If You Want What We Have

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"If You Want What We Have"
Sponsorship Meditations
by Joan Larkin

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Showing up for life. Being blessed with the rebirth that recovery brings. One day at a time. --Betty Ford

Newcomer

Chronologically, I'm a grown up, but in some ways I'm far behind. It feels as if I'm growing up all over again.

Sponsor

Some people in the program say that our emotional development stopped at the point when we became active in our addictions: if we abused drugs beginning at age sixteen, then we've entered recovery with the emotional development of a sixteen-year-old.
That's an oversimplification, but it points the way to a truth. Most of us enter recovery inexperienced at whatever aspects of our lives we avoided through addiction. We may feel awkward in social contexts; we may have missed out on education; we may not have found appropriate, fulfilling work. Some of us still have to learn the basics of self-care; others have numerous adult-world accomplishments, but no dependable sense of self-esteem. At times we may feel as if we're part child, part adolescent, part mature person rolled into one.
We're not stupid or shallow. We're complex people, each with our own histories, strengths, and needs. We're capable of profound change. Happily, we're not alone in our struggles to mature and become integrated individuals.

Today, I have patience with myself as I learn more about who I am and how to live.