[bluidkiti]

September 4

Step by Step

Today, remember gratitude and its importance in recovery. I can be grateful that the AA lifeline was tossed to me when I needed it, grateful for the peers in the program who stood with me and picked me up when I stumbled and fell, grateful that the 12 Steps have kept me clean and sober the last 24 Hours and, maybe most importantly, grateful that whatever problems I have even in sobriety are nowhere near as bad as they were in my drinking days. In feeling with sincerity a gratitude that my life in sobriety is far better than it was in my drinking, I can hope to develop the humility that is required to make progress in my sobriety - humility being my total surrender to my higher power and seeking His will for my life, not mine. Today, I measure my gratitude with the goal to bolster it for the sake of progress. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

UNITY

All your strength is in your union. All your danger is in discord.

~ Longfellow ~

History is full of examples of how important unity in purpose and execution is in any act. Joining forces can create the triumph of good and the defeat of evil. "United we stand, divided we fall" has been a battle cry voiced by men and women from all nations and levels of society when they unite for a common cause.

Those in the Program know from the very beginning of their recovery that building control over their addiction can never happen without the aid of others who have the same problems.

Early in our program of growth, we were told about our First Tradition, that common welfare always comes first. Unless we recognize the fact that we need the help of other members, and are willing to go to any lengths to achieve success, we are headed for failure.

"One for all and all for one" applies to my recovery. I can't do it alone.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

If people concentrated on the really important things in life, there’d be a shortage of fishing poles.

~ Doug Larson ~

We win admiration for work, achievement, and competitiveness. We are told that a good man is a good provider. These are external rewards, but the rewards of relaxing, of rest and quiet solitude, of recreation are not external. We feel those rewards internally. They are the rewards of personal growth. Work addiction is a tempting mistake for us recovering men. We had big problems in the past and it feels wonderful to know that we can be competent in our work. We lived in crisis and our lives were out of control; that memory can haunt us for a lifetime, so work may now provide a welcome structure. But too much work can be another distraction from the important things.

Sometimes we may need to schedule some free time with our families and with our friends, time simply for loafing. Taking a half hour each day for quiet thought and reflection, with no external sign of accomplishment, helps us to become better men.

Today I will lighten my focus on work and make time for play.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

There is a purpose for our existence which, at times, transcends human understanding.

~ Aphrodite Matsakis ~

In the midst of our pain-filled past, few of us believed there was purpose to our lives. Most moments were frantically lived and accompanied by burning dread. How long has it been since we felt that way? What a changed perspective we have cultivated now that we are clean and sober!

We may not feel entirely safe every minute of every day. Old habits are not easily replaced. But we are coming to believe that it is no accident that we are in this program. The more we hear that our lives have purpose, the more comfortable we are with this understanding. As we progress through the Steps, it becomes easier to see the contribution past experiences made to current circumstances. Every piece has played its part, and we continue to evolve.

I am fulfilling a greater purpose given to me by God. I may not understand my role today, but it will become clear in time.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I want to live

I am slowly changing my life. I no longer use street drugs. I have given up my using friends. I have let go of my chemical defense against my emotional illness. I admit my serious problem, a dual disorder.

These days I wake up feeling clearheaded. I am learning about my illnesses and coming to accept them. My new recovering friends care about me more than my old using ones. More and more I am facing the world and taking care of myself the best I can. I have developed some strength and courage. I truly want to live.

Today I will feel my strength and take a healthy risk.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

We have to learn
not only why we are in the world,
but also what the timing of things is.
Thy time, not my time.

~ Elisabeth Kubler-Ross ~

When we look at the patterns in our lives, it seems that doors open and events happen at exactly the right time. Even when we don’t think so, even when it seems that the worst thing happens at the worst possible moment, God’s plan is operating perfectly. Letting the current of life carry us along works better than swimming upstream. When the time for change is near, the forces of nature seem to be cooperative and we find ourselves at the right place.

