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April 20

Step by Step

Today, small steps instead of an “easier, softer way” – giant leaps toward the goal of recovery. Alcoholism and its companion physical, emotional and spiritual diseases developed over time, and their solution is likely to take as much if not more time. But impatience is a characteristic of most alcoholics, and it cannot be allowed to tempt us to take the short route through the steps toward sobriety. Failing to give full and complete attention to each step may set us up for frustration and disappointment – and together they put us at risk for a slip or relapse. Today, wisdom of patience in taking the steps one by one and understanding that it is through working them that we earn what we pursue. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

SINCERITY

The more we love our friends, the less we flatter them; it is by excusing nothing that pure love shows itself.

~ Moliere ~

The concern we display for those new to our Program must always be sincere and honest. When beginners ask for advice, our answer mustn’t be phony, but we also need to soften the blow by “truth with love.” We can do this by promising them that life will get better if they really want spiritual growth and if they are freely willing to change their attitudes.

If we “con” anyone with false promises because we don’t want to hurt their feelings, they will become our enemy when they find out the truth. This will surely happen when their recovery becomes secure.

If someone in the Fellowship makes me angry by telling a truth that brings me progress, let me be sincere enough to tell them I am grateful.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

My dear child, you must believe in God in spite of what the clergy tell you.

~ Benjamin Jowett ~

We come to the Twelve Step program of recovery from many different backgrounds. Some of us already have a very solid spiritual base to call upon. Some of us have a blank, undeveloped sense of spirituality and an open mind. Some of us had negative or even abusive experiences with organized religion, so we turned away from all ideas of spirituality. Now we are following a path that asks us to turn our lives and will over to God, and our past experience may tell us to say no to such a proposition.

Still, we want to recover, and our previous methods didn’t work, so now we are willing to have an open mind about “the God thing.” Maybe we can learn something we never understood before. The concept of God was controversial even among the men who first developed this path. They all knew that spiritual reliance was crucial to recovery, but they didn’t all believe in God in the same way. So they landed on the phrase, “God as we understood Him.” Wisely, they made the program’s spirituality a very big tent, and there is room for every individual’s beliefs.

Today I am grateful for the spirituality that this program has nurtured within me.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

Now that I don’t have to drink anymore, I’m glad I’m an alcoholic.

~ Anne A. ~

Remember how we felt when we first heard someone say at a meeting that she was grateful to be an alcoholic or drug addict? We were astonished. We weren’t grateful! How much our attitudes have changed. Now we, too, acknowledge the grace that has accompanied our addiction to chemicals. And most days we are grateful.

We couldn’t have imagined the lives we are now leading. Without a doubt we craved more joy and security, fewer conflicts, a sense of belonging. But we never imagined that giving up mood-altering chemicals was the solution. We thought they gave us the only happiness we deserved.

Now we are experiencing real happiness because of our sobriety. We are willing to let a Higher Power help us, and we are sincere in our efforts to change negative behaviors and attitudes. Everything we need is now ours.

Happiness is mine today. It’s as close as the expression of my gratitude.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I want to have faith

At my Step meeting, I hear the word faith. I hear that it’s important to my recovery. It’s a small word, but I don’t think I understand it. And I don’t think I have much of it.

And yet, as a child, I remember my uncle would hold my hands and wrists tight and swing me around and around and around. It scared me, but I loved it. I giggled. I got dizzy. I squealed in delight. Then, smiling, he would slow the spinning and slowly let me down. I trusted him and he never dropped me. Is that what faith is about?

I will ask two of my friends at group to talk with me about who they trust and what they believe in.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

In a consumer society, there are inevitably two kinds of slaves: the prisoners of addiction and the prisoners of envy.

~ Ivan Illich ~

Envy comes from a belief that others have more, or are worth more, than us. Coming to believe we are lovable lets us trust the healing of our addictions. This process challenges us to take off our masks and get to know our real selves. When we finally have the courage to confront our internal secrets, obsessions, and fears, we are set free. The deep, empty hole in us that cried out for soothing begins to heal, and we feel settled.

