[bluidkiti]

April 21

Step by Step

Today, I am okay! I will not let the clutter of my alcoholic past, its regrets and uncertainty about my future clutter my mind with preoccupation and neglect of today. If I cannot simply be and feel okay today, I have a weak foundation for any tomorrows. But I will not let worry about tomorrow impair me today. If today I do not drink, then I am more alive than I ever was when I was drinking. If I can make and keep today okay, then I am making some progress. Hopefully today’s progress will stretch into another 24 Hours and being okay will turn into something better. Today, I am okay. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

EARNING REWARDS

I got a religion that wants to take heaven out of the clouds and plant it right here on earth where most of us can get a slice of it.

~ Irwin Shaw ~

We learn that there are no free trips to abstinence. There aren’t any “rain checks” we can take that will give us a head start back to abstinence if we slip. We can’t argue that bad luck or betrayal by others were responsible for the relapse.

We won’t ever be promised that we will have overnight comfort or success. Our success in the Program is decided by how hard we work it. We will get from the Steps only as much as we give it. Our investment in serenity and security will earn simple, real interest. There aren’t any easy contests to win.

The rewards I receive from the Program will be equal to the effort I put into my recovery.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Love at first sight is easy to understand. It’s when two people have been looking at each other for years that it becomes a miracle.

~ Sam Levenson ~

True intimacy introduces us to ourselves. A loving relationship is the greatest therapy. When we first fall in love, we are filled with optimism and the greatest hopes for fulfillment of our dreams. We cling to all the best qualities of the person we fall in love with and we look past those things we don’t like. But living in an intimate partnership takes us beyond the edge of what we have learned. It is truly an adult developmental challenge.

Most of us fall in love and soon find ourselves in over our heads. We haven’t had experience as adults in sustaining the openness and vulnerability we have walked into. We may gradually begin to feel too vulnerable and exposed. The relationship tests our ability to trust someone who has this much access to our inner self. We are tempted to become cranky, edgy, or overly sensitive. We may test our partner’s love by asking, if you love me, will you do such and such? We begin to try to control our partner so we don’t feel so vulnerable. All these temptations are holdover behaviors from our less mature selves. So we must reach for our more mature selves, breathe deeply, and trust that we can survive while being so close and vulnerable.

Today I will turn to my Higher Power for guidance in going forward in trust while being vulnerable.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

We grow in darkness and in light.

~ Marilyn Mason ~

Every experience is a learning opportunity. The abuse we suffered, whether physical or emotional, taught us survival and resilience. Even though we felt defeated, we are here now, and we’ve learned to recognize relationships that aren’t good for us. That’s evidence of growth.

Sponsors tell us we are always growing. Even when it feels like we are going backward, we are growing. Recognizing our slower pace signals our awareness, and that is growth too.

Gone are the days when we doubted our ability to grow, to change. One of the first lessons we learn In recovery is that change is possible. Every meeting surrounds us with examples. And much of the growth has come through the dark periods of our lives. The darkness and the light have much to teach us. Every moment is to be revered for its message.

I am ready to grow today. Regardless of the kind of experience I’m having, I’ll realize its worth to me.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I want to relax more with people

In treatment it was painful to sit in a circle at group at first. Everybody could see me. I couldn’t hide or get away. Sometimes I even had to talk. I was afraid people wouldn’t like me or understand me (and then would look at me funny).

But after being with the group for several sessions, I was able to glance up at my fellow members when I was talking. Guess what? Nobody was looking at me funny at all. I think most were looking within themselves. After that, group got easier for me. Being able to talk in group has helped a lot.

Today I’ll practice looking at the person I am talking to (knowing I can look away at any time and feel safer).

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

More things are wrought by prayer than this world dreams of.

~ Alfred, Lord Tennyson ~

When we talk with our Higher Power, we admit to ourselves that we need help from a Power greater than ourselves. When we remind ourselves every moment of the day that we cannot live without our Higher Power sustaining us, we will seek an even closer relationship with God in order to grow and maintain our sobriety.

When we meditate on the word “power” we bring a new strength, new energy, and new dedication to our lives. We can draw on this power any time we choose. And we can use our new power through prayer.

When we pray, seeking God’s guidance every day, we learn to trust and depend on our Higher Power to help us through each day’s challenges. We are no longer alone.

Today let me surrender my life to my Higher Power and be grateful for his presence in my life.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

The present is the point of power.

~ Kate Green ~

Think of a recovery challenge you know you need to work on. If you look back to the past, you may consider that what you are currently facing is the same thing you have faced before and were unable to handle it. So you may use that as an excuse to avoid taking action now. If you look ahead to the future, you may consider putting off what you need to do today. Both approaches end up with the same result: you will not be able to handle what you are facing in the present. Do this for all the things on which you need to work, and you end up with an enormous accumulation of things you must eventually handle.

Living in the present moment means looking at what needs to be done in the present and taking care of those things. Taking action when action is needed provides you with more time, because as you take care of what you need to do today, you will have more time to handle the tasks of tomorrow. What have you been putting off in your recovery?

I will not let the things I need to do pile up. Today I will take care of something that needs my time and attention.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

Prayer is one of life’s most puzzling mysteries. I have sometimes feared it is presumptuous to take up God’s time with my problems.

~ Celestine Sibley ~

For too long, we may have believed there was no God. Or we may have believed there was an omniscient being who was highly judgmental, ready to bless us when we did good things but ready to curse us when we made mistakes. Our sense of spirituality may have been buried deep beneath layers of fear or lack of trust.

The program teaches us there is a Higher Power who’s there to listen to our prayers and meditations. But how do we learn to pray? What do we ask for? What do we say? Do we get down on our knees, bow our heads, or lift our faces to the heavens?

