More Recovery Readings - June

[bluidkiti]

June 5

You are reading from the book Today's Gift.
To render ourselves insensible to pain we must forfeit also the possibilities of happiness. --Sir John Lubbock
A caterpillar knows instinctively that it must spin a cocoon. When finished it will use the protection it has made to turn itself into a beautiful butterfly. When the time is right, the butterfly will break through the cocoon and stretch its wings to meet the world.
We sometimes protect ourselves by withdrawing into a cocoon of our own. We stop talking to others and find ourselves growing lonely and longing for our friends. Perhaps it was some pain that made us retreat, but the pain of loneliness is greater. When we have the courage to break out of our cocoon, knowing and accepting the fact that we will experience both pain and happiness, we will change. We will become, for that moment, something new and beautiful like the butterfly.
What fearful thing do I have the courage to face today?


You are reading from the book Touchstones.
Where there is no strife there is decay: "The mixture which is not shaken decomposes." --Heraclitus
Transitions and changes are often painful, sometimes frightening. Often the most troubled lives are those most unyielding to change. When we become so committed to stability that we cannot flow with the never- ending river of life, we wither and die spiritually. Every one of us has changes moving within our lives. Some changes are beneath the surface and we only vaguely sense them. Others are obvious and we are dealing with their effects. When we see change only as a problem or as pain, we have a harder time getting on with our lives.
Looking back, we can see other changes we would never have chosen or planned for ourselves. We can see now that we grew with them. Change forced us into new realms, and we found sides of ourselves we hadn't known before. Through whatever strife and difficulty of change we face today, we have a stable program to fall back on. And we have our relationship with our Higher Power which is with us through all times.
I will try to have a lighter grip upon life today so that as the river of change flows, I can flow with it.


You are reading from the book Each Day a New Beginning.
The level of anxiety I feel when an attractive woman enters the room is the cue informing me of my closeness to God at that moment. --Anonymous
Our security lies now and always in our relationship with God. When we are spiritually connected, we don't lack confidence, self-assurance. We don't doubt our value to those around us. Having an active friendship with our God keeps us ever aware that whatever is right for each of us at this time will be given us, that each other person in our life is also on a divinely ordained path going somewhere special to her growth.
It's unfortunate, but true, that many of us had painful experiences with other women earlier in our lives. Maybe we lost a lover or a husband to someone we knew. And it's difficult to believe that what is right for us will come to us, that we need never fear another woman.
The program offers us daily opportunities to take stock of our assets in order to know that we count. And more importantly, it promises security and serenity if each day we invite our higher power to be our companion. We need never fear someone else's presence. Nor need we fear any new situation. With God at our side, all is well. And we'll know it!
I will make God my friend today and enjoy the ease of living.


You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go.
Combating Shame
Shame can hold us back, hold us down, and keep us staring at our feet.
-- Beyond Codependency
Watch out for shame.
Many systems and people reek of shame. They are controlled by shame and may want us to play their game with them. They may be hoping to hook us and control us through shame.
We don't have to fall into their shame. Instead, we'll take the good feelings - self-acceptance, love, and nurturing.
Compulsive behaviors, sexually addictive behaviors, overeating, chemical abuse, and addictive gambling are shame-based behaviors. If we participate in them, we will feel ashamed. It's inevitable. We need to watch out for addictive and other compulsive behaviors because those will immerse us in shame.
Our past, and the brainwashing we may have had that imposed "original shame" upon us, may try to put shame on us. This can happen when we're all alone, walking through the grocery store or just quietly going about living our life. Don't think. . . . Don't feel. . . . Don't grow or change. . . .Don't be alive. . . . Don't live life. . . . Be ashamed!
Be done with shame. Attack shame. Go to war with it. Learn to recognize it and void it like the plague.
Today, I will deliberately refuse to get caught up in the shame floating around in the world. If I cannot resist it, I will feel it, accept it, and then be done with it as quickly as possible. God, help me know that it's okay to love myself and help me to refuse to submit to shame. If I get off course, help me learn to change shame into guilt, correct the behavior, and move forward with my life in immediate self-love.


Peace and relaxation flow through me with every breath that I take. I am complete in this moment. --Ruth Fishel

**************************************************

Journey To The Heart

What Are You Trying to Prove?

You don’t have to prove anything to anyone. Not even to yourself.

A subconscious desire to prove ourselves may be hiding at the root of our fears, the root of our tension, the root of our need to do and be more. Accompanying it can be a burning belief that we aren’t good enough, that we need to compensate for some deficiency in ourselves in order to take our place on this planet.

We may feel like we have to earn our place, earn our right to be here. Like we’re being watched and judged, graded.

