Even More Recovery Readings and Meditations - June

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June 13

Step by Step

"(Alcoholics) have one symptom in common: they cannot start drinking without developing the phenomenon of craving. This phenomenon ...may be the manifestation of an allergy which differentiates these people, and sets them apart as a distinct entity. It has never been ...permanently eradicated. The only relief we have to suggest is entire abstinence." - Alcoholics Anonymous, 3rd Edition, 1976, "The Doctor's Opinion," p xxviii.

Today, no illusion that I may again be able to drink responsibly. The risk is too high, its costs potentially lethal. I will not try "just one" or "controlled" drinking with the myth or desperate thought that I can undo by returning to the thing that ravaged me physically, emotionally and spiritually - alcohol. If the physician is right that we as problem drinkers have a craving for alcohol, any amount of it is paramount to a relapse from which I might not return. Today, I accept that I am an alcoholic, that I cannot play the game of by-passing that fact and, in so doing, I refuse to fuel the craving. Today, I have a choice: I will not drink. And our common journey continues. Step by step. - Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

The future shall know when it has come; before then, forget it"

~ Aesclhylus ~

The Fellowship keeps us grounded in the current moment. We learn to live today. Our planning and scheming and dreaming about tomorrow becomes less time consuming. The idea of living one day at a time makes sense to us. Our Program teaches us that life is not about to happen, it is happening, and each moment is important.

When we concentrated only on the future, we couldn't be happy with today. We thought if we could only get to tomorrow, things would be better. Tomorrow never comes, so we were always trapped in a hopeless situation. Now we live one day at a time, and grow moment by moment.

Recovery is about today and living life in the present. Since I no longer have to manage the universe, I have only myself to worry about today. I can let my Higher Power take care of tomorrow.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

To the rationally minded, the mental processes of the intuitive appear to work backward. His conclusions are reached before his premises.

~ Frances Wickes ~

Intuition is a valuable form of wisdom that often seems mystical. We lose our keys and can’t find them in any of the usual places and then an idea pops into our mind about where to find them. When we look there, we find them. Only after the fact can we explain— maybe—why that spot came to mind. That’s intuition. Or, on a higher plane, we have a feeling that a certain choice in our life would be a big mistake, or one day, for no clear reason, we expect our partner to tell us something important.

The wisdom of our intuition deserves our great respect. It is a valuable guide. Even though it is not 100 percent accurate, and we cannot expect it to be, we should not violate ourselves by contradicting it. Instead, we grow by developing our intuition, listening to what we imagine and what we feel, and following our instincts. Intuition is another form of spiritual strength.

Today I will listen to my inner feelings about things, even when I don’t immediately understand them rationally.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

Life is like an unbridled horse.

~ Kay Lovatt ~

Many of us thought we knew where we were going after we finished school. We selected a path that fit our personality, we thought. Motherhood, a career, or both. Perhaps a single life or a low-stress job. Our friends suited our choices. So did our homes, our hobbies, our dreams. But then something happened. We didn’t plan on addiction. Our drinking or drug use seemed social, at least initially. Where did the path veer? Why didn’t we see the changes in store?

Life is full of surprises. Many are unwanted at first. But if we’re willing to accept them as opportunities, we can discover greater meaning for our lives. Twelve Step recovery is one of those opportunities. Many new changes are in store. We may no longer know where we are going, but we will get to where we need to be. Let’s hang on and enjoy the ride.

I am on the right course even if I don’t know exactly where it leads. I will let my trusted friends take the lead today.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I am learning about decisions

These days I'm having trouble making decisions. It's not that I'm deciding to get married or quit my job. It's making simple, everyday choices like what to do next; what to eat; do I call for support or not; do I go for a walk or stay at home and rest. I guess this is part of my emotional illness, but I feel tense and out of control when it happens.

But through my recovery group I am learning one thing that may help me get moving: a decision is not forever. I don't have to feel stuck because I have choices. I can make one choice and later change my mind.

Today I will promptly make two decisions, knowing I have the right to change my mind if I want to.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

Healthy anger—when I defend myself against an attack designed to destroy me — springs from self-respect.

~ Lee M. Silverstein ~

Anger is a way we regain our sense of self- respect and entitlement. We realize now that nothing is worth feeling like a doormat. We naturally feel angry when attacked, but we may lack the skills we need to appropriately channel our feelings. Sometimes confrontation is necessary, other times we are best served by turning things over to our Higher Power. Whatever we need when we are angry, sober living equips us with the tools to identify and share our angry feelings, and to find new options to help us maintain our dignity.

Now we can be thankful for our newfound ability to see more clearly what our anger is about and how we can deal with it. Now we can use and appreciate this healthy internal “alarm system” to grow and change. And we can turn our anger over and let go of lingering resentments on a daily basis.

Today let me share my anger honestly and then let go of it.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

What lies behind you and what lies in front of you pales in comparison to what lies inside of you.

~ Ralph Waldo Emerson ~

Imagine that today represents the starting line to a race. Behind you are the months of training that infused your mind, body, and spirit with great strength and stamina. Ahead of you lies the finish line, at a point you cannot yet see.

You understand that as you race from the starting line to the finish line, you will face many challenges. But no matter what lies ahead of you or what the conditions will be, trust that you have the strength to face it—and to conquer it. Recovery shows you that you have, within you, a strength you never realized you had. This strength is so powerful that it can overcome an addiction. This strength is so dedicated that it can overcome dishonesty. This strength is so determined that it can overcome negativity.

Recovery is a platform from which healthy living springs. What you learn in the program and how you grow in the program is applicable to everything you do. Embrace everything you have learned in your recovery. Let this lead you to the finish line in any task you undertake today.

