Even More Recovery Readings and Meditations - June

[bluidkiti]

June 11

Step by Step

Today, I will not fight anything and everything that comes my way, nor will I question why or complain that something is just another thing added to what I think is already a heavy burden. Today, I will simply be and accept what may come and ask God for His will to handle it and, if He deems, to let Him deal with it, and hopefully I might gain insight that I may be fighting myself needlessly and making sobriety and recovery a lot more complicated than they have to be. And if I continue to worry about something that is of valid and serious concern, I will trust unconditionally that my higher power will give me what I need to get through it even if how I want it to be resolved is not how He intends. Today, I will simply be and will not fight or plan for some crisis that may never be. I am. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

CHOICES

Before I came to the Program, I had no choice. I had to use. Now I have a choice.

~ Anonymous ~

One of the freedoms we enjoy is that of making choices. Only experience and the advice of others who are wiser than we can determine if our choices are right. Even if some are risky, we cannot settle for being wishy-washy. Straddling issues achieves nothing. .Bad choices can be corrected by second chances. There is no shame in delaying a choice while we examine all possibilities.

C.H.O.I.C.E. is Courage, Humility, Optimism, Industry, Caution, and Energy. When we choose recovery, we use all of these things. And the end result is H.A.P.P.I.N.E.S.S.: Humility, Awakening, Plenty, Program, Insight, New life, Excitement, Spirituality, and Serenity.

There is no “right” choice, only choices made after asking my Higher Power for direction and listening carefully for the answer. If I do that correctly and the choice still seems “wrong,” then I haven’t understood God’s will for me.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

In everyone’s heart stirs a great homesickness.

~ Rabbi Seymour Siegel ~

We ask ourselves, what drove us to do some of the things we did? We went to extremes when we knew our actions were not rational. Even today, we are drawn to extremes. At times we still long for things that we know will hurt us. Are we puzzled by these desires?

Wise men and prophets have searched their own deep truths to understand their desires and longings. Many say that our desires and hungers are, at the base of our being, a search for a spiritual home, a place where we know we are welcome, safe, and loved. Perhaps we are all born longing for that home. Maybe we first taste it when we first experience the warmth of loving and caring parents, even when it was only a taste, and only partially satisfied. Then we spend the rest of our lives in pursuit of that good feeling again.

The wisdom of the Twelve Steps points us toward that spiritual home. A lifetime of growth and development follows in which we feel the spirit in our fellowship with other men and women, and we learn from others how they have found their way home.

Today the stirring in my heart will be a sign of my spiritual longing.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

I am learning to nourish myself with affirmations. By adding a few short sentences each week, I am able to create a repository of truths to draw upon.

~ Laurel Lewis ~

Through our friends in recovery we are learning that we have always been lovable, even though we may have grown up in families where love was seldom expressed. We have been told that Mom and Dad raised us to the best of their ability, but that does not mean that we were given the affirmations or the gentle guidance that we needed as youngsters. Our parents were not able to pass on what they didn’t have, and old patterns die hard.

We are breaking the old patterns now. We are in recovery and learning to give ourselves the affirmations and gentle guidance that we failed to get from our families. We are sharing our personal stories and being loved for it. We are getting the positive strokes we deserve from friends. We are telling ourselves that we’re worthy of respect, love, and all the good that the universe holds.

I will create at least one affirmation today that will help me move in a more positive direction.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I want to become more assertive

One important issue I am working on in my dual recovery is assertiveness. I am tired of the anger and shame I feel when I don't speak up for myself or when I don't say what I want.

I believe I'm afraid to speak up‒perhaps because I'm afraid that if I do I'll hurt someone or perhaps I'll end up being hurt or rejected. (or even emotionally attacked). But through my support groups I'm learning two big things: (a) I have more courage and strength than I thought, and (b) people can take care of themselves.

I will practice saying what I think and what I want with two safe people: for starters, my therapist and my sponsor.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

Afoot and lighthearted I take to the open road,
Healthy, free, the world before me,
The long, brown path before me, leading wherever
I choose.

~ Walt Whitman ~

Being able to make free, healthy choices is a great gift and one that requires careful thought. The greatest choice we have made is our desire to live a sober life. It was a difficult one, but one that will lead us to other healthy choices. Living one day at a time, we choose what is important in our lives and what is not. We learn to make healthy decisions — those decisions which promote our recovery and a peaceful life. It helps to remember that we are human; just because we are sober doesn’t mean we will always make the right choice. Working our program gives us all the tools we need to make choices for who we are and what we are to become.
But if we fall back into our old behavior and make some bad decisions, we will learn from those, too. Growth comes not only with success but with failure, too. Now, our mistakes can help us grow and become stronger every day.

Today let me choose from my heart what is best for my recovery.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

My defenses were so great. The cocky rock and roll hero who knows all the answers was actually a terrified guy who didn’t know how to cry.

~ John Lenon ~

When you choose to suppress, rather than express, your feelings, they have a tendency to emerge in other ways. You may be able to keep them under control for a while, but eventually they will build up like the steam in a pressure cooker and reach a point where they need to be released. This is especially true when you are afraid. Fear can sometimes escalate into a panic attack, particularly during stressful times.

Whenever you feel fear, remember that you are not the first or only person to feel scared or anxious in recovery. Then ask yourself, “What am I afraid of?” By taking a more rational, analytical approach to your fear—even by making a list of those things that scare you—you will gain greater understanding of what frightens you.

