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September 2

Step by Step

Today, simplify the program as it relates to my recovery to three basic concepts: choice, consequences, and responsibility. If I take the infamous first drink or use, after all the excuses or justifications I can think of and all the blame I can put on other people or circumstances, drinking or using is my choice. And with that choice comes consequences, and with the consequences comes personal responsibility. Ultimately, I am the only one who will be responsible to the consequences of my choice, and the consequences of my drinking became simply too high for me to want to face the responsibility of my choice to drink or use again. And we must honestly remember the consequences of our choice to use or drink - separation from or loss of family and-or friends, loss of a job or the threat of it, standing before a judge after spending the night in the county jail's drunk tank after being nailed for another DUI or for physically hurting someone else like a passing motorist or whoever we picked a fight with. Today, I can pray that the high cost of the consequences of choosing to drink and now not wanting to be responsible to those consequences will keep me clean and sober another 24 Hours. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

UNDERSTANDING

I shall light a candle of understanding in thine heart which shall not be put out.

~ Apocrypha ~

When we found an understanding of the disease that made us captives to addiction, we came to a realization of both our problem and the solution. But we needed to fully understand. There could be no guess work. If some experienced relapses, we could acknowledge the fact that their understanding was not complete. As spiritual progress continues, we become more and more certain that there is no room in our Program for half-measures and old ideas.

Understanding helps us cope with both the problems we face and our success in dealing with them. We will neither have doubts about the fact that our Program works if we work it, nor will we be stubbornly insistent that we have all the answers.

In my Second Step, when I came to believe that a Power greater than myself could restore me to sanity, I began to understand my problems and what I must do to find solutions.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

It is with our passions as with fire and water: they make good servants but bad masters.

~ Aesop ~

Our passions—whether they be sex, anger, love, or an intense interest in a hobby—are energizing and enriching dimensions of our lives. On the other hand, who hasn’t made mistakes with his passions? Who hasn’t had regrets about his actions when a drive became a master rather than a servant? Some of us are recovering from problems with anger or sex. Many of us are subject, in our recovery, to over involvement with some new passion, such as work or a hobby, that once again takes us away from our relationships and our peace of mind.

A man grows up by making mistakes and learning from them. We learn to steer a car by turning the wheel, overcorrecting, and recorrecting. It is when we refuse to acknowledge that our passion has become our master that we cannot make the needed adjustments to keep our passions in balance. Keeping an honest, unflinching personal inventory is what a strong man does.

Today I am grateful for the passions that serve my well-being.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

Whether one has a natural talent or not, any learning period requires the willingness to suffer uncertainty and embarrassment.

~ Gail Sheehy ~

We are all multitalented, but if we grew up in dysfunctional families, we may have failed to understand this. Households encumbered by tension, conflict over values or expectations, and confusion about roles of family members kept nurturing to a minimum. We grew up shortchanged. Fortunately, it is never too late to develop the talents that lie within us.

This recovery program will nurture our talents; the friends we make here will help us understand our worth. As we attempt the “new,” we’ll be helped along by the support of our Higher Power who promises to love, guide, and care for us.

I have the talent to do whatever I need to today if I let God and my friends help me.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I am learning not to reject myself for mistakes

I had a slip in my recovery from addiction. I felt sorry and ashamed. I felt like a failure—unworthy of help, unworthy of recovery.

Fortunately, I remembered to get a hold of my sponsor. I told her what I'd done and how I felt about myself. She listened to me calmly, carefully. When she spoke, she offered support without judging. Soon I felt lighter, no longer so alone: I felt accepted. It only took one other person to let me know that, even though I'd had a slip, I was still OK. I was not rejected—even though I'd rejected myself. Perhaps now I can begin to forgive myself.

I will talk about my mistakes, and forgiving myself, with my group.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

The day I made my self-care a priority was the day I also opened myself up to more truly loving others.

~ Naomi Roscoe ~

Overcommitment is a juggling act in which we try to keep several balls in the air at once. We juggle our job, family, and self-care responsibilities at a furious speed until we tire or feel overwhelmed. When we feel overwhelmed, the first ball we usually drop is self-care, promising ourselves we will pick it up again “when we have time.”

But we can easily change the pace and speed of our act instead of neglecting our personal needs. Nothing feels better than being well rested, and physically and emotionally fit. When we remember how it feels to be in great condition, we wonder why we ever stopped taking good care of ourselves.

We can begin today to get our priorities straight again and put our own needs at the top of our daily list. If we love ourselves enough to make self- care a top priority, everything else will fall into place.

Today let me remember that I can give to others in direct proportion to my ability to nurture my own needs.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

No one can look back cm his schooldays and say with truth that they were altogether unhappy.

~ George Orwell ~

When you were a child, you may have been filled with anticipation at the start of a new school year. Perhaps you shopped for new clothes and school supplies. Perhaps, in advancing to a new grade, you had greater opportunities for sports or clubs.

As an adult, you can view this time of year as a period in your recovery in which you return to a fresh start in the “school of sobriety.” You can think of your meetings as classroom sessions and listen with greater attention to the discussion. You can resolve to gain deeper understanding about your addiction. You can review the Twelve Steps to determine what you have left undone and make up your mind to no longer put off Step work you have avoided. You can reread the Big Book and strive to gain greater knowledge.

When you think of September as an opportunity for opening yourself up to new discoveries, you can become more deeply involved in all aspects of your recovery: in your mind, your body, and your spirit. What you choose to do can help you to continue on your new path in life— one in which you are clean and sober.