The task of accepting our human weaknesses and limitations and loving ourselves in spite of our imperfections is a difficult one, but is the path of spiritual growth.

Being willing to nourish the healthy seed inside us is one of the first steps that is necessary for the door of recovery to swing open. As we let go of our pain, self-doubt begins to diminish and our real selves begin to flourish.

Today let me trust that there is something lovable and healthy inside me that is waiting to flourish.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

Peace is when time doesn’t matter as it passes by.

~ Maria Schell ~

Prayer and meditation are used together so often that you may think they are essentially the same thing. But prayer is more of a direct outreach and communication with a divine being, while meditation encourages you to “go within” to create stillness and serenity.

There is no right or wrong way to meditate. Those who exercise—especially long distance runners—often think of their workout as a form of meditation. Others make a ritual out of their meditation by setting aside the same time each day, listening to soothing music, or chanting. Some use deep breathing techniques or yoga poses. Others listen to guided meditation tapes or meditate regularly with others.

But no matter what form your meditation takes, the purpose is to allow time for relaxation and for letting go so you can let your thoughts and emotions run free. You feel and observe what is within you and, in so doing, learn more about your innermost thoughts and feelings. When you do, you can better understand your fears, doubts, insecurities, regrets, and resentments. With this understanding, you can use the tools of the program to decrease the hold these emotions have upon you.

Meditation gives me the chance to learn more about myself. Today I will still my mind to open my mind.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

I know that I am here in a world where nothing is permanent but change. . . . I can change the form of things and influence a few people and that I am influenced by these and other people.

~ Elbert Hubbard ~

We are related to every person we see in a day, from the bus driver to the family member, from the store clerk to the boss, from strangers on the sidewalk to our dear friends. We are constantly changing, in constant motion with the people, places, and things around us. We are connected like links in a chain. Each link supports and gets support from those around it.

This connectedness is especially evident at meetings when we hear others tell our stories or relate to our feelings. Yet this same connectedness can be felt outside of a meeting with both program and nonprogram people. If there are addicted people in our lives, we can feel a connection with them because o[ their disease. We can understand them better and see ourselves more clearly through their defects. We are part of a strong chain made even stronger because of our differences.

There are those who know how we feel and can relate to us. I can learn to feel a part of everything.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Being willing

People often ask, “How does the program work?” The HOW of this program is Honesty, Open-mindedness, and Willingness. Often we must pray for willingness; sometimes we even have to pray to be willing to be willing!

We have very stubborn wills. If surrendered daily, however, they can accomplish much good for ourselves and others. Surely those who say “I will, I will” and don’t are not as close to the heart of God as those who say “I will not,” but do!

Am I really willing?

God, help me realize that to do your will for me today, in however small a way, I must let go of my own will.

I will practice willingness today by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

If you do not tell the truth about yourself you cannot tell it about other people.

~ VIRGINIA WOOLF ~

Newcomer

Why should I have to take the blame for everything? What about the things other people have done to me?

Sponsor

Taking Step Four isn’t about blaming ourselves or others. It can help us with our anger at those we believe have harmed us. When we write a Fourth Step, we name all the people and institutions we fear and resent. By putting into writing the wrongs we believe each of them has committed, we see the array of fears and resentments that burden our minds and disturb our serenity.

It’s human nature to fear or resent people we haven’t treated well. If I neglect someone—he to her, cheat her, or take something away from her that I know deep down is rightfully hers—I don’t very much want to see or think about her. I tell myself, “It’s all her fault.” Guilt feels unpleasant; I may turn to my addiction to keep it at bay. Step Four asks me to take an honest look at the ways I myself contributed to or even caused the situation I’m so upset about.

But there may also be certain things we didn’t cause. What if we’re convinced that we’re right? Instead of plotting revenge, we can understand that there are others who are mentally or spiritually ill. We can acknowledge what they have done, without having to cling to resentment. We can ask in our prayers that they be healed.

