Sharing and Caring

[MajestyJo]

April 17

Resolve to be thyself; and know that who finds himself, loses his misery.
--Matthew Arnold

Our need for approval compels us to try to look good - no matter what's going on. We imagine that somehow everything will be okay as long as it looks okay. Our hearts may be breaking from fear, disillusionment, and rejection, real or imagined, but we keep smiling so that no one will guess. Why do we do this to ourselves? Is it so hard to turn to a friend and say, "Hey, I'm hurting. I've been having a bad time and I need help"? Would the earth tremble if we said it right out, just like that?

We're not likely to get what we don't ask for. Instead of denying that our knees are shaking, our hands are sweating, and our stomachs are in torment, we can admit and share the truth. We don't have to say "Fine!" when someone in the program asks us how we're doing. Our real friends aren't impressed by stiff upper lips; they're impressed by personal honesty.

Today, I will tell someone the truth about how I feel. If I'm not fine I won't say that I am.

You are reading from the book:

Days of Healing, Days of Joy by Earnie Larsen and Carol Larsen Hegarty

Really liked this reading today. How often when asked how we are, we say, "Oh, I am just fine." We minimize how we feel or discount our feelings. Most of us know that fine means: Frustrated, insecure, neurotic, and emotions or enjoying it. Some say totally flocked up, but I prefer to say frustrated, but that is generally the true feeling along with fear. To get in this stage, it is because I have let go of faith, and not only lost faith in myself, but blocked out God because I have blocked out the negative and therefore, blocked out out any goodness from getting in too.

I need to look at how to change the negative into a positive. If I feel crappy, acknowledge it and then look at how I can change it; instead of ignoring it and hoping it will go away.