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Daily Recovery Readings Start your day here with Daily Recovery Readings. Feel Free To Share Your Experience, Strength & Hope.

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Old 06-09-2016, 04:37 PM   #1
melonina
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Icon25 Things that kept me sober for a year

Hello everyone! When I joined to bluidkiti and started reading a lot of nice quotes and thoughts I started thinking about why I and how it happened that I decided to quit drinking. I was a heavy drinker for nearly 4 years. It all started when my first business got bankrupted and I just didn't know what to do. I couldn't cope with all the stress and debt I was in. But eventually, after long 4 years of drinking and existing I woke up one Saturday morning with a massive headache, still feeling drunk from the previous night. I remember going to the bathroom and looking at my reflection in the mirror and feeling disguised with myself. My hair was stuck together from the vomit and I looked literally like a zombie. Then I told myself - THAT'S ENOUGH.

However, I remember when I decided to quit drinking I didn't know how to live without the substance anymore. It seems to me now that everything I did in my free time used to involve alcohol. I drank literally everywhere apart from work. Well, there were a few occasions when I had a secret pint during a lunch break. But anyways..
I'm gonna share a few things which worked for me to stay sober for a year now. Hopefully, it will help someone.

The tricks I used were a bit childish from my perspective, but it worked for me.
First of all, If you drink at home, I suggest giving away all the bottles you still have to your friends/relatives or homeless people, whoever you choose. Or just simply throw it away. But make sure that you wouldn't take it out of the garbage. I poured all the alcohol I had into the sink (because no-one knew that I'm quitting and I wanted it to stay that way for the time being), so I wouldn't be tempted.
If you tend to drink when you get back home after work or at certain times, make sure you are busy doing something when the time comes. I signed up to yoga classes, so it kept me away from home and old habits every other day. When there was nicer weather, I drove to the sea and had long walks on the beach. I'm quite a responsible person, so I know that I won't drink if I have to drive. It made me stay away from shops or pubs. If you're taking someone for a drive, make sure that the person knows that you're quitting. Or take a friend without driving's licence. It will make you feel a bit more responsible.
If you're going out and you know that you'll be tempted to have a drink or two (or 10+ as in my example), take a friend with you who doesn't drink. Or drink fizzy drinks. It will fill you up and give you some energy from sugars... However, I tried to stay away from pubs, clubs, parties and everything that involved alcohol for like 2 months until I felt more comfortable in my own skin and knew that I can deal with it.
What is more... Make a list of things that you really want to do but can never find money for it. It can be simple as buying a new pair of shoes, bike, etc. or big things like going to Spain or Disneyland. Print the pictures of the things you want and put them everywhere, especially the places where you used to drink like in front of TV, etc. And then put the amount of money, which you used to spend on alcohol in a piggy bank every day. The list will keep you motivated and you will get a prize in the end! That's how I found out that I actually love travelling

By the way, I heard that going to the sauna 3 days in row helps you get rid of a fair amount of toxins from the alcohol through sweat. And it becomes slightly easier to quit.

I'm not sure if I can post links in this forum, but I want to share a few websites and books, which helped me a lot.

http://www.pbinstitute.com/tips-for-...staying-sober/
This one is simple. Just basic 50 tips on how to stay sober. It helped me realize that I actually drank because I couldn't be myself and that I was bored of my life. I realized that I don't have any passion for life anymore, so I started working on it a lot. Now I travel a lot. I actually spend pretty much the same amount of money for my travels. You probably don't realize it, but booze costs a lot. Try and count how much do you spend on drinks every month. I realized that I could go on adventures at least once every three months.

