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Humor "We Are Not A Glum Lot." Share Articles, Humor, Inspirations, Jokes, News, Poems, Quotes, Writings, etc. Here. Keep It Clean Please.

 
 
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Old 12-31-2017, 06:47 AM   #1
bluidkiti
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Default Observations on Growing Older

Observations on Growing Older

TODAY IS THE OLDEST YOU'VE EVER BEEN, YET THE YOUNGEST
YOU'LL EVER BE, SO ENJOY THIS DAY WHILE IT LASTS.

~Your kids are becoming you...and you don't like them...but your grandchildren are perfect!

~Going out is good.. Coming home is better!

~When people say you look "Great"... they add "for your age!"

~When you needed the discount, you paid full price. Now you get discounts on everything... movies, hotels, flights, but you're too tired to use them.

~You forget names .... but it's OK because other people forgot they even knew you!!!

~The 5 pounds you wanted to lose is now 15 and you have a better chance of losing your keys--than the 15 pounds.

~Your spouse is counting on you to remember things you don't remember.

~Your husband sleeps better on a lounge chair with the TV blaring than he does in bed. It's called his "pre-sleep."

~Remember when your mother said, "Wear clean underwear in case you GET in an accident"? Now you bring clean underwear in case you HAVE an accident!

~You miss the days when everything worked with just an "ON" and "OFF" switch..

~When GOOGLE, ipod, email, modem were unheard of, and a mouse was something that made you climb on a table.

~You tend to use more 4 letter words ... "what?"..."when?"... ???

~You read 100 pages into a book before you realize you've read it.

~Notice everything they sell in stores is "sleeveless"?!!!

~What used to be freckles are now liver spots.

~Everybody whispers.

~Now that your husband has retired .... you'd give anything if he'd find a job!

~You have 3 sizes of clothes in your closet...2 of which you will never wear.
__________________
"No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy
AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K.
When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt
We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time!
God says that each of us is worth loving.
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