QUESTIONS???

[MajestyJo]

This leaves only one day-today. Anyone can fight the battles of just one day. It is only when you and I add the burden of those two awful eternities, yesterday and tomorrow that we break down. It is not the experience of today that drives us mad. It is the remorse or bitterness for something, which happened yesterday, or the dread of what tomorrow may bring. Let us therefore do our best to live but one day at a time. Am I living one day at a time?

- Twenty-Four Hours a Day

My life is so much in today that things seem to slip away and time just disappears. I must admit to wanting Saturday to be here a couple of times this week. Each time it came to mind though, I brought myself back in the moment reminding myself, it is just today.

One day's thoughts and actions. One day's experiences, adventures, and disappointments. When we live in today, the pictures isn't so overwhelming. When I try to bring in yesterday and tomorrow, today becomes unmanageable.

Give God the gift of a thankful heart.

Don't think I have read those line before, if so, it was a long time ago. Similiar words and meanings but just not put that way. That is my gift today that I will take with me.

I am so grateful for recovery. It has given me so much. The greatest gift has been myself. Without sobriety, I would be dead. There wasn't much 'me' left and recovery has put me back together again, one day at a time.

God and I are still working on it!

http://www.hazeldenbettyford.org/rec...ur-hours-a-day

[MajestyJo]

DAILY OM

Exploring An Alternate Universe
What Makes People Tick?

All people have their own way of being in the world. It is easiest to comprehend this basic yet profound fact when we consider that every human being on the planet occupies a distinct role in the universe. We grow up in different environments, affected by a unique range of influences. The preferences, values, and beliefs we embrace are frequently related intimately to our origins. And the need to individualize our experiences is instinctive, as doing so enables us to cope when we must face challenges on our own. Consequently, each of us has developed a perspective that is uniquely ours. Interacting peacefully and constructively with people from all walks of life is a matter of first understanding where they are coming from. Then we can adjust our expectations so that we avoid making undue assumptions about what they are about.

In the face of emerging interpersonal conflict, it is easy to assume that others are being difficult, unreasonable, or stubborn. We are apt to grow frustrated when someone in our environment does not share our opinions or feel compelled to support us in our endeavors. It is likely that the individual or individuals before us may simply possess differing notions with regard to what is and what is not important in this life. We can ease the tension that exists between us by reaffirming our belief in the fundamental right of all beings to determine their own destinies. To foster a harmonious relationship, we need to do our best to relate to the unique universes they inhabit. And as we discover what makes them tick, our ability to find a mode of interaction that is pleasing to both of us is enhanced.

When there are barriers keeping you from connecting with someone else, think of questions you can ask them to gain a more thorough understanding of their point of view. You may discover that in addition to the differences in perspective dividing you, they are subject to insecurities and other personal issues that influence their way of seeing the world. It is likely that you will never fully grasp the myriad complexities embodied by humanity, but you can go a long way toward encouraging mutually satisfying relations by reaching out to others in the spirit of sympathetic comprehension.

What do you think?

One of the gifts of recovery was being able to see both sides of the street. Understanding were people came from, helped me to be more accepting.

[MajestyJo]

It doesn't really matter what you desire to achieve. The thing that truly makes a difference is what you're willing to do to reach that desired achievement. Your willingness to do what is necessary makes the critical difference between merely wishing and actually making it happen. The strength of your desire matters only to the degree that it motivates you to take action.
If every wish was immediately and completely fulfilled, with no effort whatsoever, imagine how tiresome that would soon become. Think of how completely unfulfilling such a life would be.

The real value of any achievement depends on the challenges that must be overcome to reach that achievement. To shortcut the process, even if it was possible, would leave you feeling empty and cheated.

What a blessing it is that achievement requires effort, and that significant achievement requires significant, dedicated effort. The necessity of making it happen is what brings the possibility of making it great, and valuable, and truly magnificent.

-- Ralph Marston

This was written by an "Earthling" as far as I know but he captures the spirit of the program very well.

Step One:

Powerless seems like such a negative word, yet on the whole, it is one of the most powerful and positive places we can be.

When we admit we are powerless over people, places and things, then we are empowered to make some changes in our lives.

When we can see that we can't control another person's thought, actions, feelings; a vehicles preformance, reliability, or its parts; a place where we always go to feel safe may not always be there, be available, because it can be shut down, shut up, closed, etc.