You don’t have to prove anything to anyone. You’re fine just the way you are. You have energy, vitality. You have particular gifts and talents. You have been learning your lessons just right in your life.

Let go of the need to prove yourself to others– to parents, people from the past, people in your life today. Could it be the one you’ve really been trying to prove something to is yourself. The answer is simple: learn to approve of yourself. Love and accept yourself the way you are today. Then step right up and take your place in the universe.

**************************************************

More Language Of Letting Go

You don’t have to exert that much control

“Hey killer, how about relaxing the old death grip there.”

Why did he always say that? Probably because I always got nervous and held the yoke too tightly. Rob, my flight instructor, was teaching me basic maneuvers in the little Cessna 172 trainer again. He wanted me to put the plane into a steep turn. The only problem was that every time I tried, I felt as though the little plane would fall out of the sky. I know. It’s crazy. But knowing didn’t help my feeling very much.

“Here, watch this. I have the controls,” Rob said. And taking the controls, my instructor put the plane into a sharply banked turn. Then he let go of the yoke.” “Aaaah!” I yelled. Nothing happened. The little airplane kept turning with no further input from anyone. “You see,” Rob explained, “when you have the trim setting adjusted right, the airplane will do what you tell it to do. There’s no need to force it. Now relax and try again.”

I did, and the turn was better this time. Maybe the plane wouldn’t fall out of the sky after all. And another small piece of the puzzle got filled in.

There are many things that we can do to keep our lives on course. We can talk to our mentors and sponsors, read positive books, attend support groups, listen to positive music, pray, meditate, work a recovery program if we’re in one, and grow. We don’t want to become complacent. Safety consciousness is important. But once we have set ourselves on course, it isn’t necessary to constantly be worried about falling out of the sky.

Set your plan in motion. Get on the right track. But remember that if saving your life is important, it is also important to have a life worth saving. Relax a little. The plane will keep on flying as long as you give it the right input.

God, grant me the grace to relax, to let go of worry and self-doubt, and to let myself enjoy life and the experiences that it has to offer.

**************************************************

Coming out of a Haze

by Madisyn Taylor

We cannot predict when a fog will come or when it will lift, but we can center ourselves in the haze and wait for guidance.


When we feel muddled and unfocused, unsure of which way to turn, we say we are in a fog. Similar to when we are in a fog in nature, we may feel like we can’t see where we’re going or where we’ve come from, and we’re afraid if we move too quickly we might run into something hidden in the mists that seem to surround us. Being in a fog necessarily slows us down by limiting our visibility. The best choice may be to pull over and wait for the murkiness to clear. If we move at all, we must go slowly, feeling our way and keeping our eyes open for shapes emerging from the haze, perhaps relying on the taillights of someone in front of us as we make our way along the road.

By and large, most of us prefer to be able to see where we are going and move steadfastly in that direction, but there are gifts that come from being in a fog. Sometimes it takes an obstacle like fog to get us to stop and be still in the moment, doing nothing. In this moment of involuntary inactivity, we may look within and find that the source of our fogginess is inside us; it could be some emotional issue that needs tending before we can safely go full steam ahead. Being in a fog reminds us that when we cannot see outside ourselves, we can always make progress by looking within. Then again, the fog may simply be teaching us important lessons about how to continue moving forward with extreme caution, harnessing our attention, watching closely for new information, and being ready to stop on a dime.

We cannot predict when a fog will come, nor can we know for certain when it will lift, but we can center ourselves in the haze and wait for guidance. We may find it inside ourselves or in a pair of barely visible taillights just ahead. Whether we follow the lights out of the fog, wait for a gentle breeze to lift it, or allow the sun to burn it away, we can rest certain that one way or another, we will move forward with clarity once again. Published with permission from Daily OM

**************************************************

A Day at a Time

Reflection for the Day
The Program teaches me that not too many people can truthfully assert that they love everybody. Most of us have to admit that we've loved but a few and that we've been quite indifferent to the many. As for the rest, well, we've really disliked or hated them. We in The Program find we need something much better than this in order to keep our balance. The idea that we can be possessively loving of a few, can ignore the many and can continue to fear or hate anyone at all, has to be abandoned - if only a little at a time.

At meetings, do I concentrate on the message rather than the messenger?

Today I Pray
May I understand that there is no place in my recovery - or in my entire life as a chemically dependent person - for toxic hatred or lackadaisical indifference. One of the most important positive ideas that I must carry with me is that all humans, as the children of God, make up a loving brother-and-sisterhood. May I find it hard to hate a brother.

Today I Will Remember
Hear the message. Don't judge the messenger.