It is frustrating to feel ready for change but stuck in a seemingly unchanging situation. God often seems to be watching a different clock that doesn’t chime and doesn’t bring us what we think we want, when we want it. Trust, patience, and a wider vision can be our best friends as we wait for the right door to open. Trusting that God knows what’s best for us will help us focus on the daily miracles we find along the road to change and renewal.

Today let me realize that I am exactly where I’m supposed to be at this moment.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

He was paralyzed with the impossibility of either belief or disbelief.

~ L. M. Boston ~

A spiritual leader had embarked on a mission to spread the word of God. One of his followers served as a scout, ensuring the roads ahead were clear. One day the scout returned with bad news: torrential downpours had caused a small stream to swell beyond its banks and they could not advance. The leader instructed them to make camp. The next morning, the leader asked the scout to check on the stream.

“But we could not cross it yesterday,” the scout answered. “Please check,” said the leader. So the scout went ahead and checked. He returned with the same news.

Each morning for a week, the leader asked the doubting scout to check on the stream. Once more the scout was sent to check, and this time he returned with good news: they could cross the stream. “There is a lesson to be learned in this,” the leader said. “One doubt should not breed eternal doubt. God ensures that what was yesterday is not the same as today. And so it is with faith. To believe, you must replace doubt with faith. Each day you must awaken with faith because one day your faith will be rewarded.”

I will be steadfast in my faith so I can overcome my doubts and fears.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

Loneliness is a bitter thing . . . more bitter when you think you have been freed from it and find it returning again.

~ Anne Cameron ~

It is a rare person indeed who never feels lonely. Even when we are surrounded by co-workers, friends, or family, we can still feel lonely. Now that we have the program and our Higher Power, why shouldn't we have feelings of loneliness? "What's wrong with me?" we may cry, thinking we are doing something to cause these feelings.

But feelings of loneliness can reveal our need to get out more, to be with people. We may be so withdrawn into ourselves that we cannot see or hear others around us. Yet they are there. They have been there all day today, and they will continue to be there for us.

If we listen to ourselves, we will be able to hear our needs crying out for attention. If we pay attention to our lonely feelings, we can open ourselves up to the "cures"—a phone call, a walk with a friend, a meeting, or a few hugs!

Help me listen to my loneliness. I can then open myself up to others.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Coping with fear

After getting clean and sober, we may suddenly become very fearful. Situations that never bothered us in our using days loom up at us. Some of us feel terror when riding with a careless driver. Some of us feel pan-icky at the thought of a burglar. Some of us fear losing our jobs for no good reason.

As we regain our sanity, we may feel our lives become extraordinarily valuable. This is good, but it will help if we can practice trusting in our Higher Power and the fellowship.

In time, our fears will diminish.

Am I learning to handle fear?

Higher Power, help me to believe that my process is normal and that I am not alone.

I will deal with my fear today by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

Prayer needs no speech.

~ MOHANDAS GANDHI ~

Newcomer

How can I make amends to someone who has died?

Sponsor

Relationships are healed in the heart. Loving communication need not be limited by time or space. It's useful to remember that our purpose in taking Step Nine is to amend ourselves and our behavior toward others, to end the cycle of guilt and isolation that will lead us back to active addiction.

There are many ways of making amends to someone who has passed away. Those that I've personally experienced as beneficial and deeply healing include the following: (1) We can write a letter of amends and share it with a sponsor, spiritual adviser, or trusted friend in recovery. (2) We can speak to the person in our hearts, praying both before and after for a complete, healing communication. (3) We can use our imagination to create a simple ritual for an amends "visit." For example, to make amends to my mother, I prepared to spend an evening with her, cooked and ate food she used to enjoy, lit candles, and listened to a tape I was fortunate enough to have of her voice. Then I spoke aloud to her as if she were present, and made amends. I listened, in meditation, for a loving response. The power of this experience was far greater than I'd expected.