When I drank, I couldn't guarantee my actions, whether I would go home for supper let alone be able to cook it. A lot of it was about. who came into the Legion, if I found a dart partner, a cribbage game, or the pleasure of someone's company, especially if they were buying me drinks or I was playing for drinks. So even when it came to my alcoholism, I am powerless over people, places and things.

When I surrender and ask the God of my understanding for help, He empowers me to do what I need to do for myself. I no longer have to go to people, places and things to fulfill my need. He is the Great Supplier, and He in today, often utilizes people, places and things to show me a better way of living.

ARE YOU AN ALOCHOLIC?

The Five stages of drunkenness

Stage 1 - SMART- This is when you suddenly become an expert on every subject in the known Universe. You know you know everything and want to pass on your knowledge to anyone who will listen. At this stage you are always RIGHT. And of course the person you are talking to is very WRONG. This makes for an interesting argument when both parties are SMART.

Stage 2 - GOOD LOOKING- This is when you realize that you are the BEST LOOKING person in the entire bar and that people fancy you. You can go up to a perfect stranger knowing they fancy you and really want to talk to you. Bear in mind that you are still SMART, so you can talk to this person about any subject under the sun.


Stage 3 - RICH- This is when you suddenly become the richest person in the world. You can buy drinks for the entire bar because you have an armoured truck full of money parked behind the bar. You can also make bets at this stage, because of course, you are still SMART, so naturally you win all your bets. It doesn't matter how much you bet 'cos you are RICH. You will also buy drinks for everyone that you fancy, because now you are the BEST LOOKING person in the world.

Stage 4 - BULLET PROOF- You are now ready to pick fights with anyone and everyone especially those with whom you have been betting or arguing. This is because nothing can hurt you. At this point you can also go up to the partners of the people who you fancy and challenge to a battle of wits or money. You have no fear of losing this battle because you are SMART, you are RICH and hell, you're BETTER LOOKING than they are anyway!

Stage 5 - INVISIBLE- This is the Final Stage of Drunkenness.
At this point you can do anything because NO ONE CAN SEE YOU. You dance on a table to impress the people who you fancy because the rest of the people in the room cannot see you. You are also invisible to the person who wants to fight you. You can walk through the street singing at the top of your lungs because no one can see or hear you and because you're still SMART you know all the words.

I just finished reading Bill W's autobiography. My first 40 Years. Towards the very end in Towns Hospital Ebby gave him a book titled " The Varieties of Religious Experience " by William James. He was an intellectual, called by some the father of modern psychology. Bill began to see that all the experiences cited had certain common denominators, despite the ways they manifested themselves. The first common denominatoe was calamity. Nearly every recipient described had met utter defeat in some controlling area of life. Every resource of courage, understanding, and will had failed. the next condition was the admission from the very dpths of being that defeat was utter and absolute. the third condition was an appeal to a higher power for help. It did not matter what form or channel this higher power was, more importantly seemed the appeal. Utter defeat, the complete mission of helplessness and the appeal. These were the essential things. The bearer of this message was Ebby with whom Bill shared the common experience of alcoholism and who'd related this same form of transformation on a more gradual basis than Bill had just experienced himself.

Received from a good friend in NA.

[MajestyJo]

Why don't I leave?

This is probably one of the easiest questions for me to came along in a while.

Simple I don't leave because I love him.

Yes he may be an addict and had his problems but he is trying very hard to recover.

But being an addict is not the only thing he is.

He is strong.
He is handsome (great penetrating hazel eyes to die for)
He is a good provider.
He is a good father.
He is a good husband & lover.
He is a confidant.
He gives comfort.
He will go out of his way for me.
He is complex and thought provoking.
He has his quirks , just as I have mine.
He accepts me for who I am.
He is undemanding of me.
He loves me right back.

But the main reason I stay he is my friend and my soulmate, and I love him.

This is a post by a friend in response to a newcomer who asked the question "Why can't I leave him." I didn't leave because I thought my son needed a father. I later came to realize my son didn't like him much and grew to hate him as my ex-husband's disease escalated into abuse. Most times it was directed at me, but it got to a stage there was going to be a fist-a-cuff and that wasn't an option, so I kicked him out of the apartment. He complained when I spent money on food, it was beer money. When he left I had 50 cents in my purse and a half jar of peanut butter. There never seemed to be a right time to ask him to leave, so I did it and trust God to provide. I shared with my friend who was a bartender at the Royal Canadian Legion. Her husband who was past-president of the Legion came to me and gave me a $50. cheque to see me through until I could get hold of Mother's Allowance on Monday. I tried to be a buffer between him and my son. My son had a lot of anger as a result of that marriage that last 7 years.