I dedicate this month to renewing and strengthening my commitment to recovery.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

And this is my way o' looking at it: there's the sperrit o' God in all things and all times—weekday as well as Sunday—and i' the great works and inventions, and i' the figuring and the mechanics. And God helps us with our headpieces and our hands as well as with our souls. . . .

~ George Eliot ~

The concept of a Higher Power may have been difficult for us to understand as children. But many of us still question the existence of anything beyond us that will help us get well.

A Higher Power's existence can be evidenced in many nonreligious ways. The creative gifts given to an artist, people who smile at us and call us friends—these are evidence of a Higher Power.

The Higher Power of the program is an overriding feeling of peace and serenity. We can rake in that feeling when we detach, when we say the Serenity prayer, when we ask for help, even when we breathe deeply and relax. There is a greater Power for all of us who want to believe, whenever we're ready.

I believe I can find peace and serenity in my life. Tonight I can ask for help to find it.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Practicing spiritual principles

Just exactly what can we do to put our spiritual principles into practice? Here are some ideas.

We can say love when others say hate. We can say people when others say money. We can speak up when others are silent. We can carry on when others give up. We can offer help when others withdraw. We can follow the program while others search for a softer way.

How active is my spiritual life?

Higher Power, help me find the courage to practice my spiritual principles.

The spiritual principle I will practice today is

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Action is eloquence.

~ WILLIAM SHAKESPEATTE ~

Newcomer

I think I'm willing to make amends, but what if the person I'm making amends to doesn't let me? I have family and friends who are uncomfortable if I talk about feelings or about anything having to do with the past.

Sponsor

Some people in our lives may not be quick to believe that we've gone through significant changes. If they’re not ready to rely on us, to trust that things will be different, it may be less painful for them not to hear us speak of how we’ve harmed them in the past. Accepting that we caused harm in the past as a result of our addictions may trigger feelings of guilt about their role in their relationship with us, and it may require that they look at the role of addiction in their own lives. It may be painful for people to remember how they've been hurt by you or me. Or, as you're suggesting, they may simply be people who are uncomfortable talking about or listening to feelings.

Making amends isn't just saying we’re sorry. What “making amends" really means is changing. We can amend relationships with other people by taking sober actions, by not repeating the kind of behavior that caused harm in the past. In time, they may be able to see that we are dependable and consistent, and that our role in relationships has changed for the better.

Our sense of completion with Step Nine doesn't depend on the way others respond. The change is within us.

Today, my self-esteem comes from doing things differently.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

The secret of cutting any tree down, regardless of size, is to hew it one chip at a time.

Men are not put in a position to do great things until they have established the reputation for doing many small things well.

If you have the great ambition to bring happiness to a whole world, a good starting point is within your own undershirt.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Blaming the Past

O Lord, help me stop blaming the factors that I think contributed to my addiction: parents, relatives, friends, the church, and most important, myself. Help me realize that understanding may be helpful, but blaming is always counterproductive. The Program teaches that the reasons are not that important. My progress and growth in recovery are based on the spiritual. God, help mc focus on how Your Spirit, in me and through me, guides me away from blaming the past.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

AN OUNCE OF PREVENTION

The old adage, "An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure," is just as true in the spiritual life as it is in the material world. A great many people wait to make their contact with God until a serious difficulty is upon them and then they hasten to find a spiritual solution. Of course, it is better to seek God under such circumstances than never to find Him at all. But why wait for trouble? Many a difficulty could be prevented or lightened if we were to make our contact with God now.

The Bible says now is the day of salvation. Now is the accepted time.

If you will put your life in God's hands now through daily prayer and meditation and complete willingness to do His will, you will find that your problems will grow less as time goes on, and you will have acquired that serenity and poise that only God can give. Then, come what may, nothing shall disturb you.

And now, Lord, what wait I for? My hope is in thee (Psalm 39:7).

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

True Offering

What the Holy Spirit does with gifts you give each other, to whom He offers them and where and when is up to Him.

~ A Course in Miracles ~

In Bali I attended a service at a stately ancient temple on a high cliff overlooking the ocean. During the service, a large basket of fresh fruit was placed on the altar as an offering to the gods. After the ceremony, a group of monkeys emerged from the adjacent forest, made a beeline for the altar, ravaged the fruit, and cast banana peels on the floor. As I observed this destruction, I felt somehow violated. I found an old temple-keeper and pointed out to him, "The monkeys are eating the offering to the gods!"

He smiled and calmly answered, "Yes, they do that every day," and went on with his sweeping. Then I understood the whole point of an offering: lf the people made an offering to the gods, and the gods decided to give it to the monkeys, who was I to try and boss the gods? The chances were slim that the bodiless gods would just strike the altar with lightning and consume the fruit by vaporizing it into thin air. No, physical meals end up in physical bodies; even if the monkeys did not get to the fruit first, it would be eaten by bugs or some other critters. Why not feed God's creatures?

True offering requires that we release the gift after we offer it; otherwise we're tainting the gift with our need to control its destiny. Then it is not a gift at all; it is a guilt bargain.

Communication is an offering. When you tell someone your truth, you must release your expectation of what the other person should do with it. They may thank you profusely, love you forever, argue with you, or ignore you. It doesn't matter. Of course we hope the gift will be received with appreciation and thanks. But if it isn't, we must not dictate. We've done our part, and we must trust the universe to do the rest.

I offer my truth without attachment to results. I offer all my gifts to You, trusting You to use them in the highest way possible.

I give and let go. I trust God to use my gifts wisely.