step onto a dynamic hallowed ground with rich opportunities for growth.

Today I will talk to someone about some of my personal thoughts and feeling.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

Strangely, it was comforting to me when I read that squirrels forget where they hide about half their nuts.

~ Ruth Casey ~

We sometimes set unreasonably high standards for ourselves. Instead of being content with average, we think we must be perfect or we don’t count. The problem is that none of us can be perfect in every endeavor. To be human is to be fallible. And that’s okay, even though we don’t often believe it.

God doesn’t expect perfection. How often have we been reminded of that since joining this program? What God does expect is that we do our best and do it lovingly. Whether we are at work, at home cooking dinner for the family, or at the bedside of an ailing friend or lover, we need only give the task our focused attention and willing heart. The joy we feel as the result of our efforts will convince us that we have been as close to perfect as we need to be.

I will do the best I can today if I am determined to be attentive to the task at hand and loving in my attitude.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I need to limit the stress in my life

It's not fun, but I'm slowly learning how I create problems for myself in recovery For instance, (a) I tend to make too many commitments; (b) I often try to do two things at once; and (c) I work too hard at my job. It seems I've managed to build a lot of stress into my life and left little time for myself and recovery.

Despite my time in recovery I still need to make some changes or else face a setback or relapse. Making further changes in my lifestyle will be hard and I'll need help. But to stay on track in recovery—my most important job—I'll do what I need to do.

I will do some reading on Step Eleven, review my priorities, and renew my daily recovery plan.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

A man...should keep his friendships in constant repair.

~ Samuel Johnson ~

Learning to enjoy the company of loving friends gives life meaning. Coming to value ourselves enough to select friends who give as well as take is a blessed experience. Knowing that we deserve love, we are able to relax and let those special people in our lives do lovely things for us.

There was a time when it didn’t feel good or comfortable to receive attention, praise, or presents. We thought we didn’t deserve it. We thought that to be loved we must give, not receive. The very thought of glowing in someone else’s attention and love was an uncomfortable idea, almost embarrassing.

But today, real friendship asks that we learn to receive as well as give; otherwise our friend is robbed of the pleasure of loving. The same is true of our spiritual growth. It is as important to love God as it is to let Him love us.

Today help me learn to receive as well as give.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

The Man, the Boy, and the Donkey

A man and his son headed to market with their donkey. A man on a horse passed them and asked, “Why aren’t you I riding your donkey?”

The man placed his son on the donkey, and they continued on their way. They passed by a family working in I their fields. A young girl said, “Look at that lazy boy riding while his father is walking.”

The man told his son to get off the donkey, and he climbed on. They passed a group of women and one said, “What a selfish man, making his son walk while he rides.” The man asked his son to climb up on the donkey with him. They passed a traveler on the road, who said, “That poor donkey is carrying too much weight.”

Not knowing what to do, the man and his son began to I carry the donkey. But the donkey kicked so violently they released their hold and the donkey ran away.

The moral of the story: In striving to please everyone, you end up pleasing no one.

Striving to be a people-pleaser can make you feel as if what you are doing is never right, and you lose your ability to make your own decisions.

I will choose to do what is right for me.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

In the midst of winter, I finally learned there was in me an invincible summer.

~ Albert Camus ~

When things seem to be going badly and everyone appears to be against us, what do we see? Do we think things will never get better, or is there a ray of hope inside us that believes everything will soon be okay?

In the midst of a long, cold winter, we might only see the gray skies, feel only the biting chill, hear only the crunch of our feet on the frozen earth. Wintertime can be compared to the bottom we first had to hit before we entered the program—a gray, dreary, hopeless, emotional freeze.

Yet we've learned there is hope. Each day of recovery has warmed the emotional chill and brought new life back into our bodies. We can now trust that even in the darkest and coldest of times, there is a warm glowing ray of hope and faith all around us.

I trust there is hope for even the most hopeless of situations. Tonight I have great faith in the healing of the program.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Being positive

For us to grow and develop spiritually, we need to examine our thoughts and beliefs. Do we look for the good in people, places, and events? Do we shed a positive light on all we come into contact with? To under-stand and accept is not to limit or control. Acknowledging the truth generates positive energy, positive thoughts, and a positive lifestyle.