I had a lot of anger as a result of the marriage too, a lot of mental and emotional abuse and then it became physical. No woman should stay in that kind of relationship, you deserve better. He killed all the love I had for him. The same thing happened with my first marriage, along with the fact that he was running around with other women and then felt the need to introduce me to them. He was not their the night our son was born, and he moved out when our son was two months old to move in with one of his women. I know that I loved him but the pain was too much and had to do a lot of healing by applying the Steps, then at 15 years sober, I went to sexual assault counselling. My first husband was the first person to rape me. I felt that it was my fault because I wasn't a good wife or woman. I didn't know I had the right to say no to my husband. It was a role I had to play. So many old tapes got in the way, and thanks to the program, I was able to heal and find myself.

[MajestyJo]

Don't intellectualize, don't question how it works. Just know it does and don't question it with Who, Why, and Wheres?

Don't intellectualize, just accept. The program works if you work for it.

Take the body and the mind will follow!

When I find myself 'wanting' something, I need to examine 'Why' and ask myself if it is self-will or my God's Will. My God meets my needs, He/She even supplies my wants and desires if they are for my Romper Room. When I get needy I get greedy and childish and want what is good for me, without thought of anyone else.

Will - Step 3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.

Step 11. Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.

Willing - Willing to believe in a Power greater than myself. BB, p. 12

If you have decided you want what we have and are willing to go to any length to get it -- then you are ready to take certain steps. BB, p. 58

Willing to grow along spiritual lines. BB, p. 60

Willing to make amends. BB, p. 76

Willing to place spiritual growth first. 12x12, p. 114

Willing to take advice and accept direction. 12x12, p. 59

It works, if I work for it. So many people say, "They are only suggestions." Well there are some darn well betters or you will pick up, which can be anything other than your drug of choice and you feel like there is nothing wrong because it isn't your drug of choice.

The 12 Steps are applicable to all parts of my life. In order to recovery, I had to look at my pill addiction, my alcoholism, my codependency, my relationships, my eating disorder, and my addiction to busy and the computer.

I had to look at my life and see how I was looking outside of myself to make me feel better. Recovery is an inside job. For so many years, I questioned myself. I had to go within and find myself. I had to go within and work on what was there, rather than what I thought was there or wanted to be there.

I had to work on my character defects, behaviors and habits, as well as heal from my addiction(s). It was about getting honest about my dis-ease, opening my mind to new things, and willing to do what ever it takes to maintain my sobriety.

The program works if you work it.

[MajestyJo]

The program works if you work for it. The program works if you work for the program. Service has always been a big part of my recovery,

One of my medication cards yesterday:

New Beginnings:- A clear slate is now encounter presented to you as you now encounter fresh opportunities and novel experiences.

Sometimes we cling to old routines because they are familiar. I only get out of a day what I put into it.

Are you willing to put your life into the Care of God?

[MajestyJo]

0nce Y0u L0se Sum0ne... ♥

It's Never The Exactly The Same Pers0n Who Comes Back....! :'(

SMS2 Text


I felt so different from the person that came through the doors of recovery, I didn't think anyone would recognize me. A member of my group said, 'Just because you change the color of your hair doesn't mean I can't recognize you. Another person said, "Do you ever keep track of the number of times yo u change your hair style and color."

I was searching for me and I recognize that I was focusing on the outside. I came into the program a red head, went back to my original color, a brunette and my son suggested I go blonde.

I did not recognize myself, I got lost along the way. I had to get out of the way, work the program, and allow the changes to happen. I was generally the last to notice.

They say fake it until you make it. Not one of my favourite sayings, but in truth it does work. I kept coming and didn't have to come back.

[MajestyJo]

Bible Verses About Trusting God - Read scriptures about the importance of believing in and trusting God even though we can not see him. Read biblical answers to questions about God, like "who is God?", "what is God really like?", "why can't we see God?" and many more.

Use our Bible verses by topic page to quickly find scriptures about popular topics.


