Today's Thought - October

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October 16

A.A. Thought for the Day

Let us consider the term "spiritual experience" as given in Appendix II of the Big Book, Alcoholics Anonymous. A spiritual experience is something that brings about a personality change. By surrendering our lives to God as we understand Him, we are changed. The nature of this change is evident in recovered alcoholics. This personality change is not necessarily in the nature of a sudden and spectacular upheaval. We do not need to acquire an immediate and overwhelming "God-consciousness," followed at once by a vast change in feeling and outlook. In most cases, the change is gradual.

Do I see a gradual and continuing change in myself?

Meditation for the Day

"Come unto me all ye that labor and are heavy laden and I will give you rest." For rest from the care of life, you can turn to God each day in prayer and communion. Real relaxation and serenity come from a deep sense of the fundamental goodness of the universe. God's everlasting arms are underneath all and will support you. Commune with God, not so much for petitions to be granted as for the rest that comes from relying on His will and His purposes for your life. Be sure of God's strength available to you, be conscious of His support, and wait quietly until that true rest from God fills your being.

Prayer for the Day

I pray that I may be conscious of God's support today. I pray that I may rest safe and sure therein.

You are reading from the book:

Twenty-Four Hours a Day by Anonymous

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October 17

Say when it's time to begin.

I have a friend who is always planning to start a writing project "as soon as she gets organized." She has read nearly every book, attended every seminar, and bought all the tapes on the subject. She has closets full of organizers, drawers stuffed with folders, and several related computer programs. There's only one problem. Instead of starting, she hides behind a mask of "firsts." "I'll start writing, but first I've got to learn this program." "I'll listen to that tape, but first I've got to read this book."

Are you hiding behind a mask of firsts? Is there always something that keeps you from beginning? Take off the mask. Start the project. Ask that special person for a date. Do that Fourth and Fifth Step. Stop making excuses. Eliminate them.

Learn to say when it's time to begin.

God, please help me eliminate excuses from my life. Show me how full my life can be when I pursue my dreams.

You are reading from the book:

More Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie

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October 18

Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.
--Carl Jung

In our worst time, we have been irritable and difficult to live with. And when we feel most irritable, we are least likely to look at ourselves. Now in recovery, when someone irritates us, it is very useful to ask ourselves why we are so annoyed. We often find that the very thing that irritates us about someone else is the very quality in ourselves that we don't want to face.

When someone's whining bugs us, maybe it is our own capacity for whining that we reject. When someone's self-absorption gets under our skin, maybe we are sensitive about our own self-centeredness. Sometimes we find it easier to complain about a quality in others than to admit we are like that too.

Today I will use my feelings of irritation to guide me inward and know myself better.

You are reading from the book:

Wisdom to Know by Anonymous

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October 19

Reflection for the Day

"How does The Program work?" newcomers sometimes ask. The two answers I most often hear are "very well" and "slowly." I'm appreciative of both answers, facetious as they may first sound, because my self-analyzing tends to be faulty. Sometimes I've failed to share my defects with the right people; other times, I've confessed their defects, rather than my own; at still other times, my sharing of defects has been more in the nature of shrill complaints about my problems. The fact is that none of us likes the self-searching, the leveling of our pride, and the confession of shortcomings, which The Steps require. But we eventually see that The Program really works. Have I picked up the simple kit of spiritual tools laid at my feet?

Today I Pray

May God keep me from laying out my defects by comparing them to someone else's. We are, by nature, relativists and comparers, who think in terms of "worse than. . ." "not quite as bad as. . ." or "better than. . ." May I know that my faults are faults, whether or not they are "better than. . ." others'.

Today I Will Remember

Bad is bad, even when it is "better than."

You are reading from the book:

A Day at a Time (Softcover) by Anonymous

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October 20

Self-knowledge and self-improvement are very difficult for most people. It usually needs great courage and long struggle.
--Abraham Maslow

This is a simple program but it isn't easy. We cannot take the principles we learn and thereby possess them as if we were taking a class or reading a book. We need to live them. We can only get this program by participating with others who are also on the journey. Gradually we absorb it into every fiber of our being. This takes time and dedication.