Negative thinking produces negative ways. It undermines our morals so that we develop a “what’s the difference” attitude. But a positive faith in a Higher Power, as each of us understands it, gives strength to the body and courage to the soul.

Do I have positive beliefs?

Higher Power, may positive thoughts and beliefs be the guiding forces of my life.

I will cultivate positive beliefs today by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Nobody can give you wiser advice than yourself.

~ CICERO ~

Newcomer

Sometimes, when I check something out with you or with another person whose experience I trust, the answer I get isn't all that different from what I've already thought of on my own. I wonder if by asking for an opinion, I've simply created another kind of dependency.

Sponsor

The willingness to ask for help is what got us here in the first place—that willingness is a gift. Once we reached out, the healing process inside us began. We were open to the nourishment that our spirits needed for repair and growth; we were humble enough to accept it.

As we continue in recovery, small hints, rather than lengthy sermons, are sufficient to guide us. We've begun to trust our own gut feelings and to honor our intuitive wisdom. We may still appreciate the validation of those we respect. We may want help reasoning things out when we're confused or undecided about a course of action. There's nothing childish or dependent about that; staying open to learning from others is part of maturing and becoming more secure within ourselves.

Today, I listen for inner guidance. I trust my own wisdom.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

AA has no formal textbooks—we learn by absorbing the experiences and the wisdom of those who have successfully found an answer here. The rate of our progress in AA is to a large extent dependent upon the ability to listen and to digest what we hear.

We may not be conscious of acquiring any degree of wisdom at the end of any one meeting, but when we look back over a period of a month or so, we see that the things that entered our ears have taken root in our hearts.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Today I Will Trust

Today, I will stop straining to know
What I don't know,
To see what I can't see,
To understand what I don't yet understand.
I will trust that being is sufficient,
And let go of my need to figure things out.

~ From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie, page 205 ~

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

IS IT SELFISH?

Is it selfish to pray for yourself? Some people think that it is, and say that you should pray only for others, but this, of course, is a foolish idea.

You must pray for yourself constantly. How could it be otherwise? We worship God by believing in Him, trusting Him, and loving Him wholeheartedly—and we can attain to that only through prayer. The sole object of our being here is that we may grow like him—and we can do that only through prayer.

The more we pray for ourselves the more power will our prayers have for any other purpose whatever; so praying for ourselves is the reverse of selfishness—it is truly glorifying God.

Bow down thine ear, O Lord, hear me: for I am poor and needy. . . . Rejoice the soul of thy servant; for unto thee, O Lord, do I lift up my soul (Psalm 86:1, 4).

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Not Funny Anymore

If you believe, it means you’ve got imagination…you don’t face facts. If you believe, then you hang on—what can stop you? If I don't make it today, I'll come in tomorrow.

~ Ruth Gordon ~

In 1995, two underdog baseball teams made it to the American Leaque Championship Series. For the first time in 40 years, the Cleveland Indians registered a league-leading season, pitted against the long-suffering Seattle Mariners. During the series, the television announcers showed an old clip from the TV sitcom Family Ties, in which Michael J. Fox's character announced to a group of friends that he had two tickets to a baseball game. "Who's playing?" asked one of his buddies.

"Cleveland and Seattle."

Instantly, his friends rolled with boisterous laughter and told him, "We don't think so."

The video clip represented a world of contrast against the respect these two teams had earned and the excitement the series generated. In 1995, tickets were no laughing matter; they were at a premium.

What once seemed to be a joke can eventually emerge triumphant. Most great ideas and inventions were laughed at before they were appreciated. Just because someone laughs at your idea or rejects it does not mean it is a bad idea. lt may just mean that your audience has limited vision.

Hold the faith in your vision. lf you believe it is good and you receive internal signals that you should continue, refuse to be put off by the opinions of the world. Do it not for others, but for yourself. Someday the tickets will be at a Premium.

Guide me to the highest service and give me the faith to pursue my visions with diligence.

I believe in what I am and what I do. I value truth over opinion.