Today, I let faith replace my fears and resentments.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

Your Area Headquarters can probably use some additional help on the desk or perhaps a receptionist to interview new people calling at the club for help. They probably have a pressing need for Twelve Steppers or people who have a car and are available a day a week. Maybe they could use some speakers or even chair setter-uppers.

How about your Group? It takes people to distribute and collect ash trays. It’s possible you might come in handy preparing or distributing refreshments.

Whatever your talents are it is a safe bet they can use you. Then the Group will become Your Group. Don’t wait to be drafted – Volunteer.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) Here is a thought that kills a lot of chemical dependents: That may be true for you, but I’m different.

2) If you are looking for the perfect group before you join a home group, you are going to be homeless.

3) NA: We are not reformed junkies-but informed addicts.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Just For Today

Just for today I will try to live through this day only, and not tackle my whole life problem at once. I can do something for twelve hours that would appal me if I felt that I had to keep it up for a lifetime.

Just for today I will be happy. This assumes to be true what Abraham Lincoln sait, that “Most folks are as happy as they make their minds to be.”

Just for today I will try to strengthen my mind. I will study; I will learn something useful; I will not be a mental loafer; I will read something that requires effort, thought, and concentration.

Just for today I will exercise my soul in three ways: I will do somebody a good turn, and not get found out; if anybody knows of it, it will not count. I will do at least two things I don’t want to do—just for exercise. I will not show anyone that my feelings are hurt; they may be hurt, but today I will not show it.

Just for today I will be agreeable. I will look as good as I can, dress becomingly, talk low, act courteously, criticize not one bit, not find fault with anything, and not try to improve or regulate anybody except myself.

Just for today I will have a program. I may not follow it exactly, but I will have it. I will save myself from two pests: hurry and indecision.

Just for today I will have a quiet half hour all by myself, and relax. During this half hour, sometime, I will try to get a better perspective on my life.

Just for today I will be unafraid. I will enjoy that which is beautiful, and will believe that as I give to the world, so the world will give to me.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

CITY OF LIGHT

And I, if I be lifted up from the earth, will draw all men unto me (John 12:32)

Never try to force other people to accept spiritual truth. Instead, see to it that they are so favourably impressed by your own life and conduct, and by the peace and joy that radiate from you, that they will come running to you of their own accord, begging you to give them the wonderful thing that you have. To do this is to make your soul truly the city upon a hill that cannot be hidden because it is the City of God. This is to let your light shine to the glorifying of your Father which is in Heaven.

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Don’t Hiss It

What is essential is invisible to the eye; only with the heart can one see rightly.

~ from The Little Prince, by Saint-Exupery ~

As he stood before a firing squad, French dissident le Bodoyere gently touched his hand to his heart and advised the soldiers, “This is what you must not miss.”

We would do well to remember le Bodoyere’s advice throughout our entire lives. We may have all manner of material success, but unless our heart is fulfilled, we have nothing.

When someone died in ancient Egypt, the priests removed the bodily organs they considered unimportant and saved the organs they believed sacred. The Egyptians discarded the brains but kept the heart. They believed that the seat of true wisdom was not the mind, but the heart.

The power of the heart goes far beyond feeling and emotions; in the heart lies great wisdom and peace. In our culture, we tend to try to think things through. Certainly the rational process is important, but it must be tempered with intuitive understanding. In my seminars, I tell audiences, “Please point to yourself.” Nearly every person in the room points to their heart. Although they had a choice of many body parts, 99 percent of those asked sensed that they live in their heart. On some level, we remember that our heart contains the essence of who we are.

Practice consulting your heart before speaking or acting. If you are not sure what to say or do, take a moment, draw a few deep breaths, and feel what is happening in your chest. There you will find the most valuable guide to right action. If you find yourself upset or unhappy, ask your heart, “What would you have me know?” Employ all the worldly wisdom available, but when you want to know the most important truth, return to your heart. “This is what you must not miss.”

I pray to know the wisdom of my heart and act upon its sacred knowledge.

My heart guides me to right action.