Even More Recovery Readings and Meditations - January

[bluidkiti]

January 16

Step by Step

“Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.” – Step Four

Today, if not one of the most intimidating of the 12 Steps, one of the most gut-wrenching. In even hoping to take this one on productively and honestly, I must be certain that I have exercised Steps One, Two and Three to the best of my ability because, if I haven’t, the consequences of taking the Fourth could be devastating. In beginning my moral inventory, may I have the wisdom to ask my Higher Power for the courage, strength, honesty and objectivity to be as searching as I can. And let me remember that the Fourth asks for a moral accounting, not an immoral one, and of myself and not of another person. And making it objective is the reason I should take it with a sponsor or, at least, someone I trust unconditionally. Today, my inventory will be “searching” and, however intimidating, “fearless.” And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

BEING GRATEFUL

Two kinds of gratitude: the sudden kind we feel for what we take, the larger kind we feel for what we give.

~ E.A. Robinson ~

A wise man once said that gratitude is the “memory of the heart.” Every person in a 12 Step Group rediscovers that “memory of the heart.” The feeling of gratitude is found again in a fellowship of caring, sharing, friendship, and companionship that aims directly at recovery from whatever has possessed us. We are grateful, not only for escape from the torture of addiction, but for our freshened outlook on life as a whole.

We actually learn to be grateful for that addiction, for without it we would never have come to know the pure joy of getting clean and sober with those who understand because they are fellow sufferers wanting to stop suffering. That kind of gratitude goes beyond being thankful for the release from our addiction.

I have no reason for complaining “Why me?” for the pains unless I also exclaim “Why me!” in response to the many wonderful things that come to me in recovery.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Failure is an event, never a person.

~ William D. Brown ~

At times we have wondered if there is hope for us. But, in fact, we can all succeed in finding peace of mind. We can all achieve self-respect. The most financially successful man may be proud of his achievement but it doesn’t satisfy him. By the same token, a major failure doesn’t define a man. When we understand that our actions aren’t who we are, we will not feel trapped by a failure and we can pursue the greater prize of becoming a better man.

Today we may be troubled by a recent failure or haunted by an old one. We are embarrassed about it and feel we have lost the high regard of our friends. This failure can propel us into greater wisdom and stronger understanding of how to live a life with value.

Today I will take the spiritual leap away from basing my self-esteem on what I do toward basing it on who I am.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

We’re not here to lose our sense of humor.

~ Richie Berlin ~

Being too serious is habit-forming. However, many aspects of our lives are serious and need to be addressed. Our disease, for one, is very serious. Working the Twelve Step program to the best of our ability is serious too. So are being honest and loving with friends, taking responsibility for all of our behavior, and being willing to change. But we can get in the habit of being too serious in many areas of our lives where a lighter touch is called for.

Cultivating laughter, so it too can become habit- forming, benefits us immeasurably; however, this may not be easy. Our family of origin taught us that some things were funny and other things weren’t. If we were laughed at rather than encouraged to see the humor in situations affecting us, we may find it hard to be comfortable with anyone’s laughter. But we can work on this. We can begin by spending time with people who laugh and see the humor in situations that affect them. Our families were our earliest teachers; we can pick some new teachers now.

The more often I laugh today, the lighter my spirit will feel and the healthier my emotional life will become.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I am making changes

When I woke up this morning I wanted to pull the sheets over my head and go back to sleep— fitful sleep crowned with a nightmare. Yet what hit me harder were my unresolved problems— the ones I fell asleep worrying about last night.

But instead of going back to sleep (instead of doing the first thing that came to mind like I used to do), I sat up in bed and called my support person. I told her how worried I was, how I really wanted to go back to sleep, but how I had enough resolve to make a call. We talked a little while and sure enough, I felt better— especially when I realized that I had done something new. With that boost, I promptly got up, got dressed, and ate breakfast.

I will take a risk today and try one new approach with an ongoing problem.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

Create in me a clean heart, God; and renew a right spirit within me.