We need to remember that our Higher Power hears us, no matter how we choose to pray. Whether we spend several minutes talking aloud about our day or a few moments sitting still and clearing our minds of all thoughts, our Higher Power cares for us. What’s important is making the effort to pray.

Higher Power, help me to remember there is no mystery to prayer.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Reflecting kindness and love

We alcoholics and addicts can be sensitive to the remarks of loved ones and friends—at times they seem unkind to us. Yet if we ex-amine ourselves, we may see that we are the ones who are out of tune. Perhaps we have turned away from our Higher Power and stopped working our program.

It is important to realize that what we see in others often reflects what is within our-selves. If I am afraid, I will see fear in others. If I feel anxious, I will see anxiety in others. When we come to understand that turning back to our Higher Power and our program means getting back in tune, then we’ll be much less sensitive and our reflection will be soft and loving.

What does my reflection look like?

Lord, help me to take personal inventory and stay close to the program.

Today I will reflect kindness and love by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

I climbed the ladder of success wrong by wrong.

~ PATRICIA BROOKS ~

Newcomer

I’d like to go back to the old days, just for a little while. It’s so hard being sober every day, and in every situation. There were many things that using made easier.

Sponsor

Sometimes we look back on our days of active addiction with fondness. We miss the experiences that became available to us when we acted out. Depending on our history and drug of choice, we may remember times when we moved easily in social situations, talked or danced with greater ease, even entered relationships without a lot of fuss and agony. Or maybe we had a greater sense of power in work situations: we remember a time when we worked around the clock without feeling tired, triumphantly meeting a deadline. We may simply miss the drug itself, its familiar physical sensations or psychological effects.

It’s better to acknowledge this sense of loss than to ignore it. If we’re willing to go back, imaginatively, to what we think of as our days of freedom, then we can also remember what followed. Feelings of pleasure, expansiveness, or power eventually led to the very states we were attempting to anesthetize: exhaustion, dependency, self-dislike.

Today, I see the history of my addiction with clarity.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

The churches in their quarrels over purely sectarian issues have done much to divert attention from the primary purpose of religion, which is spirituality.

Some pastors take a more critical attitude toward the neglect of church duties than they do toward moral transgressions.

AA should be kept free of all controversial questions. We have but one purpose and that is to help the suffering alcoholic. Ours is a way of life; not a way of worship.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) SERENITY NOW

2) Not being able to ask for help is a real sign of weakness.

3) HOW: Honest Open Willing

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Footprints

One night a man had a dream. He dreamed he was walking along a beach with the Lord. Across the sky flashed scenes from his life. For each scene, he noticed two sets of footprints in the sand, one belonging to him, and the other to the Lord.

When the last scene of his life flashed before him, he looked back at the footprints in the sand. He noticed that many times along the path of his life there was only one set of footprints. He also noticed that it happened at the very lowest and saddest times in his life.

This really bothered him and he questioned the Lord about it. “Lord, You said that once I decided to follow You, You’d walk with me all the way. But I have noticed that during the most troublesome times in my life, there is only one set of footprints. I don’t understand why when I needed You most, You would leave me.”

The Lord replied, “My precious, precious child, I love you and I would never leave you. During your times of trial and suffering, when you see only one set of footprints, it was then that I carried you.”

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

EXCEEDING RIGHTEOUSNESS

Read Matthew 5:17-20

If anyone were so insane as to suppose that the knowledge of the Truth of Being could put him “above” the moral law, in the sense of authorizing him to break it, he would speedily discover that he had made a tragic mistake. The more spiritual knowledge that one possesses, the more severe is the punishment which one brings upon oneself by any infraction of the moral law. The Christian has to be very much more careful than other people. Indeed, all real spiritual understanding must necessarily be accompanied by definite moral improvement. A theoretical acceptance of the letter of Truth might go with moral carelessness (greatly to the peril of the delinquent), but it is impossible to make any real spiritual progress unless you are trying your very best to live the life. It is impossible to divorce true spiritual knowledge from right conduct.

For I say unto you, That except your righteousness shall exceed the righteousness of the scribes and Pharisees, ye shall in no case enter into the kingdom of heaven (Matthew 5:20)

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Beyond Duty

There are three impediments to enlightenment: Lust, fear, and duty.

~ Buddha ~

Jesus told the parable of a wealthy man who went through a town inviting the important people to a great feast. “Sorry, I have to work,” said one man.

“I’m on my way to bury a relative,” answered another. Everyone he asked could not come because they had something to do first. Finally, the man invited all the poor people in town, and they accepted because they had nothing else more pressing. Jesus likened the banquet to the kingdom of heaven, which we miss if we are caught up in worldly activities. Time and again Jesus affirmed that the kingdom of heaven is at hand, and we may enter it if we are open to receiving it.

The kingdom of heaven is just as available today as it was when Jesus pointed toward it. Since that time, we have invented even more duties that we believe we must perform before we can have peace. Begin to examine your sense of duty, and ask yourself where it comes from. Do you respond to the needs and wishes of others because you will feel guilty if you do not? Do you believe that you must play out the roles others tell you that you should fulfill to be a good daughter, son, wife, husband, employer, student, or disciple? Do you postpone joy because you believe you must first strive, suffer, or pay off karma?

Activities are valuable only if they bring us closer to peace. Relationships are healthy only as much as they reflect real love. Careers are important only for the aliveness they bring us and the service they render to others. To follow any creed that does not proceed from your heart is hypocrisy and psychic self-abuse. Begin to sincerely question your motives for social activities, and let go of anything that does not reflect a truth you believe from the inside out. Your life is too important to live for others. Come to the banquet now.

Bless me with the strength to live my spiritual truth and ideals.

I walk the path I believe in and let all else go.