Recovery is my training program for life. It strengthens me so I can face and conquer any challenge.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

This time, like all times, is a very good one if we but know what to do with it.

~ Ralph Waldo Emerson ~

Is the glass half full or half empty? We know the answer to that question can symbolically reflect whether we have a positive or negative outlook on life. If we see the glass as half empty, we focus on what is gone. But if we say the glass is half full, we see what remains.

If we're full of ideas about how to spend our time, then our outlook is positive and we'll not waste a second. But if we're feeling bored or directionless or lonely, our days may be filled with a lot of negative energy and wasted moments.

Instead of focusing on what we don't have, we can change our attitude and look at what we do have. We have choices about how we want to spend our time. The decisions we make will have a direct bearing on how meaningful each day will be.

How can I change my attitude and make each day full?

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Doing our best

Doing our best takes more time and energy, but the rewards are great. In staying clean and sober, it may mean feeling in tune, feeling committed, feeling successful—in short, serenity.

For many of us the fear of failure keeps us from putting everything we have into living. And when we don’t succeed, we always have the ready excuse, “I wasn’t really trying.” But the more we give to anything, the more we have to give, and the better we feel about ourselves.

Do I always put forth my best effort?

Higher Power, help me to accept my fear and do my best.

I will do my best today— even if I feel afraid—to

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

All deception is self-deception.

~ SHIRLEY ELIAS ~

Newcomer

I needed a day off so badly last week that I called in sick. Then I felt uncomfortable all day. It reminded me of the way I used to feel when I was active in my addiction. Was what I did so terrible?

Sponsor

Whatever we choose to do has an impact on ourselves and others, and being sober and clear, we’re more aware of that impact. Telling a “harmless” lie in recovery may not affect other people or institutions in the long run as seriously as it affects us. When we lie in recovery, we ourselves suffer the consequences. We have feelings much like those we experienced when we were using. Fear, secrecy, guilt, and low self-esteem isolate us and may lead to our wanting to act out our addictions. Perhaps next time you need a “mental health day” away from work, you’ll ask for a personal day or vacation day instead of setting yourself up for a slip by faking illness.

Honesty in small things as well as large can get to be a habit that simplifies our lives and enhances our recovery. It’s freedom!

Today, my honesty gives me strength as I take actions appropriate to a person in recovery.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

It takes very much more skill to erect a house than it does to tear one down. Jesus of Nazareth could be crucified but His teachings could not be killed. His influence today exceeds that of all the Caesars, the Hannibals, the Napoleons and the Alexanders rolled into one.

These elementary truths were taught in differing forms by other religious teachers before and after His time. The principles of the Golden Rule are as old as civilization, for it is the very basis of civilization.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

OUR MEETING ROOM DOOR

Dear God,
Make the door of this meeting wide enough
To receive all who need love and fellowship
And narrow enough to shut out
All envy, pride, and hate.
Make its threshold smooth enough
To be no stumbling block to anyone,
Nor to those who have strayed,
But rugged enough to turn back
The tempters power:
Make it a gateway
To Thine eternal kingdom.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

USE THAT BROOM!

A good housekeeper sees to it that dust and din do not accumulate in nooks and comers and on shelves. Periodically, the house is gone over and given a thorough cleaning. Too often in our spiritual lives, we allow negative things to accumulate in the comers of our minds. We tackle the obvious problems as they come along, but allow the small difficulties to pile up in the comers.

For instance, if we are faced with a problem of health or finance, we get to work on that immediately but if, on the other hand, someone has injured us, instead of handling the incident spiritually at the time, we ruck it away and perhaps pack in a little resentment along with it. Such problems should be dealt with as they arise. If someone has injured you, forgive him now, and be done with it. Take care of the other difficulties in like manner.

Be a good housekeeper. Clean out every nook and comer−and God will make you worthy of greater accomplishments in the future.

And he said unto him, Well done , thou good servant: because thou hath been faithful in a very little, have thou authority over ten cities (Luke 19:17).

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Beyond the Rap

Turn your melodrama into a mellow drama.

~ Ram Dass ~

The Heartbreak Kid is a hilarious film that chronicles the misadventures of a young man named Lenny (played by Charles Grodin) who attempts to bamboozle his way through social situations. When Lenny meets the girl of his dreams (Cybill Shepherd), he tells her, "l think it's time we stopped taking from the earth, and started putting back into it." A good philosophy, to be sure—except that Lenny is full of hot air; he uses the same spiel with everyone he meets.

Eventually, the couple gets married, and the final scene of the film depicts our hero at his wedding reception sitting on a couch between two 10-year-old children. "l think it's time we stopped taking from the earth..." he drones. The kids, bored to tears, look at each other, roll their eyes, and promptly get up and walk away. His rap fails to impress anyone.

Many of us, too, have our "rap"—a story we've told a thousand times. We tell it because it gets us attention, upholds our chosen image (often as a victim), and relieves us of social malaise. But falling back on our rap is always self-defeating because we're hiding behind our story line. We use our rap to escape from being fully present.

lf I find myself telling a particular story based on my drama more than three times, a little "rap alarm" goes off in my head. I recognize that I'm trying to milk the story for more than it's worth, and I'm hurting myself by hiding behind it. I see if I can tell a deeper truth, or just let it go. My rap has become shorter and shorter, and has mostly disappeared, allowing me to be fully present rather than fall back on a story.

Today I walked naked as myself. I discard any armor and allow myself to shine.

The truth about me is greater than any story I could fabricate.