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Humor "We Are Not A Glum Lot." Share Articles, Humor, Inspirations, Jokes, News, Poems, Quotes, Writings, etc. Here. Keep It Clean Please.

 
 
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Old 10-29-2017, 09:51 AM   #1
bluidkiti
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Default Comebacks To Unsolicited Sales Callers

Comebacks To Unsolicited Sales Callers

Here are some suggested comebacks to unsolicited, persistent telephone sales callers:

~ "I'm sorry, but I'm really busy right now. Give me your
home number and I'll call you back later tonight."

~ In the middle of the caller's memorized sales pitch,
interrupt with: "What causes a hiccup?"

~ "Shhh. Wait a minute. I'm here robbing the house. Whoa! I
think the owners just got home. Can you hold?"

~ When someone asks whether a spouse is at home: "Yes, but I
never allow him/her to talk to strangers."

~ When someone asks how you are: "Well, I'm having an
existential crisis at the moment. Let me explain . . ."

~ "You want to sell me insurance? I've been trying to get
insurance for years, but nobody will sell me any!"

~ Another response to rug-cleaners or any person offering
home services: (Break into tears and say) "Is this some kind
of joke? My house burned down last night! We lost
everything!"

~ To a phone company solicitor: "That sounds GREAT! Wait,
can you hold for a minute?" (Leave the phone off the hook
until he/she hangs up.)

~ Use your touch-tone phone to annoy the caller by playing
"Mary Had a Little Lamb":
6-5-4-5
6-6-6
5-5-5
6-6-6.
6-5-4-5
6-6-6-6
5-5-6-5
4-4-4-4-4-4-4-4-4-4-4-4-4-4
__________________
"No matter what you have done up to this moment, you get 24 brand-new hours to spend every single day." --Brian Tracy
AA gives us an opportunity to recreate ourselves, with God's help, one day at a time. --Rufus K.
When you get to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on. --Franklin D. Roosevelt
We stay sober and clean together - one day at a time!
God says that each of us is worth loving.
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