When we make amends, whether or not the person to whom we're making them is physically present, we must be willing to forgive ourselves for what we wish we'd done differently.

Today, I let go of all obstacles to making amends.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

Too many of us ex-drunks expect too much when we get dried out. We, with characteristic impatience, see no reason why we can't, overnight, regain all our lost ground and get the fifteen thousand dollar job that other sober men get.

Drying-out only gives us the opportunity to realize our ambitions. Ability always has been, and always will be, a factor to be reckoned with. Getting sober won’t make a musician out of a boilermaker.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

For a Sane and Sound Sex Life

Dear God, I pray for a sane and sound ideal for my sex life. I will subject each relation to this test—Is it selfish or not? I ask You to mold my ideals and help me live up to them. I will remember always that my sex powers are God-given and therefore good, neither to be used lightly or selfishly, nor to be despised and loathed. I must be willing to grow toward this ideal.

I will treat sex as any other problem, and ask You what I should do in each specific situation.

The right answer will come, if I want it. I earnestly pray for the right ideal, for guidance in each questionable situation, for sanity, and for strength to do the right thing.

~ Adapted from material in Alcoholics Anonymous, Fourth Edition, pages 69-70 ~

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

NOT DEAD, BUT SLEEPETH

Most hotel rooms are furnished with a notice that says "do not disturb." The guest has only to hang this outside the door and he can sleep in peace as long as he wishes. Some people appear to have hung such a notice on their brains; they deeply resent anything like a new idea, or even a new and better way of considering familiar things. They are slumbering away their lives in a kind of semi-coma; repeating mechanically the time-worn phrases and threadbare ideas of the past. Not dead, but sleepeth, might very well be said of them, and, indeed, their consciousness is a mental cemetery.

If you have been sleeping like this, pull yourself together, rub the mental sleep from your eyes. Now is the day of salvation. Start right in today to handle at least one important part of your life in a new way. Break at least one rusty fetter today, and once this process begins you will be astonished to find how far you will go, and what wonderful things you will attain to.

Awake thou that sleepest, and arise from the dead, and Christ shall give thee light (Ephesians 5:14).

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

How Big Is Your Wheelbarrow?

Your reasoning is excellent; it’s just that your premise is all wrong.

~ Ashleigh Brilliant ~

When a laborer in a hardware factory asked the company president for a promotion, the CEO gruffly told him that he didn't have enough business savvy to be a manager. The laborer answered, "I'll bet you I can make it appear as if I'm bringing the company business, but I'll be robbing the organization blind without you knowing how. If I can pull this off, will you give me a promotion?" The president, a sportsman at heart, could not resist such a challenge.

The next day at 5:00 P.M., the laborer showed up at the cash register of the factory store with a wheelbarrow full of items for purchase, One by one, the checkout clerk rang up each article, which the laborer paid for and took home. The next day he did the same, and the next, and the next. The president, watchful for the laborer's deception, gave strict orders to be sure that every item in the wheelbarrow was paid for, and that the laborer was searched for concealed articles. After a few weeks, the company showed a loss in profits, and by the end of the quarter, it was in the red. Finally the president called the laborer into his office and conceded the bet. "Now you must tell me how you've gotten away with your plot under such scrutiny. What have you been stealing?"

A sneaky grin grew on the laborer's face as he answered, "Wheelbarrows."

You can work profusely to make cosmetic changes in your life, but unless you address the foundation of your belief system, no real change will occur. Our consciousness is the wheelbarrow that carries all of our activities, and if our container is faulty, everything in it is liable to leak. Do you believe in a universe of abundance, love, and support, or do you think in terms of lack, loss, and separation? It will do you no good to make a change in the outer world unless you first change your consciousness. Change your mind about the nature of life, and accept the presence of God in it, and everything else will change automatically.

Be in my thoughts today. With You at my center, all must go well.

I build my world on the reality of Spirit.