1 Peter 2:1-5
Therefore, rid yourselves of all malice and all deceit, hypocrisy, envy, and slander of every kind. Like newborn babies, crave pure spiritual milk, so that by it you may grow up in your salvation, now that you have tasted that the Lord is good. As you come to him, the living Stone--rejected by men but chosen by God and precious to him-- you also, like living stones, are being built into a spiritual house to be a holy priesthood, offering spiritual sacrifices acceptable to God through Jesus Christ.

Isaiah 41:10
So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

Jeremiah 17:5
This is what the LORD says: "Cursed is the one who trusts in man, who depends on flesh for his strength and whose heart turns away from the LORD.


The God of your understanding is with you always, if you question your life, then you are questioning your God. Faith opens the door.

[MajestyJo]

What Are the Symptoms of Alcohol Abuse?

The following symptoms are associated with alcohol abuse:

Temporary blackouts or memory loss.
Recurrent arguments or fights with family members or friends as well as irritability, depression, or mood swings.
Continuing use of alcohol to relax, to cheer up, to sleep, to deal with problems, or to feel "normal."
Headache, anxiety, insomnia, nausea, or other unpleasant symptoms when you stop drinking.
Flushed skin and broken capillaries on the face; a husky voice; trembling hands; bloody or black/tarry stools or vomitingblood; chronic diarrhea; and drinking alone, in the mornings, or in secret; these symptoms are specifically associated with alcoholism.

Keep in mind that alcohol abuse is different from alcohol dependence.

With abuse, a person uses alcohol in excess but may not have regular cravings, a need to use daily, or withdrawal symptoms during sudden stoppage. The person may often have heavy alcohol binge episodes separated by periods of not drinking.
If a person is dependent on alcohol, he or she needs to drink regularly or even daily and drink more and more to get the same effects. The person also experiences withdrawal symptoms if he or she stops drinking and wants to quit drinking alcohol but can't.

Call Your Doctor About Alcohol Dependence If:

You have any of the symptoms listed in the description section and are unable to stop drinking on your own. You need medical intervention to treat alcoholism. You may also be susceptible to ailments such as alcoholic hepatitis, ulcers, cirrhosis, and heart disease.
You drink regularly and experience chronic or periodic depression. You may be at risk of suicide.
You have tried to stop drinking and experienced withdrawal symptoms such as headache, anxiety, insomnia, nausea, or delirium tremens (DTs). You need medical attention by a doctor or a treatment center.

Ask yourself, "Do I have a problem?"

C -- You tried but failed to Cut down your drinking
A -- You are Annoyed by criticism from others about drinking
G -- You feel Guilt about consequences of drinking (such as loss of job or relationship)
E -- You've needed a drink or Eye-opener to steady your nerves or treat a hangover

If you answered "yes" to two or more of these questions, you could have a problem with alcohol.

Reviewed by: Jennifer Robinson, MD on March 01, 2015.

[MajestyJo]

Balance Within

So much of the time, I believe,
we have much more room for activity and doing in our lives,
but in some way convince ourselves we're just too busy.
Too busy to talk with a friend,
too busy to plant flowers,
too busy to try something that we've always wanted to do.
The list goes on and on.

But the truth is that when we are imbalanced
by not honoring what is best for us as individuals,
even the most sedentary lifestyle can seem stressful.
It doesn't have to be that way though.
At this time of new beginnings,
perhaps it is time to have a renewed look at your dreams and aspirations.

Determine what you wish to do,
and what elements may be missing in your life
that would give you the sense of balance and fullness once enjoyed.
It is these things,
sometimes very small,
that will give you the sense of happiness if any can.
Choose well to know your dreams!

unknown

Do you have balance in your life? It has always been a challenge for me.

[MajestyJo]

How are you sabotaging yourself?

"If you play it safe in life you've decided that you don't want to grow any more."

-- Shirley Hufstedler

How are you sabotaging your potential for change?

We unconsciously use defence mechanisms to shield us from situations we perceive to be scary or painful. A part of you may want to grow and change, but another part may be resisting because change always moves you into new territory in your thinking and emotions.

If you find you are getting anxious, fearful, angry, frustrated, dismissive or unmotivated, then defence mechanisms are at work. Watch for them and know them to be signs of fear that wants to hold you back. Then courageously move through them.

"I have never been contained except I made the prison."