The honesty required is sometimes frightening and painful. Anyone who remains faithful to this program has great courage and deserves deep respect. But we do not have to wait long to begin receiving the rewards. New freedoms, good feelings, and friendships quickly develop, and we are promised in this program to continue growing and to receive more benefits throughout our lives. What rewards have come from our courage and struggle?

I will give much to my spiritual growth because it gives much to me.

You are reading from the book:

Touchstones by Anonymous

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October 21

"We admitted we were powerless..."

Accepting that we cannot control other people's behavior is a huge step. We want what is best for them, don't we? Can't they see that? What we didn't understand before finding this program was that each individual is on a unique journey. What appears to us the best course to follow may not provide the lessons another person is here to learn.

And it may be dawning on us that one of our key lessons is how to give up trying to control someone else. Sometimes we believe we can control others because our goading or shaming gets them to give in and go along with our demands. However, we're really not in control. We are still powerless over them, and any time they want to make that clear, they will.

Accepting our powerlessness isn't a hopeless feeling at all, once we understand it. It offers us profound relief from the burden of responsibility for another person's life. In time this freedom will make us joyful.

Being in charge of only me today makes my day seem so much easier.

You are reading from the book:

A Life of My Own by Karen Casey

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October 22

It doesn't happen all at once.... You become. It takes a long time.
--Margery Williams

Our spiritual awakening is partly a process of becoming real. We're moving from the external controls of image and others' opinions to the internal controls of honesty, listening to our inner voice, and having true relationships. We are shedding the games that maintained our old style of life - "macho" or "hero" or "poor me."

In place of the old phony surface, we are developing a real relationship with ourselves. We are becoming more aware - of emotions, of need for rest, of violations of our values. Sometimes change comes in a flash of insight or a moment of sudden, piercing awareness, but more often it comes a little bit at a time. As we work the Steps, as we are true to our inner voice, as we keep returning to conscious contact with our Higher Power, as we get closer to our friends, we become more real to ourselves.

As I grow, I see that I was always real. I was just looking at the outside.

You are reading from the book:

Touchstones by Anonymous

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October 23

As a sponsor, remember you can carry the word, but not the person.

*****

When alcoholics are ready, you can't keep the program from them; when they're not, you can't give the program away.

*****

I didn't get what I wanted from AA;
I got what I needed.

*****

It's a lot easier to stay sober than to get sober.

*****

F.E.A.R.
False Evidence Appearing Real

You are reading from the book:

52 Weeks of Conscious Contact by Melody Beattie

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October 24

Program friendships are special

Until we came into the program we may have thought that friendships were all alike. We counted on friends to socialize and gossip with, maybe to share a secret with. But when we were really scared about our lives and the future, we felt too vulnerable to let anyone else know our innermost thoughts.

What relief the program has brought us and what good friends! No problem seems as terrifying now that we are no longer shouldering it alone. Having to make a decision no longer overwhelms us when we have other people to discuss it with. Letting ourselves be deeply cared for, with all our faults, is a new experience too. All these gifts come automatically to us within the fellowship. All that is asked of us is that we be a friend too.

I will extend my heart in friendship today, and my concerns will be lightened.

You are reading from the book:

A Life of My Own by Karen Casey

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October 25

Looking for beauty

It is important that we look for beauty.

There are beautiful things in the world each and every day, if we only know how to see.

In recovery, in serenity, beauty is everywhere – even in pain and suffering – if we only know how to see.

Higher Power, help me to use my recovery, my new vision, to see beauty.

You are reading from the book:

Day by Day - Second Edition by Anonymous

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October 26

Cheerfulness keeps up a kind of daylight in the mind, and fills it with a steady and perpetual serenity.
--Joseph Addison

Our Program allows us to stand back from day-to-day confusion and let serenity come into our lives. Our program doesn’t take away all the struggles and problems from life, but it does let us learn a different outlook and attitude.

We don’t have to get caught up in every storm that blows our way. We don’t have to live the pain of every person who crosses our path. We don’t have to right every wrong.