http://www.positivelypresent.com/201...ggestions.html
This article inspired me to truly look for happiness, not only a temporary feeling which ended in horrible hangovers. And yes, it's mentioned that you need to tell someone from your family or friends about what's troubling you. Be honest with them. They actually care more than it seems sometimes. My mom helped me a lot in this. I even used to call in the middle of the night, because I couldn't control the craving sometimes and it made me feel depressed. But she wanted to help and actually helped more than she knows

https://www.amazon.co.uk/This-Naked-.../dp/B016JP45PU
If you like reading books, try reading "This Naked Mind" by Annie Grace. She talks a lot about the brain and alcoholism and learning to rewire our subconscious mind when it comes to drinking. Making a conscious decision not to drink and stuff like that. I found it very useful

http://healgobody.com/2016/05/25/alc...foreverreview/
Oh, this one is bliss. I recommended this book to my friend who was struggling with extensive drinking and he said that if not this book, he would probably be still stuck in drinking routine. I read it too and totally recommend it to you. It step by step walks you through the journey of sobriety. It encourages you to find the reason why did you start drinking in the first place, what can you do about it, helps you to make a detailed diet plan which will help you recover from all the damage dealt from alcohol, etc. Anyways, I'd say this is a must have if you struggle with booze and want to quit.

Let me know what worked for you as well! I am very interested to learn what keeps you motivated

And I hope that any of the suggestions above will be helpful xx
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Old 06-09-2016, 04:57 PM   #2
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Thanks for sharing. I was in complete denial when a friend took me to an AA meeting. The thing was, like you when I wanted to stop, I couldn't stay stopped. I saw the peopole in the rooms laughing and enjoying life without alcohol and I wanted what they had.

They told me to find a home group, get a sponsor, and go to meetings. I took the body and eventually the mind followed. I learned to identify instead of compare. I didn't do what a lot of them did, but I had the same feelings and we all used for the same reason(s). I prayed and asked for help and the obsession was taken from me. I heard that if you don't deal with the issues that brought you to the doors of recovery, they will take you back out. I went to counselling off and on for a few years, but found that on the whole, what I needed was the rooms of recovery. Other people had been there, and by listening to other people share, I was able to find a way that worked for me.

Not everyone in the room had what I needed or been where I had been, but I was able to find what worked for me. The main thing was not picking up that first drink. It was a spiritual solution, and by helping others I was able to get out of Self, and find a God of my understanding. I had been brought up in a strict religious background and I was angry at God and the church. I had to come to a new understanding and find a God who was loving and cared for me. I believed in God, but didn't think He believed in me because of old tapes. God was an old tape, so I had to make a new tape and build a strong relationship with the God of my understanding. I was a year sober when I went on a spiritual quest. I figured if I stopped looking for God, some day I might not find Him or worse, not go looking. My God is as He reveals Himself/Herself to me in today. I always say that when I need tender loving care, my God is a She. Every where I looked my God was there. I used people, places, and things to make me feel better. In today, I don't look outside of myself for that comfort, I go within. In today, when I am aware and open minded and willing to look, I see that my God utilizes people, places, and things to show me a better way of living.

If I just leave the top on the bottle, it is not enough. I don't want to be just sober, I want sobriety. My sponsor says that is "Soundness of mind." I can't substitute other things (when I made the decision I needed to quit, I was 41. I stopped drinking and just used prescription pills and in the end, I was using both and I was 49. I feel like my God kept me alive because He had a purpose for me, it is a wonder I was alive.), because the drug of choice is but a symptom of my disease, the problem is me.

Hopefully, you will continue to come and share your journey with us.
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Old 06-10-2016, 12:48 PM   #3
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You're an inspiration. Thank you
And I'm so glad that you managed to find a God of your understanding. I am not religious, however, I call myself a believer. I think that's it's very important to find the 'God' in every day things. And everyone have their own little worlds hidden inside of them, so everyone sees everything differently. I never liked going to the church and I never believed in that God above us who looks just like us, sits on the throne above the clouds and judges us for everyday things that are necessary for human beings to survive.
Thank you again! I hope you're having a great day xx
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Old 06-10-2016, 06:20 PM   #4
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You are an inspiration, coming to the decision that you need to quit so early in your life and following it through with action. By the time, most people acknowledge they are an alcoholic, they no longer care, and continue on drinking, only to find themselves, going deeper and deeper into their dis-ease.

I found AA to be a spiritual solution for ALL religions. It is that spiritual defense that allows me to stay clean and sober, one day at a time.

Love this little guy, he can be prickly, but he can be cute and huggable too. I saw him and thought, "Let go and let God."

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