Perhaps you are afraid you will fail in your recovery. Maybe you are terrified to think about your childhood and stir up memories you have long suppressed. Or maybe you are anxious about making amends to someone. Identify what it is you are afraid of—and then conquer your fear by taking action.

No matter what I do today, I will not allow myself to be paralyzed by fear or anxiety.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

So I can't sink down and let the time of my real being take me, for if I try and for a moment can see no direction, cannot tell where I am going I am filled with panic, scared of emptiness. I must be doing something. . . .

~ Joanna Field ~

Imagine for a moment that we have no plans for tomorrow. No job to get up for or classes to attend, no errands to run. At first we may think this is delightful, but we need to think back to the last occasion we had time to spend alone.

Did we sit comfortably, clearing our minds of all thought and tension to listen to our inner selves? Or did we immediately turn on the television, reach for a book, or aimlessly putter?

We may be afraid to sit alone in our stillness. Yet when we allow our inner selves to be heard without background noise or the diversions of projects or hobbies, we will begin to discover our inner thoughts are creative and stimulating and intuitive. We will begin to discover ourselves.

Tonight I can take fifteen minutes to lie quietly with myself. If I have to ask what I will think about, I know I can Let Go and Let God.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Being an addict

Sometimes people feel more qualified to be members of the program because they feel they have suffered more physical deprivation. But this does not really matter: An addict is an addict, pain is pain, suffering is suffering.

You can be an addict and suffer whether you have holes in your pants or a new suit, an empty belly or a full one.

Do I realize that addiction and suffering are a state of mind?

Higher Power, help me see that pain is pain and that I cannot judge it for anyone.

Today I will help those who still suffer, whether rich or poor, by

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

I take a breath when I have to.

~ ETHEL MERMAN ~

Newcomer

There’s someone in my life for whose welfare I’m responsible. I feel frustrated and angry. I’m doing what I’m supposed to do, but I’m not getting much cooperation. Today, I feel invisible.

Sponsor

Caregiving, whether of a new baby, an older child, a sick partner or friend, or an aging parent, is demanding work under any circumstances. Some of us have full-time jobs caring for others—we’re parents, nurses, medical aides, social workers, therapists, pastors, teachers. Many of us have no choice but to continue in our roles as caregivers, even while we’re going through the immense upheaval of early recovery.

If we find ourselves enjoying the taste of martyrdom, it’s time to air out our egos. Part of our work in recovery is learning to have respect for our physical and emotional limitations, avoiding resentment and burnout. We may need to get to a meeting and let off some steam. We may need to take time for a walk, a swim, a nap, or something that nurtures us and recharges our batteries. We may need to let go of our perfectionism.

Today, there’s only one thing I need to do perfectly, and that is to stay away from my drug of choice.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

Don’t kid yourself, pal. You want to drink but you can’t. You never can. Admit it. Accept it−then forget it.

You can get sobriety−so get it, keep it and like it.

It’s as simple as that.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

RIGHT LIVING

From the cowardice that dare not face new truth
From the laziness that is contented with half-truth
From the arrogance that thinks it knows all truth,
Good Lord, deliver me.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

CASH THAT BILL!

Within you is an inexhaustible source of power, if you can but contact it. That power can heal you, and it can inspire you by telling you what to do and how to do it. It can give you peace of mind, and, above all, it can give you direct knowledge of God. That power is scientific prayer. There is no problem that prayer cannot overcome and no good thing that it cannot bring into your life.

This is the message of the whole Bible. It was summed up by Jesus when he said,

. . . the kingdom of God is within you (Luke 17:21).

This truth was dramatically illustrated by an incident in real life. The body of a tramp, clad in rags, was discovered near a lime kiln where he had evidently crept for warmth. After the autopsy his clothes were torn up to be put into the incinerator, and sewn into the lining of the trousers was a bank note for a large amount. Unquestionably the original owner of the suit had had ir sewn in there for safety, and for some unknown reason lost track of it.
Consider the situation! This poor hobo had sat down many a time to lukewarm coffee−and all the time he was sitting on a thousand dollars. People may have plenty of money and yet be hoboes for health or happiness or spiritual experience. Riches do not become wealth until they are realized. Cash your bill at the Bank of Heaven and make it productive.

But my God shall supply all your need. . . (Philippians 4: 19).

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Fearless

I am at home. Fear is the stranger here.

~ A Course in Miracles ~

In the film Fearless, Jeff Bridges portrays a man named Max who narrowly escapes death in a plane crash. In surrendering to imminent death, he loses all fear, and when he goes on with his life, he finds himself unafraid in a world motivated by mistrust and deception. His lawyer wants him to lie to exact a larger settlement from the airline company; his wife cannot handle the truth he is now unafraid to tell about their numb relationship; and his psychologist thinks he has gone mad (while he has actually gone sane).

In a poignant scene, Max momentarily gives in to pressure to lie, which leaves him painfully contracted. To vent the horror he feels, he climbs onto the roof of a tall building and screams at the top of his lungs. Watching this symbolic scene, I wondered how loud would be the cries of humanity if we all went up on a roof and screamed at the top of our lungs in proportion to the pain and constriction we have experienced by living in ways that are inconsistent with our true nature.

Fear is not our ordained condition. Psychologists tell us that infants are born with only two fears-that of falling, and loud noises; every other fear is learned. Fear is not a reality, because if it were, everyone would be afraid of the same things.

To live in fear is not natural, and neither is it our destiny. Our destiny is to live in peace and express joy. Dump fear by trusting life to provide for you as you live your truth.

Help me to see beyond the illusion of fear and walk in strength and freedom.

Love is my nature. My trust manifests miracles.