~ Psalm 51:10 ~

Recovery isn’t the end of addiction; it’s the beginning of a new life. When recovery is new to us, we may focus only on what we’ve given up — the social life, friends, and lifestyle we once had. We may look back through rose-colored glasses, remembering only the excitement and freedom of active addiction. Our new life can seem pretty tame, pretty boring. And we haven’t yet replaced our old friends with new ones, or our old lifestyle with a new one. So, looking back, we see losses instead of gains. But, bit by bit, we begin to recognize how much better this new life can be for us. We’ve lost excitement, but gained peace and serenity. We thought we were free, but now we know we were enslaved by addiction. We thought we had a spiritual life, but now realize we were spiritually bankrupt. We thought our lifestyle was good, but now know it was destructive and deadly.

But that’s in the past. Once, we were dying a day at a time. Now, we’re learning to live a day at a time.

Today help me see my old life as it really was. Help me be grateful for the changes I’ve made.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

Surely this must be an ancient proverb: If the situation is killing you, get the hell out.

~ Hugh Prather ~

Imagine you have embarked on a mountain hike. Although it is a winter day, the conditions are right for your climb. But as the hours pass, it begins to snow and the temperature drops sharply. You can barely see the path before you and have a hard time maintaining your footing. In addition, your clothing is soaked, you are starting to shiver, and your hands and feet are growing numb. What do you do?

Before you joined the program, you may have believed that your addiction was under control. No matter how bad things became, you may have told yourself or others, “I can stop any time I want.”

But now you are more aware of how addiction took away your ability to make good choices. You can choose prayer and meditation to let go of fear and resentment. You can go to meetings and draw strength from others. You can follow the Twelve Steps in all that you do. You always have the choice to turn your life over to a Higher Power, rather than stay on a dangerous path.

In all circumstances, I will remember that I have the choice to follow a path that keeps me safe and free.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

Let everyone sweep in front of his [or her] own door, and the whole world will be clean.

~ Goethe ~

Taking care of ourselves rather than trying to control others may be difficult. Our character defects may lead us to believe we should take responsibility for the actions of others. Sometimes we may feel we know how a spouse, co-worker, or friend should act. We may even go so far as to tell someone what he or she should do or do it for them.

Tonight we can reflect on our actions of today. Did we cover up another’s behavior, or tell someone what to do, or take control of something that was not our responsibility? We need to realize that taking charge of another’s life is not beneficial to anyone. Focusing on another’s life keeps us from looking at ours. Doing for others what they should be doing for themselves takes away valuable lessons for growth.

What would happen if everyone in a classroom were the teacher? Who would listen and learn? Who would mature and grow? The teacher in our lives is our Higher Power. Let us respect our instructor and let our Higher Power do the guiding while we grow.

Help me listen and learn and let go of controlling others.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Sharing our sobriety

We cannot give away something we don’t have. And since the people closest to us forced us to see our inadequacies, our inability to love, most of us resented them. Although aware of the problem, we hated having it shown to us regularly. We were empty and scared. And there was no hope in sight, so we blamed our problems on those around us.

But by coming into the program things change: First we get hope; then we get strength and experience to share with other alcoholics and nonalcoholics. We learn that in order to keep what we’ve been given so freely, we must give it away.

Do I share my sobriety with others?

Higher Power, help me be ever aware of the source of all the good things I’ve been given, and show me each day how to share them with others.

Today I will share my sobriety with

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

I am of old and young, of the foolish
as much as the wise….
And breathe the air and leave plenty after me,
And am not stuck up, and am in my place.

~ WALT WHITMAN ~

Newcomer

I’ve been told to make program calls, but I hate bothering other people, and I don’t like them bothering me. I can’t bring myself to ask people for their telephone numbers in the first place, and though a few people have offered me their numbers at meetings, I haven’t used them. How can I make phone calls to people I don’t know? Especially when I don’t really have anything to say other than that I feel terrible and don’t know why!

Sponsor

New recovery is a little bit like starting to walk after having been paralyzed. In recovery, we’re moving muscles that we haven’t used before. It’s uncomfortable. It’s work. But because we want to get better, we need to stop making excuses. I follow suggestions and use the tools of the program. I let go of my self-centeredness and see that making a program call is a gift: it offers someone else the opportunity to share his or her recovery. I recognize, too, that in the adult world, people can tell me when they aren’t available to talk; I don’t have to figure it out for them! I can be honest about where I’m at today, too—I don’t have to have my act together before I make a program call.

Today, I allow others to further their own recovery by sharing their experience, strength, and hope with me.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

We are definitely what we think—as a man thinketh, so is he. The trick for all of us is to cull out of our thinking those thoughts that are injurious to us and to retain those that are beneficial.

We conceive our own thoughts, we give them birth, we nourish and sustain them—they are our brain children. Our lives become intertwined with them, and their influence on us and our behavior is enormous.

The thoughts we have must be purely conceived, carefully trained, well disciplined and encouraged. In so doing we surround ourselves with a group of brain children whose influence on our lives brings the happy results we can hopefully expect.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) Mistakes are our teachers.

2) You have got to get out of your way.

3) If you want to get maximum attention make a big mistake.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

O God of Our Understanding

This is the dawn of a new day in the Program. I shall thank You, my Higher Power, for last night’s rest, Your gift.

Yesterday is gone, except for what I have learned from it, good or bad. Today I have the same choice, a Divine privilege which swells my heart with hope and purpose. This is my day, the purity of a new beginning.

I will receive from this day exactly what I give to it. As I do good things, good will be done to me. It is my gift to mold into something everlasting and to do those things which will affect the people around me in an ever-widening circle. The worthiness of this effort rests entirely with me.

This is my day for love, because I know that as I love, I will be loved. Hate and jealousy cannot exist in the presence of love. I will be sustained by this miracle of Your creation and this day will be lightened by my love for others and especially love for my fellow travelers in the Program.

Today I will do my best without thought of failures of the past or anxieties for the future. When this day is ended, I will have no regrets. On retiring I shall thank You, my Higher Power, for this wonderful day.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

GOD is SOUL

The fifth main aspect of God is Soul. Soul is that aspect of God by virtue of which He is able to individualize Himself. The word individual means “undivided.” Most people seem to think it suggests separateness but actually individual means undivided, and God has the power of individualizing Himself without, so to speak, breaking Himself into parts.

You are really an individualization of God. Only God can individualize Himself in an infinite number of units of consciousness, and yet not be in any way separate, because God is spirit. Matter cannot be individualized. It can only be divided. So your real self, the Christ within, the spiritual man, the I Am, or the divine spark, as it is variously called, is an individualization of God. You are the presence of God at the point where you are.

Man may very well be compared to an electric light bulb. The electric current is present in all parts of the circuit, but it shines forth, or one might say, figuratively, becomes self-conscious, in the bulb. So divine Mind becomes self-conscious in you.

Jesus answered them, Is it not written in your law, I said, Ye are gods? (John 10:34).

When you are called upon to perform some task or undertake some responsibility that seems too great for you, realize that you are one with God and the task will become “our business” instead of “my business”.

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Don’t Shoot the Screen

It’s hard to defeat an enemy who has an outpost in your own head.

~ Sally Compton ~

When motion pictures became popular, a group of cowboys went into a Montana town to watch their first movie. Upon viewing a scene in which a band of Indians was kidnaping a young pioneer woman, a cowboy in the back of the theater stood up and furiously fired a barrel of bullets at the screen. The film stopped, the lights came on, and the audience laughed to behold a blank screen with six bullet holes in it.

We are equally fooled if we attack the movie of our life playing on the screen of our mind. If you fight, hurt, or retaliate against those who do not support or agree with you, you are wasting bullets. Your efforts to prove yourself to others are as useless as shooting the screen.

We “hire” everyone we meet to represent something we believe about ourselves or our world. We can thank those who challenge us, for they help us discover the self-diminutive beliefs lodged below the surface of our conscious awareness. The way to transform our world is not to struggle to manipulate people or events, but to upgrade our thoughts and our consciousness so we attract people and events that demonstrate love rather than fear.

If you know your worth, you do not need anyone else to confirm it, and if you do not recognize your value, you will not gain it by getting others to approve. If you don’t like the movie you are watching, don’t bother shooting the screen; instead, change the movie or better yet, turn on the light.

Help me remember that my inner world is where real change occurs. Show me the truth about myself, that I may manifest love in my relationships.

My world reflects the true beauty within me.