Our recovery is a gift to us from a power greater than we are. We become more and more aware of the meaning of the words in the Serenity Prayer: “God grant me the Serenity to accept the things I cannot change, Courage to change the things I can, and Wisdom to know the difference.”

Let me learn to see the world as it actually is, not as I want it to be. I trust that my Higher Power didn’t make a mistake in designing this world or the plans for my life.

You are reading from the book:

Easy Does It by Anonymous

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October 27

The reality is that changes are coming . . .They must come. You must share in bringing them.
--John Hersey

Change. It's scary. It's hard. It's needed. Sometimes it feels good; other times it feels bad. But one thing is for sure: it keeps on happening.

Just when our life seems settled, it changes. We can't stop life. We can't stay this age forever. The world changes. Life moves on. There are always new things to do and learn.

Change means we're always beginners in some ways. We need to ask for wisdom and courage. We get it by listening, by praying, by meditating. When we ask, our Higher Power will teach us to be part of good changes.

Prayer for the Day

Higher Power, help me believe that Your plans call for good changes.

Action for the Day

Today I'll think about the changes in my life. I've lived through a lot. I'll be okay when more changes come, with God's help. I can keep on growing.

You are reading from the book:

Keep It Simple by Anonymous

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October 28

This is a simple program for complicated people.
--Saying heard at meetings

Newcomer

I heard a speaker with years in recovery share that she'd always done it her own way - that she met friends at bars if she felt like it, had never had a sponsor, and sometimes went for months without a meeting. I know newcomers who've done similar things. What's the big deal?

Sponsor

Some people in recovery cling to rebellion. While they don't want to return to the horrors of active addiction, they aren't willing to surrender what they think of as individualism. They "get away with" skipping Steps and ignoring suggestions. One helps out at meetings, but keeps booze in the house. One gives advice to newcomers, but goes un-sponsored.

The program doesn't ask that we give up what truly makes each of us an individual. It offers us clear guidelines, and promises that if we follow them, we won't have to risk a relapse. The program works for us, if we work it. Testing our recovery by trying to see what we can "get away with" is like playing a game of Russian roulette.

Today, I feel safety and strength as I follow the principles of this program. I know that true individuality comes from the self-knowledge that recovery affords me.

You are reading from the book:

If You Want What We Have by Joan Larkin

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October 29

Learn to say I am

We hear a lot about becoming whole. "Become a complete human being." "Start on the pathway to becoming whole." "You won't find romantic love until you know you're complete." Frankly, these kinds of comments often confused me. But then I decided that wholeness relates directly to the process of detaching - letting go.

It's admirable to go after our dreams and know what we want to accomplish. But after we identify what it is we're after, we need to let it go. We need to know in our hearts and souls that we're okay whether we ever get what we're after or not.

Another friend described it this way, "It's the old Zen Buddhist thing," he said. "When you're one with yourself, life becomes magical. You can get whatever you want."

The most powerful and magical words we can say in the language of letting go are these: I am.

Then we step it up one notch by learning to say, I am complete just as I am.

God, help me know the power of the words I am.

You are reading from the book:

More Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie

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October 30

Humbly asked God to remove our shortcomings.
--Step Seven

In the Sixth and Seventh Steps of the program, we become willing to let go of our defects of character - issues, behaviors, old feelings, unresolved grief, and beliefs that are blocking us from the joy that is ours. Then we ask God to take them from us.

Isn't that simple? We don't have to contort ourselves to make ourselves change. We don't have to force change. For once, we don't have to "do it ourselves." All we have to do is strive for an attitude of willingness and humility. All we have to do is ask God for what we want and need, and then trust God to do for us that which we cannot do and do not have to do for ourselves.

We do not have to watch with bated breath for how and when we shall change. This is not a self-help program. In this miraculous and effective program that has brought about recovery and change for millions, we become changed by working the Steps.

Today, God, help me surrender to recovery and to the process by which I become changed. Help me focus on the Step I need. Help me do my part, relax, and allow the rest to happen.

You are reading from the book:

The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie