Even More Recovery Readings and Meditations - February

[bluidkiti]

February 10

Step by Step

Today, review Step 10, the follow-up and maintenance of the Fourth Step of “moral inventory” infamy, with two purposes in mind: to detect any pending resurgence of any character defects that might derail my recovery, and to measure if I am proceeding with the program’s integrity. In working for and progressing toward sobriety and maximum benefits, I must also be reminded that the program expects and deserves something from me in return: openness, honesty, humility, gratitude, and ethical 12th-stepping. Today, my 10th Step is designed to determine if I am working with gratitude and respect of the program’s entire steps and traditions and, in return, that I am respecting the program through honesty, integrity and loyalty. And our common journey continues. Step by step. – Chris M.

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~ EASY DOES IT ~ (A Book of Daily 12 Step Meditations) ~

ROSE GARDENS

Give me roses to remember in the shadow of December.

~ Margaret L. Woods ~

When we began recovery, nobody promised us a rose garden. Yet each day in recovery we find that we do have a rose garden full of cherished beauty.

No flower garden will ever produce lovely blooms for us unless we work constantly at weeding, hoeing, mulching, fertilizing, pruning dead wood, watering and spraying for plant enemies. How much spiritual growth our garden brings us depends on the amount of spade work we do.

The gifts of the Program are realized when we put our best efforts to work. This way of life is based on our positive action.

I must make my life like rich soil so that what is planted within me will be nourished and grow.

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~ WISDOM TO KNOW ~ (More Daily Meditations For Men) ~

Real friends are those who, when you’ve made a fool of yourself, don’t feel that you’ve done a permanent job.

~ Erwin T. Randall ~

Friendship is one of the most important elements in a rich and joyful life. Good mental health requires that we not walk through life without one or two good friends. Many of us have been very lonely. We built invisible shields around ourselves that protected us from letting others know what we were thinking or doing, but they also separated us from the comfortable closeness of good friends. Many of us have a deep and abiding anxiety about being vulnerable to anyone, and many of us are especially guarded about getting close to other men.

In our growth as men, we are abandoning notions of perfection in ourselves and in others. We don’t expect perfection, and we can expect our friends to cut us some slack when they see our mistakes and our weaknesses. True friends see in each other a complex weaving of many qualities, many experiences, and a mixture of more and less attractive qualities.

Today I will give my friendships the primary place they deserve.

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~ A WOMAN’S SPIRIT ~ (More Meditations For Women) ~

Loving means moving my ego aside and letting my Higher Power send energy through me to others.

~ Jane Nakken ~

We commonly hear in Twelve Step meetings that ego is the culprit in our experiences, but what does that mean? Isn’t having a healthy self-image the same as having a strong ego? Not exactly; a strong ego is not necessarily a healthy one. But how can we tell the difference?

Perhaps the best way is to look at our behavior. If we are trying to control others against their will, the unhealthy dimension of our ego has taken over. Backing off, letting that person be directed by a Higher Power rather than by us, enhances the good feelings we have of ourselves. That’s how a healthy self-image is developed.

I will love the people in my life today. They are here with me now because that is God’s assignment for me.

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~ TODAY I WILL DO ONE THING ~ (Daily Readings for Awareness and Hope) ~

I can get by with less money

Recovering from two chronic illnesses costs money. And these days I have little—all I can manage is a part-time job. Sometimes it’s hard to pay the bills. I miss what extra money I used to have. I can’t have fun the way I used to.

On the other hand, does that mean I can’t have any fun at all? In the Sunday paper I noticed a list of free events for “folks on a budget” (that’s me—and apparently I’m not alone!). True, money is important, but maybe I don’t have to let it be so important. Maybe this is a chance for me to change how I think about money.

I will make a note of two free things I like to do, or two free places I like to go, and tack the note on my bulletin board.

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~ BODY, MIND, AND SPIRIT ~ (Inspiration and Support for Recovery) ~

The more balanced our lives, the more serene we feel.

~ Ann Smith ~

Recovery is a balancing act. As we begin to grow and change, we find that balance is a key opening the door to serenity. In our old using days, we lived on the edge and had become disaster experts. Major areas of our lives seemed to be in constant flux. We had disturbed relationships, little or no spirituality, poor emotional and physical health, and trouble with money.

Today our world is changing. We are coming to value and cherish our serenity and honesty. When one of our major life areas is out of balance, we find that we pay attention. We’re beginning to see patterns and, through these patterns, a new hope for real, lasting change. By the grace of God, we seem to be losing our high tolerance for confusion and uncertainty. Every new day, our newfound knowledge about ourselves and our spiritual guidance are working together to change our lives.

Today help me find the middle ground and take the time I need to find my balance.

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~ MORNING LIGHT ~ (Meditations to Begin Your Day) ~

If you’re feeling miserable, force yourself to smile broadly, holding your goofy grin at least ten seconds. When you relax your face, you’ll actually feel happier.

~ Sandra Stier ~

It has been said that humor may be hazardous to your illness. Research shows that those who are seriously ill can use humor and laughter to help turn the tide of their illness. Yet when you are in pain, depressed, or stressed, the last thing you may want to do is smile.

A smile can open up a positive flow of energy, while laughter can provide a positive balance to negative feelings. They can be as beneficial to your body as aerobic exercise and as helpful to your mind as a peaceful meditation.

When you laugh at your problems and see humor in challenging situations, you open yourself to greater capabilities for handling whatever comes your way. A smile or a laugh can take you away from your problems and troubles—if only for a few moments—and provide you with the ability to see things with different eyes and a fresh perspective. You may discover that something you were obsessing about is really quite inconsequential, and something that caused you great upset is really not as terrible as you thought.

Today I will remember that it is okay to laugh through my tears and smile through my sadness.

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~ NIGHT LIGHT ~ (A Book Of Nighttime Meditations) ~

When folks have allotted themselves a task and work together in unison, they escape unhappiness.

~ Emile Zola ~

We may have been loners in the past, preferring solitude to the company of others. We may have spent time as children buried in books instead of outside playing with other children. We may have endured high school without lots of dates. We may now feel more comfortable with people in one-on-one situations rather than in large groups.

A meeting is an ideal place to learn how to interact with others. We don’t have to act a certain way or hide our feelings, because our group will understand us no matter what. We can give as much as we choose and they will neither harm us, nor ask for more.

By attending meetings regularly, we’ll learn they exist because people are working together in unison. Someone “opens up,” others make coffee, one will chair and one will speak, and some will clean up at the end. We can learn that the strength of our group lies in the ability of each member to do what is comfortable for him or her. Such coexistence can help us learn we can gather strength from numbers.

I can do something to add to the strength of the group.

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~ DAY BY DAY ~ (Daily Meditations for Recovering Addicts) ~

Praying for things

It seems that in our selfishness we’re always praying for the things that we want and not the things we need. If we pray for and receive luxury sexual fulfillment, or an easy life, what do we gain? Certainly not strength, wisdom, and love.

To gain strength we must carry burdens; to gain wisdom we must become honest with ourselves; and to gain love we must become loving. These virtues are not accomplished through material things, sex, or a soft life.

Am I praying for the right things?

Higher Power, help me pray for the right things and to accept that you will give me what I need and not necessarily what I want.

Today I will pray for

God help me to stay clean and sober today!

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~ IF YOU WANT WHAT WE HAVE ~ (Sponsorship Meditations) ~

As we advance in life, we learn the limits of our abilities.

~ JAMES FROUDE ~

Newcomer

If I hear “This is a ‘we’ program” one more time, I’ll get sick. I don’t like groups, I don’t like the idea of depending on this program, and I don’t like the idea of depending on a Higher Power to take care of me. I’ve always been a strong person. I cherish my independence.

Sponsor

Let’s take a look at some different kinds of dependency. Of course, there are dependencies that aren’t appropriate; they keep us from growing, just as our addictions did. For example, a parent’s continuing financial support of a grown child who is capable of earning a living on his or her own enables a mutual dependency that’s probably unhealthy for both parties.

There are other kinds of dependency that most of us accept without hesitation. When we strike a match, we expect a flame; when we put seeds into the earth, we trust that plants will grow. Dependency isn’t enslavement. If we’re diabetic and depend on daily insulin to regulate our blood sugar level, we don’t regard ourselves as weak. We’re grateful that the means exist to keep our disease in check. The same is true of Twelve Step programs for those of us who acknowledge our addictions. We can count on these meetings being here when we need them. We can count on the fact that if we follow the program, we will not have to depend on addictive substances and behaviors.

Today, my willingness to depend on this program gives me freedom.

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~ THE EYE OPENER ~

We should choose to want less of material things and more of substantial values.

Happiness comes not from possessions but from an ability to possess the things that assure happiness. Live up to the Twelve Steps as best you can and you will find your sense of values will change and that real, lasting happiness is within your reach.

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~ WALK SOFTLY AND CARRY A BIG BOOK ~ (Official & Unofficial Sloganeering From the 12 Step Programs) ~

1) Denial, is not just a river in Egypt.

2) Grateful addicts don’t drink and drug and drinking and drugging addicts aren’t grateful.

3) We must learn from the mistakes of others because we won’t live long enough to make them all ourselves.

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~ The 12 STEP PRAYER BOOK ~ (A Collection of Favorite 12 Step Prayers and Inspirational Readings) ~

Am I Willing?

Dear Higher Power, help me:

To forget what I have done for other people, and to remember what other people have done for me.

To ignore what the world owes me, and to think what I owe the world.

To put my rights in the background, and my duties in the middle distance, and my chances to do a little more than my duty in the foreground.

To see that my fellow members are just as real as I am, and to try to look behind their faces to their hearts, as hungry for joy as mine is.

To own that probably the only good reason for my existence is not what I can get out of life, but what I can give to life.

To close my book of complaints against the management of the universe and look for a place where I can sow a few seeds of happiness—am I willing to do these things even for a day?

Then I have a good chance of staying with the Program.

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~ AROUND THE YEAR WITH EMMET FOX ~ (A Book of Daily Readings) ~

THE GIVER OF OUR BREAD

People think of their supply as coming from certain investments, or from a business, or from an employer, perhaps; whereas these are merely the channels through which it comes, God being the Source. A particular channel is likely to change, because change is the cosmic law for manifestation. Stagnation is really death; but as long as you realize that the Source of your supply is the one unchangeable Spirit, all is well. The fading out of one channel will be but the signal for the opening of another.

In its inner and most important meaning, our daily bread signifies the realization of the Presence of God—an actual sense that God exist not merely in a nominal way, but as the great reality; we can rely upon Him to supply all that we need to have; teach us all the we need to know; and guide our steps so that we shall not make mistakes. This is Emanuel, or God with us.

But my God shall supply all you need . . . (Phillipians 4:19).

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~ A DEEP BREATH OF LIFE ~ (365 Daily Inspirations for Heart-Centered Living) ~

Pass the Salt

Respect the past in the full measure of its desserts, but do not make the mistake of confusing it with the present, or seek in it the ideals of the future.

~ Jose Ingenieros ~

As I unpacked my suitcase at a hotel, I discovered that I had left two of my favorite articles of clothing hanging in a closet at another hotel 2,000 miles away. As I picked up the phone to call the hotel to see if the items had turned up in Lost and Found, I noticed that I was hesitating. I realized I didn’t want to call because I didn’t really want to retrieve the items. One was a sweatshirt given to me years ago, and another was a casual shirt I have customarily worn on plane flights. Both felt very old, laden with memories and history I no longer wanted to carry with me. I put down the phone and smiled. I was done with the shirts. They did not belong to me now, and I would not call them back to me.

Every time we haul an old, painful memory into the now, we are phoning a distant hotel and asking for our tattered garments to be forwarded to our new abode. Messengers will do so if we ask. Then we wonder why our present looks like our past. But we are under no obligation to replay old scenes; all of life is optional, including reliving ancient pain. Every day we are free to choose anew. If today looks gruesomely like yesterday, and your life is a long replay of Groundhog Day, do not blame karma, the environment, or other people. Instead, look at the choices you are making today.

The Bible tells how, as Sodom was being destroyed, God told Lot and his family not to look back. Lot’s wife disobeyed, and she was turned into a pillar of salt. The story is a metaphor. When we clutch at the old after it no longer serves us, we become petrified. Salt is a preservative. We cannot preserve the past; we must release it to make way for a fresh new future.

I return my past to You, and allow You to make me new.

I release the past and invite love to meet me in the present.