-- Mary Evans

From Higher Awareness - used with permission

Especially love the last quote. I was a prisoner of my own mind. As I told the girls when I volunteered to do meetings for AA, NA, and Al-Anon and do one on ones for AA and NA, "I didn't need iron bars, I was in my own self-imposed prison."

Just like this Santa, going no where fast!

Are you your own worst enemy?

[MajestyJo]

It is a long-time dream which has finally come true. As I learn, I hope to enhance it, but for the moment, the basics are there.

www.harmonyandpeace.i8.com/

A woman in Michigan helped me build this several years ago, when I was clueless about sites and the internet, and she guided me by talking to me on Instant Messenger on MSN. My old sites that were on MSN and Multiply are all gone. I am still clueless and don't know how to add to the site or to change anything that is there.

Do you have peace and harmony in your life?

[MajestyJo]

May 2004

This reminds me of the phrase, “Are you an alcoholic?” “I think I might be just a little bit.” The both statements are the same as saying I think I am a little bit pregnant. Either you are or you are not. I had to find my own truth, and although I was in denial, there was something within me that kept me coming to the rooms of recovery for two years until I had reach total acceptance, and I know it wasn’t me.

When I looked back over my life, some force was working in my life keeping me alive and to the doors of recovery, because I qualified twenty years before I got here. Some are sicker than others. When I took an honest look at my life I realized God didn’t go away, I did!

God works in my life today. He utilizes people, places and things to show me a better way of living and to help me in my journey.

God still is in my life. With the pain and health issues in my life today, I would have been long gone if it wasn't for God in my life. I see so many people with the same issues who are on heavy medication and totally isolated and into self and I want to tell them, get a 12 Step Program. You know me you qualify for Al-Anon, even if you feel you don't qualify as an alcoholic or an addict.

I identified so much with ACoA (Adult Children of Alcoholics), and I was so grateful that I went to AA first, or I might have died in my disease because of my denial.

[MajestyJo]

How are you feeling today?

F.I.N.E. Frustrated, Insecure, Neurotic, and Emotional. The one I like is "...and enjoying it."

Getting in touch with my emotions was difficult. I had shoved them down all of my life. I hadn't felt them, so how could I identify them. I had trouble putting a name on them. What I thought was anger, often turned out to be resentment, hurt, rejection, abandonment, and a lot of other things that my sponsor help me to identify. They said I had to feel them in order to let me go, so I found that I had to pray for the willingness to be willing to not stuff my feelings with other substances than my drug(s) of choice, people, places, and things.

[MajestyJo]

Let me tell you my story about the two doors. I think I posted this on the AEB site so some of you may have seen it before.

One door with a room full of CHIT behind it and all you will find in this room is CHIT. If you put your hands in it, even dig right up to your elbows, jump right into it or even wallow in it all you will ever find is CHIT Next to the door there are 12 steps and you can take the 12 steps and leave the CHIT behind.

There is a new door with many gifts called sobriety. Anytime you want to, you can go down the stairs and you can wallow in the CHIT; But you can always take the steps again and get out of the CHIT. In the new room there are many gifts for having worked the steps; They are yours for the taking as long as you remember to use the steps.

Firefly

=======================================

There was a little boy who was the worlds greatest optimist. He could find the good in anyone and anything. Not wanting him to be hurt as he got older, his parents thought they would teach him a life lesson. It was his birthday and they got a whole truck load of horse manure and dumped it into his room.
When they opened the door for him, he jumped right in digging with both hands. When they asked him what he was doing, he said, "With all this manure, I know there has to be a pony in here somewhere."
We can choose to see the dark side, or we can choose to see the light side. We can choose to be happy, or we can choose to be miserable.

Wolf

=======================================

People say to me, well I have done the steps!

I remember asking "What happens when I get to Step Twelve?" I was told, "Start again at Step One! You should have grown as a result of working the steps, so you will have a new perception of yourself and your life, so if you want to keep growing and changing, keep working the step!"

Self-honesty doesn't happen overnight, and it is only through working the steps that I was able to get "REAL" and remove the layers that block my vision and kept me in a world of illusion and denial.

This is just as true today as when I posted this on another site and as it was in early recovery. Pain has always been a big trigger for me. I suffer from chronic pain all the time as a result of my five types of arthritis. Pain is why I used in the first place. At first it was emotional pain, then it became mental, then physical.



Thank God the program still works.