Wisdom For Today - October

[bluidkiti]

October 6

Wisdom for Today

On a dark and gloomy night, the lights of our old haunts can look very inviting. It is easy to get caught up in the memories of the good times we had. I would party until the wee hours of the morning. Drinking with friends, the camaraderie seemed so wonderful. It was my fantasies come true. But that was exactly the problem; it was fantasy and not reality. The night would end, and there was always the morning after. My wallet would be empty, and my head would be too full. Most of us have never seen the tavern the morning after with the smell of stale beer and cigarettes. There are a few of us who would frequent these establishments early in the day to stop the shakes in the morning.

When I was actively drinking and using drugs, I never thought about the next morning. I only focused on the night of partying ahead. I never thought about the consequences that might be awaiting me. This is what I must think about now. I must teach myself to think about the long view. When the lights of the tavern or the lights of my old using friends’ houses seem to shine brightly, I must think about the morning after. I can’t afford to think about the glitz and glamour of the fantasy life. I need to stay in reality - the reality that I can’t drink or use. Have I stopped the “magical thinking” about the fantasy life?

Meditations for the Heart

One of the questions I used to ask myself a lot was, “Why me?” I didn’t understand why I couldn’t drink and use like other people. I couldn’t understand why I kept putting others and myself at risk. I couldn’t understand why I was different. As I began my recovery, I continued to ask myself this question, “Why me?” Then one day things changed for me. Rather than asking, “Why me, why can’t I be like other people?” I began to ask, “Why me, why have I been given this opportunity for recovery?” Many addicts and alcoholics die of their disease. Why have I been selected to have another chance at life? My outlook changed as the question changed. I don’t have the answer, but I believe that God must have a plan for me. God wants me to be useful for His purpose. Am I willing to believe that there is a purpose for me in recovery?

Petitions to my Higher Power

God,

Sometimes I still wonder and even question where You are leading me. Help me to trust and have faith that Your plans for me are good. Keep me willing to follow where You lead. Help me to keep a long-term view of drinking and drugging so that I don’t ever forget the morning after.
Amen.