[bluidkiti]

April 21

Wisdom for Today
Probably one of the biggest changes I have experienced in recovery has been achieving serenity and peace of mind. I do not have this all the time, but more often than not I can go through my day and not live in a state of constant anxiety. When I was actively drinking and using, some of the anxiety I felt was physical. I would wake up in the morning and feel sick. My body felt like a truck had hit it. My body ached, and I was agitated, shaky and nervous. But that was a small part of what was going on inside of me. It was much more the mental anguish.

I lived in a state of fear. I suffered in quiet desperation. I always felt different, and I was lonely and isolated from everyone, even myself. I didn’t know myself anymore. I lived with a growing sense of inferiority, guilt and shame. There was no inner peace. I had no serenity. The program and working the steps changed all of that. I am not really sure when I first began to gain the sense of inner calmness; but as my behavior, beliefs and thinking all began to change through my being clean and sober, something changed on the inside. I began to know peace, and I began to know serenity. Am I changing on the inside? Do I know more peace of mind in recovery?
Meditations for the Heart
As an addict and alcoholic I know I need to look for guidance from my Higher Power. But one place more than any other has this been true – my daily interaction with other people. I have learned just how easy it is for me to get off track with my thinking, my emotions and my self-image if I don’t turn to my Higher Power and ask for direction in my interactions with other people. God can and will lead me if I turn to Him. He will care for me in all my relationships with other people. He will keep me from temptation and failure if I follow where He leads. He will protect me in all my interpersonal interactions with others. I am led to places where I can grow in my relationships with others. I am shown how to develop trust and rebuild my interpersonal life with others. I find ways to live properly and treat others as I would want to be treated. My loneliness disappears. Am I finding that my Higher Power teaches me to have healthy relationships?
Petitions to my Higher Power
God,

I am grateful for the sense of inner peace You have given me. The inner serenity I experience, even in the middle of life’s storms, is a gift from You. Thank You for showing me the way to get to this place in my life. Help me to continue to grow in my relationships with others. Lead me, teach me and show me what I need to do in this day.

Amen.